158 If you are good, it is good

"I'm really trying, I've been trying to narrow the gap between us, but no matter how hard I try, how I try to narrow the gap between us, but this gap is like a direct and insurmountable gap between us, I'm trying to build bridges and roads on the other side, trying to get to that side, but their casual words make the gap between us wider and wider." Xiao Yingzi took Zhao Guodong's rough hand and shed tears.

"Dad, is it really that hard for me to get close to them?" Xiao Yingzi looked at Zhao Guodong with tears in her eyes, hoping that Zhao Guodong could open her mouth and say to her, don't be afraid that we will definitely live a better life.

Bai Xiaoju packed up her tray that was knocked over by Xiao Yingzi, and then went upstairs to see how Xiao Yingzi ran in such a hurry, to be honest, Bai Xiaoju really likes this sensible little girl.

As soon as Bai Xiaoju walked to the door, she heard the sound of sobbing inside, and did not open the door directly, but opened the door carefully, and saw Xiao Yingzi looking at Zhao Guodong with tears in her eyes, and also heard Xiao Yingzi's most reluctant words. Bai Xiaoju felt that she should enter the door.

Xiao Yingzi heard the knock on the door and quickly put tears in the corners of her eyes and looked up: "Aunt Bai, why are you here?" ”

"It's okay to come and see." Bai Xiaoju came to Xiao Yingzi and wiped away the tears on Xiao Yingzi's face, "Why are you crying?" ”

"No, nothing." Xiao Yingzi didn't want others to know that she was crying, and Zhao Guodong told him a sentence from the time he was sensible, sweating in front of people and crying behind him. Even if you have a big grievance, you can only cry in your own bed, even if you are weak behind your back, you must be strong in front of others.

"I haven't cried yet, I've seen it all." Bai Xiaoju pulled Xiao Yingzi and said, "Can you tell Auntie what you are crying for?" ”

"Auntie, I didn't cry, I really didn't cry." Xiao Yingzi firmly remembered Zhao Guodong's words, and even if she really cried, she had to pretend to be very happy.

"Auntie told you something." Bai Xiaoju wouldn't say it when she saw Xiao Yingzi, she planned to change her way.

"My aunt is also from the countryside, I remember when I was in college, my classmates were better than me, each of them was dressed very beautifully, I only had a set of clothes made for me by my mother, and a pair of cloth shoes. That set of clothes was the most beautiful in the village, and the cloth shoes were also made for me by my mother from the best cotton cloth, and in order to make these cloth shoes, my mother removed all the quilts at home. ”

"That day happened to be the day of our school's anniversary, and the students all took out their clothes at the bottom of the box, especially the girls in our class, who were so beautiful, and I took out the best and most beautiful clothes that I thought were the best, and they all laughed, not only laughing at me in the dormitory, but also making me ugly in the school auditorium, pulling me directly to the stage, tearing all my clothes, and making me stand there, so that the whole school was laughing, laughing at me unabashedly."

"You know, I was crying at the time, and I took out my best clothes, but in their eyes, maybe not as good as toilet paper." Bai Xiaoju seemed to be telling someone else's story, but Xiao Yingzi knew that Bai Xiaoju's mood at that time definitely didn't matter.

"I swore I wanted them all to pay. I studied hard, I did my best, I became the president of the student union, I got the first-class scholarship of the school, I became the president of the literary club, I founded the first magazine of the school at that time, and I won the national award for the school for the first time. ”

Bai Xiaoju's seriousness revealed that she was so brilliant and proud at the beginning, "I graduated beautifully, and the school even held a lecture for me. I felt like I did it, that I was better than them. Or maybe I was like them, but I was disappointed, and when we had graduation dinner, I went, or I shouldn't go, and as soon as I walked in the door, my classmates started talking about it. ”

"I thought they were welcoming me, but I was wrong, they said that I was a rural bun to do here, and even a few male classmates pushed me out of the door directly, and then closed the door, do you know how I stood at the door and heard the big smile in the room pushing the cup and changing the lamp, what was my mood at that time?"

"I'm just like you, I hate myself, I hate my family, why I don't have money, why do I get so many white eyes? I really didn't know where I was going, although I had found a good job, a good enough life for our whole family, but I didn't go, I was afraid, I was afraid that I would still suffer from that kind of white eyes when I went there, and I returned to Liuzhen in discouragement. ”

Bai Xiaoju took a breath and said: "In Liuzhen, I met the person who has influenced my life, that is, the current dean, I met him at the gate of the hospital, he said, little girls have nothing to be discouraged about, you are not worse than them, they have a lot less things than you, enjoy life, there is no need to care so much." ”

"I really didn't understand what this sentence meant, but when my parents died, I began to understand that I worked so hard to make those who think I am a dirt bun look up to me, but so what, I still have to live, they look down on me is nothing more than my life is better, or no matter how hard I try, they won't look down on me, I still have to live, so why do I have to make them look up to me?"

