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"Wheat ......" Huo Yize's voice trembled significantly when he saw the blood gushing out of the tip of Tong Mai's nose, and Tong Mai also felt the pain in her mouth and nose slightly, and the red blood slid onto her white clothes, blooming shocking blood flowers.

The breathing became scorching in an instant, not very smooth, Tong Mai breathed heavily, at this time, there was a feeling that someone was choking her neck, unable to breathe, and was about to die, but she had a lot of things to say to Huo Yize: "If I can, I will try to survive!" ”

I don't want to leave him at all, even if I look at him from a distance, I will be satisfied.

So, she will do everything she can to hold on.

Listening to Tong Mai's angry words, Huo Yize's pain suddenly came from all directions, and he stopped and hugged Tong Mai: "Baby, it's going to be fine, I'll send you to the hospital right away!" ”

After speaking, he eagerly hugged her away, and when she was in the car, Tong Mai couldn't support it at all, and she originally had a lot of things to say to Huo Yize, but she couldn't spit out a word in her lips......

If one day, I stop breathing, but I can still remember the look of you holding me anxiously, so eagerly, I can easily feel your heartbeat, your care, your reluctance.

Knowing that you love me and cherish me very much, I am very satisfied.

After going to the hospital, it was obvious that the hospital could not find out the toxins in Tong Mai's body, only that the unknown substances in her body were rapidly spreading to her limbs and bones, gradually eroding her body step by step, which was the most fundamental cause of the coma, and the situation was clearly getting worse day by day......

Although the doctor said that Tong Mai should wake up, it is unlikely that he will not wake up like this, but after a day has passed, there is still no movement, quiet and silent, Huo Yize is not only anxious, but also sad and breathless.

I still clearly remember that when they first met, she was so afraid to go to the hospital, and later I heard that it was because her mother never came out after entering the hospital, so she was also worried that once she entered the hospital, she would never have a chance to go out.

Huo Yize held her hand firmly, as if he was transmitting energy to her: "Stupid, if you don't wake up again, I'm going to peek at your diary!" ”

No matter what Tong Mai writes in his diary? With or without him, he wouldn't be angry or sad, he just wanted to know a little bit more about her and her past...... She almost never mentioned it, and Huo Yize also vaguely knew that she had a difficult time in the past, and didn't want to touch her past and cause her sadness.

While holding the diary, he was still very "gentlemanly" and continued: "I really don't wake up, I opened the diary......"

The diary is not exquisite, on the contrary, it looks old, and it is not difficult to see that this diary has been with Tong Mai for some years.

"You don't believe me, I'm going to open your diary, are you? I'll read it to you now......" His tone was a little childish, more like coaxing a child to tempt Tong Mai to wake up, in fact, reading the diary was not the goal, I just hoped that she would wake up and talk to him, so that he could be sure that she would be fine, at least not so unexpectedly leave him.

Thinking of this, Huo Yize's eyes were a little moist, and his hand couldn't help trembling when he opened the page, and when he opened the first page, the handwriting was not as neat as he expected, but the childish and youthful words written crookedly in pencil:

Mom is gone, and I'm alone.

I don't cry, because my mother said that crying children are not good children, I want to be a good child of my mother, and only by being a good child can my mother not be sad.

……

I met my father, my aunt, and my beautiful sister, and they didn't seem to like me.

Is he my dad, is he my dad? It's just why Dad doesn't like me.

When he saw this, Huo Yize couldn't look at it, her tears fell uncontrollably, her fingertips brushed over the somewhat sloppy handwriting she wrote, and even many words she didn't know how to write at all, and she used pinyin instead, but she could deeply appreciate Tong Mai's strength and loneliness at that time.

She didn't have anyone to talk to, only a diary to keep with her, and it was the best person she could talk to.

No wonder she was so afraid of being alone.

People have been lonely for a long time, the first may be used to loneliness, the second may be more afraid of loneliness, Tong Mai belongs to the second type......

The loneliness and loneliness that were laid on her when she was a child devoured her even more fearlessly when she grew up.

Even though the hysterical pain was circulating around Huo Yize at the moment, he still insisted on watching it......

On the first day I went to the orphanage, I slept with a lot of children, but I was very cold.

In the middle of the night, I dreamed of my mother, and my mother said that she would buy me lots and lots of toys, but? As long as my mother comes back and my mother is there, I won't be cold.

