After opening the door, Chen Chen walked into the kitchen to cook, Zhang Zhe followed behind him and said softly, "I'll come." Chen Chen shook his head: "You've been tired for a day." Zhang Zhe sat at the bar and watched Chen Chen chop vegetables without saying a word. Wang Qian's harassment made him very nervous, and there were some things he hadn't fully told Chen Chen yet. He wasn't sure if he should confess, but he didn't know if Chen Chen could accept it; Not to mention, this thorn was stuck in his heart, making him unable to feel at ease.

Zhang Zhe didn't know that Chen Chen knew. But she wasn't going to ask, if it was true, it wouldn't make much sense except for proving that Zhang Zhe had done a lot of stupid things. As long as Zhang Zhe is not broken now, she is not ready to ask Zhang Zhe questions from the past.

Chen Chen's skills are not very good, but the rice is soft and rotten, and it is not bad to stir-fry meat with green peppers. It may also be the reason why Zhang Zhe was hungry all day, and he gobbled up his food.

Chen Chen looked at Zhang Zhe and stretched out his hand to straighten his hair; His mouth was full, and he looked at Chen Chen in a daze with his cheeks puffed out. The expression of cuteness actually appeared on Zhang Zhe's righteous face, and Chen Chen couldn't help but reach out and pinch it.

Zhang Zhe swallowed the food in his mouth: "Thank you really today." I know you don't like the way you go crazy. Chen Chen shook his head: "There are many things I don't like, and people always have to do a lot of things they don't like when they live." She pinched Zhang Zhe's face and smiled indifferently: "I'll wash the dishes off in a while." With that, she stood up and went to take a shower.

She didn't seem to notice anything wrong, and Zhang Zhe didn't know if she should be glad that she was hiding it. Looking at her unimpatient back, Zhang Zhe was a little impulsive, wanting to hold her and tell her everything from the place where her life began. But when he saw her eyes, Zhang Zhe didn't dare to say it. He is still worried that he will be abandoned if he is not good enough.

Chen Chen walked into the bathroom humming a song. It wasn't until Chen Chen closed the door that Zhang Zhe came out of the daze of the fugue world, fear still prevailed over reason, Zhang Zhe lowered his head, ate the remaining food in the bowl, and walked into the kitchen.

After tidying up, he walked over and pulled out her book, picked her up and walked into the bedroom, gently placed her on the bed, and then lay down next to her, leaning over half of his body to look at her.

Zhang Zhe just looked at her, didn't move or speak, Chen Chen couldn't help but break the silence: "I'm going to self-study tomorrow." It's almost time for the exam. ”

Zhang Zhe held his mouth for a moment and replied aggrievedly: "I want to go out with you tomorrow, what about the rare weekend, don't you want Ah Xuan to compensate you for your clothes." ”

Chen Chen blinked: "We can go again the day after tomorrow, tomorrow, if you are fine, just stay at home for a day." Chen Chen patted his face, turned his back to Zhang Zhe and closed his eyes.

Zhang Zhe buried his face in Chen Chen's neck, panting softly, Chen Chen's hot snort was tickling, she pushed Zhang Zhe: "Don't make trouble" Zhang Zhe pulled her over by the shoulders and gently explored her neck: "If you refuse to accompany me tomorrow, then you have to compensate me first." Zhang Zhe's voice was full of desire, his lips rubbed against her forehead a little bit, Chen Chen snorted lightly, and reached out to hug him.

Early the next morning, Chen Chen rejected Zhang Zhe's offer to send her and went to the library with her things on her back. He didn't come back until the afternoon, and he didn't send him a message. Zhang Zhe sat on the sofa alone and flipped through the books, his heart was inexplicably irritable like a fire, and he felt uncomfortable all over his body, he threw the book aside, kicked his legs a few times on the sofa, and scratched his hair frantically.

When the doorbell rang, he jumped up and ran over to open the door, as if he had found a venting point.

