However, when the proprietress came out after she was busy, she found that her husband was gone. Pen, fun, pavilion www. biquge。 infoAfter a while, my husband came back. But he didn't come back alone, he went to the town and brought a group of teenagers with sticks and knives. The boss decided: When this group of people is asleep, he will take the opportunity to attack the group of bandits in his eyes and eliminate the harm for the people!

When the proprietress heard this, she broke out in a cold sweat, "I think these people are extraordinary, and they are heavily guarded. Don't act rashly," the boss became angry when he heard it! What are these words? Dare to go wild on our territory, who is afraid of whom? The boss decided: tonight we must do the right thing for the sky and clear the bandits!

The proprietress saw that the dissuasion could not be achieved, so she had another plan. She immediately brought out the good wine and entertained the group of teenagers brought by her husband, "Since everyone wants to do great things, let's drink a few bowls of the bar first." Wine is a good thing, and drinking it strengthens your courage."

The proprietress tried her best to persuade her to drink, and the main object was her own husband. Before he knew it, he was drunk. The proprietress immediately took out a rope and tied up the drunk man in her house. These teenagers saw that they were out of play, so they had to scatter one after another. The murderous scene in the store woke up Liu Che and his party early. However, the smart proprietress immediately killed the chicken and cooked, and invited Liu Che and his party out to drink and apologize. After hearing this, everyone was terrified...

Because he almost got into trouble, everyone's fun was greatly reduced. The next day, Liu Che decided to go home. The first thing he did after returning to Chang'an was to summon the proprietress who saved him and give him a thousand catties. At the same time, he also summoned the arrogant boss to worship Yu Linlang.

Liu Che took advantage of the excitement to hunt and returned in defeat. The lesson is that you can continue to hunt, but you can no longer stay in private hotels, that would be too dangerous. So he ordered: to build 12 secret palace hotels such as Changyang and Wuqi south of Xuanqu.

But Liu Che immediately felt that this was still not good. First of all, the road is too far, and it is really hard to run, and the farther you run, the higher the risk factor; Secondly, along the road are people's farmland. Once trampled, the people's grievances boiled once. Such an inconsiderate accusation against the people is not good; Finally, there is an immortal queen mother, a powerful queen mother, and a noisy queen in the palace, if they know that they go out of the palace to hunt in private, it will be a big trouble!

So what to do? It's simple: hunt in the Upper Gardens of the Royal Gardens! But Liu Che felt that the scale of Shanglin Yuan was too small, and he was not happy. So he came up with another thought: it is better to expand the Shanglin Garden, break through the barriers along the road, and go straight to the natural hunting ground Zhongnan Mountain...

It's a crazy and extravagant idea. The vast area south of Acheng, east of Xu, and west of Yichun must be completed by a huge enclosure and demolition work. It is hard to imagine how much silver taels of the treasury would be spent on this project!

Liu Che handed over this work to the Taizhong Doctor Wuqiu Shouwang to complete. He also specially summoned the lieutenant and the left and right internal historians to greet them, and asked them to fully cooperate with King Wuqiu Shou and do a good job in enclosing and demolishing the land.

With the cooperation of others, the work of King Wuqiu Shou began quickly. Soon, a report was submitted, and King Wuqiu Shouwang thought that there was no problem in expanding Shanglin Garden. Liu Che was overjoyed and prepared to start construction.

However, at this moment, someone came to admonish: Dongfang Shuo is well-informed and knowledgeable, and the books of the hundred schools of thought are all-encompassing. When Liu Che first ascended the throne, Dongfang Shuo also rushed to Chang'an from the distant plain county to participate in the interview.

Dongfang Shuo wrote a long essay. At that time, paper had not yet been invented, and the strategy could only be written on bamboo slips. According to Sima Qian, Dongfang Shuo's policy spent about 3,000 pieces of bamboo slips. And Liu Che read it for two whole months before finishing it. For two months, Liu Che read every day. Mark it wherever you read, and read it again tomorrow. And Liu Che is not struggling alone. Because he alone could not turn out the 3,000 pieces of bamboo slips, it took the cooperation of two strong men to support it.

Writing overweight and overweight theories is just one of Dongfang Shuo's specialties. Dongfang Shuo's cover letter is also a strange text through the ages:

My parents died when I was young, and I was raised by my brother and sister-in-law. I learned at the age of 12 and was diligent and studious. Three years of reading is enough for a lifetime. At the age of 15, he began to learn swords, and at the age of 16, he learned poetry and books, and read 220,000 words. At the age of 19, he learned the art of war, was familiar with the use of various weapons and formations, and also read 220,000 words. In addition, I have a bold personality and keep my promises, which is simply a rebirth of the sub-road. I am 22 years old this year, 9 feet 3 inches tall (about 215 cm today), eyes like pearls, teeth like shells, brave as Meng Wei, Jie Ruoqing Ji, Lian Ruo Uncle Bao, Xin Ruo Weisheng, people like me are qualified to be the minister of the Son of Heaven, right?

