At the end of the summer when I was fifteen, I left him.

But in my heart, he never left.

I sit on the wooden railing of the Fusu Pavilion every day, watching the summer flowers fall on the branches, watching the autumn geese in the sky, I miss him madly. Sometimes, I even forget that I left him in the first place.

After drinking the residual wine in the Fusu Pavilion, I would always stand stupidly on the official road where the loess was flying, imagining his long sword in green clothes, riding his horse and whip, galloping towards me. Some people are drunk, and they can't control their hearts. I was drunk, and I couldn't bear to miss my bones day and night.

Why don't you come to me? Why didn't you come and pick me up? No matter how you complain about me, annoy me, scold me, beat me, as long as you come, I will go with you, and from now on the ends of the earth, life and death will not leave......

On this official road from the Song Kingdom to the Jin Kingdom, I don't know how many times I got drunk, how many times I cried, and how many times I talked crazy to the clouds in the sky.

But I am not a madman after all, when the sun sets, when the wine is gone, when the autumn wind of the Song Kingdom dries the tears on my face, I will clearly remember every word I said in his ear the day after the marriage of the vow.

"Hongyun'er, don't come to me, one night of affection has returned your past affection. The person I hide in my heart is him after all, not you......"

Sleeping incense, the one in it, within half a moment, is like sleeping and clear. So, he heard and believed the lies I had woven with my tears. The summer flowers had fallen, the autumn geese had gone, and when the first goose-feathered snowflakes fell on a cold winter day, I knew that he really wouldn't come looking for me again.

On the one hundred and sixth day after leaving Wujiao, I went to the official road outside the city for the last time. On that day, the sky was snowing, and I had a high fever that did not go away, and I saw an old man in the bustling wine customers in front of the Fusu Pavilion.

"Are you here to kill me?" I asked.

He stared and shook his head, and he said, "I didn't expect to meet you here." ”

"Oh." I bowed in a trance, turned and went out into the night. He suddenly grabbed my arm, pointed to the brightly lit wine hall and said, Invite me to drink Yuluchun in the Fusu Pavilion, and our previous grievances will be written off.

Alcohol for life? Even if I had a high fever and fainted, I knew it was a good deal.

Fusu Pavilion, the most prestigious restaurant in Shangqiu, the capital of Song, a pot of ten gold, a thousand miles overnight. The Cao Nu of the dead country twisted the qin and drums, the orchids from the north spread their sleeves and danced, the carved Zhu Column, the incense wall coated with pepper, and the Elysium where merchants threw gold and silver. I live in the Fusu Pavilion, I don't dance, I don't sing, I don't raise a glass, I don't laugh, I wash rice and music with ten fingers, burn incense and pray for the full moon, and I make water for wine.

That night, I drank a lot of wine with him, Yuluchun, Zhu Yanxuan, Pressed Sorrow Incense, Qinglian Broken, drunk eyes, I stroked the eyebrows of his right eye, and sighed, why is there no red cloud here.

Since then, every ten days, Chen Yi will come to the Fusu Pavilion to ask me for a drink.

In the twilight, the night goes deep, no matter the wind and snow, there is no violation.

In the winter of the thirty-ninth year of King Zhou, the Zhao family of the Jin State stored grain and prepared the army, the Chen family of the Qi State punished all the dissidents, and in the small courtyard of the Fusu Pavilion of the Song State, two chess pieces jumped out of the chessboard, swept the snow and raised the furnace, and scalded the wine and warmed the cup. A ranger and a wine lady, the huge world will never be lonely because of the absence of two little people.

Chen Wei drank the Zhu Yanyu in the red lacquer duck cup, and gently put the cup on the bamboo and wood table in front of me: "Tomorrow, I will escort a caravan to the Jin Kingdom, if I want to blackmail your wine again, I am afraid it will be after the end of the year." ”

"Oh." I replied lightly, leaned sideways with a square kudzu cloth to pad my hands, took a long-handled copper spoon soaked in hot water, washed the cup and scalded the cup, and poured another cup of white floating for him: "Try this cup again, six years of burning wine with atractylodes, white peony, angelica, rehman, licorice, spicy wine, long meaning, and the right time to drink it on a snowy day." ”

"Okay." Chen thanked him, took the hot wine with one hand but didn't drink it for a long time. Two pieces of Liuling snowflakes connected to each other fell from in front of him, three inches away from the mouth of the cup, turning the snow into water and dripping into the cup.

"This time, the caravan is going to enter Xinjiang City, and the time will be ...... Do you want me to inquire about you? He hesitated for a moment, waiting for a thin layer of snow to accumulate on the small black lacquer canopy above his head before he opened his mouth to ask.

Xinjiang City ......

I felt pain in my heart, but a faint smile appeared on my face: "This is the Fusu Pavilion, go out from this small door, and you can hear the news of the north and south through the two curtains." If I want to know any major events in the world, I will know them every day by standing behind the curtain for a moment. Where is the need for you to travel all the way to deliver news for me? With that, I lifted the sleeve of my jacket and leaned over to take a small piece of pine wood from the firewood pile on my right, and gently put it into the copper stove at my feet.

Chen Wei glanced at me and said in a muffled voice: "It's me who said too much." ”

In the past few months, I have never asked him why he left Qi, and he never asked me why I left Jin. Indeed, he has said much today.

Chen Wei bowed his head and said nothing, and I only looked at the copper furnace with blue rust in my ears at my feet. The pine blocks in the copper furnace were scorched with ugly skins by tongues of fire, and crackled and crackled.

