To my surprise, Mrs. Li actually brought Jing'er to Yijian Pavilion to look for me.

"Thank you. Didn't take Jing'er away from me. "Mrs. Li sincerely thanked me.

Thinking of how difficult it was for her to raise Jing'er over the years, my heart softened, and I said softly: "I also want to thank you for taking care of Jing'er so well for me." I can't imagine what would have happened to him without you. Thank you, I will always remember this kindness. ”

Jing'er was playing a game of blind man touching an elephant with the children of Yijian Pavilion, and I couldn't help but smile softly when I saw him having fun, "I'm relieved to see Jing'er so happy." ”

Mrs. Li also smiled slightly at a glance, and she assured me: "He didn't know that you were his biological mother, and I thought that when he was older and could accept it, I would tell him everything." ”

"Now I don't want to think about that, I just need-" I stared at Jing'er not far away, and said softly, "If only he could be happy." ”

Jing'er's eyes were blindfolded by strips of cloth, he walked among the children, stretched his hands and touched around, and when he touched a person, he grabbed it tightly, and laughed: "I caught it!" ”

Izuchen was originally alone, waving her red whisk, and was suddenly caught, and immediately startled, exclaiming, "What are you doing!" ”

Jing'er pulled down the strip of cloth and found that it was a little girl who was caught, so she felt embarrassed and hurriedly said, "I'm sorry, I ...... it."

Chuchen didn't wait for him to explain, he slapped his palm off with one hand, and reached out to push him to the ground.

"Ahh Jing'er was in pain, frowned and complained, "Why are you so fierce!" ”

Izuchen's little face was full of smug smiles, "You deserve it, who told you to bully me!" ”

Seeing this, Mrs. Li and I hurriedly ran over to help Jing'er up, and Mrs. Li patted off the grass on Jing'er's body for her, and said eagerly: "Jing'er, do you hurt?" ”

Jing'er shook her head. I looked at Chuchen who was waving a red whisk as if nothing had happened, and hurriedly called her over, "Chuchen, come here." ”

Seeing that my face was not good, I bowed my head and walked over, and I said with a solemn face: "How can you push people down, what if you hurt people, apologize to him quickly." ”

Chuchen looked reluctant, and said stubbornly: "Master, he bullied me first, I don't want to apologize to him." ”

"He caught the wrong person, not intentionally, but you deliberately pushed him. You say, is it your fault? ”

Knowing that he was at a loss, he lowered his head and stopped talking.

This is Jing'er who spoke, "Auntie, forget it, it's me who is wrong first, she is not wrong." "About seeing me speaking for him, Jing'er didn't reject me anymore, and her attitude towards me became gentler.

I was still in surprise, but I suddenly relented and apologized, and said to Jing'er: "I'm sorry." ”

A conflict with the child was resolved, and Mrs. Li and I immediately looked at each other and smiled.

A gust of wind rose, and the red whisk in Chuchen's hand fluttered, and she was playful, so she jumped up in the wind with the red whisk. For a while, the red breeze was flying, and with her innocent and bright smile, there was a bit of a fairy taste.

Jing'er's eyes widened, she was very curious about the red whisk in her hand, completely forgot about Fang Cai's unhappiness, and ran over to look, "You just danced so beautifully with this." What is this, can you show me? ”

Chuchen raised his eyebrows slightly, and said a little proudly: "This is a red whisk, you don't even know this, it's really stupid." ”

Seeing Jing'er staring at the red whisk in her hand, she hurriedly put the red whisk away and said, "This is given to me by my mother, but I can't give it to you." ”

Jing'er begged, "Just show me for a while." ”

"Not for a while."

Out of the dust resolutely refused to give, Jing'er begged for a long time, he was a little frustrated, and after a while, he went to play with other children.

