(a)

You say, "July 26 at 9:15 p.m." Pen & Fun & Pavilion www.biquge.info This is the moment when I was born. ”

You say, "Listen to my mother, I was born with only a soft cry." When the doctor cleaned me up and showed it to my mom, my lips explored and searched for her face. ”

You say, "My mom said that at that moment, she felt like her life had changed. She said that once she changed, she would never be able to go back. ”

You say, "I'm 26 years old, and time flies." ”

You say, "26 years old." ”

I look at the look on your face.

I said, "On your birthday, you should always say auspicious things and don't ask inappropriate questions." ”

You say, "It's fine." Whatever you want, you can ask it. ”

I said, "Guidance, isn't anything special going on?" You seem to be ....... today"

You say, "Like what?" ”

I said, "I don't know." I always had a hunch that something unusual must have happened today. ”

You say, "Nothing special happened. It's just that I want to celebrate my birthday and have a special birthday. ”

I'm looking at you. I said to myself, "Is that so? Are you telling the truth? ”

You say, "That's it, it's true." ”

(b)

"However, birth is an illusion." You said.

"When we are in the mother's womb, there is an umbilical cord that connects the mother and the child, and this is how the oxygen and all kinds of nutrients that we need enter our life from the mother's life. On the day we call it a birthday, this umbilical cord was cut. From then on, we have the illusion that we are independent. This is a mistake. We can observe it from our daily lives. ”

"Even after the umbilical cord is cut, we have to rely on our mother for a long time, both mentally and physically. She continues to support us through nurturing and caressing. Her life will still come into our lives and nourish it through her nurturing, her love, her caress and pats, her gentle voice, her affectionate gaze. ”

"In addition to our biological mothers, we actually have many mothers. We actually have a lot of umbilical cords connected to these mothers. It's just that we don't see them there. We have an umbilical cord connected to the clouds in the sky and the blue ocean. At least 70% of our bodies are made up of water. This water circulates in and out of our body, just as our water exchange circulates with our mother's water during the fetal period. ”

"We also have an umbilical cord that connects to all the forests on this planet. We offer them the carbon dioxide they need and enter their lives, just as we pass on happiness, courage, strength and strength to our mothers through small fetal movements. We also depend on them for our oxygen to survive every second. They also permeate our lives all the time. We are interdependent. Like a mother and child in the fetal period. ”

You say, "Heart, have you ever seen the waves?" ”

I said, "Of course." ”

You say, "When a new wave rises, it is not the day on which it is born, but only a continuous day." When the wave disintegrates, it is not dead, nor is there anything reduced or destroyed. When a wave disintegrates, it simply turns into another new wave. ”

You say, "There is no such thing: you don't exist, and then all of a sudden you exist." This way of being born as we think it has never existed. ”

You say, "It's the other way around." You existed, and then all of a sudden, you didn't exist. This way of dying as we think it has never existed. ”

"Nothing exists, it becomes non-existent. What changes is just the way of being. As discovered and formulated by the law of conservation of energy. ”

I said, "Immortal and immortal?" No increase or decrease? ”

You nod your head, and you say, "Neither bego nor perish, neither increase nor decrease." ”

I said, "No one has ever told me this truth before." ”

You say, "Nature has never hidden this truth from us. ”

(c)

I said, "Guide, I love being with you." You can always lead me into a world that I have never known before. Anytime, even if it's a birthday together. ”

We watched the fire together. The light of the fire dimmed, and the flame grew smaller.

You say, "No more firewood." Let it go out on its own. ”

You say, "It's late." Let's all go back to our rooms and go to sleep. ”

I said, "Okay." ”

You say, "Is the extra blanket warm?" ”

I said, "It's warm." ”

You say, "Don't hit the quilt at night." Wake up early and dress more. ”

I said, "Okay." ”

I said, "Go to bed early, you're too tired." ”

We feel inseparable. We sat for a few more minutes at the fire, watching the light in the fireplace flicker for a moment and turn into darkness.

You say, "Go first." I'll watch you go back. ”

I said, "You go first." I want to see you go back too. ”

You laugh a little. You say, "Men should always be at the end." ”

I said, "I don't care. I don't want to leave you here alone. I don't want you to go last. Because the one who walks at the end will have no one to send. ”

I said, "Let's guess boxing." Whoever loses goes first. ”

You smiled and said, "The young and the old are orderly, the teacher is dignified, and there is a difference between men and women." I don't bet with you. ”

You say, "Obedient." ”

You look at me. What is in your eyes makes my heart move.

I suddenly changed my mind. I changed my mind because I was sympathetic to what you were looking for.

I stood up obediently. I said, "Okay, then I'll go first." ”

I said, "Good night." ”

You say, "Good night." ”

I stood still. You look at me.

You smile again. You say gently, "Good night, heart." ”

(iv)

With your reluctant gaze on my back, I walked down the hallway from the living room to the room. My long shadow still casts by the extinguished fireplace. It stretches longer and longer under the night light.

Just as I was about to leave the living room, I heard the voice of your heart.

I turned around. I see you staring at me.

I said, "What do you want to say?" ”

You say, "It's so familiar." When you were my sister, I used to take you back to your room. I watched you walk in, looking forward to seeing you again tomorrow. I've seen your back as you turn away countless times. I used to kneel on the ground and watch you and your husband's car sparkle past me. I rode up to a high hill and watched as your car drove farther and farther away before disappearing into the horizon. I looked at the blank horizon and felt infinitely empty. I don't want to part with you, but I have to say goodbye to you. In this way, when I leave that world, I will be far away from you. You don't have to watch me leave, you don't have to see things that break your heart. I don't want you to see the pain in my life anymore. Even if you resent me for life because of a misunderstanding, I will not hesitate to do it. ”

I said, "How have I ever resented you?" I have been thinking of you and engraved you all my life. ”

You say, "Now, I know that it won't help you." You're still going to be heartbroken. ”

You say, "Now, I'm not going to do that again." You'd like to join me, right? No matter what happens. ”

I nodded. I said, "Yes." No matter what happens, I am willing to bear it with you, experience it together, and face the outcome together. Maybe I won't be doing too well, but I hope to be there for you all the time. ”

You say, "I know." We'll always be together. I will stay with you until ......"

I said, "Until we have a happy ending." ”

You nodded. You say, "Okay." Until the happy ending. ”

You say, "You know, Xinxin, it takes a lot of determination to leave you." ”

You say, "Every time I leave you, or send you off, it really takes a lot of determination." ”

I said to myself, "Then don't leave." ”

I whispered, "There is no such thing as leaving. ”

I said, "My thoughts will always follow you." ”

I said, "Forever." ”

I said, "I don't care if I can see you or not." ”

You bow your head.

Again, you say, "Good night." ”

(5)

These last words of yours have been ringing in my ears that night, or rather, that morning, as I curled up again under the quilt and blanket.

I felt my tears keep flowing down my face, wetting half of my pillow towel.

We, wonderful, Bossan.

It's like paradise.

I mean, the last paradise. (To be continued.) )