(a)

The car jolted violently. The wheels ran over the frozen stones.

Your face is pale. You close your eyes. You lean against the wall of the carriage plank. You reach for the handrail under the window.

I said, "What's wrong?" ”

You're in so much pain that you don't make a sound.

The car thunched violently again. I was shocked to the point that my ribs ached.

The world is spinning, and you can't sit still anymore. You slip to the side and fall to your seat.

"Parking! Stop it! I said.

(b)

I'll wipe the beads of sweat rolling on your face with a handkerchief.

I said, "Don't move." Just lie down like that. Don't spit it out. ”

You can't find the direction of my voice. You're trying to find the direction in which I'm making my voice.

I hold your hand. I said, "I'm here." ”

I hold your hand tightly. Your hands are covered in cold sweat too.

I said, "You follow my voice." I'm here with you. I love you. ”

I said, "I love you." ”

(c)

Wu Shun and Xie Shuangcheng got out of the carriage with you.

You can't move an inch in pain and suffocation. You sit down in the snow under a tree. You leaned on Xie Shuangcheng.

Wu Shun said: "Now there is air, there is a lot of air here, you breathe hard, breathe hard." ”

You fainted in Xie Shuangcheng's arms. Blood gushes out of your nostrils. The snow soon turned red.

I reached out and covered my heart.

I also felt like I was going to die.

(iv)

You breathe. You look at the pine branches covered with snow and ice on your head. A lot of snow dust flew up from the branches of the trees as the cold wind blew it. You feel them fall on your face, on your eyelids, on your forehead. You feel a cold irritation.

The fog in your consciousness has lifted a little. Your mind is so heavy that you want to fall asleep.

"Nope! Don't sleep! Wu Shun grabbed a handful of snow, he patted your face gently, and he said, "Wake up!" Don't go to sleep! He said, "Hold on a little longer, and the medicine will be effective in no time." ”

(5)

The drug took effect. Your face softened.

"Can you move?" Wu Shun asked.

He said, "Let's help you get in the car and lie down for a while, it's too cold outside." ”

You nodded.

(f)

You grab the handrail and sit up. You wearily reach out and press your temples. You shake your head.

I said, "What, does it still hurt?" ”

You say, "No." ”

You say, "It doesn't hurt." ”

In a day and night, this is the sixth time you've used analgesics. Now, it is so fierce and terrifying, it is not at all human power can resist, even such a powerful analgesic, it can only work for 2 hours at a time.

(g)

"What's wrong with the car? Can't you go? You ask.

I said, "When there was a big bump just now, the car was staggered. Now you need to lift the car and go down to fix it, and it won't take long. ”

I said, "Can you get out of the car?" ”

You say, "Yes." It really doesn't hurt anymore. ”

(viii)

We stood in the snow. I looked at the shocking bright red on the snow.

You look at me. You think to yourself, you should take my attention off this bright red.

So, you ask, "Is there any place around here that I can walk?" ”

Left and right replied: "Back to the general's words, on the other side of the woods, there is a very beautiful mountain lake, called Baojing Lake." You can see the lake through the woods. Legend among the Tibetan people says that people who truly love each other go to the lake together, and they can see their future in the lake. ”

You look at me. You say, "Let's go for a walk by the lake." ”

I said, "Okay." ”

(ix)

We stood on a foggy boardwalk. Next to the road is a clear blue lake, and in the distance are snow-capped mountains in the clouds. It is surrounded by snow-covered forests. The four fields are silent and quiet.

You say, "It's a familiar view." It looks like Kiyokawa. ”

My heart twitched.

We walked slowly along the boardwalk. I watched you walk slowly with a slight limp.

Every time you take like this, my heart will be broken, and when my heart is broken, a tiny ripple will appear on the surface of the lake that is as smooth as a mirror, and a small ripple will ripple away.

We walked to the lake. We stood side by side by the lake, at the end of the boardwalk, looking down at the azure water at our feet.

Let's look at the crystal clear water of the lake that encompasses the world and reflects the past and the present.

We see our reflections in the water between the towering trees and the clouds in the sky.

I looked at you. We looked at each other. That's when the reflection began to change.

First, your reflection changes. It slowly turned into a skeleton that had fallen on a boulder in the middle of the river, black foam in the churning of the river, all the skeletons scattered and peeled off, knotted and horizontal, with its head in the center of the boulder, its empty eye sockets facing the sky above. Looking at this strange scene, my heart couldn't beat anymore.

Then, my reflection changed, and I slowly changed into a gray-haired, wrinkled old woman, and then into a skeleton lying calmly as sleep with her hands folded on her chest.

That legend! It's true! You will die in a river. And I have many, many years to live in this world.

We watched in silence at the two skeletons in the lake. We know, that's true. Because, standing on the shore, in fact, are these two skeletons. They're here right now. They are at the moment. They exist in our clothes right now, in our flesh and blood. We are them.

This legend, in fact, doesn't say anything, it just lets us see the truth of the matter.

Will this skeleton in the water still love that skeleton?

When the truth hidden in our bodies is revealed, will we still love each other?

(x)

I said, "All the people who have been to this lake, what they see, in the end, is this scene." ”

All the love that is rotten in the sea, all the loyal love, all the love that is as deep as the sea, all the mutual knowledge and tacit understanding that are rare through the ages, all the love and sweetness, all of them, all of them, the things that countless men and women in the world dream of and strive for, they all have only one common ending. There has never been another ending.

No matter how many poems, how many stories, how many chapters have been written, how many gorgeous processes, embarrassing, admirable, sad and joyful processes, they are all just vain self-deception, and they will all be attributed to the end of this lake at the real level.

That's what we saw together in the lake that day.

This is the outcome that can be known without fortune telling at all. However, we don't want to go at all, and think more about this ending. The real thing is often something we don't want to think about. Our suffering comes from the constant avoidance of reality.

Therefore, it can also be said that our suffering, in the final analysis, is self-inflicted.