Located in the heart of the city, Dongshan Zoo is the largest public zoo in the city, and because of its wealth and diversification, it can still maintain profitability in the current recession of zoos across the country, and even has the spare energy to rent pandas from Beijing Zoo to further attract customers (especially foreigners like Amy).

I wasn't particularly interested in pandas, but when I was in the fourth grade of primary school, my dad had already taken me to the Beijing Zoo, and I only saw the National Treasure poking his dirty butt at the tourists, blindly eating bamboo, and never looking back.

In addition, the panda pavilion at Dongshan Zoo has a separate entrance fee, and I always feel that it is not worth the extra 20 yuan - it only costs 15 yuan to see all the other animals!

"Do you like pandas?" When I bought tickets at the ticket office, I probed Xiaoqin's tone.

Before Xiaoqin had time to speak, the middle-aged woman who was the conductor said disdainfully: "Even the panda pavilion is reluctant to take a girlfriend there, is there such a thing as you?" ”

She didn't ask for my opinion, and took it upon herself to buy me the tickets for the panda pavilion as well.

I'm disgusted with her behavior of forcibly buying and selling, even if what you say makes sense, you should let the customer choose for himself, right? And even if you change your mind and want to go to the panda pavilion, you can buy your own tickets in the park, so you have to buy them here, right?

Could it be a ticketing task from a superior? It's like a moon cake factory uses five-kernel moon cakes to give bonuses to employees, how much does it sell?

So I waved my hand and told the conductor that I didn't need a ticket for the Panda Pavilion, and pointed to the sign next to the ticket office, "10 yuan for 1.4 meters or less", and said to Xiaoqin:

"You go and measure, maybe you can save 5 yuan......"

"Ye Lin's classmates bully people!" Xiao Qin hugged my arm angrily, "Although I am shorter than Ye Lin, I am not that short!" Now many elementary school students are more than 1.4 meters! ”

is also said, there are really not many people around me who are 1.4 meters tall, and Amy can meet this condition, but she neither needs to save the 5 yuan, nor will she admit that she is still in the size of a child.

After spending 30 yuan and buying a ticket for the park without the panda pavilion, Xiaoqin and I started our first serious date along the circular artificial river of the zoo.

Xiao Qin is wearing a white tunic dress and a sunhat on her head, and she has no bones and has to snuggle up to me before she can take a step.

After staying in front of the cage of the sika deer for a while, I suddenly found that behind the rockery far away, the gang members sent by Xiaoqin's father, the two comrades Fat Tiger and Thin Leopard, were staring at us sneakily!

What a ghost! We don't have to come with us at the zoo! What danger can we have at the zoo? It's the nickname of the two of you...... Be careful of being caught by the staff and won't let you out!

It suddenly occurred to me that Amy was being tracked and protected by 004 and 005 all day long, probably in this mood, right?

Xiaoqin seems to have already discovered the existence of Uncle Tiger and Uncle Leopard, but she has not exposed it, so I will treat them as if they do not exist.

Since I trained myself in Sparta, the zoo, a place I used to visit in my childhood, has gradually become unfamiliar, and this time I have made many new discoveries and my mood has improved.

Because it's a weekend, the zoo has a lot of visitors, so some animal shows that don't usually take place can be seen today. For example, two orangutans performed a boxing match wearing gloves, the winner received a bunch of bananas, which amused everyone, and a male elephant performed a spin off the ground with his hind feet.

But after watching the elephant turn around a few times, Xiaoqin covered her eyes, as if she was very shy.

"What's wrong with you?" I asked strangely.

"Yes...... Elephant elephant ~~~~~~" Xiaoqin said in a trembling voice of unknown meaning.

I looked back and realized that the elephant was spinning, and JJ was also spinning! Crayon Xiaoxin once sang "Elephant elephant elephant is as long as your trunk weishenme", referring to JJ! The JJ of a real elephant is very exaggerated! When you are in estrus, it is up to one meter!

"Ye Lin is as ...... as an elephant"

Shut up! If that human thing is one meter long, it's already the level of a monster, okay! And considering the problem of cavernous congestion, if it is up to one meter, it will definitely be impotence! Where do ordinary humans get so much blood!

In order to prevent Xiaoqin from saying more unreliable words, I took her hand away from the elephant show and came to the nearby "alpaca" cage.

The so-called "alpaca", is one of the ten sacred beasts of the "grass mud horse", since the grass mud horse was born on the Internet, such as the sky, zoos around the world have introduced a lot as a means to attract tourists, Dongshan Zoo is especially unwilling to be people, captive alpacas no less than ten.

Because the alpaca is not very threatening, the railing here is not too high, but there is a wooden sign that reads: "The animal is in heat, climb over the railing at your own risk." ”

I didn't take it seriously, I thought that this was the same as KFC's "carefully slipping" to clear the role of responsibility, and I would write it like this all year round, but I looked inside the railing - it was really in heat! Under a thick tree, one grass mud horse is another grass mud horse! Shameless! You can't wait until it's dark and the park closes! There are a lot of children next to them asking their parents, "What are they doing?" ”

"Fight." Parents generally fool their children like this, and children don't think that they will be born to shijie because their parents are so "fighting"!

