(a)

There's one thing you used to laugh at yourself. Pen @ fun @ pavilion wWw. ｂｉｑUｇE。 ｉｎｆｏ

Here's what happened: You came into coaching because you didn't want to be a professional soldier, but in the short time you were coaching, many teachers and students thought you had served in the military. Once, you shook your head helplessly and said, "It seems that I can't do without it." ”

The reason for this illusion is mainly your upright temperament, but the pair of suede boots that you often wear on snowy days is, I think, also a very important factor.

Those leather boots are a rare luxury among your personal belongings. It's worth even more than your bike. It's also one of the few valuable things you bring out of your home.

It is a gift from your father to you on your birthday. It was a pair of leather boots custom-made for senior officers by the army of an Eastern European country, with excellent texture, exquisite style, high-quality materials and beautiful design.

The same fashionable texture and design were difficult to see in the country at that time.

When you wear it and walk down the street, it often attracts frequent lookbacks.

It was a personal gift from your father during a military exchange of visits between the country and my country. But because of the slightly larger size, your father barely wore it.

When you finally surpassed your father in height, your father thought of passing it on to you.

When you put on these leather boots and show up in the living room of your home, the eyes of the whole family will light up. The thought came to everyone's mind: these boots were made for you.

It's exactly the same as when everyone else sees you wearing these leather boots, and it sets off your inner heroism and majesty to perfection.

Your father looked you up and down for a long time, and then he trembled his lips and said, "You kid should join the army!" You kid was born to do this! You are a natural officer! ”

At that time, you had not met the red-clothed lama in Qinghai, so you did not object to your father's words, and you also knew in your heart that you would definitely belong to the army in the future.

More than once, I have seen teachers or classmates at school, staring at your boots, persistently asking if you were an officer in the field army when you were in the army. When you answer that you have never enlisted, everyone without exception has an expression of disbelief.

(b)

There are also many versions of speculation circulating in the school about the origin of your leather boots.

Some people think that these luxury-looking boots may not come from the right place, because with your past history and your current salary, you can't get and can't afford to buy something like this. They guess it's smuggled goods that you bought on the black market or stolen goods that have been sold. This view is the most prevalent. Some people even ask you where you can find a safe way to buy such good things at a cheap price.

While others speculate that these boots represent your family's true background and social status.

In the eyes of those who hold such a view, you should be a prince who has fallen into exile. Perhaps, it was your illustrious family that specially let you go out and experience the difficulties of life for some far-reaching cultivation purpose.

There is also strong support for this view. Because both your knowledge and your vision make it hard to believe that you haven't been well homeed. Your gentle personality and your conversation are also hints at your family's upbringing.

And you, for both of these speculations, laughed off and did not justify them.

(c)

I've never taken a picture of your boots, so it's hard to show them here today. It can only be described as having the style of a martin boot with a shiny buckle. It has some valgus fur on the upper part of the boot shaft, which is very warm to wear.

When you wear it, your hands are often casually inserted in the pockets of your coat, or in the pockets of your pants, and that look, I don't know how many times I feel dizzy and make me look a little dazed.

After all these years, when I think of your demeanor, I can't help but feel a little stunned.

I can't tell what is appealing to me, but I just can't take my eyes off it.

That feeling, like, like, like what? Maybe it can be described like this: it is like a person who gets up in the morning to comb his hair, and suddenly sees in the mirror that the wall behind him has turned into a steep ice peak, and on the cliff of the ice peak, a snow lotus is slowly blooming.

I was shocked, inexplicably intimate, and fascinated.

I know that many women, including Sister Wen Li, including girls like Xiao Song, including the female teachers who come back to see you when they pass by, including the waitress who specially give you an extra spoonful when you are cooking in the cafeteria, are also fascinated by your handsomeness and uprightness in boots, but they will not have the ancient admiration and obsession that is so deep that I can't help myself.

Their intoxication is very superficial, unlike me, which penetrates into the roots of all things.

(iv)

Sometimes, I'm so caught up in such complex and inexplicable feelings that I feel like I'm too dumbfounded. It made me feel a certain amount of shame.

I don't think I can keep looking at you like that. If I continue to look at you, all my thoughts will stop.

I will no longer understand you, and I will no longer be able to answer you. My heart will be filled with you, and I will be swept away by the desire for you to be close to me and embrace me.

I will be suffocated by the happiness of being around you. I won't be able to breathe. I'm going to be overwhelmed.

I don't know what I'm going to do.

So, whenever such a sweet panic swells up from the bottom of my heart, I always bow my head and look at the ground silently.

I saw the boots alternate left and right in my field of vision. I saw their footprints in the snow.

I remember every bump, every curve in those footprints.

I saw our footprints side by side behind us, stretching from behind us into the passing of time, in a long string, until they disappeared from view.

So, I feel that the world is so complete and that life is going well.

In this way, I put all the attachment that a girl's first love can contain in the staring down and memory inscription of your boots.

As I write this line, I can clearly hear the slight creaking sound of them stepping through the snow.

That's one of the most intimate sounds in the universe.

Whenever I hear them, I know that I am not alone.

They mean understanding, they mean trust, they mean companionship, they mean safety. But they mean much more than that. They also seem to mean that something extremely old has been satisfied.

My happiness is mixed with deep weariness. There were some sighs, some tears, rising from the depths of my heart that I don't know how deep, and making my nose a little sour, and my throat was choked with something. (To be continued.) )