Do you know about numbness? I later realized that after experiencing a lot of the same things, people become numb to what is about to happen or what has already happened, and to put it in layman's terms, I have no sense of what is happening in front of me, I become calm, I become silent, I become, I almost lose part of my feelings.

This is a very terrible thing, if it was in the past, I would have put Hu Yitian in place and then rushed up by myself to save the injured Gu Gang and Zhang Ling.

But I didn't, I clearly knew that even if I went up, I might save them, but the result and process made my chance of survival almost close to zero, so I gave up on them, which would have been absolutely impossible for me to do before, which is why Hu has been shouting for me to save them first after being shot one day, and we all have the same idea.

On the helicopter back, the detachment leader was silent, I sat in the cabin into silence, the sniper team of four people, in just ten minutes, wounded three people, among which Zhang Ling and Hu Yitian were the most seriously injured, this operation was perfect for the Security Bureau, because the head of the foreign intelligence agency was captured, and for the brothers of the border armed police, it was perfect, because they repelled the enemy who would commit the attack.

But for the captain of the detachment, it was very bad, the two excellent snipers and the observer were wounded by bullets in their hands and did not know what the result was, and he kept his head down and did not speak all the way, that appearance seemed to have made me imagine that the captain was angry at him.

Our bodies shook from time to time with the jolting of the helicopter, and like my heart, it beat with the shaking of the helicopter.

After I went back, I wrote the operation report as usual, but from that day on, my whole person became depressed, not as joking with my comrades-in-arms as before, they all knew that one of the four people came back to me on this trip, and they probably thought that I was too sad, and the captain specially invited a psychiatrist to give me psychological counseling.

But it didn't work, although this doctor was very professional, I was telling lies, I lied that I was in a bad mood.

In fact, it's really a bad mood, my psychological problems, I don't feel like there is a problem in my heart, even if there is a problem, I will already have a problem when I go out of that forest again, and I won't wait until now.

The doctor smiled and put the pen on the table, and said, "I also hope that you are in a bad mood, and I hope that you are safe and sound, and you must know that you are about to be discharged from the army and go back, and if you can solve the problem now, don't take it back to the place." ”

The room was empty, and the sunlight shone through the window behind me on my back and on the doctor's face, who was wearing glasses and looked a few years older than me.

I said, "Thank you, but I'm really fine, my comrade is injured, I'm sad, that's all." ”

Then there was another bunch of balabalas, and it took half an hour for him to leave, and I fiddled with my fingers and got up from my seat as well.

The heart said that he was finally gone, and I put my hat on my head and pushed open the door and walked out of the infirmary.

I've been back for three days, and I don't know what Hu Yitian is saying now, but after walking a few steps, I saw Platoon Commander Zhao coming over: "Yo, I came out of the infirmary, I heard that I found a psychiatrist for you, how are you doing now?" ”

I barely managed to squeeze out a smile: "Platoon Commander Zhao, oh, I'm fine." ”

"I came to you on purpose, let's go, let's talk." He reached out and patted me on the shoulder.

"Okay," I nodded.

The afternoon sun was mild, and the two of us walked to a corner of the training ground and sat on the curb on the side of the track.

"How long are you?" Platoon Commander Zhao asked.

"I, I've got two months left, soon."

"yes, yes." Platoon Commander Zhao said: "Two months is very fast, do you plan what you want to do when you go back?" ”

I shook my head: "I don't know, I thought about it before, but now I don't know." ”

"That's a bit interesting, how do you understand it?"

I smiled wryly and didn't answer.

Platoon Commander Zhao stretched out his hand and hooked my shoulder: "There are still two months, it's okay, it's okay." ”

I remembered something, so I asked casually: "When I went to look for Wang Li before, did you send a note to the driver?" ”

I really just remembered to ask casually, and Platoon Commander Zhao didn't hide it when he heard it, but nodded: "I asked him to give it to you, mainly to remind you." ”

I don't understand this, the water of that mission is not deep, it seems that there are words in the words.

"Why don't you just tell me, what do you mean by the depth of the water?"

When Platoon Commander Zhao heard this, he loosened his hand on my shoulder, lifted his hat, and showed an intriguing smile.

He turned his head to look at me, as if there was a lot of things to say in his eyes, and after a while, he said: "A lot of things are not what they seem on the surface, and the things behind this are not something that can be put on display for the public to see. ”

His words made me think that there was something in it, maybe some secrets involved, so I nodded and didn't continue to ask.

"Well, Hu Tiantian's people have woken up and are out of danger, I'll make a report to the team leader tomorrow, you all go and take a look, the team leader has just come back."

"Okay." I heard that Hu Tiantian was fine, and they were finally relieved.

Platoon Commander Zhao stood up and twisted his neck: "Then I'll go." ”

"Hey! Platoon Commander Zhao. I asked, "Which hospital are they in?" ”

He turned around and said, "Where else can you be in the military hospital where you were lying before?" ”

That's good, I was relieved to know that they were all in a hospital, this trip, I can see Yang Yuan again, it's been a few months, this guy won't still be in a coma, and there is no news from him, if you go over this trip, go and see him.

Early the next morning, a few comrades-in-arms who had a good relationship with Hu Yitian changed into regular clothes, and five or six people crowded into the cart of the cooks and uncles early.

After a clanging mountain road, we arrived at the county seat and took a bus.

Our return rate is still quite high, after all, this olive green is rare in that place, this time it will come out five or six, who will look at it twice, we are still very nervous on the bus, although it is stipulated that the military ride is free, but we all voted under the opposition of the driver, these things, I don't know how to explain, none of us want to have that sense of superiority, everyone is the same, the place to pay or pay, there are seats in the car do not dare to sit, this point in the morning is the working time of all kinds of office workers.

There were so many pairs of eyes staring at us in one car, especially me, I had the most scars on my face and hands.

So we stood in the middle of the carriage without saying a word, holding on to the armrests.

Later, a fellow comrade-in-arms complained that he would never wear a military uniform and run out again in the future, it was too uncomfortable, so many people were staring, and the introverted people were eager to find a crack in the ground to get into, and there was no other emotion, just embarrassed.

Most of my comrades-in-arms are very shy, and the feeling of being stared at is always weird, and I know this very well.

When we arrived at the hospital, we inquired with the nurse at the front desk and got on the elevator, which was on the fourth floor, the same floor as when I was hospitalized.

In the elevator ascending, I carried some fruits, and a few fellows with me were holding two bouquets of flowers as silly as if they were about to meet their lovers.

When I walked into the ward this time, I saw a familiar figure, a small nurse, no, it should be the head nurse now, Jiang Xiaoqi.

She also saw me and looked at a group of us in surprise: "I'm going, why are you here?" ”