Life is sometimes more boring than variety shows.

One morning in the fourth lunar month of the 11th year of Chenghua in the Ming Dynasty (I later learned that it was 1475 AD), two beggars and I fought on the streets of Pingyang Mansion, attracting many idlers to watch and cheer.

The reason for the fight was that there was something wrong with our communication. I'll admit it was my first move. I hit the tall, skinny monkey on the head with a stick, and then kicked the short, donkey, but it wasn't up to me, who accused me of having a mad bies attack.

The big bag on my head and the bruises on my body tell me that this is really not a variety show.

How so? I'm fucking crossing!

The world is just so fucking unfair. As soon as people cross, either a brother or a prince, not a princess or a young lady, the most unfortunate is also a rich second generation, wake up around either a glamorous wife, or a caring maid, I am good, the dignified excavator little prince is dressed as a beggar, and when he wakes up, he is surrounded by foul-smelling rough men.

People always say "reality is so cruel", and I would say that crossing is not much better.

After two full days of starvation, I had to compromise.

The two beggars should have had a good relationship with "me", they didn't hold any grudges, and they happily gave me half a pancake, almost choking me to death.

After some roundabout talking, I finally got to know me, no! It's him, the stinky beggar who carries my spirit. He fled to Pingyang Mansion about three years ago, no one knows his details, only knows that he is called "Leper Zhang", probably because of his surname Zhang, but some people are directly called "Leper Dog"; He was the sixth in the family, and he was nicknamed "Hanako Six", as people would call him when they still had a hint of respect.

Last night I was sleeping on the side of the street when I was bitten by a dog by the night watchman, leaving two rows of deep tooth marks on my buttocks. This is another deep understanding of the importance of a house after "marrying a wife".

They agreed to take me back to my accommodation on the condition that I would not have "mad rabies" again. Lao Tzu has never had "rabies", you two fools!

The so-called dwelling was a ruined temple with dozens of beggars lying in it, and the sour smell of the air made me sick.

In the middle of the temple is a red-faced man with a broken arm, who must be the second brother of the righteous Bo Yuntian. Lying under the clay sculpture is a fat, strong, black-faced man with big hands and feet, presumably Liu Er, the beggar leader in the mouth of the donkey and nicknamed "Hei Guan Gong".

Seeing me enter the temple, Liu Er put down the bone stick in his hand, sat up and shouted: "Listen to the thin monkey, you leper dog let the dog bite, isn't that a dog biting a dog?" Yes! Hahaha......"

The beggars on the ground laughed along, and the room was filled with shrill voices, and I panicked.

"Although you are a leper dog, you will play with your skin when you eat it dry and wipe it clean, but Lao Tzu listens to the teachings of the second brother Guan and can't help but be righteous. Seeing that you let the dog bite you and suffer from madness, I will exempt you from paying tribute for ten days, and the brothers will take care of it, and we will talk about it when you are well. After Liu Er finished speaking loudly, he took the bone and gnawed it again.

"Don't hurry up Brother Xie, hurry up!" The skinny monkey pushed me hard behind my back.

This exploiting class with a black conscience is even more ruthless than our foreman, who has grown fat by squeezing a group of beggars and is a big fat dog. Skinny Monkey, you spineless Hanako, even let me thank him? It's really unreasonable! Did you know? In our time, no matter how big an official or how big a boss was, as long as Lao Tzu couldn't get used to it, he dared to pick his son and leave, how domineering it was, do you know?

But the thought of that vicious dog and the aching ass from last night forced me to compromise again.