Faced with the incomprehension of the seven most beautiful mature women in the Great Song Dynasty, and in the face of the trembling anger of the two kings, one Su and one Sima, who are currently in the limelight, Wang Mumu talked eloquently: "There is a well-known story called "Sima Guang Smashing the Cylinder", the content of the story is known to women and children: it is about Sima Guang and several companions playing in the garden, playing hide and seek. A little friend accidentally fell into a tank full of water. When the other children saw that something had happened, they were so frightened that they cried and shouted, and ran outside to ask for help from adults. But Sima Guang didn't panic, he was in a hurry, picked up a big stone from the ground, and smashed it into the water tank, 'Bang! The tank broke, and the water flowed out, and the child who had been drowned in the water was saved, and came out of the big hole that had been smashed out. Later, word of mouth spread that this little Sima Guang had been a little adult since he was a child. He is not panicked, calm and brave, and adaptable; At the critical moment, he used the method of reverse thinking - others thought of getting people out of the tank, but Sima Guang thought of the water in the tank out of the ....... This is recorded in the "Zuo's Spring and Autumn Period": "A group of children play in the court, a son climbs the urn, the foot falls into the water, everyone abandons, the light holds the stone to break the urn, the water bursts, and the child has to live'......"

Wang Mumu glanced at Sima Guang with a complicated expression, and continued to analyze lightly and clearly: "In the story of "Sima Guang Smashing the Cylinder", this cylinder should be the kind of pottery vessel used to store water for fire prevention and fire fighting, the geometric size of this commodity in this era is generally 70 cm in height, about 90 cm in diameter, 3~5 cm in thickness, small below, and large above. In order to reduce evaporation and prevent dirt from falling, it is usually covered with a wooden cover.

As we have said, let's assume that there was a day when a few children were playing in the house of a wealthy and wealthy man. It is said here that this is a noble and wealthy family, which is certain, because ordinary commoners and middle-class families, how can there be a large water tank for fire fighting like the setting in the palace? For small households, a large water tank is also an important asset of a family, how can it be idle to store water and stand there stupidly for a few years.

Okay, go ahead, as mentioned earlier, there are naughty kids who fall in. So, my first question is, this water tank has a cover, how can this child fall into it? ”

Wang Gong, who had always been disgusted with Wang Mumu, spoke: "Hey, this maritime merchant, you don't have a childhood?" When he was a child, the little boy hid the cat and the cat, and the child wanted to hide it in the water tank, can't it? Covered? That, can't be removed? Can't remove the cylinder head and climb into the tank? ”

Wang Mumu interface: "Okay, this adult is good, I still remember the childlike fun of childhood, but I don't know if this adult can still maintain the innocence of the past." Not to mention how this ghostly and obsessed child who is bent on finding death could have removed the cylinder cover and climbed into the water tank with water on his own, but here is the first question, since this child can climb into the water tank from the outside to the inside by himself; So why can't he climb out of the tank from the inside out? You know, there is water in the tank, water can generate buoyancy, and it is easier for a child to climb from the inside to the outside than from the outside to the inside, this is one. Secondly, when the child is in the water tank, the periphery and opposite sides of his climbing point are all borrowing points when he climbs. When he climbed in, the cylinder mouth circle left him alone, and he had no place to borrow on all sides. Therefore, this water tank with a height of only 70 centimeters, he can climb in, and he will be able to climb out! ”

Wang Shu came to help: "Hey, I heard that this child fell into the water tank from the rockery, and he didn't climb into it by himself." Actually, does it matter how the child got into this tank? You maritime merchant, if you want to slander our Sima Xiangye, don't go around in circles, you just say, why can't our Xiangye smash the cylinder? ”

Wang Mumu continued: "Hehe, okay, I don't want to fight with you about whether it doesn't matter or not, and I won't calculate with you how much chance a child can fall into the water tank from the rockery, I'll talk about the doubts when the child enters the water tank." First of all, this tank is very big, and it contains so much water, the pressure of the tank will be very large, how much force does Sima Guang have to use to smash it open? We all know that Sima Guang in the story is only five or six years old.

