I stood behind him, listening to his dreamy voice, and my heart was full of mixed feelings.

Too much had happened this night, his ruthlessness, his indifference, maybe just to protect himself.

I walked down the steps barefoot and stood beside him: "Red Cloud, the moon belongs only to the night, I am not afraid of the dark, but I also do not want to live in lies and deception. ”

Wuxian turned his head and looked at me intently: "No, when you see me clearly, you can't wait to run away from me." ”

"Tell me, what else have you done?" I didn't want to be suspicious of him, but when I asked this sentence, countless thoughts suddenly turned in my mind, and the doubts that had been pent up for a long time swirled in my head.

I felt the fear, and when he opened his lips to me, my hand was firmly on his mouth: "No, don't say it tonight!" We...... You have to calm down first. ”

"Don't you dare to listen to it?" Wuxian smiled wryly and squeezed my hand.

Yes, I am cowardly, I am withdrawn, I long for the truth, and I am afraid of the truth. I was afraid that the doubts in my heart would come true, and I was afraid that I would break my promise again.

"I'll go see Si'er." I pulled my hand out of my shirtless palm, turned around and picked up the hem of my skirt and rushed down the steps.

I'm a deserter, and always have been.

"Si'er, Si'er - Yu An opens the door!" I stood in front of the wing door and slapped the door hard.

"Ah Shi, why are you up? It's still dark! After a long time, Si'er opened the door wearing Yu An's robe.

With messy buns, red cheeks, fingers clutching the collar, and bare calves under the robe, I looked at Si'er in front of me and was suddenly stunned. The room behind her was lit up, and it was warm, and there was a faint special smell lingering in the warm air.

My face flushed, and I took two steps back.

"Ah Shi, what's going on?" Yu An flashed out from behind Si'er, his hair was scattered, and he was wearing only a thin plain bedgown.

I can guess what happened in this room tonight. I looked at the two of them, I wanted to laugh, I wanted to be happy for Si'er, but I moved the corners of my mouth but I couldn't smile.

There was still the corpse of the servant lying in the room between me and the shirtless, and there were countless unspeakable secrets between me and the people I loved. At this moment, I suddenly felt terrible, and I was so embarrassed in front of their happiness.

"What the hell is wrong with you? Why aren't you wearing shoes, Mr. Zhao? Si'er turned back to the room and put on his single clothes, and rushed out quickly and pulled me into the room at a loss, "It's still dark, why are you up now?" But you quarreled with Zhao Wuxian? Did I upset the general when I was drinking last night? Si'er sat down on the small table in the middle of the room with a worried face.

"Ashi, what's going on? You don't look good, but what's wrong with you? Is he still drunk without shirts? Yu An handed me a glass of water with concern.

"No, he's awake. We ...... "I grabbed Si'er's hand, and I just wanted to throw myself into her arms and cry, but looking at her and Yu An's faces, I suddenly couldn't move. Same people, same room, but after this night, I felt that everything was different. I sat in the host's room like a restrained guest, and I recklessly intruded into the world of the two of them like an outsider.

I let go of Si'er's hand and instead grabbed the bamboo cup on the desk hard: "I'm sorry, I woke you up before dawn." ”

"What a stupid thing to say!" Si'er knelt up and crawled to my side, hugging me tightly with both hands, "If you don't want to say it, I won't ask, but you know, no matter what happens, I'll always help you." ”

Si'er's hand gently stroked my hair, I buried my face in her warm embrace, and my eyes were sour for a while: "Si'er, you died and killed him without mercy......"

"What do you say? Zhao Wuxian killed the eldest brother! Why! Si'er's hand in my hair froze, "This can't be!" The eldest brother is in the Qin country, and we are in the Lu country, and there are thousands of miles between them? Si'er grabbed my arm and dragged me out of her arms, "Are you drunk and sleepy?" ”

I looked at Si'er with a stunned look on his face, and shook my head in frustration: "I also wish I was just drunk and had a nightmare, but the corpse of the servant is now lying on the floor of my room." He went into the house and stabbed him, and he killed him. ”

"Is the shirt hurt? What about you, have you ever been hurt? Yu An found a trace of blood on my chest and squatted down nervously.

"I'm fine, there's a lot of blood on Wuxian, but I guess there's no blood on it."

Hearing this, Yu An breathed a sigh of relief, got up and put on his robe: "Si'er, take care of Ah Shi, I'll go and see Wuxian first!" He pressed Si'er's shoulder, and sped out of the room with his long sword.

"Ah Shi, I don't understand, the eldest brother has been guarding the Qin State with the general all these years. Did he know Zhao Wuxian? Is there a grudge between them? Si'er grabbed my shoulders and choked up.