Come on, don't blow it anymore! If you blow it again, I'm afraid the sky will be blown by you! However, there is no shortage of braggarts in the world, what is lacking is cute braggarts. Liu Che laughed and immediately arranged a job for Dongfang Shuo: waiting for the Zhao bus.

The bus government is engaged in reception. When the subjects write to them or the emperor conscripts them, they are all the responsibility of this unit. Dongfang Shuo is tall and big, his teeth are good and he can gnaw, he can blow and blow, and let him do reception work, which is really right. However, how does Dongfang Shuo himself evaluate this job? Disappointed, very disappointed!

First of all, this is all errand work, there is no oil and water to fish, and the salary is very low; Secondly, he worked day and night all day and night, but he couldn't even see the emperor's face. What is the future of such a job? In addition to being disappointed, Dongfang Shuo was also quite depressed. After reading so many books, I still can't fill my stomach. Could it be that I can only be a receptionist for the rest of my life? Is old age dead in this post?

Of course not! But reaching out to the emperor for an official is definitely not a good way. The best way is to let the emperor willingly take the initiative to make himself an official!

At that time, there were two kinds of men who served the emperor: eunuchs and dwarfs. One day, Dongfang Shuo pretended to have a heavy expression and said to the gnomes, "Brother, I have unfortunate news here, but I don't know whether to tell you or not. I have said that I am afraid to break your hearts; But holding it in my heart, it hurt my conscience again" The dwarfs all opened their eyes wide, looking at what misfortune was going to spit out of Dongfang Shuo's mouth? However, Dongfang Shuo wanted to speak and stopped, so he didn't say anything. Big brother, do you want to say it? It's a real rush!

Dongfang Shuo swallowed his saliva for a moment, and finally said, "But there are words first." I just heard about it, but I don't know if it's true: I heard the emperor say that you dwarfs are a bunch of waste, you can't be officials, farmers, soldiers, and you have no use for the country, but you have to waste so much food, so I decided to kill you all" When the dwarfs heard this, they all cried out in a hurry. At this time, Dongfang Shuo said sympathetically, "Brothers, don't cry. It's not easy for everyone to mix, I can teach you a life-saving method" The gnomes immediately held back their tears and asked in unison. Dongfang Shuo pretended to be mysterious and told them to be like this. The dwarfs were so happy when they heard it, it turned out that the method was so simple, so they did what Big Brother Dongfang taught!

In fact, the gnomes were all fooled. One day Liu Che went out and was stopped by the dwarfs and cried, begging them to be let live. Liu Che was inexplicable, "What's wrong with you" The dwarfs said, "Your Majesty doesn't dislike us and is useless, and wants to kill us" Liu Che "When did I say this, "The dwarf" was said by Dongfang Shuo" As soon as Liu Che heard it, he summoned Dongfang Shuo to question. And Dongfang Shuo has been waiting impatiently for a long time. He set up this plan just to let Liu Che summon him!

Dongfang Shuo finally met Liu Che. Liu Che unceremoniously opened his mouth and scolded, "You are lying to confuse the public, don't you have the king's law" Dongfang Shuo calmly replied, "The minister was about to see His Majesty to explain the matter: The dwarfs are only more than three feet long, and Yulu has a bag of millet and 240 yuan, and I am more than nine feet long, which is three times as long as theirs, and it is also a bag of millet and 240 yuan, is it not enough for me to eat?" Today, I finally met Your Majesty, so I will make it clear: If Your Majesty thinks that I can be of use to you, please give me a salary increase. Otherwise, let me leave Chang'an, so as not to waste your little food," Liu Che laughed.

The palace is so strict that even the expressions are patterned. And Dongfang Shuo is like a small fish jumping in a dead lake, allowing the emperor to see a trace of vitality and fun on the surface of the lake. Soon, Liu Che gave Dongfang Shuo a new job: to wait for the Golden Horse Gate.

Golden Horse Gate, signed by the official. It is named after the bronze horse next to the door. Compared with the previous waiting bus, Jinmamen is in the palace, and the probability of meeting the emperor directly is very high. For this new position, Dongfang Shuo didn't say that he was satisfied or dissatisfied, so he just did it.