Secondly, Sima Guang, who smashed the cylinder, must lift a big stone of at least one or twenty catties before he can smash the cylinder. Please think about it clearly, the focus point and direction of this smashing cylinder, this is not a condescending smash to death, this is a horizontal smash parallel to the ground, so, can this Sima Guang smash him? You must know that the cylinder block with a thickness of 3~5 cm is quite strong, even if he is given a big hammer, most of the five or six-year-old children will not be able to smash it. So, don't adjust the head of the gun, don't say anything about changing a small stone, it's hard to break a big stone, is it possible to break a small stone? ”

The great writer Su Shi spoke: "Hey, this maritime merchant. Indeed, in general, it is difficult for a five or six-year-old child to smash open a large water tank. Then why don't you think about it, the cylinder that Sima Xiangye wanted to smash at that time happened to have a crack in its lower part, Sima Xiangye attacked it unprepared, hit its weakest, the stone to the seam, the horse to success, the water tank pierced, the tank water burst out, the prodigy showed God, the wise man showed wisdom, Sima wisdom, thousands of years of circulation. ”

Wang Mumu faced the great writer for the first time, and he applauded his ability to turn agile, confuse the real with the false, and transfer the essence with the literary style, but I have more than a thousand years of cultural accumulation than you, and you can't play with me: "This adult, it's not a big writer, and he can conceive the plot very well." However, I can take you to do an experiment, if the brittle material such as ceramic glass has a crack beforehand, the crack will be magnified under the newly added external force. I want to remind this great writer, please don't forget, the legendary "Sima Guang smashed the cylinder" is Sima Guang smashed the cylinder out of a big hole, you yourself just used the word "hole", the child was drilled out of the big hole. Well, folks, please remember that there is a large ceramic vessel that needs to be smashed into a big hole, and it must not be smashed to pieces or smashed into melon slices, because then it is different from the legend.

Let me tell you, I, a little maritime merchant, used to be very stupid and naïve, and I once believed those propaganda when I was in elementary school; But I was shaken by my belief in the middle school lessons. Practice is the only criterion for testing the truth, and later, I became rich, free, and a little cheap. I prepared 20 large vats, and asked 20 young and old people of different ages to choose any large and small stones from the ground, and asked them to make a big hole in the vats. As a result, the mighty infinity lifted the boulder and smashed the water tank, and I shook my head, if there was my little friend in the tank, if he didn't die, he would have to crush the fracture.

Among the people I chose were three children, aged six, seven and eight. I told them to smash the jar, and they picked a small stone and smashed it, but they saw no holes; They want to change the big rock, but they can't move it, or they barely move it but can't lift it, they can't smash it.

More people use smaller stones to smash the water tank on the ground, split it, and break it up with a large stone, even if the water tank dies and is destroyed, it does not form a hole. And those who have little power, or those who don't want the water tank to be torn apart, smash the water tank out of the cracks, small holes, and water flow out, but they are too far from the big holes that can drill people out. I shook my head, it's a failure, these people can only drain water, not save people.

Finally, after waiting for more than half an hour, a craftsman with curium porcelain backdrop made a big hole in the big water tank. He first carefully carved a small hole, and then gently and gradually expanded the results with skill, and he worked very hard, without stopping, until he formed a large hole that could drill people. It took him a lot of time, because he knew that with great force and force, this vat would be shattered, and it would be impossible to form a big hole! I spun my head to the side. Because, I wanted to nod, but he was the only one of the twenty who could make a big hole in the tank and accomplish my goal, and I should have nodded; But he has spent more than half an hour, I really want to have a friend in this tank, wouldn't I have drowned sooner? So, I had to shake my head. Is it moving up and down, or left and right? My head is at a loss.

When I ordered my subordinates to smash the cylinder, the three little girls next to me came to ask me, oh, they are the three little girls next to me now, one is called Xiao Dongfang, one is called Xiao Dani, and the other is called Xiao Xiangni. They asked me and said, "Boss, why are you doing this?" Such a large water tank is not easy to fire in this era, and the price is expensive.

At that time, I made public the proposition I wanted to verify in my heart, and the three girls rushed to say, stupid! It turns out that your boss doesn't have a grudge against this tank, your boss doesn't have a holiday with this tank, you just want to save people, so why do you have to smash the cylinder? Don't you have a few friends to play with? Won't it be over when you reach out to him and pull him by the tank? If you can't pull it, can't the person outside the tank stand on a big or small stone and pull it? Or can't two people stack an arhat?

Also, you can think differently, you throw a stone into the water tank, and let the people inside step on the stone, can't they climb out? Or find a wooden stick in the garden, such as: a door brace to reach the door, a big broom to sweep the floor, a tow to mop the floor, a bamboo horse that children often play with, a spear and a knife to play with the master's house, etc., and put any of them into the water tank, and after inserting them diagonally, even if the children inside will not climb out on their own, won't the children outside work together to drag the children holding the sticks out of the tank? Let's think about it another way, although this big water tank is big, it must be big at the top and small at the bottom, so its position is not very stable, you won't work together to push it down? Or pry it over with a stick and a large rock like a lever? It's really not good, find an easy direction, and unilaterally remove the soil at the bottom of the tank, like 'the building falls', won't the tank commit suicide?

