Three days before the closure I have been nesting in the green dress palace, even the head of the bed has not been down, fortunately I have the foresight, a few days ago the young ladies who were summoned into the palace came in handy, the night snow day with the holy decree of the post-sealing ceremony came down with the holy decree of the remaining three beauties to me as a personal palace maid, so the three days of time are okay, clothes to reach out for food to open the mouth, is from time to time will be the beauty sharp eyes stabbed twice to make me a little depressed, probably because they feel that I am not too dedicated to send them to the night snow dragon bed, but let Li Sichan's little beauty take the lead, and she was a little unhappy!

Qingling hadn't been seen since she cried that day, and I don't know if she was ashamed to know the secret that she liked Yexue, or if she was embarrassed because she had accused me harshly that day. In fact, I really want to tell her that there is no need, after all, she has always been loyal to me, and she has not assassinated me because she regarded me as a rival in love, which is really much stronger than An Qingjie who poisoned me for no reason.

As for Yexue, I didn't go to see him again, my goal has been achieved, it doesn't matter if I see him or not, but occasionally I think of this stinky boy I grew up with and didn't remember to come to see me before marrying my daughter-in-law, and I felt a little uncomfortable, and I felt a sense of desolation after marrying my daughter-in-law and forgetting my mother.

In the past few days, I have been lying in bed and tossing and turning over and over again, all I have been thinking about is what happened to me in my previous life and this life, and I can't escape my life left and right, and I don't know if I have done too many sins in my life, so that my life will be short.

In fact, we have very little time to get along in the past eight years, he is always very busy, the Nanchen royal family and his brothers are all idle masters, and the royal family is exhausted, fratricidally competing for the throne, only the Nanchen royal family, everyone is regarded as a hot potato, scrambling to push out. So the time I really see him in a year is only a few months, and every time I am with him, I always feel calm, and there is a sense of comfort and tranquility, unlike when I am with Yexue, I am always frightened, which makes me want to escape from time to time.

I don't seem to have thought much about Mo Lingshuang for a long time, and when I planned to do something for Yexue before I died, Lingshuang didn't seem to appear in my mind or dreams, which made me very ashamed, just like I had been dragging my feet and refusing to marry him for three years.

Yes, I didn't marry Molingshuang, I didn't marry him for eight years, and I used the title of husband and wife when I was in the valley so as not to let people gossip. I don't say to marry, Mo Lingshuang never forced me to marry, always looked at me softly and dotingly, now I think about it, he doesn't want to marry me, he already knows that his body will one day not be able to hold on, so he just quietly accompanies me and spoils me, and our daughter Xiaoye, is an orphan I adopted on the border between the two countries when I just faked her death, her eyes are big and dark, her thin body curled up in the straw pile, just one glance I was like seeing the night snow, so I took her back, She knew from beginning to end that I was not her biological mother, and Mo Lingshuang was not her biological father, but she gave me and Lingshuang eight years of happiness. Now that Lingshuang is gone, she is also missing, I always feel very lonely, that loneliness is engraved in the blood and bones, even if the night snow follows me in every way, but it also makes me linger, now it's good, even the night snow is tired of me, are you willing to leave me alone?

What is love? As a human being, I never understood what love was.

In the first life, I thought I loved my brother deeply, but until the Beixue Mansion was washed in blood, I entered the palace for revenge, saw the night snow in the secret room, and watched his increasing dependence on me, I suddenly fell into a trance, in that life I had congenital heart disease, all living beings can only live in a hospital filled with the smell of disinfectant water, my parents were busy early, leaving me and my brother to depend on each other, I have no sense of security since I was a child, I strongly rely on my brother, and seeing him intimate with other women will always give birth to a sense of fear that he is about to be abandoned, So again and again coquettish to break up his marriage, because I have never been in love, and I have never even seen any healthy men, vaguely regard my brother as my imaginary lover, maybe I really love my brother very much, but it seems that when a strong dependence on relatives, I was not east, and then a thousand days off, I looked back in a hazy consciousness, and saw those things about my brother and sister-in-law, and then I realized that I actually want them to be happy and happy, I want my brother to be happy, Sincere hope.

In this life, I know that Su Enamel likes me, but I have been using him again, and I have been using him since I was a child, so I told myself at the beginning that I should not be tempted by him, and that one day when the truth is revealed, he will definitely hate me; And Molingshuang, I covet the warmth of his body, just like the warmth of my brother in the previous life, I don't have to think about anything with him, everything will be arranged for me, so that my heart is peaceful and peaceful, but I don't know whether it is love or dependence. And Yexue, I watched him grow up day by day, he was a child raised by my own hands, look at him so good-looking, and so smart, let the pride I be proud, he was not included in the plan at the beginning, the chess piece in the plan was Yeyang, who knew that he was swept into it by mistake, one wrong step, one wrong step, to today's step of the field, the boy around me has now become the emperor of the world, then he is still my night snow? After he had married his daughter-in-law, he would swear before me and say, "If there is anyone in this world who opposes it, I will slaughter one of them; If a hundred oppose it, I will slaughter a hundred. If all the people are against it, I will slaughter the whole world! "What?

Thinking of this, my heart began to overflow with boundless fear, and I sat up from my bed suddenly, jumped barefoot out of bed, and ran towards the palace gate before I had time to put on my coat.