Today, it is September 7, and now, in the palace of Thang Long in Cochin, the Empress Dowager Li Shi, Emperor Li Qiande, and the national teacher Li Daocheng are conducting an emergency consultation.

Empress Dowager Li: "National teacher, why are you in a hurry?" Why don't you have a little grace? ”

Li Daocheng: "Queen Mother! What kind of demeanor are you playing, we are all fools, not good! The combined forces of our two countries have been wiped out! ”

Empress Dowager Li: "The whole army is destroyed? All killed? ”

Li Daocheng: "Dead is not dead. ”

Empress Dowager Li: "So, all of them were captured?" ”

Li Daocheng: "It can't be considered a prisoner yet. ”

Empress Dowager Li: "Then how can the whole army be annihilated?" ”

Li Daocheng: "Alas, the Queen Mother! You don't know. On the 4th of September, the general offensive began, and at the beginning, our warriors rushed to the front line, and a burst of fire destroyed the outer city of Xiaojinzuan Yongtian Mansion. Later, the allied forces of the two countries took advantage of the victory to cross the river, burning from the outside to the inside in a circle, and quickly occupied the outer city. The fire burned all the way on, for a day and a night, until the next morning. The next day, our army attacked on all fronts, crossed the river in full, and stormed the inner city of Yongtian Province. After several impacts, the inner city was finally under the assault of my heroic soldiers, the city defense was paralyzed, and all the yamen institutions in the city were also burned. But at this moment, something strange happened, probably because the little golden diamond had done a magic trick, and the war elephants who were charging into battle suddenly changed from warriors to nymphos, suddenly changed from attacking to seeking pleasure, suddenly turned the goal of the tower into the butt of the female elephant, and suddenly changed the war song sung in their mouths into a beautiful love song. As a result, the battle has become a love fight, the battlefield has become a happy field, the encirclement and pursuit have become a Russian lún plate, the righteous army has become a thief, the hussar war elephant has become a playboy, and a visible victory has turned into a soup......"

Empress Dowager Li: "So, what is the situation on that battlefield now?" ”

Li Daocheng: "Queen Mother! Now, the main forces of the two coalition armies have entered the outer city, that is, 200,000 war elephants and 750,000 soldiers and horses are in the outer city. The coaches of the two countries, Wu Liugui and Li Changjie, were also trapped inside. There are also 100,000 auxiliary soldiers on the periphery, all of whom are from Angkor, who have no combat effectiveness, and are mainly people. ”

Empress Dowager Li: "Then, half of this battle is fought, and the playboy is halfway through, so why don't Wu Liugui and Li Changjie evacuate the outer city?" If you can't win, you can choose to run for your life! ”

Li Daocheng: "Queen Mother, the problem is that you can't escape!" After some nymphomaniac war elephants could not compete in the inner city, and starvation, many war elephants also returned to the outer city. A group of war elephants wanted to cross an artificial river only 6 meters wide to come out and feed. Who knows, out of the monster, I was wading in the water yesterday, why can't I do it today? As a result, five or six of the war elephants who crossed the river were trapped in the middle of the river, unable to move, and finally had to lie on their stomachs in the riverbed, screaming in despair and warning of danger. Queen Mother, you must know that we Asian elephants sleep even when they sleep. Therefore, if our Asian elephant lies down, it means that the elephant knows that it can't do it and is going to die in the place where it is lying down. There are a lot of elephants in the outer city, hundreds of thousands. Some of the war elephants saw that the road was impassable, and they prepared to cross the Mekong. Because many war elephants had crossed the Mekong River the day before. Elephants are very smart, and when these war elephants see the terrible situation in the artificial river, they still have the sad cry of the trapped war elephants in their ears, so they are very cautious when crossing the Mekong River. As a result, in the middle of the river, the two elephants that led the team somehow were also trapped, and after several struggles, to no avail, they ended up floating on the Mekong River. Before they died, they also wailed a lot, and the war elephants that followed them also retreated to the outer city after crying about the corpses. At this time, the war elephants in the artificial river have not yet lost their breath, and from time to time there are one or two begging before death, and the sound is very miserable!

In this case, everyone else saw it very clearly and listened to it very coldly. At this time, everyone already believed that they had encountered a ghost, and our army of millions didn't even see the figure of the other party, and we were defeated under the demon law. Everyone has also woken up to the fact that this river loop is a trap, and the river loop and artificial river are a bag for us, and now there is a mysterious magic force in the big and small rivers that hinder us from escaping, and everyone also believes that even elephants can't break through the blockade line, and they will definitely not be able to break through. Therefore, if the stupid one goes up again, it will be sent to death in vain. Therefore, the people in the Hetao are discouraged and have no direction, and they all sit there waiting for death......"