Also, these children are the second generation of officials, the second generation of rich, they should all have a fixed scholar, attendant, maid, follower or something, so these young masters play together, there must be a large group of people on the side, not to mention that these subordinates are worried that something will happen in the tank, there should also be adults who will worry about whose son accidentally hurts whose young master, don't let the child's unintentional behavior hurt the rules of the adult world. So, how can there be a child falling into the water tank without an adult doing it? ……。 To be honest, what the little girls said is very reasonable, and it is not profound, and I can think of it myself, but I have preconceived ideas, and I have made the elementary school teachers and primary school textbooks rigid......"

At this time, Xiao Shanni interjected and said, "Report to the king-boss, I remembered a childhood incident. When I was a child, my family lived in the urban-rural junction, living in a townhouse, ten families slipped away, and the house type was the same, all of which were through the south front door and the north back door. We have a big river behind the back door, and there are a lot of boats coming and going. My family is in the far west, and the easternmost man is a sinister and arrogant guy, and he received ten large dung tanks from the government in the name of our ten families to improve the environment, and put all ten big dung tanks at the back door of my house. At that time, human dung could be sold for money, and that person took the profit, and the stench made my family smell it. Because this slippery family has somewhat harmed others and self-interest in the matter of whether they smell the stench or not, and they are on the same front, no one pays attention to my family's protest. At that time, I was seven years old, and I didn't like the ten tanks very much, and I always wanted to smash them secretly, but I was defeated again and again, and I never succeeded. Really, this Sima Guang must not have smashed the cylinder, otherwise he would not have come to make up the story of this smashed cylinder, he should have ......"

Wang Mumu was scanning the Baoci Palace, only to see Sima Guang's old face flushed, red and purple, Wang Mumu was a little unbearable, according to the records, this Sima Guang will not be braided for long, history predator, you can't spread this account on my head; Wang Mumu looked at the great writer Su Dongpo again, and saw that his expression was very strange, not at all the simplicity of the current Song people, but full of the unpredictability of the business world in the previous life; Wang Mumu also looked at Wang Shu and Wang Gong, the former was buried in contemplation, and the latter was surprised. Wang Mumu looked at the Empress Dowager Gao and other seven-mature ** women, they were like old Lori in time lapse, listening to gossip with curiosity, Wang Mumu thought, the harem is as deep as the sea, entering the palace is like entering a birdcage, not to mention that now, their Song Shenzong has "died" again, they have all become widows, and there is no place to play. Then, my little carpenter will dedicate it, entertain the public, and entertain yourself.

Wang Mumu was about to have something relaxing, but at this time, Wang Gong, who hated Wang Mumu to the core, said: "Hmph! Businessman, according to you, this Sima Guang smashing the cylinder is pure fiction, is it a fictitious thing? Then, let me ask you, do you know the origin of the place name of Shangguangang Village in the west of Guangshan County, our Great Song Dynasty? You must know that this place name is ironclad evidence that Sima Xiangye once smashed the cylinder. That Shangguan Gang originally had the old toe of the Northern Song Dynasty Shangguan Gang Thanksgiving Pavilion', Shangguan Gang anecdotal rumors said that the Northern Song Dynasty famous minister, historian Sima Guang was a child (Qianxing three years old and seven years old, that is, in 1025 AD) smashed the cylinder to rescue the child surnamed Shangguan, the name Shangguang, Shang Guang moved to the south slope of the Longdi in the west of the city after adulthood, and built the pavilion name "Thanksgiving Pavilion" to repay Sima Guang's life-saving grace. There is also a record in the genealogy of the surname Shangguan who lives in Houguangshan County, and many descendants of the surname Shangguan know the story, and the descendants in order to commemorate this move, so this slope is renamed Shangguangang or Shangguanggang. Feed! Little maritime merchant, what do you explain about this? ”

Hu Dong on Wang Mumu's side is not happy, what is the matter, you are besieging our prince? I'm a talented woman who protects the country, we can't eat this dumb loss, let the prince rest and rest, and let these big men come to fight with my little woman. Hum! If you talk about eight, you can't beat eight women! It's a pity that Sister Rourou is not here, or I won't drown you in the eight seas today, but I will also marinate you in the eight jars and pickle four big radish. Thinking of this, Hu Dong tugged at Wang Mumu's shirt and said, "Boss, are you tired of playing the piano to Niu for so long?" Or take a breath? I'm going to volunteer as a teaching assistant? ”

Wang Mumu thought, this little Dongdong, and the opposite side is not Kaspersky, so you have to work hard? However, gossip palace fighting is a woman's specialty, and if you change your taste, there may be another kind of wonderful. Wang Mumu looked at the seven widows on the chairman, took care of Hu Dong softly, and said, if possible, please try to pay attention to the story and entertainment.