"I just need to live well, why bother with them, I live freely, I live happily for myself, for my family, why should I compete with them, how good it is to live for myself." Bai Xiaoju stood up and faced the window, opened her arms and closed her eyes. Raising his face to face the sun, he took a deep breath, "Look, what a beautiful life this is, there is no need to lose such a beautiful sky because of your origin, what do you say?" ”

Xiao Yingzi sat there in a daze, thinking about what Bai Xiaoju said just now, and she didn't even know when Bai Xiaoju left.

Bai Xiaoju quietly walked out of the house, and didn't dare to go too far, just stood at the door, preventing the kid from thinking about doing something. Not long after, Lu Fangjun came.

"Why are you sitting here, why don't you go back to the house to sit, it's cold this night." Lu Fangjun said.

"No, I'll just sit outside for a while, and I'll go back when Xiaoyingzi is quiet." Bai Xiaoju said.

"What's wrong?" Lu Fangjun sat down on the chair next to Bai Xiaoju and asked.

"I don't know what to do, anyway, the child came back crying." Bai Xiaoju looked at Lu Fangjun, "Aren't you at school, didn't you see what's wrong with her?" ”

"I don't know what to do, I'm in junior high school, she's not together in high school, I'm saying that today is the Mid-Autumn Festival, I don't have time to see her at all, it's not like I just came over to take a look." Lu Fangjun showed the things he was holding in his hand to Lu Fangjun.

"What is this?" Bai Xiaoju saw that Lu Fangjun was holding two big boxes in his hands, and it was still hot when he reached out and touched it.

"Oh, Xiao Yingzi hasn't eaten meat for a few days, so I bought some and made a meal for her, and I can't be bitter with the child." Lu Fangjun said.

"I really didn't expect you to have this skill, I heard Xiao Yingzi say that you can't cook, and you can't even clean up your home."

Facing Bai Xiaoju's urging, Lu Fangjun blushed again, and said embarrassedly: "This, it's not that I don't know how to cook, it's just that I often do it alone, and sometimes I'm lazy to do it, so I'll just do it a little, but my cooking is really good, I don't believe you can taste it." ”

"Okay then, I'll try it first." Bai Xiaoju opened the box, "Well, it's good, it smells good." ”

"That's for sure." Lu Fangjun said, "You will know the Tao when you taste it." ”

"Xiaoying, it's time to eat." Bai Xiaoju pushed the door open with the box, but then screamed.

Lu Fangjun hurriedly walked over, and then saw Xiao Yingzi lying on the window, half of her body leaned down, and pulled Xiao Yingzi back, "Xiao Ying, what are you doing?" ”

"I didn't do anything." Xiao Yingzi looked at the two of them, "What are you doing?" ”

"You haven't done anything yet, I see you're going to jump, what the hell can't you think of, you're going to do this?" Lu Fangjun looked at Xiao Yingzi sternly, "Do you just want your father to lie here and watch you jump?" Or do you wait for your father to wake up and find that he is the only one in this world, and none of the people he loves the most are around? Do you want him to cry as soon as he wakes up? ”

Xiao Yingzi's tears were about to come down when Lu Fangjun said, and she pointed to the window and said, "I want to wipe my father's face, the towel has fallen, I'll pick up the towel." ”

"Look at you." Bai Xiaoju poked Lu Fangjun and glared. "Your teacher is too anxious, don't take it to heart, go and pick up the towel back, come, Xiaoying, let's eat together."

After eating this meal without embarrassment, Lu Fangjun went back, Bai Xiaoju also got off work, the evening shift was not hers, she didn't go back, she lived with Xiao Yingzi, we don't listen to the chat between the two women, skip it directly.

The Mid-Autumn Festival days are very bland, at least for Xiao Yingzi, it is indeed very bland, she used to be with Zhao Guodong, and this year is the same, but there is no Zhao Guodong cooking this year, and there is no Zhao Guodong telling her stories to the moon in the sky.

All this, for Xiao Yingzi, who is used to being alone, as long as she has her father by her side, she will be satisfied, and it is good to have no other requirements.