When I came out of the division's guild, it seemed to be very hot this summer, but I felt cold.

Luo Jianwen knew that I was in a bad mood, and I didn't answer after asking once, so he didn't bother to ask again.

When he was in the car, he said, "Where do you live now, give me the address, and I'll send you." ”

But I turned my face to look at the lights shining outside, and I saw the reflections of the trees in the speeding car and the trees kept receding, and they just went backwards.

At this moment, I hope that everything between me and Zhang Minglang can also be like this, retreat against the current, go back to the summer of that year, the year he met me, I still believe that it was my best time, at that time we didn't have to carry the burden of life, don't care about firewood, rice, oil and salt, I fell in love with him so without hesitation, I thought that kind of love was my life.

But the encounter of life has always been a tug of war between reality and dreams, two people from different worlds, even if I once squeezed my head in the name of love, after all, it is only now that I am alone outside his world, looking at it from afar, I originally thought that I had walked in, but I was still like an outsider, as redundant as today.

I hated myself more and more.

I hate such a hypocritical self, I hate myself who loves him like this and can't stand a little frustration, I hate myself who sheds tears when I see him having a meal with other 'women' and his children, and I hate that I am afraid that the status quo will be changed, and I dare not take a step forward to ask a clear, such a cowardly self.

Growing up, I was afraid of becoming the kind of person I hated, but in the race against time, I became the kind of person I hated the most.

Finally, I opened my mouth and said, "Luo Jianwen, do you have any activities at night?" Count me in on one, okay? ”

Luo Jianwen turned his face slightly to look at me, stared at me for no less than ten seconds, and said slowly: "Yes, I made an appointment with Xie Cunhui and Zhang Xiaoyan to come out for a drink in the evening." It's a little bar on the other side of Phuket Street, are you coming? ”

I nodded and said, "Go, why don't you go, I haven't drunk anything in a long time, and I don't know what it's like to be drunk." ”

When he arrived, Luo Jianwen had just parked the car when his phone rang.

It is estimated that it is Huang Simin on the other end, Luo Jianwen is still so dragging when he speaks, and he said into the phone: "Come on, you're almost fine, I didn't go back so early, I asked a friend to come out for a drink, and you can do it yourself." ”

After putting the phone away, Luo Jianwen said to me, "Let's go." ”

As soon as I walked in, my ears were filled with deafening sounds, so I could only follow the direction indicated by Luo Jianwen and saw Xie Cunhui and Zhang Xiaoyan on a table near the bar.

I haven't seen him for many months, Xie Cunhui is still the same, his smile is gentle, his face is dark and scary, but Zhang Xiaoyan, wearing shorts and pants, chewing gum in his mouth, I feel that the change is too great.

It's too noisy to chat, and at the beginning, Xie Cunhui came over and asked me why I came out or something, and I also leaned over and said that I was bored and came out to pass the time or something.

In such an environment, chatting is tiring and panicked, and it makes people's hearts grind, not to mention that I am not in the mood, so I just poured the wine and drank it.

When I was almost drunk, the small band on the other side of the bar began to sing, in such a noisy environment, they actually sang Mayday's "Suddenly I Miss You", and also sang Eason Chan's "Time Tunnel", the lyrics of these songs all 'aroused' my sadness, I took the wine glass and transferred it to the bar, staring at them while drinking, watching and drinking, I was drunk.

In the end, I don't know who took a bottle of cold mineral water and stuffed it into my neck.

When I opened my eyes half-open, I saw Huang Simin and Zhang Xiaoyan holding me, Huang Simin had a black face the whole time, and kept scolding Luo Jianwen, and Luo Jianwen let her scold like a dead dog, and didn't say anything.

In the end, I heard Xie Cunhui say in a daze: "You guys go first, I'll send Chen Sansan back, anyway, I just happened to have something to do with her." ”

Huang Simin was a little embarrassed, and seemed to glare at Xie Cunhui.

Then Xie Cunhui's voice said: "Why are you staring at me, I don't have anything to do with it, I promise to send people back safely." ”

In the end, I lay down on the back of Xie Cunhui's car, one person occupied three positions, lying down and letting the car speed, dizzy and uncomfortable, and I couldn't tell what was uncomfortable.

However, Xie Cunhui did not send me home directly, but drove the car all the way, and when I was a little more sober than just now, he had already stopped the car.

Opening the car door, he said, "Get out of the car." ”

I sat up in a daze, looked outside, saw the four big characters of "Longtan Park", and was shocked to realize that it was already in Longgang Central City.

A little stumbling, I followed behind Xie Cunhui, who didn't say a word, staggering, feeling that those scenes that looked green during the day turned into patches of hideous darkness at night, and I moved them, like the nightmare that had followed me all these years, inseparable from me, and I couldn't escape at all.