Hu Dong nodded, coughed lightly, and went on the field: "Ladies and gentlemen, adults, scholars, wise men, and talents." He held a small position in the Ship Department of Haihai Prefecture, and had a lot of exchanges with businessmen from the south to the north. I know a version about Sima Guang's smashing of the cylinder and his humble position, but I don't know if Sima Guang in the humble version is Sima Guang's Xiangye of the Great Song Dynasty. After all, now, people's hearts are not ancient, copycat parallel goods, hitchhiking homonyms, counterfeits*, mixed eyes, true and false are difficult to argue, everywhere. 'Wahaha' has 'Wahaha', 'Xueliang Glasses' has 'Xueming Glasses', 'Qiaqia Melon Seeds' has 'Chacha Melon Seeds', 'Wenwang Wine' has 'Zhangwang Wine', 'Wangwang Food' has 'Wangwang Food', 'Xizhilang Jelly' has 'Xizaburo Jelly', 'Mianzhu Wine' has 'Mianzhu Wine', which is true and which is false, consumers, it's hard. As for the matter of Shangguangang or Shangguanggang that the adult said, this is the inevitable development of tourism culture, among them, there is actually a demonstration of the chicken or the egg first. However, to say that, is a bit off-topic. Okay, let's get back to business, let's talk about what I know about "Sima Guang Smashing the Cylinder".

It is said that in a certain year, a certain month, and a certain day, a child named Sima Guang and a group of "second generation officials" and "rich second generation" children were crazy in their backyard in Tokyo. There was a young man named Quail Egg who climbed the rockery and fell into the vat below. The tank is big and the water is deep, and seeing that the little life is about to end, the rest of the "second generation" are afraid of being relied upon, and they are scattered. Xiao Sima had a big mind and a good eye, and hurriedly picked up a big stone from the ground and prepared to throw it at the water tank. But as soon as the stone was raised above his head, Xiao Sima suddenly stopped.

Otherwise, Xiao Sima is extremely smart. I saw that he was small, staring at the big water tank, and his mind thought a lot-

-- This vat has a delicate texture, neat patterns, and excellent workmanship, and is not an ordinary sundry, perhaps it was given to the ancestors of this house by the emperor and the old man. I went down with this stone, and the vat was finished, and the quail eggs and dogs were alive, but my whole family was finished. Do you think, destroying the treasures rewarded by the emperor is not a crime of destroying the nine clans? No way! Scared into a cold sweat. Don't act rashly!

-- Even if it wasn't given by the emperor, it seems that this thing is at least an old antique or an unearthed cultural relic, and if it is a treasure handed down from the Shang Tang period, it must be worth a fortune, and it is a cornucopia that tens of thousands of ingots of silver can't buy. I am also happy to go down this stone, and the house full of silver flowers and silver will all be soaked in the soup and turned into nothing? Stop! Stop!!

-- In the event that my stone falls on the quail's head, the blossoming of this head complicates matters: it is not the son of the dog who drowned himself, but was killed by me. Now that I'm alone, it's hard to tell the truth afterwards, and there is no doubt that the murder suspect is guilty. Can't smash can't smash! Stop, stop!

It is said that this quail cub is just as good as his father, who has no real job. If I rescue him, but I am bitten and insist that I pushed him off the tank and smashed the cylinder as a last resort, then I will be even more tired. Besides, if this guy drowns, and I am framed by his father, won't I be able to eat and walk around? My father still has to pay for the large amount of silver that claimed his life? No way! This cylinder can't be smashed, we have to hurry up and chase the "second generation" to find out who the witnesses are.

-- Even if this large vat is not worth much if it is burned in an ordinary kiln, but there are many carp, goldfish, duckweed, aquatic plants and so on, it must be something that my father loves and cannot be broken. Otherwise, you quail boy is happy, and I was fucking whipped by my father and suffered from flesh and skin, isn't it "losing my wife and breaking my soldiers"? Not cost-effective! That's it! I'll shout for help, too! ……

So Xiao Sima decided very sensibly to cancel the idea of smashing the cylinder, put down the stone and terminated the act of smashing the cylinder. At this moment, fortunately, an old slave who had been in the house for several generations arrived, shouting "Smash the vat", "It is the vat that my father used to catch the rain and water the grass garden, it doesn't matter if you smash it", at this time, Xiao Sima Cai resolutely picked up the stone and smashed it at the tank again.

Everyone knows what happened later: Xiaoguang smashed the tank, the water flowed out, and the quail egg crawled out of the hole like a water chicken, choking and rolling its eyes, but fortunately there was no major problem, only a fright.

Afterwards, in the face of the high-profile praise of the parents of the dignitaries and nobles, Xiao Sima also pushed the boat to comply with the people's wishes, and ignored the internal affairs of the old slaves, and said very modestly, "This is what I should do!" Should do drops! ’

So the sound of 'tsk' was endless: 'This child understands the five constants, is very modest, and is a good seedling', 'Xiao Sima will be the pillar of the society in the future' Yunyun ......"