Wang Qian outside the door made Zhang Zhe quiet for a moment. It was as if cold water had been poured over the head. She was still wearing yesterday's clothes, her hair was messy and half of her face was covered, and her eyes were swollen like walnuts. Zhang Zhe suddenly became anxious again.

"Brother Zhang Zhe, what's wrong with you? Are you unhappy to see me? Wang Qian still looked pitiful.

"It's nothing, I didn't expect it to be you, is there something?" Zhang Zhe took two steps out of the door and asked in an indifferent tone.

"Can I go in and say?" With tears in her eyes, Wang Qian asked Zhang Zhe in a low voice.

"Don't do it, just say it here. Let's go, I don't want to be seen here. Zhang Zhe turned around and closed the door. Lean over and lean against the door.

"Do you hate me so much now? But obviously before I went to study abroad, we were together. Wang Qian's tone was a little choked, she lowered her head and pinched the corners of her clothes, not daring to look at Zhang Zhe. Zhang Zhe felt a little unbearable, even if he didn't like it, he had taken care of it for many years like a sister, and he felt a little uncomfortable when he saw her wronged like this.

"I don't hate you. I just don't want to get too close, it will be misunderstood. Don't cry, please tell me something. Zhang Zhe's face was very unnatural, and his tone softened, trying to comfort her.

"I miss you so much, don't be mad at me. I just wanted to see you yesterday, but I didn't expect Sister Chen Chen to get angry. I'm sorry. Wang Qian cried, her head bowed, her shoulders shrugged.

"I don't blame you." Zhang Zhe was a little out of breath and began to panic. He couldn't be sure if it was Wang Qian in front of him, he sighed, stretched out his hand and patted Wang Qian's shoulder. Zhang Zhe's seemingly encouraging action made Wang Qian pluck up her courage and stretched out her hand to hug Zhang Zhe's waist. Zhang Zhe hesitated, didn't push her away, and touched Wang Qian's hair.

Chen Chen was wearing jeans, a white shirt tucked into his pants, and a heavy bag that made her adjust her posture from time to time. finally came home, but saw her boyfriend standing at the door of the house with Wang Qian in her arms.

Chen Chen blinked, and what was about to flow out of his eyes was pressed back. She adjusted her backpack again and stepped forward.

"Got a guest at home? Who is this? ”

Chen Chen's voice sounded behind him, Zhang Zhe was startled, and quickly pushed Wang Qian away, looking at her with a nervous expression. But Chen Chen didn't look at him at all.

"Yo, little Sissi, I didn't scold you enough to scold you, did I? Not again? Chen Chen's tone was sarcastic.

"I'll come to see Brother Zhang Zhe." Wang Qian's porcelain doll expression as usual made Chen Chen irritable, and she dodged to Zhang Zhe's side.

"I don't think you're scolding now, you're looking for a beating. It's not comfortable to live a good life, isn't it? Do you have to come to someone's house to beg for abuse? Chen Chen was not idle, he pulled out his hand and slapped Wang Qian's face. Wang Qian's fair cheeks flashed red palm prints in an instant.

Unexpectedly, Chen Chen started to hit someone, Zhang Zhe grabbed Chen Chen's arm, and he clearly felt that Chen Chen trembled.

Wang Qian's tears gushed out of her eyes in an instant, and the action of covering her cheeks was weak like broken porcelain, if she wasn't aiming at Zhang Zhe, in the current situation, Chen Chen might also choose to help Wang Qian. After all, people always tend to protect the weak, or in other words, empathy makes them choose to side with the weak, so that when they are bullied, others will help the stronger.

But Chen Chen didn't say anything, she tightened the strap of her backpack, and the heavy books made Chen Chen feel very steady.

"I don't care what you're here for, don't let me meet, and don't let me know. Otherwise, this is only the first time, and next time I will help you get a symmetry and hit your other half in the face. Chen Chen turned around, glanced at Zhang Zhe, and walked back to the house without saying a word.

