His answer was as expected to me, and it was the two words I thought: no.

I sometimes don't understand, Concubine Jing doesn't fight or fight in the palace, their mother and son have never coveted high positions, Your Majesty favors them, and the queen has never felt sorry for them, why does he still want to embark on this road.

I couldn't help but speak again: "You are obviously a prince, you have such a noble status, and you never have a grudge against anyone, your father loves you, and your brother treats you well, why do you want to embark on such a road?" ”

He laughed again, "Is the person you said to persuade me to be yourself?" ”

I nodded slightly, "If I persuade you, will you agree?" ”

I thought that what was waiting for me would be the same words he had before, whether I was too careful, whether I was worried about what I shouldn't have worried about, and asked me what I shouldn't have asked.

But I heard him say something unexpected: "Yes." ”

"Really?" I thought I had misheard and wanted to make sure again.

He looked at the water in front of him, a smile appeared on the corner of his mouth, his voice was very small and soft, and he slowly spoke: "As long as you are willing to be with me, I will let go of everything and live a plain life with you." ”

"You're not kidding."

He looked at me again and followed my words and said, "Aren't you in a bad mood?" Tease you. ”

It was as if I had touched something, and I didn't want to say anything to him, so I thanked him and left without waiting for him to say anything.

I didn't know where to go. I don't want to go back, I don't want to go to the Prime Minister's Mansion that I don't like, the Prime Minister's Mansion that doesn't have a little human touch.

I was still wet, but fortunately it didn't rain anymore, so I walked aimlessly on the street, and when I was tired, I found a random place to sit down, and felt my clothes gradually dry, without eating anything, and I didn't feel hungry at all.

If it weren't for the fact that I saw so many living people around me, I really felt like I was no longer alive.

Watch the sun come out again and then set, watch the streets get deserted and the people walking around you decrease one by one, and watch the sky darken.

I still didn't want to go back, and I had nowhere to go, so I just walked like that.

Before you know it, it's late at night.

His feet involuntarily walked to the bridge in front of the Baiyue Tower, and his eyes looked at the moon in the sky in a daze.

Once upon a time, I was here too, with him, looking at the sky and looking at the stars.

"Hold the hand of the son, grow old with the son", what a beautiful word. But it's just pretty. The man who promised me is no longer by my side, and for the rest of his life, he will be accompanied by another person, and he will not need me again.

Looking at the starry sky, I suddenly felt a sharp pain in my heart, and for a moment, I wanted to forget him, but it was only for a moment.

In a trance, he said: "I can obviously jump off the lake of forgetfulness and forget you completely, but when I want to forget, I will know that I am reluctant at all." ”

"Ling Xieyun, you are the only color of my Su Yi'er in the past seventeen years, how can I give it up. Though you and I are no longer possible, though you have wounded me completely. ”

The hand is clenched, the nails are about to sink into the flesh, and the heart is still aching for a while. Tears finally flowed again.

The lake was rippling, stirring up layers of ripples, and I stared blankly at the surface of the lake, and saw that his figure was reflected on it, and there seemed to be reluctance in my eyes.

stared at it for a moment, turned his head suddenly, but there was no one, only lamenting that he was so naïve, at this hour, no ordinary person would have it, let alone him, did I miss him too much, and there was a so-called hallucination.

I wiped away my tears and walked back to the road, it was indeed time to go back.

When passing by the door of Baiyue Tower, a sudden call came into his ears: "Xiao Yan." ”

I stopped, but I didn't look back. I could only hear the footsteps behind me gradually approaching until it stopped, but it didn't make another sound for a long time.

I sighed in my heart, he married my eldest sister, and it was right to say hello when he saw me, but it was just a coincidence, and I still expect him to explain something to me.

He was about to leave, but he reached out and grabbed his arm.

I looked back at him, only to hear him say, "My father has decreed that I will go to Beiliang in three days to discuss the alliance between the two countries." ”

I thought it was ridiculous, and I really wanted to slap him, "You and I don't know each other, why did you tell me?" "After that, I have to leave again.

But he still held me by the tongue and said, "Since you don't know me, let's know it first." In the next, Ling Xueyun dared to ask the girl's name. ”

I smiled wryly, if I hadn't remembered everything, if you hadn't saved me when I jumped off the lake of forgetfulness, if we hadn't met again, maybe everything after this would not have existed.

