(a)

In the same way that lovers feel anxiously distant from each other even when they are close to each other, we were able to be together almost every day, but we still felt that our lives were filled with a lot of separation. Pen @ fun @ pavilion wWw. ｂｉｑUｇE。 ｉｎｆｏ

This sensory separation is like a sharp knife that cuts our lives into sections.

So, when I look back on those days, I never feel the concept of "days go by day by day".

In my memory, time has passed one by one.

Each "day" is sliced into many separate units: the unit that you don't exist, the unit that you exist can only see the unit that you can't talk to, the unit that can only talk to you but not see you, the unit that can talk to you and see you, the unit that can talk to you with everyone and see your unit with everyone, the unit that you don't have to mix with everyone to talk to you, you don't have to mix with everyone to see your unit, the unit where you talk to me when you talk to everyone, You look at my unit when you look at everybody, you don't say anything to anyone else, you only speak to me, you don't look at anything but at my unit, you not only speak to me, you look at me, but you are close to my unit, your hand touches my hand, your breath enters my breath, the unit where we exist in that world, the unit where the world does not exist in our field of vision.

That's how I understood cell.

(b)

In order to resist this sense of separation, we have thought of many ways to do it, as many lovers have done.

Lovers always have infinite wisdom and infinite motivation to achieve proximity to each other. This source of wisdom and motivation is so deep and ancient that they don't feel rejuvenated in the process of being brilliant and talented.

One of the ways we can get closer is one that we thought of at the same time.

Ever since you got me a library card, I've been going to the library a lot.

But these are the moments when I'm often not alone. I was often under guardianship or accompanied.

This would have been a no-go zone for our activities. But then we came up with a way to turn this exclusion zone into a thoroughfare.

The way to do this is that I will inform you of my activities in advance. Then you go to the same library on your own at the time I go. As I sat in that reading room and began to flip through the tomes, you sat down in another reading room in the other building directly across from me. The bright light will project you on a window pane that I can see, and it will also project me on a window pane that you can see.

In this way, we looked at each other and ourselves through the glass of two windows, separated by the distance of a building and the complex geographical environment.

The first time we tried this, it was very successful.

When I sat down in that area with a heavy book in my arms, I found that you were sitting down in a separate building with another book in your arms.

I see you smiling at me on the glass. You quietly made a greeting gesture to me. Then, you turn the cover of the book you're holding toward the glass.

I vaguely saw that it read "Selected Works of the World's Famous Oil Paintings".

You turn the page of the album, and I see an ancient knight in full armor appear on the glass, and I see him riding a war horse with a slender neck, holding a sharp war knife in his hand, and he is fighting a black poisonous dragon that is close to him. He was trying to split the poisonous dragon in half.

You smile at me again, and then you gesture for me to read, and you silently lips me into the glass, "I'm here." ”

But I couldn't reply to you in the same way. Because I heard the guardian next to me cough, and an authoritative voice said: "If you come to read a book, you must read it carefully, and don't always look out the window in a daze." ”

The next day, during the technical instruction time, I asked you what book you were reading at night, and you wrote the title and borrowing number on a piece of paper and gave it to me. You ask me what book I'm reading at night, and I'll write the title and borrowing number on a piece of paper.

The next time we go to the library, we swap each other. I borrowed the one you saw last time, and you borrowed the one I saw last time. Then, when we had the opportunity to be alone, we would talk to each other about what we had learned from reading each other.

We use this tortuous way to satisfy the yearning to read side by side.

(c)

It was under such circumstances that I saw many of your favorite paintings with you.

Later, no matter where I lived, there were always a lot of oil paintings on the walls of my house. I've never told anyone that each of them has carried your admiring gaze.

That's when I found out that you like all kinds of oil paintings.

You're the only one who has a soft spot for it out of all the paintings.

The reason you love it has to do with light.

You said: "Only in this kind of painting can we express the flow and change of light in such a detailed and subtle way, can we see what is called the flying of streamers, and can we see the birth and fading of various colors in the movement and change of light." ”

You say, "When I look at these paintings, I always think of a quote from the Bible." God said there should be light, and there was light in this world. There is no other painting where you can find so much of God's light. ”

"The light that makes the world visible to us."

"The light that I can see."

"The light that makes you appear in front of my eyes on glass."

"The light that separates us from two worlds, but still keeps us company."

You love oil painting because of this light of mercy, and I love oil painting because of your liking.

Although our dating of light soon came to an end, my love for oil paintings, which excelled at expressing light, continued.

It spans your death, it crosses my oblivion, and it shines on my soul all the time.

It's been my lifelong hobby ever since.

Whenever I am confronted with a painting with changing streamers, I see the light that can refract you.

In the years after your death, oil painting has become the window of glass between our yin and yang worlds.

When I miss you, I'm always immersed in looking at all kinds of oil paintings.

I spent a lot of money on paintings, and I did whatever it took to buy paintings, which made a deep impression on many people who knew me. For this reason, how many times have I been commented on as petty bourgeoisie.

But no one knows, that's what I miss about you.

That is the only light that I can see through and see you. (To be continued.) )