I stared at Jing'er's figure, and unconsciously became distracted, Chuchen kept pulling my sleeve until I came back to my senses to see her, she frowned and bent her eyebrows and said dissatisfiedly: "Master, why do you keep looking at him and not looking at me?" ”

I lowered my head slightly and said, "Master is with Chuchen every day, can't you see enough?" ”

Izuchen stared angrily at Jing'er in the distance, "I don't like him." As soon as he came, Master left me alone. Master, who the hell is he? ”

My eyebrows froze, and I said meaningfully, "You'll know later." ”

After playing crazy, Mrs. Li brought Jing'er to say goodbye to me, "Let's go back first, otherwise his father will be worried." ”

"Farewell, aunt." Jing'er said goodbye to me with a smile, as if there was broken starlight in her eyes.

Watching Jing'er holding Mrs. Li's hand, talking and laughing and leaving, my heart was sour and astringent, and I was full of emotion.

I still remember when Jing'er was born, she always woke me up crying in the middle of the night, crying made me have a headache, but once I coaxed him to laugh and watched him laugh happily, I felt indescribable satisfaction in my heart, and felt that all the hard work was worth it. Sometimes listening to him babbling, spitting bubbles in his mouth, doing nothing, just looking at him, it feels beautiful.

I remember all of this, but he didn't know anything.

In this world, there are always things that cannot be perfected. There are some things that you don't want to happen, but you have to accept; Some people can't afford to lose, but they have to let go.

——

The spring grass is green, there are many stones in the mountains, the grass and trees are many and messy, and the mountain road is very difficult to walk. Chuchen followed me all the way, brushed aside the blades of grass that slanted out of the roadside, and asked, "Master, we have been on the road for so many days, who are we here to worship?" ”

My steps faltered, and my voice was as low as snow, "It's a very good sister of mine." ”

Today is the day of Asleeve's sacrifice, and I specially rushed over from Chang'an to worship her.

After walking for a long time, I finally arrived.

There was a lot of grass growing in front of Ah Sleeve's grave, and after I cleaned it up with a small shovel, I put food on the table and put incense and candles on it, and for a while, white smoke curled and the candle flame flickered.

I looked at Ah Sleeve's tombstone and said sadly: "Ah Sleeve, my sister has come to see you." You okay? ”

"In this generation, you have gained too little, and you have lived too hard. Sister prays that in your next life, you can get a lot of love, be happy for a lifetime, and never have to suffer again. ”

As he was talking, Chuchen suddenly said in a loud voice: "Master, someone is here." ”

I turned my head to see two people faintly walking in the distance, a woman leading a little boy. The woman was dressed plainly, with the same white clothes and sleeves as me, and the little boy beside her, a small figure, was not up to the waist.

Is this familiar figure ...... Zheng Shuyao?

The woman gradually approached, and the familiar face confirmed my suspicions.

"Sister Aqing?" As soon as she saw me, Zheng Shuyao's face was full of surprise.

The old people were overjoyed to be reunited after a long absence, and Zheng Shuyao explained to me the reason why she left back then.

When Chang Gong said that her parents were seriously ill and asked her to go back to her parents' house to see, he actually tricked her into taking refuge in Luofu Mountain. Later, when she learned of Chang Gong's death, she was in pain, and wanted to follow Chang Gong as soon as she died, but she was pregnant at the time, so she could only choose to live, give birth to the child, and do her duty as a mother to raise the child.

"Thank you for coming to worship Ah Sleeve."

I looked at the six-year-old child, his face was as white as the moon, his eyes were clear, through his figure I seemed to see Changgong's elegant and fairy-like figure, and said, "This is Changgong's child?" What's his name? ”

"Shilian."

Zheng Shuyao pulled the child over and said, "Shilian, come, I've seen my aunt and sister." ”

When Shi Lian first saw the living, he was a little timid, and whispered: "Auntie, sister." ”

Chuchen didn't like him very much, and retorted: "What sister, maybe I'm older than you." ”

Shi Lian pondered slightly, and then asked her, "I'm six years old this year, what about you?" ”

As soon as I heard this, I knew that I was young, so I replied in a muffled voice: "I'm five years old." ”

Shi Lian smiled easily, "That's still my sister." ”

Seeing that Izumi was not very happy, Shi Lian held a dragonfly made of grass in his hand and sent it to Izuchen, "I didn't bring any gifts when we met for the first time. I just made it up and gave it to you. ”

The straw dragonflies are delicate and small, verdant and lovely.