Li Gande: "National teacher, the report I heard is different from yours, saying that the original war situation has been developing very smoothly, but on the fifth day, somehow, the war elephants that were originally working normally suddenly came into heat collectively, collectively calling spring, and those outside the outer city rushed into the outer city; in the outer city. Rushed into the inner city. Beforehand, these war elephants slept all night, and their mood was already a little abnormal and unstable. But, as if there was some kind of trigger outside, the restless elephants suddenly changed from restless to impulsive, blind to unison, and did not want to go crazy with their lives. This, it should be before the coalition forces break through the inner city, right? ”

Li Daocheng: "Oh, Your Majesty, you also know a lot about the battle situation." In that case, I'll just go into more detail. To be precise, Your Majesty, you are right, these nymphomaniac elephants did come into heat before the inner city was breached. However, at that time, their call spring lacked a material basis. Strictly speaking, before entering the inner city, the war elephant's call for spring is only the appeal of the heart's desire, and it is in the stage of only saying but not doing, having a criminal motive, and no criminal practice. And when these hungry war elephants entered the inner city, the situation changed, and the who sang love songs, said and did, and changed the attempted crime into a crime. This, Your Majesty, you know, at that point, you have to love when you die! ……”

Empress Dowager Li: "Li Daocheng! Be careful when you speak! What does it mean to 'Your Majesty, you know', this elephant is a nymphomaniac, how can the emperor understand? Really, old and talking nonsense! ”

Lee Do-sung: "Yes! Be! Be! Damn it! Wei Chen thought that since the emperor could accurately know the time node of these elephant nymphomaniacs, the emperor might also know the reason for these elephant nymphomaniacs. ”

Empress Dowager Li: "So many war elephants will suddenly become nymphomaniac, collectively estrus, sing love songs, and rush to the inner city without shame, it should be something in the inner city that attracts them." Still, come to think of it, it shouldn't be. You think, Xiao Jinzuan, a little girl of fifteen or sixteen years old, has not yet developed well, that is, her facial features are more delicate, this kind of girl, dry and shriveled, thrown into the kiln, the man who can play will not pick her, who has nothing to do to go to sleep with a washboard! And those elephants, the characteristic is just one word, big! So how can she attract 200,000 elephants to sing love songs around her? The body is not concave or convex, and the pork belly can't be pulled out of ten catties, I really can't figure it out......"

Li Qiande: "Queen Mother, how can you talk about my sister like this?" One is a person, the other is an elephant, are you disgusting or not? Alas! Really, at that time, the elephants were crazy all of a sudden, and they would be collective nymphomaniacs at a time when they needed time and no time, and the environment was not in the environment, which was obviously not human. The national teacher just said that it may be the practice of the little golden diamond, which I believe, we all already know that this little golden diamond will do it, but if she wants to make 200,000 elephants listen to her together, how can she do it? Unless, the snake has a snake king, the wolf has a wolf king, and the elephant has an elephant king. Hey, if the little golden diamond is the elephant king, then the matter will be big. As you know, the mount of the Bodhisattva is called the Great Dragon Elephant King. This is the head of the six-tusked white elephant, it was originally the disciple of the Tongtian Sect Master, the Spirit Tooth Immortal, and was forcibly accepted as a mount by Fuxian after the disciples of the Interpretation Sect returned to its original form in the Ten Thousand Immortal Array during the Fengshen period. Xiao Jinzuan is now in this group, including her, Lian Si Seabird, and Lian Hu Erke, there are exactly six people, this is Liuya! If the little golden diamond is the elephant king, what are we doing against her? We went to ask her for shelter, we were too late! ”

Li Daocheng: "Your Majesty, I'm wise now, right?" It's me who has always insisted on not offending the little gold diamond head-on, right? Okay, now that we've reached a consensus that Little Golden Diamond is the Elephant King, we're sure to deny that this battle has anything to do with us, right? Your Majesty, fortunately, this little golden diamond still has some brotherly and sister relationship with you, you see, she established the country this time, and the place she chose actually did not press any of our national borders. Therefore, after the war, your emperor summoned her over, had a good meal, chatted about the house, and decreed the recognition of her Siamese and her as the empress of Siam. In the future, isn't it good that Cochin and Siam, friendly neighbors, peaceful coexistence, and a country of brothers and sisters, go hand in hand, develop together, and build brilliance together? ”

Li Qiande: "Alas, it seems that this is the only way. However, in this way, it is inconvenient for Concubine Song to take it back, isn't it? ”

Li Daocheng: "Oh, the emperor, why do you keep talking about the half-male and half-female Concubine Song!" I went to Ciliuqiu this time, but it was really an eye-opener, Wang Mumu's students, from elementary school students to graduate students, black-haired, red-haired, blonde-haired, blue-haired, brown-haired; There are also black-eyed, blue-eyed, green-eyed, gray-eyed, and brown-eyed; There are also white-skinned, dark-skinned, yellow-skinned, brown-skinned, all kinds of beauties, looking at it, they all feel like they are in heaven, like in the earthly realm, like in the fairy tale world, and like in the overseas fairy mountain, hehe, there is convenience, we asked Xiao Jinzuan to ask Wang Mumu for a few over, okay? ……”

Empress Dowager Li: "Li Daocheng! You're getting impatient, aren't you? Do you want to wreak havoc on the harem? Do you want to introduce red-haired, blue-eyed goblins into Cochin Gongwei? I see you are going back the more you live! Hum! No more nonsense! Come! Let me ask you, how is General Li Changjie now? Is there a way to get him out first? ”

Li Daocheng: "Back to the Queen Mother, General Li is now trapped in the Hetao, and the specific situation is unknown. Wechen is incompetent, and Wechen has no way to rescue General Li alone......"

In the palace, the queen mother, the emperor, and the national teacher are talking. A little eunuch came to report and said that at the gate of the imperial city, there was a living Buddha from an overseas immortal mountain who asked to see him......

The living Buddha from the overseas fairy mountain came to the palace of Jiaozhi to see? Oh, don't be surprised, because, coincidentally, those living Buddhas from overseas immortal mountains not only came to the palace in Cochin, but also to the palace in Angkor......