(a)

That's all there is to it. Pen ~ fun ~ pavilion www.biquge.info

After reading it, I was silent for a long time, and decided to send an email to the person who posted this article.

I wrote: "I have also seen loved ones turn into corpses before my eyes. ”

After that, we exchanged N more on-site emails.

After about 20 days of emailing, the other party said something in the email. He said he used to study in China and that there was a strange girl at his neighboring school. As soon as he saw this girl, he knew that she must have experienced what he had been through. But he never dared to say it to her. Although he sometimes wanted to say it to her very much.

He said that the girl's grades were very good, and when she read, she didn't care about anything, as if she was crazy.

He said that the girl barely socialized with others, and although she talked and smiled with others, she barely recognized people.

He said that at that time, he always borrowed notes from public classes with this girl, and as he went back and forth, many boys in the class knew about this girl, and they always wanted to ask this girl to dance. They thought a lot about it, and went to ask her out. But no one has ever been able to succeed.

But they succeeded in one thing, he said, and that was that they scared the girl. So, the girl fled like a frightened fawn. She did everything possible to stay away from the crowd and hide her whereabouts. She didn't even want to go to the cafeteria to eat. She always takes some of the simplest food with her and hides somewhere to eat alone.

One day, he said, he saw the girl hiding alone in a dark corridor off the beaten track, sitting on the steps and reading a book with a small rechargeable lamp. She devoted herself to reading the book and wept at it.

When I saw this email, my heart tightened.

I didn't reply to him one day.

He sent three emails tentatively greetings. He nervously said in the email: "Hey, who is that, are you still there?" Have you already acted? Do you still exist in my world? ”

I hesitated for a few days and finally decided to get back to him.

I only wrote one sentence in my reply: Excuse me, are you Nakamura?

(b)

After graduating, Nakamura and I met again on a suicide website.

We talked on the phone. We could barely speak to each other on the phone.

We are so sad about our past in different kingdoms that we can't say anything.

Later, I told Nakamura that until now, I was reluctant to go to the cafeteria to eat. After working for a long time, I didn't get used to eating in the cafeteria.

I couldn't stand to sit with a lot of people and watch each other eat, open my mouth, and send food into that big dark hole in full view.

I don't know what it's for, but I find it unbearable.

That's how we got back in touch with each other. Since then, we have kept in touch without interruption.

I never asked Nakamura why he was on a suicide website at the time. Just as he never asked me.

To this day, as I write this, we have never asked each other why.

(c)

I haven't been to the suicide site since I stumbled upon Nakamura, and I don't know if Nakamura will continue to stay there after that.

Although we kept in touch, we didn't see each other again for a long time until the Canton Fair that year.

In order to report on the exhibition and write a column, I arrived in Guangzhou two days before the exhibition.

On the night of my stay, I looked through the materials distributed by the organizers of the exhibition, which contained several pages of information about Mitsubishi Heavy Industries, which was the project of Nakamura's organization at the time.

So, it occurred to me that I should ask if Nakamura would come to the exhibition.

When I was looking for Nakamura's phone number in my laptop, my phone rang and an unfamiliar number appeared on the screen.

I pressed the answer button, and Nakamura's voice rang inside. He said, "Hey, idealism, long time no see." ”

I said, "Hey, it's been a long time. ”

He said: "I saw on the information that your magazine came to participate in the exhibition, which is one of the designated reporting media of the exhibition, are you in Guangzhou?" ”

I said, "In Guangzhou, it's right next to the venue." I was also looking at the materials just now, which have Mitsubishi Heavy Industries and your research institutes. ”

Nakamura said, "I don't know if you have changed your phone number, so I'll contact you to try it." ”

I said, "I'm looking for your phone number on my phone." ”

Nakamura laughed over there. He said, "Which hotel do you stay in?" ”

I said, "What about you?" ”

As a result, we all live close to the Canton Fair venue.

