(a)

The shooting team can escape contact by withdrawing, however, physical education class, can not escape the same. Pen, fun, pavilion www. biquge。 info

The gym class that the Browns showed up was the last PE class you ever taught, and the last PE lesson I took as your student. It was also the end of my life's work with sports.

Since then, I have never had any desire to go to the gym class that anyone teaches.

Not only did I no longer enjoy PE classes, but I started to have a great fear of doing them.

In the years that followed, as well as physical education, physical education became my hanging.

My fear reached a creepy level.

If there is a PE class on any day, my heart will be very heavy on that day. From the moment you wake up in the morning, you will feel a heavy guillotine knife hanging overhead. I couldn't help but drag out every step of the way to school and playground like a condemned prisoner procrastinating his way to the execution chamber.

When the bell rang for PE class, it was like a sharp knife stabbing into my ear. And the appearance of the new teacher was like a thick rope hanging down my throat. When the new teacher's voice sounded, I felt like the last step of my feet had been suddenly kicked off, and my whole body was suffocated by strangulation.

Since that last class, my athletic results have skyrocketed. The speed of that regression can only be described as a total collapse. By the end of the day, none of my projects had been able to pass the test.

I could only throw the shot put in front of my feet, I hit the bar of the high jump, I couldn't jump into the bunker, I couldn't drag the javelin, I couldn't run the 5,000m anyway, my 100m took a full 18 seconds to cross the finish line, I fell off the gymnastics machine again and again, I couldn't do even the simplest knee bend roll.

In the semester leading up to graduation, I quickly became a disgrace to the school's athletic performance. I became so backward that in the end no one believed that I would be able to pass on any project on my own.

This almost seriously affected my future in the future.

In order for me to have a minimum qualification to graduate and enter the scope of participating in the provincial joint examination, the school and teachers have thought of a lot of ways. They've opened up to me again and again.

In the shot put event, I was asked to retake the exam 20 times. The last time I took the retake, I think I did my best, but I still didn't get into the passing range.

The new substitute teacher had long heard about what had happened before, and he, like all the other teachers in the physical education department, was full of sympathy for the matter.

He took the tape measure and measured it, but did not say a word. He looked left and right, picked up the shot put from the ground, put it more than 2 meters away, and then took a tape measure and measured it, recording the number in a notebook.

Then, he said to me: "Idealism, you threw it well this time, this project, you passed." ”

When he waved me away, he saw me standing there in a daze. He saw a line of tears running down my face.

He quickly lowered his head, he picked up the shot put, and he said, "I'm leaving." ”

As he passed behind me, I heard him say, "Don't be too upset. ”

That's how all my projects went.

I didn't take the final retest for the 5000m at all. Because the invigilator can't stand that kind of psychological torture. He decided to abdicate his duties and pardon himself and me. He wrote me a passing grade straight away.

By the end of that semester, there was no teacher willing to take over the PE class in our class.

In the end, it was Mr. Xiao Zhou who came up with a solution. Whenever it was her turn to take over our class, she would say, "Xinxin, you are in your menstrual cycle today, and today's project is not suitable for you." You don't have to participate, just go back to the classroom and study on your own. ”

Since she invented it, my menstrual cycle has been extended indefinitely.

So, PE class became a self-study class for my menstrual cycle. I was completely cut off from the field.

(b)

In stark contrast to the meteoric decline in my athletic performance, my academic performance did not collapse, but on the contrary, showed unprecedented leaps and bounds.

The gap between me and the second place in the grade, the second place in the whole group, the second place in the city, and the second place in the province is widening rapidly. In more and more subjects, I almost never lose marks. This is also true of language and politics, which are widely known to be extremely difficult to get a perfect score. I am showing a stronger and stronger trend, and I am very confident that I will get the first place in the provincial examination.

And so it turned out. In this examination, which was the face of the school's rivals, I easily won the championship, which won a special honor for the school, and also won the opportunity for myself to be guaranteed a direct promotion. I can choose the university I want and the major I like.

In this way, I actually graduated from this school when others were still struggling with the college entrance examination.

When I finally graduated from my alma mater, I felt like I wasn't graduating at all, but being released. I feel like a detainee on a life sentence has finally been notified of his release today.

When I got my diploma and was about to leave the school gate forever and never look back, Director Wang was waiting for me at the school gate.

