(a)

I said, "After you're gone, I won't be able to contact you anymore?" ”

Mr. Yichen said, "So be it. Once I'm settled, I'll write separate letters to you and your child. I asked, the meditation center in the forest, there is a postman once a month, and the correspondence is still possible. There is no telephone, fax or other services. ”

"In fact, solitary monks also use this way to contact their instructors and receive practical teachings."

Yichen said, "You will receive my letter, if your address has not changed." I'll tell you about life in the forest. However, you don't write me back. You know that I'm safe, and that I'm meditating in the forest, and that I'm a monk, that's it. ”

I said, "Okay." I only read your letters, not write to you. ”

Mr. Yichen smiled and said, "You are really the most open-minded and straightforward female partner I have ever seen." ”

I said, "I'm ashamed not to follow you now." ”

Mr. Yichen said: "As an ordinary man, there are too many interruptions in life at home, and my mood will be affected every day, and my time will be scattered on all kinds of things that do not have much meaning, and there are too many entanglements, and it is very difficult to achieve success. Even if you feel like you can't leave all of this right now, you should know in your heart that living at home is not conducive to monasticism, and keep praying in your heart that in the future, when the opportunity is ripe, you will have the opportunity to become a monk and focus on your practice. ”

I said, "I'll always pray like this." ”

I said, "Sir, I hope to see you come back from the forest in good health." If you can come back, maybe I'll go to Dzongtong Temple to participate in the annual summer meditation retreat. ”

Yichen said, "I'll be back." I will be waiting for you at Dzongtong Temple, along with my son, to come and participate in the Meditation Retreat. ”

(b)

Mr. Yichen said: "I still have some things to take care of before leaving. Today, we can say goodbye. And do not come to see me off when I depart, lest I be shaken by my determination. It's good for the child to send it off. You know, I'm a soft-hearted person who can't see a woman's heartbroken tears. ”

He said, "Well, let's say goodbye today." ”

I said, "Why?" Why so suddenly? I wasn't prepared at all....."

Mr. Yichen said: "Farewell to this matter is never very pleasant. It's just one thing, so why be sad twice? I don't want to make your heart bad again. ”

He said gently: "Compared with many people who suddenly separated without having the opportunity to say goodbye to each other, we are already very lucky to be able to say goodbye calmly, and we should be grateful and content." Attachment is endless, no matter how long you get along with each other, you always feel that it is not enough, and you will only become more and more reluctant when you part. ”

My throat felt a dry choke. He was right.

People who are like-minded to each other will never feel enough together, no matter how long they get along.

All desires cannot be satisfied.

Despite all the partings I have experienced, I still can't control my heart and fluctuate with the situation outside.

It was still blown by the wind outside.

I feel ashamed.

Mr. Yichen said: "In all worlds, parting is inevitable and cannot be changed. The only thing that can change is our hearts. ”

He said: "All love will be impermanent for a long time. Everything that is intimate with us will be separated from us at any time. This is the normal state of the world. Resisting normalcy, refusing to accept it, and not being willing to be unwilling are all futile and useless. ”

Mr. Yichen said, "Do you remember the last recitation we had in small groups? ”

I said, "Yes." ”

He said, "Okay." Let's recite it one last time, as a farewell to this life. ”

So, in the midst of the noise of the bar, under the flickering candlelight, we softly recited the contents of the last evening class together-

"The day has passed, and life has decreased, like a fish in less water, what joy is there. Disciples, etc., should be diligent and diligent, such as saving the head, but the mind is impermanent, be careful not to let go. ”

(c)

In this way, Yichen also left us and went to Zongtong Temple to become a monk.

He meditated in the forests of Myanmar for eight months before returning to Dzongtong Monastery.

After living for three years and two months at Zongtong Temple, he passed away peacefully. After Vida, the ashes were also buried in the tower of this monastery.

He never came back to us.

In the forests of Myanmar, he wrote me 52 letters. I received these letters very late.

The contents of these letters are a story for another book.

I collected them all in an anthology called "The Golden Forest", and published them in Japanese as Mr. Yichen's posthumous works.

After Mr. Yichen left us, he survived for nearly four years, which is nearly four times the life expectancy of the doctors.

It can be seen that his final choice is extremely correct. Becoming a monk has made his body and mind healthier, not more vulnerable.

(iv)

After the death of Zongtong Temple, Mr. Yichen left two relics for me.

One is a photo of him as a monk after he became a monk, wearing a bright yellow robe and holding a bowl in his hand, which is wonderful and solemn.

One is a banner in small block Chinese characters written by him in his handwriting, which contains the famous "Seven Strokes" written by the Ming Dynasty monk Master Lianchi to his ex-wife before he became a monk.

It reads as follows:

"Grace on the hills, five tripods and three animals are not fully paid. Get away from the dirt, and the sub-road will be achieved.

Hey, the big reason for birth, how to dissect all feelings, filial piety and virtuous grandchildren, so to vacuum, so the five-color gold medal is hooked.

When will the phoenix couple be together, when will the love be entangled? The living ghosts stay together, and they break up at the end of their fate.

Hey, for the two of you, take a flail and a pestle, break the enemy, and find their own way, so they will hook the fish and water husband and wife.

The body is like sores and warts, don't worry about your children and grandchildren. Reminiscing about the past Yanshan Dou, is it still today?

Hey, after all, sometimes there is a holiday, there is no queen, who knows how to be a person, the eternal is always the same, so the noble son Lansun is hooked.

dominates the leader, and it is said that the man is proud, and the golden seal hangs like a fight, and the momentum is very long.

Hey, how much in vain, childish face, dreaming of yellow sorghum, there is nothing to smile. Therefore, the wealth and fame are ticked.

Fubi Prince, when you say joy, I am sorrowful, those who seek are more born, and those who win are overwhelmed.

Oh, light rice is better than delicacies, clothes are like embroidery, heaven and earth, why should the building be constructed. Therefore, the family yard is ticked off.

Learn the long flow of the sea, and shoot the bull with the light of the literary array. Walking in the midst of a hundred arts, thousands of poems are drunk.

Hey, the splendid chest is full, why boast, life and death are ahead, it is difficult to save each other for half a time. Therefore, the article of the world is ticked off.

Summer and spring outings, music and dance in the field are dense, smoke and rain are lost in flowers and willows, chess and wine entertain relatives and friends.

Wow! The bottom of the eyes is reckless, and the bitterness is behind him, but it is a pity that the time has passed, and he looks back with emptiness, so he hooks the feelings of the wind and the moon. ”

On the side of this small print, is the learning experience inscribed by Mr. Yichen before his death, a total of nine words:

"After all, there is nothing, there is nothing, there is no gain."

Looking at his last ink, I seemed to hear him say to me in the dark: "Xinxin, this is the truth of all laws." ”

(5)

"After all, there is nothing, there is nothing, there is no gain."

This is the common ending of all human stories.

It is also the only final ending of all stories in the world.