"I'm going to leave early today, and I can't come in the next two months, so I'll chop a few more pieces of firewood for you tonight for the winter!" Chen Wei raised his head and drank a full glass of hot white floating wine in one gulp, and stood up.

I lowered my eyebrows, reached out and took the cup he was resting on the floor, and sinked into the hot water on the side: "There is a small man chopping wood in the Fusu Pavilion." ”

"It's okay, there's always something to do when you drink your wine." He smiled sparsely, unsheathed his sword, and lifted the hem of his sleeve.

This night, the wind and snow were blowing. Chen Wei braved the goose feather snow and chopped two stacks of half-person-high firewood for me before quietly leaving the wine garden.

I propped up the wooden window and looked at the snow that was getting thicker and thicker on the pyre, and my heart, which had been empty for a long time, suddenly gave birth to a trace of emotion.

If you want to refuse to accept his affection, you always have to do some work......

In the early morning of the second day, it was snowing. After I left a book to the owner of the Fusu Pavilion, I went out and hired an ox cart and a coachman, and staggered away from the Song capital all the way to the east to the Ailing of the Qi Kingdom.

On the outskirts of Ailing, there is no snow in winter and the grass is overgrown. In the wilderness, the loess is cracked, and white bones are scattered everywhere. From a distance, it looks like piles of unmelted remnants of snow on the cold plain.

These 100,000 white bones have been beaten by the wind and rain here, crying miserably for more than a thousand days and nights, and it is time for someone to send them away.

I lit the soul-sending lamp, chanted ancient witch words, and walked round and round the wasteland.

The weather was cold and wild, and everything was slaughtered, and in just one day, my cheeks were frozen and my lips were broken.

On the 10th day of Ailing, I sang the witch words for ten whole days.

On the tenth day, the wind began to blow, and it snowed heavily.

The vast world, the bones are disformed.

I wiped the blood from my lips and blew out the soul-sending lamp in my hand.

Twelve-year-old me, the first time I read about Ailing's fourteen-year-old me in the secret newspaper, met Duanmuci's fifteen-year-old me who caused the Battle of Ailing, and promised Chen Yi to send away the souls of the 100,000 Qi soldiers before the age of sixteen, I finally fulfilled my promise.

I stood on top of the vast snowfield, and a thought suddenly occurred in my heart.

Perhaps, my soul really set foot on this land in a dream. Perhaps, all the way from an orphan girl to a sorcerer, all the fate of the meeting, just to be able to come here and sing a requiem for these 100,000 white bones.

Everything in the world has a beginning and an end, just like the love in my heart.

From the State of Qi to the State of Song, it was difficult to travel in the cold, and the passage was one and a half months, and when it came to Shangqiu, the end of the year had passed.

The ice and snow outside the city are beginning to melt, the green mountains are green, and the treetops that have left time and space have burst out with new sprouts the size of beans. Winter goes to spring, and it's another year. There are many unfair things in the world, but the years are fair to everyone, whether you want to or not, it will always drag you forward without hesitation.

After the New Year, the most important thing in the Song Kingdom is the spring festival of the new year. At the gate of Shangqiu, ox carts carrying ritual utensils and fine wine slowly walked out of the city through the central gate. The people who had survived a cold winter carried their burdens and led their children to squeeze into the city through the side gate on the side. Old, immature, beautiful, ugly, the smiling faces around me make me feel more and more lonely at the moment, I don't feel the joy of spring, and I can't laugh.

Entering the city gate of Shangqiu, I bowed my head to avoid the lively crowd and went all the way to the Song Taishi Mansion.

Last year, a failed war eventually led to the fall of the Song Xiang clan. After the brothers Xiang Wei and Xiang Chao left the Song Kingdom, Song Taishi Ziwei became the most important minister of the Song Dynasty. In the past in the Jin Kingdom, Shi Mo and Yin Gao both mentioned this person to me. Yin Gao said that Zi Wei is good at astrology and hexagram interpretation, and is known as a demigod. Shi Mo said that Ziwei is talented and likes money, but he can't become a big thing. And after I arrived in the Song Kingdom, I learned that Song Taishi Ziwei was still the owner of the world-famous Fusu Pavilion. More than half a year ago, he was the one who trapped me in the Song Kingdom.

On that day, I left Wuxian in a daze, and I wanted to go all the way to the Chu State in the south, but when I passed through the Song Kingdom, I fell ill on the streets of Shangqiu. I was sick for a few days, groggy, and when I woke up again, I had already entered the Taishi Mansion. In the Song Dynasty, there was an unwritten rule that if a person from a common man received a great favor from a nobleman, he would be sold into slavery in return. I am a concubine with no identity, and Ziwei, who saved me with medicine, happens to be one of the most powerful people in the Song Kingdom, so after I recovered from my illness, the people of Taishi Mansion took it for granted that I was a slave in the house.

At that time, I was afraid that Wuxian would come to me. Even if he doesn't come, he will definitely send spies to find out my whereabouts. Therefore, I simply signed the deed of sale and hid in the Taishi Mansion as a slave.

In order to hide from someone who would not be looking for myself at all, I sold myself like this. Now that I think about it, what a stupid and ridiculous decision it was.

Fortunately, Ziwei is a man who loves money and keeps his word, and as long as the slaves in his house earn him a hundred gold in his lifetime, he will burn Danshu 1 and go with him. In the past six months, I have made more than 100 gold for Ziwei. Today, I'm going to get back the Dan book that sold me and set off for the Chu State.