I stood in front of him with my head bowed, and I said, "Director Wang, well", my mind went blank, and nothing could come out.

He looked at me for a moment. He patted me on both shoulders with both hands. He pressed me on the shoulder.

He said: "Life is still a long time, Xinxin, you have to walk well by yourself in the future." ”

I nodded, I couldn't look up at him.

"There's something you may not have noticed," he said. But it has always weighed heavily on the hearts of all the teachers of our entire department. ”

"Since Mr. Brown left, you've never said a word in PE class," he said. You have been silent, silent as hard as a rock. ”

He said: "You don't know how serious this is for the teachers of our department. ”

He said, "Xinxin, you are still so young, I really can't watch you torture yourself like this." ”

He said: "I know that talking to me now is a very difficult torture for you. However, I will say this to you anyway before you graduate and leave. ”

"I know it's not going to work now," he said. But hopefully it will be later. ”

He said: "I hope that one day, in the future, it will melt the ice in your heart." ”

He said, "I know you're going to go far." However, I want you to keep in mind that no matter where you go in the future, whatever you do in the future, you guide, he earnestly wants you to live well. No matter what world his soul is in at this moment, his heart will always expect this. Although, we can no longer see his body image appear, however, you don't let him down. ”

On that day, before parting forever, Director Wang gave me a lot of comfort and guidance like a father. But I remained absolutely silent.

I don't want to live up to his kindness and concern. I just can't say anything.

That's beyond what I was capable of at the time. I've been sentenced ever since. Sentenced to silence.

(c)

My insulations with sports have always continued.

In the first two years of college, I tried my best and endured physical education classes for another two years.

The day I entered my third year of college was my liberation day. The thought of never having to face PE class again in this life made me feel so relieved that I wanted to cry.

I looked at the new semester schedule with mixed feelings, and big tears fell on the schedule.

That was the first time I was able to really breathe after you died.

Since then, I've never touched even the simplest of sports. Even if it's just a little bit of badminton.

I don't even want to watch other people playing badminton.

This strain later became very widespread. I don't play chess, military chess, checkers, Go, skipping rope, hula hoops, poker, I don't watch sports on TV, I read newspapers, I never read sports editions, I listen to the radio and hear sports events and immediately change the channel.

Later, I didn't even get involved in sports-related clothing brands. Then, expand to sports drinks, health clubs, ......

In the end, I didn't even want to see and write the two Chinese characters "sports" anymore. Whenever I see these two words, the image that comes to my mind is always two skeletons stripped of flesh and skin, suspended in the cold wind. They just swayed in the wind, making a clucking sound.

(iv)

Later, I worked, and I traveled a lot.

On the evenings of business trips, colleagues often come over and invite me to play poker. I always say no when I can.

Once, there were only four people on a business trip, three were missing one, and one less could not be played. So, I was forced to sit there.

I sat there with a knife in my heart, like I was in a pan of oil.

An older leader looked at me strangely, and he said, "Xinxin, you've been working for so long, can't you even fight for the upper reaches and trailers?" ”

"You're the only Chinese I've ever met who doesn't know how to play poker," he said. ”

That night, they spent an hour instructing me on what to play.

I don't know how I coping with it. Judging from the current narrative, we know that they are all white religions. Not only did I not learn anything, I didn't even remember the name of what it was.

I was completely in a nightmare that I couldn't wake up from.

This makes me seem lonely among my colleagues.

Once, shortly after I got a job, my unit organized a mountaineering competition. After everyone ran to the top of the mountain, I showed up in a trance for 20 minutes.

Then, I found myself facing a new embarrassment. All of them were either playing poker, or chess, or participating in a hula hoop, or playing mahjong. And I couldn't participate in anything. I could only watch from the sidelines.

Since then I've vowed that I'll never go to any other recreation that isn't my job.

I excused myself for all sorts of reasons. The most natural reason was that when I heard that they were going to do something, I found a place to go on a business trip.

Ever since you gave me my last PE lesson, I've started to decouple from human life. My life and youth ended in that bell for the end of class.

That's when I started dying. After that, all of it was the rest of my life.

I can't exist in life without you. I'm still breathing, I'm still eating, I'm still sleeping, I'm still working, but that doesn't mean that I exist.