Chen Chen's gaze was impenetrable for a while, disappointed, angry, and possibly with despair. Zhang Zhe felt his heart tighten for a while, and it was difficult to breathe, so he followed Chen Chen's footsteps and walked back.

Wang Qian grabbed Zhang Zhe's sleeve: "Brother Zhang Zhe, will you leave me?" Wang Qian's crying makeup left messy black marks on her fair little face, and her red and swollen eyes and cheeks were complaining to Zhang Zhe about Chen Chen's atrocities. Zhang Zhe paused: "You go back first, and I'll apologize to you tomorrow." After saying that, he took her hand and walked back to the house and closed the door.

Chen Chen hid behind the door to listen to Zhang Zhe, sniffed, put down his bag and walked into the bathroom.

The shower and faucet were turned on to the maximum, and she sat in the corner of the tub and cried. The sound of the water covered her and she bit her lip and suppressed her sobs, but this kind of concealment of the outside can only deceive outsiders without exception, but she can't deceive herself. She raised her hand and wiped the tears and water from her face.

Disappointed? It's all there. Chen Chen wasn't even so sure if Zhang Zhe really liked her. The most worrying thing is the breakup after falling in love, understanding his dependence on feelings, Chen Chen tried to get rid of it. If you don't love me when I love you, I can't let go in a chic way, but I can't lower my dignity and beg bitterly. Life is a long time, and she hasn't won what she wants most, so she can't fall here like this, she suddenly calmed down and thought about what she should do.

The cold water sprinkled on her body, but there was no coldness at all, she wiped the water off her face, changed her clothes and walked out. Zhang Zhe sat at the door of the bathroom, saw her walk out, and quickly stood up and followed behind.

Chen Chen didn't look back at him, Zhang Zhe didn't know what he should do, the fear suddenly pressed in his heart, he wanted to reach out and hug his lover, but Chen Chen was cold and didn't seem to see him, his straight waist and expressionless face were all printed with the message of 'Do not approach'. He stretched out his hand, touched the hem of Chen Chen's clothes, and shrank back in horror.

She walked back to her room, closed the door, and shut Zhang Zhe out of the door. The sound of the lock was clear and harsh, and she locked her door in this house for the first time. Zhang Zhe put his hand on the door, trembling and biting his lip, trying to suppress his fear.

Chen Chen didn't sleep, she looked at the ceiling with her eyes open. Tears ran down her temples, crooked marks into her cochlea. Some things themselves should not be extravagant, thinking that they can meet the so-called love, but love is such a thing, I have heard a lot, and how many people have really met it? You may meet ghosts in this life, but you may not necessarily meet true love.

She suddenly began to suspect that all her insistence was wrong. Because of his stubbornness and tactfulness, he was directly expelled by his old club; Because of his conceit and intransigence, he left home and lived alone thousands of miles away. She dodged the crowds and the familiar, hoping that she could live the way she wanted. But man is a fickle animal, and he is also a social animal. Living in this chaotic world, you can keep your heart, and you can't be sure that others will keep it.

There was no sound in Chen Chen's room. It was time for dinner, and Zhang Zhe stood up and walked into the kitchen. Washing and picking vegetables, he tried to put on a smile during the whole process, but he could clearly feel his heart trembling. The sharp blade rubbed against the middle finger of Zhang Zhe's left hand, and the skin of the joint in the middle of the entire middle finger scraped off, and the red blood dripping into the green vegetables was particularly dazzling. Zhang Zhe let out a 'hey' and picked out the blood-stained leaves from the dish in a panic. He didn't feel a deep pain, something quietly took root in Zhang Zhe's psyche.

He stretched out his fingers and rushed under the cold water. Wrap your hand with a paper towel and continue chopping vegetables.

The table was full of her favorite dishes, Zhang Zhe smiled, walked to the door of Chen Chen's bedroom, and knocked on the door gently: "It's time to eat." ”

Chen Chen didn't answer, but there was the sound of footsteps. Zhang Zhe took a few steps back to open the door, and when she walked out, Zhang Zhe still had a gentle smile on his face, full of nervousness and flattery. It's like when we were children facing angry elders, the kind of flattering and well-behaved, like a stray puppy that found a home, wagging its tail and humming its throat, making a coquettish sound, for fear of being discarded, and having to face this cold world alone.