……

On the second day of the orphanage, the clinical child said that I was a child that my parents didn't want, and I was a bad child, and I beat him, so the director punished us for standing for a long time, and from then on, I knew the meaning of the orphanage, and it turned out to be a place to adopt children that my parents didn't want.

I'm really a bad boy that my parents don't want.

……

I thought my mother was dead, but she just slept for a while and would come back to life, but the child said that if she died, she would die and never come back.

Mom, when are you coming back and will you ever come back?

……

I saw my dad again, and my aunt, and I heard that I was going to be sent to London, and I didn't know where.

I said I was going to find my mother, but my aunt hit me: I was a slut.

Huo Yize's tears completely blurred his vision, his body seemed to be crushed on a steel nail, and his internal organs were torn.

There were many typos in the diary at the beginning, and many words were replaced by pinyin, but this was the bravest word Huo Yize had ever seen, the loneliest heart.

Because he grew up in a prosperous world of fine clothes and food, he couldn't understand how much suffering and torture a six- or seven-year-old child had experienced at that time.

Later, it was no wonder that she hated Chen Yuhua so much and hated all the people in the Yin family......

I arrived in London, and the people here were different from us, with blond hair and green eyes, and I was scared.

When my father and aunt left, I grabbed my father's hand and cried loudly, unable to speak, just crying, crying all the time......

In the end, they left.

……

I dreamed of my mother again, and my mother hugged me and said that I can't cry, and that a crying child is not a good child.

When I woke up, it was dark around me, I cried, I didn't want to be a good boy, and no one liked me when I was a good boy.

Here, they treated me like a weirdo, grabbed my hair all day long, and called me ugly.

……

For a long time after that, Tong Mai seemed to be numb, as if there was nothing to write about in London, or maybe something else had happened to her, and she didn't keep a diary for a long time.

Then one day all of a sudden, she started writing again, Huo Yize looked at the time at that time, it was when she was about eighteen years old:

I finally reluctantly got into a university in London, but the bad news was that Old Man Yin no longer paid all my tuition fees and living expenses in London.

On the phone, I also heard Chen Yuhua scold me again as a "slut".

I listened, and I didn't say anything, I couldn't argue, I couldn't plead in a low voice, but? After hanging up the phone, I'll fuck you, Chen Yuhua, you are a slut.

I was angry, I was angry, I was even hesitant, helpless, and for a moment I had no idea what I was going to do.

However, after calming down, there was a crazy thought growing in my heart: I am going to finish my university in London anyway, I am going to be happy and happy to appear in front of them, and see that they are unhappy and unhappy.

I am very motivated to achieve this dream.

……

This summer vacation was very busy, getting up early and working late, working five or six part-time jobs, counting the pounds in my wallet, counting over and over again, hoping to count more and more.

Although tired, he is full of energy.

Whoever I want to prove something? But at least I'm independent now.

Mom, did you see that? After more than ten years of seeing their faces, taking living expenses and tuition fees, I can finally make my own money.

But? Mom, I miss you so much.

I seem to miss you more and more, let me be coquettish, how I wish I could be coquettish like other girls......

……

Today, Yin Yuqi called and said that she was going to get engaged, and the happy and sweet atmosphere on the phone was infuriating, and it seemed to deliberately set off my desolation and my downfall.

She invited me to her engagement party and even bragged about how good her fiancé was on the phone.

Fuck off.

I said, "You are not afraid that I will curse you, so invite me."

A very deep question was mentioned, boyfriend.

I don't have any interest in foreign men, of course, I am a "desperate third sister", and I don't have the time and leisure to do a deep understanding of men.

……

The new semester is at the beginning of the semester, and the tuition fees are not in the plan, which is completely beyond the plan.

Just when I thought I was going to be dropped out of school, a Chinese man named Sam lent me £1,000.

White shirt, slender and tall height, but a little cold face, but with the most enthusiastic heart, he is full of aristocratic atmosphere, and a little melancholy.

He is like a prince charming who came out of a fairy tale, favored and liked by girls.

I was flattered when I held the heavy £1,000 in my hand, no one had ever lent a helping hand to me, only someone who had ever looked at me coldly, and he was the first to help me.

It turns out that there are still good people in this world, and I can't help but have a trace of warmth in my heart, telling myself: don't be gloomy, be full of sunshine.

……

Christmas Eve.

I made an appointment to pay back Sam, but I waited for hours at the school gate and didn't see anyone.

A little disappointed, a little worried, a little sad......

When asked about Sam, it was as if all of a sudden he had disappeared from the world, and all his classmates didn't know where he had gone......

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