He said, "Do you have something to do at night?" ”

I said, "Not yet." ”

He said, "Come out for a walk? We haven't met since we graduated. ”

I said, "Okay. ”

(iv)

We met in front of the small fountain in the square next to the venue.

During the exhibition, the fountain pool was lit up. The sound of the water flowing in the pond is pleasant. The whole city is lit up, people come and go, a prosperous scene.

I saw Nakamura in a dark suit and a Mitsubishi Heavy Industries badge on his chest standing there looking around. He also had a roll of materials for the exhibition in his hand.

I walked up to Nakamura from the side and stood next to him for about half a minute.

He was unaware of this, and I saw him continue to look across the road, rolling the information in his hand into a cylinder and tapping it in his palm.

I couldn't help but tilt the corners of my mouth up slightly and smile at his silhouette.

He suddenly felt like he had been stung by something, and he turned around, his gaze resting on mine.

He looked at me for nearly a minute, his eyes full of doubt and confusion. Then, he was finally convinced of what he was seeing.

He took a deep breath. He tiptoed. He lifted the collar of his suit and tugged at his tie.

He coughed and cleared his throat.

He opened his mouth to say hello, but his words got stuck.

I held out my hand to him, and I said, "Hello." Nakamura-kun. Nice to meet you. You're still the same. ”

His lips twitched, and he finally spoke: "Oh my God! You're a fashionista now. ”

He took my hand.

Just as we shook hands, my thin jacket fluttered in the wind for a moment.

Nakamura said: "It's really the eighteen changes of the female university, and when I meet it on the street, I will definitely not dare to recognize it." ”

(c)

"Let's go get something to eat." Nakamura said.

I said, "I've had dinner." ”

Nakamura said, "I haven't eaten yet." Eat a little more with me for supper. Let's not eat greasy and indigestible. ”

I said, "So what do you want to eat?" ”

He said, "Go get some porridge, shall you?" I know there's a nice porridge shop around here, it's not big, but it tastes great. ”

We sat in a porridge shop and ordered a large portion of the first porridge and two small bowls of wolfberry porridge.

When the clerk brought the porridge, the porcelain bowl made a nice sound on the clean table of artificial stone. The steaming aroma hits the nose.

"Another shortbread." Nakamura said, pushing a few plates in front of me, and he asked for several shortbread with different styles and flavors.

We slowly scooped the porridge with a spoon and talked to each other about the exhibition. Then there was talk about work, then about the year-on-year growth of trade between the two countries, then about tariff agreements, then about offshore settlements.

Nakamura chewed on his shortbread and pointed to his profile, detailing the progress of the project part he was responsible for and the current prospects for technology sales.

The porridge is delicious, and the colors of the ingredients are well matched, and the thickness is so thin that you can hardly stop drinking it at the beginning.

The shortbread is also very crispy, and the bite is very good, like a thin ice flake between the teeth that resists a little, and then cracks gently. A warm comfort spreads beneath the skin.

Beads of sweat began to form on Nakamura's head.

The suit and tie made him feel uncomfortable. So, he took off his suit, folded it neatly, and carefully placed it on the seat next to him, and then took off his tie again.

A young, healthy flush rose on his face.

Seeing me looking at him, he scratched his head and smiled.

I looked at him and said, "How are you doing now?" ”

He said, "Good. I'm going to be promoted soon. Now Chinese is good, and it is more popular in the company. However, after the promotion, it may be necessary to be stationed in other regions for a period of time. ”

Then he said, "What about you?" ”

I said, "It's okay, I've been working steadily in the magazine for a while, and the columns I'm responsible for are also more important, and I usually write a lot of things myself." ”

Next, we started talking about this homecoming of Nakamura's Spring Festival. Then he talked about the famous Japanese sumo wrestler Osmankamaru, how the fighter won the affection of many women back then, and so on.

The conversation has been lively. But we all know that we didn't ask what we wanted to ask.

All along, it's been like this. Every time I met with Nakamura, it was like this.

We talk about all sorts of things, but we just can't say what we really want to say.

The words that have never been uttered are, "Are you now free from the shadow of death?" ”