"They...... Si'er, there is something I haven't told you, even from the general, I have been hiding it. ”

"What's the matter? But has something to do with Big Brother You? ”

"Hmm. That year, you returned to Pingyang with your family to visit relatives, and a major event happened in Yongcheng. At that time, the crown prince was still alive, and he met the Assassin at his birthday banquet......"

Yu's death evokes memories that have been sealed in my heart for a long time. That year was the last year I lived in the General's Mansion, and that year Wu Feng left me and walked into my life without shirts. I gently picked a protrusion on the bamboo cup with my fingernails, and told Si'er in detail how I met the beast-faced man outside the workshop, how I designed to frame the Yao girl, how I helped Wu Feng clear the suspicion, and how I later learned about You's heart.

Si'er was still sad at first because of the death of Youyu, but after hearing this, she was already stunned by the twists and turns behind the incident.

"Are you saying that Zhao Wuxian is the beast-faced man, and the eldest brother will kill him to avenge Yao Nu after he finds out?"

"Well, you swore in front of the grave of the Yao girl, saying that she would avenge her by the beast-faced man, and then cut himself to make amends to the general. Actually, I saw him once on the streets of Feiyi, when he was wearing a hat, and I thought I was the wrong person. I didn't expect him to find out Wuxian's identity, let alone the marriage between the general and the Zhao family. ”

"The eldest brother may have known who the beast-faced man was for a long time, but because Mr. Zhao was a member of the Zhao family, the general had to marry the Zhao family to endure it all the time. Now, the marriage has been blown up, and he has the heart to die and chased him to the country of Lu. ”

"But if Wuxian hadn't killed him, I could persuade him to go back to Qin. After so long, the general wouldn't have wanted him dead. ”

"Silly Ashi, the general may forgive him, but I want to ...... Maybe at the beginning, he was the only one who couldn't forgive him! Si'er let out a sigh and sighed, "But I really didn't expect that the person Yao Nu likes would actually be Mr. Zhao...... Ah Shi, when did you know that the beast-faced man was Mr. Zhao? ”

"The days we were in Zhifu. After I knew that Zhi Yao was not a beast-faced person, I began to suspect that Wu Xian had deliberately misunderstood Zhi Yao by using white sandalwood. "The Zhao clan and the Zhi clan are mortal enemies. Back then, Wuxian planned to assassinate the crown prince and marry Gongzi Li, in order to cause civil strife in Qin and prevent the Qin army from attacking Jin. It was naturally good that his plan succeeded, and in case it failed, he was ready to blame the hatred of the Qin people on the Zhi clan. When the Qin State Office rejected the Zhi clan because of the assassination, the Zhao clan could take the opportunity to make an alliance with Gongzi Li. In the first battle of Yongcheng, Qin owed the Zhao family a favor again. Although the plan was ruined by me, at the last moment he used a sprig of white sandalwood to win a bigger victory. I sent peach blossom brew to get a word out of his mouth, but I was used by him. Now that I think about it, our first acquaintance was full of calculations and lies.

"Ah Shi, are you blaming Zhao Wuxian for killing you in the first place?" Si'er's voice pulled me out of the memories of the past, and I squeezed her hand and lowered my head: "No, we were enemies at that time. In order to stop the Great War of the Three Kingdoms of Qin, Jin and Wu, he just did what he had to do. ”

"Then are you blaming him for killing Big Brother Yu? Would you rather the big brother kill him? ”

"No, of course not. I just think he should at least give Yufu another chance, and he should at least feel guilty about Yao Nu's death...... Si'er, he shouldn't be like this, although he hides his good side well. But I know that he is not a hard-hearted man. He is a man of affection, just as he does to Ah Yu and to everyone under him. We fled all the way from Linzi City to the country of Lu, and he remembered the sacrifice of each and every one of them. But the words he said tonight, the look on his face when he killed him, made me feel like I almost didn't know him. ”

Si'er shook my shoulders and forced me to lift my head: "Ah Shi, I really don't understand what you're thinking. Do you prefer that Zhao Wuxian still likes Yao Nu and thinks about Yao Nu? ”

"I didn't mean that, I ......" Si'er's words forced me into a corner, and my mind was in a mess, and I couldn't find anything to answer her for a while.

Tonight's Si'er was a little surprised to me, under her long eyelashes, a pair of almond eyes were a little less sparkling and innocent, but a little more calm and deep. I glanced at the messy bed, and then looked at her thoughtfully. Overnight, she seemed to be a different person. Could it be that this is the difference between a girl and a woman?

"Ah Shi, maybe I don't know as much as you, but I know that Zhao Wuxian is the only person he likes. You weren't there the other day, and you barely saw a smile on his face. Not to mention the fish woman, even Ah Yu and I don't dare to talk to him. But when you came back, his whole body was like a layer of ice. And the way he looks at you......" The corners of Si'er's mouth twitched slightly, and the lowered eyelids removed the light in her eyes, "If one day, Yu An can look at me like this, I am willing to die." ”

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