And Xie Cunhui in front still ignored me, so he walked on his own, and walked for a while before he spoke in front of him: "What is a 'girl' child doing when you are drunk?" Sober yourself up, and I'll send you back when you're drunk. ”

I was going to answer him, but I happened to come to a small stone arch bridge, and in the bright moonlight I could see some small swimming fish moving in the small pool below.

I didn't know what was going on in my head at the time, but on an impulse, I suddenly climbed on the guardrail and jumped straight down.

After falling into the water, I found that even in such a sweltering summer, my whole body was still icy in such a pool, and I couldn't help but shiver.

The wine completely woke up, and when I raised my head to look at Xie Cunhui with an indifferent and surprised face on the stone arch bridge, I felt embarrassed by my gaffe.

I quickly fluffed towards the shore, and then under Xie Cunhui's indifferent gaze, I became calm and composed, climbed up, and then washed the mud on my feet with the already muddy stream water.

I think my lips must have turned purple from the cold, but compared to the shivering of my body, my heart was even more messy.

In the end, I ran to the top of the stone arch bridge in Xie Cunhui's indifference and picked up my bag, and quickly said to him, "I'd better go back first." ”

After speaking, I was about to leave, but Xie Cunhui suddenly grabbed my wrist, stared at me and said, "Do you want to cry?" ”

I quickly broke free of his hand and pretended to be calm and said, "I'm cold, I'll go back first." ”

Xie Cunhui snorted, and finally said, "Okay, yes, I'll send you." ”

However, when I sat in his car, I had said that I was cold, but he turned on the air conditioner very low, I was shivering with cold, but he was unmoved, his face was full of stiffness and coldness, I reached out to turn the air conditioner on, but he glared at me and said coldly: "Don't move, I just want you to be cold." No lesson, you'll be a dog next time. ”

I didn't have time to lash out at his ruthlessness and callousness, and I didn't say anything more.

Everybody's way of doing things is different, and I don't have anything to blame him for not taking good care of me.

When I got downstairs, his expression was still very stiff, and as soon as I got out of the car, I just wanted to thank him or something, but he didn't even say hello, and directly came over and pulled the car door, and then galloped away.

I was a little puzzled by his current attitude, but I didn't say anything, hugged my shoulders with both hands, dripping with water all over my body, and hurriedly ran to take the elevator.

After taking a shower, I looked at it, it was already two o'clock in the morning, but Zhang Minglang still hadn't come back.

I turned off all the lights, sat in the living room, held the kitten, and kept reaching out to stroke the 'hair' and 'hair' on the kitten's back, I may be really lonely, and spoke to the kitten: "Kitten, what do you think, what is Zhang Minglang doing now?" ”

But all I got was the kitten's silence.

But at that time, my head was really 'twitching', and I might not have a chance to talk again, and I would go crazy, so I continued: "Do you think I'm ridiculous? ”

I guess I couldn't stand me, a 'messy' 'woman', so the kitten sat up one by one, pulled out its 'legs' and left, moved to the other side of the sofa, and lay down.

I finally felt ridiculous, and finally laughed at the darkness, but my eyes were so sour that I couldn't help but reach out and 'rub' it.

When the 'door' was pushed open, I was awakened in my sleep, and then the light was turned on all of a sudden, and there was too much light in my eyes at once, I half-squinted my eyes, and saw Zhang Minglang walking towards me with a tired face, leaned down and asked me: "Why didn't you go back to sleep in the room?" ”

There is still bottomless concern in his eyes, it seems that he only gives me such tenderness, it seems that the scene I saw his tenderness and warmth in the Shiguild at night was all an illusion, and the scene where he scolded Su Xiaomi in Zhang Bailing's office a few days ago also seemed to be an illusion.

I feel like I can't tell the difference between reality and illusion.

The discouragement is from this moment, like a tenacious nail knocked into the heart, and when you move, it hurts.

I opened my mouth, I wanted to ask him where he had gone, why he had come back so late, I still wanted to hear if he was going to lie to me or to tell the truth.

However, before I could ask, he took the initiative to say, "Chen Sansan, I'm sorry, the company has too many things to do today, and I've been busy." ”

I sighed, but luckily I had my face turned sideways, otherwise he would probably have seen my face like a 'flower' that had been thanked in an instant.

At this time, he stretched out his hand, made a gesture to hug me, and said, "I'll carry you into the bedroom to sleep." ”

As soon as I heard this, I stood up, took two steps back, and hurriedly said, "I'll go by myself." ”

And he, after being stunned, said coldly: "Okay, then you go to sleep, I still have something to do, I'll sleep in another room tonight, so as not to wake you up." ”

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