Since Dongfang Shuo's dwarf, Liu Che has been impressed by Dongfang Shuo, and often summons Dongfang Shuo to drink together. And Dongfang Shuo's task is: every time he drinks, he must make the emperor happy. Liu Che and Dongfang Shuo drank so many times, and none of them were unhappy. As soon as the emperor is happy, he will reward him with it. Those who come from Dongfang Shuo do not refuse, and accept all the orders.

Once, Liu Che ordered the attendants to be rewarded with some meat. The meat had already been brought and placed in the hall, but the official who was in charge of distributing the meat never arrived. Dongfang Shuo was impatient, directly pulled out his sword and cut off a piece of meat, and said to his colleagues, "It's hot, we should go home early." Please accept the reward," he said, and then took the meat and left. After that, Daguan Cheng finally came, and saw that everyone was there, except for Dongfang Shuo, and when he asked, he learned that Shuo had cut his flesh and left, so he reported the matter to Emperor Wu of Han.

The next day, Liu Che asked Dongfang Shuo to admit his mistake in front of his colleagues. Dongfang Shuo got up after thanking him, and began to criticize himself, "How can you be so unreasonable if you don't wait for the order to come." Draw a sword and cut meat, what a majestic spirit! Not much is cut, what an incorruptible character! Take the meat back to his wife, how affectionate" Liu Che laughed after hearing this, "I asked you to admit your mistakes, but you boasted about it" As a result, he rewarded Dongfang Shuo with a stone of wine and a hundred catties of meat, and asked him to take it back and give it to his wife Xijun. Dongfang Shuo is not shy, the second is not ambiguous, and the third is not hesitant, he turns around and leaves after packing, and he is never obscene...

Dongfang Shuo was so funny that it soon became the headline of the gossip news after tea and dinner of the people of Chang'an every day, and he had the title of a 'madman'. One day, a Lang official finally couldn't help it, and asked Dongfang Shuo, "Do you know that people outside are talking about you and saying that you are crazy?"

Dongfang Shuo smiled slightly: The world laughs at me for being too crazy, and I laugh at the world for not understanding. He finally opened his mouth and said a confidant to this Lang official: "The ancients ran into the deep mountains and old forests in order to escape the world. And I, Dongfang Shuo, am hiding from the court. As the so-called: "Da Yin is hidden in the court" The two words "Da Yin" have become the top secret key to interpreting Dongfang Shuo. Dongfang Shuo himself also has a drinking song as evidence: Lu Shen is vulgar, and he escapes from the golden horse gate. You can escape the whole body in the palace, why bother deep in the mountains and under the Songlu?

At that time, in addition to hunting, guessing riddles was also one of Liu Che's favorite entertainment activities. One day, Liu Che was playing a guessing puzzle with a number of alchemists.

Liu Che buckled a gecko back, and then asked these so-called masters who can communicate with ghosts and gods to guess, but unfortunately no one could guess correctly... The emperor's reward is really not easy to take. However, at this time, Dongfang Shuo came, "I have studied "Yi", let me take a hexagram first and then guess it"

Of course, divination is just a cover. The advantage is: if he can't guess correctly, Dongfang Shuo can say that he is not accurate in dividing the hexagram, which has nothing to do with whether he is smart or not. Let's take advantage of the previous hexagram. According to the hexagram, this is not a gecko, it is a lizard... Sure enough, I guessed it, and it was better than Sun Wukong's partition guess in "Journey to the West"!

If Ban Gu hadn't written this matter into the "Book of Han", I really wouldn't dare to believe it. How did Dongfang Shuo guess that it was a gecko? Excluding the possibility of cheating, we can only marvel: his head is indeed extraordinary!

Dongfang Shuo's legend was guessed, and it was immediately spread all over the palace, so someone was jealous: Guo Sheren. Calling him a sacrifice is a polite name. If you're welcome, you can call him an advocate. The so-called advocating excellence refers to the artists who entertained people with music, song and dance or acrobatic drama in ancient times. Guo She people belong to the latter and rely on acrobatics to eat. Counting, Guo Sheren is also Dongfang Shuo's peers. can be funny, amusement, and became famous earlier than Dongfang Shuo. But now that Dongfang Shuo suddenly appeared, there was a tendency to snatch his job, and of course he felt ten thousand uncomfortable.

Guo Sheren didn't believe in evil, so he said to Liu Che, "Dongfang Shuo is so crazy, it's just a fluke." Just let me test him again. If I guess again, I would rather take a hundred sticks; If you can't guess, then I'm sorry, Your Majesty, the silk you gave will belong to me" Liu Che also wanted to see if Dongfang Shuo had real skills, so he agreed to this game. The result of the game: Guo Sheren's skills were not as good as others, and he was guessed by Dongfang Shuo, and he was beaten with a hundred boards on the spot, and he was beaten and screamed.