When I saw it, I immediately took it and exclaimed, "Wow, grass dragonfly, it's so beautiful, thank you." ”

Because of this grass dragonfly, Chuchen suddenly changed his attitude towards Shilian, and even took the initiative to say his name, "My name is Chuchen, brother, what's your name?" ”

Seeing that she was happy, Shi Lian also smiled and replied, "My name is Shi Lian." ”

Chuchen's eyes were smart and her smile was bright, she asked Shi Lian for advice, "Brother Shi Lian, the dragonflies you made up are so beautiful, can you teach me?" ”

"Okay." Shi Lian readily agreed.

The two children were happily weaving dragonflies, and I looked at Zheng Shuyao, remembering Changgong's words before he died, but my heart became heavy.

I said solemnly: "There is one thing, I don't know if Chang Gong told you, but I must make it clear to you today." In fact, between me and Chang Gong, there was a marriage in name only, and nothing happened. He only regards me as a relative, and the only one he truly loves in his heart is you. ”

Suddenly revealed the secret of many years, Zheng Shuyao was still in shock, and I said again: "Before he died, he asked me to bring you a word." He said he never regretted marrying you. ”

After Zheng Shuyao listened, her body softened, and she fell directly in front of Ah Sleeve's tombstone, tears raining down, and she cried bitterly.

Some loves, if not spoken, will never be known.

If you had said it earlier, wouldn't you have regretted it? Even if the ending is tragic, at least, there will be fewer regrets.

Zi Wei's grave is nearby, and after seeing Ah Sleeve, I took out of the dust to Zi Wei's grave to worship him.

There were also a lot of weeds growing on Ziwei's grave, and I grabbed handfuls of grass and pulled them out quickly and vigorously.

Thinking of something, the work in my hand stopped, and I whispered to Zi Wei, "Zi Wei, I found our child, but I didn't recognize him, because I didn't want to ruin his current life." You understand me, don't you? ”

Tears gradually appeared in my eyes, and I whispered: "As long as the child is well, it doesn't matter if you recognize it or not." ”

"It would be nice if you were still around, I miss the days we spent together." With that, a line of tears fell.

If you are still here, now, it should be a family of three, reunited, and happy.

I wiped the tears from my face as if nothing happened, gathered my strength, and continued to pull weeds.

I will definitely clean up the cemetery of Ziwei. You can't shed tears in front of him, otherwise, he will be unhappy.

——

After paying homage to Ah Sleeve and Zi Worry, I said goodbye to Zheng Shuyao's mother and son and set off for Chang'an.

At the foot of the mountain, we said goodbye in front of the carriage, Zheng Shuyao sighed heavily, "I didn't expect so many things to happen." The senior brother has been chivalrous and righteous all his life, but he has lived such a hard life. Back then, he told me that he would bring you to see me, but after parting, it turned out that he was separated forever in this life. ”

I looked up at the heavens and sighed deeply, "We can prolong or delay life and death in this world, but we cannot control it. Zi Wei can't control his life and death, but I know that he died for his beliefs, and he died without regrets. ”

Zheng Shuyao let out a long sigh, "Senior brother is always like this, desperate for the sake of righteousness. It's just that I always thought that a person as good as him would have a good result, so that he would not lose his love forever in his life like me. He loves you so much, but he can't stay with you for the rest of his life. Fate is cruel and always likes to separate us. ”

The world is impermanent, and who can completely control their own destiny.

"Take care."

"Take care."

The two of us said goodbye to each other, and the two children of Chuchen and Shilian were also reluctant, and Chuchen cherished the grass dragonfly given to her by Shilian, and said earnestly: "Brother Shilian, I live in Yijian Hall in Chang'an City, and you must come to see me when you are free in the future." ”

The separation was imminent, Shi Lian was also very sad, and promised: "Well, I will definitely go to Chang'an to find you in the future, you have to wait for me." ”

The two children waved goodbye and stepped into the carriage, each on a different path.

Exegesis:

(1) The title comes from Su Shi's "Water Tune Song Head" in the Northern Song Dynasty: "People have joys and sorrows, and the moon is cloudy and sunny. ”