When we got home from another way that day, it was late and it was getting dark. I shivered with cold along the way, and my lips turned blue-white. I changed into the clothes you had brought with me and wrapped one of your capes tightly around my body to ward off the cold of the spring night. We rode together, and I sat before you, with your strong arms around me. I feel the heat emanating from you, your clothes with the scent of your youth, and your breath gently landing on the skin at the back of my neck. My heart has been beating rapidly, I don't know if it's because I'm still afraid, or because I'm riding a horse with you, so close.

Halfway through, we met family members who had come to look for us. You let the two of them fly back first to report the news. When we saw the gate of Zhuangji from a distance, we saw our anxious father, with Jingyun and a group of servants, waiting for us there with lanterns. When you saw your father, you and I got off the horse. You walk briskly towards your father. When you walk three or five steps away from your father, you get down on your knees and bow down to your father. My father was so excited that he burst into tears. He hurriedly stretched out his hand to pull you up, and said in a trembling voice, "You're finally back!" It's good to be back! He said, "When you come back, you'll be all right." ””

And just like that, after almost 14 years away from home, you finally returned to our lives.

Your return has brought a new atmosphere to the family that has never been seen before, although you haven't done anything special.

Some people are like that. As long as he is somewhere, he can strongly influence and change the atmosphere there.

This ability is innate.

Before you came back, the Cui family's mansion had always been operating in an orderly manner, with all kinds of people respecting and being orderly, each performing their own duties, quite the rules and bearing of the hairpin family at that time. However, I always felt that something was missing. What is missing, but I can't say. As soon as you get home, I immediately know what was missing—what was missing was the power of a strong sun.

My father is old, and most of the people he uses to manage things are old people who fought with him when he was young. The aunt is in charge of the inner house as a concubine, although her father has nothing to distrust her, but in the end she is not the lady of the main house, and she does not have the status of a seal, and she can't sit on an equal footing with the ladies of other mansions when she goes out, and everything is always a little shorter there, and she herself is not a competitive character, most of the time she is more mediocre and easy-going, and she can't decide things independently. Jing Yun, who used to be the only young man in the family, was an important helper of his father both inside and outside, but he was only a concubine, and his aunt was born as a maid, his mother's family was poor and unmanned, and he himself did not have the qualifications to inherit the title and heir, in the Cui family's noble elders and descendants, he suddenly dimmed, and his personality was more gloomy and jealous, often inferior and resentful, and there was no kind of light that could shine on people. On important occasions, he is often just a shadow of his father, and although he is present, he is invariably ignored. He was obedient and didn't complain about this, but I knew that he didn't think so much in his heart. He actually minded it very much, and he had a deep grudge. His inferiority complex and jealousy have been around for a long time and are intertwined.

As for me, I am an orphan who lost my parents, I was adopted here since I was a child, although the whole family respects and loves me very much, never speaks harshly to me, and never looks the other way, especially my father, who loves me like a pearl in the palm of his hand, better than his own daughter, but after all, he has known since he was a child with a foreign surname under the fence, and he is careful in everything, taking into account the feelings of other people in the family, and does not dare to act willfully.

Since I was a child, I feel that the weather at home is always semi-cloudy and not sunny, no wind and no rain, neither warm nor cold, but it has never been completely sunny and happy.

However, as soon as you enter the door, the whole mansion is instantly filled with brilliant sunlight, and the sky becomes blue and deep. Your youth, health, strength, determination, stability, and perseverance have swept every corner of the mansion like a shock wave.

In just a few days, although you really haven't done anything deliberately, but between your gestures and words, you will reveal the due bearing of the future head of the family, which is not intimidating, but also sunny, so that the male and female servants of the whole family are all in awe of you and obey. That kind of bearing, which comes from within, is inherently endowed, is natural, and cannot be performed, pretended, modest, or hidden.

The feminine atmosphere of the whole house fades away in the sound of your footsteps and loud voices.

I've never seen someone as alive as you before you come back.

Within a few days of your return, I found that my father really had a special affection and concern for you. This same kind of love and care, my father has never given Jingyun. No wonder Jingyun has been so jealous of this since he was a child. As long as you appear in front of your father, your father's eyes are always on you, and even after you turn away, your father's eyes will chase you behind you until you disappear. Father has personally inquired about everything about you, and has seen it himself. Every day as soon as he came home from outside, he would go straight to your yard, and in a few moments his father would be greeted with his father's approving and satisfied laughter. Despite your repeated pleas for thanks, the best things in the house have been moved into your courtyard in a steady stream at your father's behest. You are quite uneasy about this, but you have just returned home, everything is not familiar, and the father and son are still somewhat unfamiliar, so you should obey your father's wishes, make him happy, and not dissuade him too much.

