Zhiyue got up and helped me, checked my pulse and said: "Little boy, melancholy is frustrated inside, traumatized outside, injured both inside and outside, and has suffered from cold in the past few days." The little boy should love himself. ”

As if I hadn't heard him, I stared at the air in the meditation room in a daze, not knowing what I was praying for.

It took me a while to stand up slowly, and the tingling pain in my abdomen didn't make me more awake, as if I was in a dream, and everything around me seemed so ethereal.

Zhiyue helped me to walk outside the meditation room, and I returned to the Guanyin Hall. The hall was full of people, and I stood outside the hall and thought for a while before finally walking in.

The tall Buddha statue looked at all living beings as before, and when I looked at her, she also looked at me, and I felt in a trance that I had seen this gaze, as if my mother was looking at me with a loving face, and as if Ruoxiu's Ying Ying eyes were looking at me.

Zhiyue didn't even have time to help me, I already fell to my knees, tears raining down. If the mother were still alive, how would she comfort this unfortunate son? I just feel that everything is so sad, why do the people I love so much have to leave me?

I looked at the futon in front of the statue again. Ruoxiu seemed to be kneeling there, praying with her hands folded as she had been all those years ago, and there was a hazy halo around her, and when she had finished praying, she turned her head to meet my gaze, and suddenly smiled at me, and then disappeared.

I lunged at this direction and called softly, "Ruoxiu! I screamed, only to feel a spasm in my abdomen, and my brain felt like it had been hit hard by a heavy hammer, and I fell at Zhiyue's feet.

When I woke up, everything around me was so familiar that I could even hear myself and Ruoxiu chirping, and the voice was so familiar and intimate that it gave me the illusion that she was here, never left.

But when I looked around, the room was empty. I looked straight at the screen, expecting Ruoxiu to lean against the table behind the screen, perhaps she had just folded a few plum blossoms from the outside, and was thinking about how to insert the bottle; Or, she noticed that the tea on the table was cold, and she had just asked someone to change the pot, and knew that I was thirsty, and was pouring me tea...... But I waited so long, and I didn't see her come in through the screen.

I struggled to get up, but found that it was impossible, there was no strength in my body, and I was dizzy.

After experiencing so many joys and sorrows, in the end it was just a dream. If it was really a dream, it would be better if I opened my eyes and didn't lie here, but in that weird alley in Xi'an City, or simply couldn't sleep, it would be better than now.

I felt as if my heart was no longer whole, as if a knife had cut through the middle, leaving a bloody wound that I did not dare to touch, and sometimes even forgot about it, but even if I deliberately avoided it, the pain in the wound could not be avoided in any way, and it intensified until my brain lost consciousness again.

This repeated torture continued to erode me, and although I was lying on the bed, and everyone up and down the house was worried about me, I still felt that the strength in my body was gradually withdrawn from my soul, and sometimes I even felt that maybe this time I fell asleep, and I really never woke up again.

I don't know how long I can hold out, but Ruoxiu's figure began to appear in front of me frequently, sometimes sitting on the edge of the bed looking at me, sometimes leaning over my chest and quietly staying with me, and sometimes pulling my arm to the pillow and whispering in my ear.

"Built, let's go to a place where no one can find it, okay?" Once, Ruoxiu asked softly in my ear while scratching my hair.

I nodded, smiled and kissed her forehead, and said, "Okay, I'll accompany you wherever you want to go." ”

She suddenly stood beside the bed and beckoned to me, "Then let's go." ”

I nodded in a daze, got up from the bed, followed her and took her hand and said, "Go!" ”

I was about to follow Ruoxiu out of the door when a cry behind me shouted, "Big brother...... Eldest brother! Wake up! Wake up! ”

I was startled, turned around, and found that I was lying on the bed again, Ruoxiu didn't know when he was gone, only Sanniang was crying very sadly.

I raised my hand and touched her head, and smiled, "What are you crying about?" ”

She looked at me with a frightened look on her face, and asked rhetorically, "Big brother, what did you say?" ”

It was then that I realized that she hadn't heard me clearly. But I couldn't answer her, I just closed my eyes weakly and shook my head. I don't know how long it took, but I fell asleep again.

Daddy appeared in front of me, looking at me with a serious face, I had never seen him look so stern before, he didn't say a word, just stared at me, as if to see me through.

This gaze suddenly turned into a myriad of needles stabbing at me, and I felt very uncomfortable all over my body, and this discomfort turned into a hot scorching, and my chest was extremely annoyed, and I couldn't help but vomit blood out of my gulps.

The uncomfortable feeling disappeared suddenly, and everything returned to quiet and peace, and I stayed in this quiet and peace for a short time, and finally slowly came to my senses.

Dad was still looking at me, but his eyes were soft and loving, and when he saw that I finally opened my eyes, he smiled tiredly, and said softly: "Jiancheng, my father knows the pain in your heart, but the deceased is gone, if you don't live well, she ...... And how to rest? ”

Thinking of Ruoxiu, my tears couldn't stop sliding down the corners of my eyes, Sanniang leaned on the edge of the bed to wipe my tears, and said, "Big brother, sister-in-law also hopes that you will live well, don't you?" ”

Dad hesitated for a while, turned around and walked out, I found that he was a lot thinner, the pain of losing his wife, he felt the pain, and naturally could understand my pain, how could I let him bear the pain of a white-haired person sending a black-haired person to a black-haired person at the age of half a hundred? If I really die, that's the biggest unfilial piety.

The faces of my mother and Ruoxiu came to my mind over and over again, and I once again felt that perhaps being alive was the greatest misfortune.

The weather gradually warmed up, and my father no longer came to see me, so I asked Sanniang to find out that Yang Guang had conquered Goguryeo for the second time, and my father was pulled to be responsible for transporting grain and grass.

It's a conquest again...... I recalled the woman I killed on the shore of the river, whose daughter was she? Are you married......

I knew I was overthinking it again, so I quickly put it back.

Zhang Wensu came to see me, although his complexion was still very bad, but compared to me, he was already much better, when I opened my eyes, he was sitting on the edge of the bed, and he did not change because of what happened to me, he still looked like a hanger, only because of his poor physical condition, he restrained a little.