Ling Xueyun, I never thought that between you and me, there would be such a point of re-acquaintance, thinking so in my heart, but my mouth couldn't help but respond to him: "Su Yi'er." ”

Hearing him continue: "The wine of Baiyue Tower is unique in the capital, the first time we meet, please ask the girl to appreciate her face and have a drink together." ”

I looked at his departing back and followed uncontrollably.

I saw him go to the back kitchen, and I found a place to sit down, and he walked quickly, and it was not long before he came with two jugs of wine and two glasses, and poured them for me slowly.

I regret a little why I listened to him here, but I couldn't help but look at him, and yesterday I glanced at him in a hurry, and all I had left was heartache.

God knows how much I miss him during this time, how much I want to see him, even if it's just to watch.

Perhaps, if you can look at him calmly like this, there will never be another one in this life, and I will not allow it, just let me indulge this time, let me look at him like this a few more times, after today, I will have nothing to do with him.

He was silent for a while, took a sip of wine, and saw that I did not move. Suddenly, he asked me, "Girl, is it the first time you have been drinking?" ”

I shook my head, then I picked up the glass and took a sip, and said with a wry smile, "How so?" Drink often. It's just the first time with someone I've just met. ”

He didn't go on, sighed, and asked me again, "Would you like to hear about my childhood?" ”

His hand grabbed his sleeve tightly, and he wanted to leave at this moment, and replied firmly: "I don't want to." ”

But he ignored my words and began to gush: "When I was born, my own mother died, and I was brought up by my nursing mother. My mother came from a humble background, and my father did not like me, and he did not like me, and I never saw him until I was four years old. I don't know what can cause a father to be ruthless not to look at a child since he was born. For so many years, I have been accustomed to living in the knife edge, accustomed to facing fights and killings every day, and the so-called father has never cared about me..."

At this, he paused, sighed, and picked up his glass again and drank it.

I suddenly sighed for a moment that I was pathetic, I kept saying how much I loved him, but I never really understood him, never really entered his heart.

I also want to ask him why he never mentioned these words to me.

And what about him? Does he know me again?

Maybe my father is right, he and I are originally people of two worlds, he can't give me a lifetime, he can't give me the ending I want, so he persuaded me to let go of the past and live my own life.

But I still can't help it, I feel like I'm just a joke, making the stupidest decision in the world.

Thinking of this, he also spoke to his words: "That son also asked me to tell my story." ”

He stared at the glass in his hand and nodded, not knowing why his sad expression was at the moment.

When I could say it, I didn't know where to start, and after thinking about it in my head, I slowly said, "My story is very simple. When I was eight years old, I met the person who changed my life, the person I loved the most. It was he who made me understand what commitment is, it was he who made me understand what love is, and it was he who made me see clearly what innocence is. ”

Speaking of this, his words suddenly came to mind: "That's just a childhood joke, and you were just my playmate when I was a child." ”

I am now fully enlightened, it turns out that all these years of waiting, these days of love and time, after all, is just my wishful thinking. The sadness and pain I feel now is nothing but my own doing.

I took another sip of wine, tears rolling in my eyes, and continued: "I deeply realized that the things you have been giving up the most are simply worthless in the eyes of others. ”

He suddenly looked at me, and the look in his eyes didn't know whether it was sadness, joy or sorrow.

I avoided his gaze, my heart tightened, I felt a heat in my throat, and then swallowed hard.

"Everything now is my own doing, and I can't blame others."

I stood up, ignoring his expression at the moment, and trotted away from the place.

I thought that after yesterday, when I met him again, I could say to him very indifferently, "Ling Xieyun, I don't love you anymore." I could have lived just as well without you. ”

However, I really can't do it, every time I look at him, it only adds a point to my love for him.

Especially his eyes, which make people look like they are stunned.

It is said that he is just a man, why does he have such a shocking appearance.

Walking through this street, the surrounding area was empty, only a little moonlight could see the ground, I couldn't hold back any longer, a mouthful of blood spurted out of my mouth, splashing all over my clothes, a mouthful of blood.

I sat down on the floor and mocked myself in my heart, was it so useless? He hurt me so much, but I still can't give up my affection for him.

What kind of ecstasy soup did he pour into me that led me to do this?

Those pasts that I can never forget, those promises that I desperately want to protect, in his eyes, are just childhood jokes, and for him, I am just a childhood playmate.