My aunt saw all this, but she was also obedient to her father and didn't say anything. In front of you, she also abides by her duty as a half-servant and half-master, respects you very much, and never reveals the idea of being a concubine. My father didn't mean that at all. In the eyes of your father, although you and your aunt are young and orderly, your aunt's identity is only because you serve your father. You are the master, and her mother and son are servants, and there is no ambiguity or wavering in this. At that time, the distinction between the concubines and the concubines was so clearly demarcated, not only the royal family, but also all the families. Although they have the same father, their biological mothers are different, and the status of their children is clear, and their fates are completely different.

Everyone believes that your father's special love for you is because you have been away from home for many years, and your father has been missing you for a long time and has always felt that he owes you something. At the same time, it must also contain your father's regret and nostalgia for the early death of your biological mother. You are the only sister-in-law she left for the Cui family with her life. What she repeatedly entrusted to her father when she was dying was just you. How could your father not be extra attentive to you?

In your regard, you are thoughtful about all aspects of etiquette, and you have done everything meticulously, and there is nothing to be critical of. Every morning, you will go to your father's place to ask for greetings, then go to the second hall to burn incense and pray in front of the portrait of your mother, and then go to your aunt's place after breakfast. You are also friendly to Jingyun, although you are not close because of the huge difference in temperament, but you respect him, where you should respect.

It's just that Jingyun, who is friendly and polite to you, is completely nothing. He is particularly hostile to you, and has an inexplicable hatred. Although when my father is at home, he lowers his eyebrows and does not dare to reveal the slightest outlet, but as soon as my father and his trusted relatives leave, his hostility towards you will be undisguised. He is the place where he should respect you, and almost all of them don't want to be respected, and when he can, he will definitely collide.

It was only a few days before even the servants of the family felt the atmosphere of discord between your brothers. Although they get along with each other day and don't talk about any storms, there is always a hint of tension that is about to come. Everyone vaguely felt that if Jing Yun kept provoking you like this, you would tolerate it to a certain limit, and you would not let him do it all the time.

One day, my father had something to do and went out early, so I got up early to say hello in advance. When I was going out, the servant woman told me, "You have been with your father first, and he has talked to you about something." As I passed by the second hall, I saw that you had come out of your father's place and had come to your mother's portrait to offer incense and prayer. Seeing you bow down to the portrait of your mother in the half-dim light of the early morning, I suddenly felt a deep pity in my heart.

You are alone. Although you have returned home, you still feel a certain inner loneliness in this seemingly friendly but actually strange home. Some kind of unspeakable loneliness. Loneliness that does not respond to the lack of matching.

I feel this strongly.

It's like a tear that always recognizes another. A kind of loneliness, which can also be quickly recognized, is the same loneliness.

This loneliness in your heart will only dissipate when your uncle Ding Youren appears.

Marquis Ding Youren is your mother's brother and your uncle. The Ding family is also a family of hairpins with deep roots in Lingnan, both in terms of financial resources and power, they are quite strong, and they are not inferior to the Cui family at all. Uncle Ding Youren has been friendly with your mother's brothers and sisters since childhood, and has a deep relationship, your mother is his most beloved little sister, after your mother died, he transferred all this love to you, and is the elder who loves you in the world in addition to his father. Although the uncle of the Ding family married several wives and concubines and had many children, he was a daughter, and although his hair had turned gray, he still had no male heirs. Because of this, his respect and love for you are even more special. He loves you almost as if you were his own son.

After you return home, the happiest person, except for your father, is the uncle of the Ding family. He made a special trip from Linshui to Cui's house to visit his father and visit you much more frequently than usual. Seeing you so handsome and radiant, the joy in his heart is really like overflowing honey, and he can't help but flow out of the smile on his face at any time.

When you were studying in Qingchuan, Uncle Ding Youren was the one who visited you the most. He and you are very familiar with each other, have a close relationship, and talk about everything. Every time Uncle Ding comes, you always feel happy from the bottom of your heart. When you get along, you really fully integrate into the intimate atmosphere of the family, and you will really have the kind of casualness and relaxation at home, and all the deliberately tense heartstrings are released.

I can't help but rejoice for you, and I hope that Uncle Ding can always visit you like this.

And you, to me. You treat me. I don't know how to describe it. Your attitude towards me has always been as if you were on the day we met on the edge of a cliff, and you have unabashedly loved and pity. When you speak to me, the subtle tone of your voice is always different from that of others. You may not be aware of these subtleties. It was almost completely instinctive. My heart is always stirring because of the difference you make.

Whenever your eyes are on me, I feel like I'm bathed in the sun, feeling a warmth inside and out, and even my cheeks can't help but blush slightly. I often feel that you are looking at me. You don't look like you're looking at me, but you're still looking at me. Your eyes are following me. I feel this following. I think it's sweet. I am careful not to touch or disturb this following. I keep my head down, my heart pounding, silently feeling your gaze and following. Because I was so absorbed in your gaze that I couldn't help but ignore the gaze from the other direction.

Jing Yun, also in the other direction, stared coldly at my bow and my silence.