Chen Chen sat at the table, swallowing the food mechanically, and her silence made Zhang Zhe's diligent action of picking up the food seem so unnatural.

After she cleaned up, Zhang Zhe stared at her with good eyes, and his big eyes were full of pleading. Chen Chen wanted to go back to the room, but when he saw him staring at him, he hesitated, turned around and walked back to stand in front of Zhang Zhe.

There are some things that are best decided early. She was going to confess.

Obviously, the girl in front of her is only up to her shoulders, but she seems to be in control of her own world. The speed of Zhang Zhe's heartbeat made his breathing tense as well.

"Zhang Zhe" She finally spoke, but in Zhang Zhe's eyes, it was better not to say anything: "Let's break up." ”

Chen Chen's expressionless appearance made Zhang Zhe's heart break for a moment, and he couldn't see the trembling hands that Chen Chen was hiding behind him. He tried to salvage the current situation: "Don't make a fuss, let's watch a movie and go to sleep, okay?" He still had a smile on his face, and the only thing that could save him was Chen Chen's smile in the next second and told him that he was joking.

But Chen Chen didn't say that he was joking.

"I'll find a place to move out as soon as possible. Tomorrow I'll go find an apartment first, and I'll move things in a few days. Chen Chen seemed to be a little choked, but he didn't seem to have it. Zhang Zhe's brain was blurred, and he couldn't clearly judge her tone at all.

Chen Chen tore off Zhang Zhe's hand that grabbed the corner of his clothes at some point, turned around and walked back to the bedroom, and locked the door again.

The whole body was weak, and Zhang Zhe couldn't hold it and sat on the ground.

Chen Chen took out his suitcase, took out a few pieces of clothes and stuffed them in. Tears dripped into her clothes, but she didn't stop moving her hands for a moment. My heart hurts, and my breath hurts. I can't learn it, or I can't learn how to love someone, how to get along with people, I can't learn it. Maybe you have to make a choice, give up all the ethereal dreams you ask for, accept to go on a blind date to form a family like someone else, have a child, and then spend all your life for the child. But what is the meaning of my own life? Perhaps life is about accepting that there is no meaning, and that intransigence is just a stubborn struggle.

In the morning, when Chen Chen appeared with a box in tow, Zhang Zhe was sitting on the ground at the door, and when he saw her coming over, he stood up and walked over, hugging her from behind: "I don't want to break up, don't go, please." Yesterday it was just her coming to me, nothing. Zhang Zhe's voice was thick nasal, as if he had cried. The pain of her heart tightening made her tremble, Chen Chen controlled her voice and said softly: "Zhang Zhe, I also have a heart, and I am also very stingy and jealous. I'm also scared, I'm afraid of everything, I'm afraid to meet people, I'm afraid to communicate with people, I'm afraid of conflicting with people, and I'm afraid that you will leave me. Chen Chen began to sobble and couldn't speak, Zhang Zhe tightened his arms, not intending to let go.

She put her hand on Zhang Zhe's palm: "I heard you say that you went to find her today." Your indecision will come to this day sooner or later, forget it, let's forget it now. lest it be more difficult to accept it after too long. ”

Chen Chen pulled Zhang Zhe's hand, he didn't know how to explain his perfunctory so-called agreement, it was himself who couldn't make up his mind, it was himself who said this agreement, Zhang Zhe suddenly felt that he was dragging her down, and letting her go might make her a little happier.

He hung his hands and listened to the footsteps of Chen Chen leaving, the sound of the door closing shattered his heart, Zhang Zhe knelt on the ground, bent down and curled into a ball. What's next? Zhang Zhe suddenly didn't know what he was doing now, so he could only sit in place and cry silently.