After retreating from the alpaca, I decided to go and see some beasts, after all, for Xiaoqin, who is a saber-toothed tiger, it is more in her interest to see some of her kind, isn't it?

As a result, the Tiger Stadium was conducting a strange drill.

The tiger, who was locked behind the tempered glass, lay on the glass with its front paws and looked at the people outside with a blank face.

In the prehistoric domestic animation "Brainless and Unhappy", Unhappy once wore a costume and pretended to be a tiger at the end.

There are also people pretending to be tigers in front of him, but his tiger does not show his face, and his whole body is covered with colorful tiger stripes.

However, it doesn't look like a real tiger at all, but it is eight points similar to the Tigger in "Winnie the Pooh".

The Tigger sneakily hid behind the grass for a while, and then walked out on two legs, looking around, as if about to escape from prison, attracting the crowd of onlookers.

At this moment, a gunman in a black security uniform ran out, aimed at the Tigger, and fired a needleless narcotic bullet with a "whoosh", and the Tigger fell in response, and was then carried away by the staff on a stretcher.

"I heard from my mother that Japan has done similar exercises, but they are used to educate gorillas not to run away."

Xiao Qin said beside me.

Was it supposed to educate the tigers? Tigers don't have the same IQ as gorillas, so they can't understand your "performance art" at all! And can't you guys find a more realistic tiger costume! The cartoon Tigger is just a two-legged walk! The tiger may mistakenly think that he can only walk on two legs, and he will be shot down by a tranquilizer gun in a vain attempt to challenge the position of the human "spirit of all things"!

The onlookers also thought that the zoo's behavior was meaningless, and at this moment, the climax came! Tigger was sent back again, and with him, there was also a ...... dressed as a Peking Opera Wu Song!

Everyone was shocked and inexplicable, only to see the Tigger repeat his old trick, and he walked on two legs trying to escape from prison, at this time Wu Song jumped out angrily, held down the tiger and punched it, one punch, two punches, three punches, Tigger hit the street again and was carried away on a stretcher.

Wu Song stood up, his eyebrows were cold to the real tiger in the tempered glass, as if asking: "He understands, do you understand?" ”

Understand, sister! How can you be sure that this tiger is a direct descendant of the tiger on Jingyang Gang! You beat Tigger fatly, do you want to awaken the family memory of this tiger!

Naturally, the tourists laughed so hard that their stomachs hurt, and they all said that the leaders of the zoo were stupid, and they also called and sent MMS messages to friends and colleagues, so that they could also enjoy the grand occasion of Wu Song's tiger fight.

Later, I learned that this was a deliberate publicity campaign by the zoo director, with the natural aim of attracting social attention and attracting more visitors. Not to mention, the effect is so good that several TV shows have reported the news, and even my dad has mentioned it to me on the phone. You can yujian, and the director who is very money-minded will be full of money again.

After that, I took Xiaoqin to see the white peacock that refused to open the screen, and the monkey who thought peanuts were not tasty and only ate pistachios, and then I fed those peanuts to the camels - you degenerate bourgeois monkeys, see how delicious other people's camels are!

Because there are more men of the same age in the zoo, Xiaoqin is nervous at first, but as her attention gradually shifts to the animals, she has more and more fun. When she was feeding the fish to the seals in the aquarium, she mischievously took advantage of the moment when the seal jumped up to eat the fish, and pulled one of the seals' beard as a souvenir (good hand speed), and fed the rest of the fish to the seal in order to compensate for it.

The dolphin performance is also Xiaoqin's special favorite, she waited for half an hour, just to grab the front row position in the next wave of audiences, and when the dolphin topped the ball and drilled the circle, she didn't care even if she was splashed by the seawater.

I thought that when I was eating at the restaurant in the park, I might run into Amy and Xiong Yaoyue, but they were afraid that they would have more food, so they didn't show up.

However, when I went to the toilet after dinner, I met Comrade Tigger in the men's bathroom.

That's right, the one who played the tiger in the zoo's performance art show.

He draped the half-taken tiger skin over his body, showing a ridiculous posture of half-human and half-tiger, and this guy was actually an acquaintance of mine.

Little Ding in the pet hospital.

"Damn, why did you come here to pretend to be a tiger?" I asked him with a smile.

Xiao Ding shrugged, "We graduated from Agricultural University, and it was possible to work in the zoo, and today I came to see a teacher who was a consultant, and he asked me if I was interested in making extra money...... So I pretended to be a tiger! ”

After a few jokes, Xiao Ding suddenly asked me, "Who is that girl with you?" ”

I suddenly felt a little weak: Xiao Ding and Dr. Zhao matched me and Shu Sha several times, and admitted Xiaoqin's girlfriend identity, and I became a big carrot!