My name is Ash, it's not my real name, and in fact, I don't care what my name is.

The thin girl in a wheelchair looked out the window, and the flickering birds outside the window were her only dreams.

No, she has a special illness, and her eyesight is declining every day, and the birds outside the window are just a gray shadow flashing at high speed in her eyes.

Her world is gray.

When I was in kindergarten, the principal was an amiable fat uncle, who would always give the big guys some snacks and take those beautiful children to the office to help with their homework.

But then, before it was my turn, the amiable fat uncle was taken away by the police officers in the town, and I still remember the angry parents who surrounded the fat uncle that day...

I don't really want to talk to other people my age, because there's really not much to talk about.

My mother has taken me to various hospitals for check-ups, and "autistic tendencies" is the word I hear the most.

But I don't feel like I'm autistic at all, I have a lot of good friends at home.

Great White Bear Doll, Clock Superman, Uncle Lamp, Gemini, and .....

The misfit seems to have become the focus of the bear children in the class.

They stuffed little pieces of paper into my eyes and between my fingernails, and it hurt a little, but someone was always playing with them, didn't they?

But after a while, I realized that my eyes couldn't see things very clearly, so I refused to play the game.

Those friends were upset.

When I got home and told my mother, she was just very angry and dragged me to the teachers and the parents.

Mom is like an angry lioness, roaring at every enemy she sees.

However, it didn't work out very well.

The next day, the teacher's eyes changed when he looked at me, and those friends seemed to be angry too, saying that they had been taught by their parents and wanted me to taste it.

I don't understand.

Later I changed schools.

I went to another city and met my father, whom I hadn't seen since I was born.

A man with a scruffy beard but handsome.

At the time, I didn't know what handsome was, but everyone said so.

All I know is that my mother cried and then we lived together as a family.

When my father came to pick me up at school in a car, it was my happiest time, and my classmates were very envious, and even the beautiful female teacher who taught Chinese secretly asked me about my father's news.

But the good times didn't last long, my mother often quarreled with my father, my father's car was gone, and the family house was changed.

Later, Mom and Dad separated, and people said they were divorced, but I know that they were never married.

When I was in junior high school, there were many boys who liked to come near me and write me things that didn't make sense.

They sometimes invited me out to hang out, but I only went once, and when I came back, my mother gave me a lesson.

I began to learn to say no.

I don't know if it's because of the problem of stuffing pieces of paper when we were young, or if we study too hard, our eyesight has been declining until we wear glasses.

They said that I was more beautiful like this, and the teacher often said that I was the mascot in the class.

Although I don't like this word, since everyone is happy, then I am happy too.

One afternoon, I was caught in an alley by a group of girls with hideous expressions and insulting words, and I knew they were cursing.

It seems to be related to a certain boy, but I don't know who it is.

I was beaten.

It's the first time since I was a child.

The shattered lens got into my eye and I ended up in the hospital.

According to doctors, the good thing is that the lenses are made of resin, and they are not too sharp when they are broken.

It's just that from that day on, my view of the world became more blurred.

Mom seems to be in a lawsuit with that group of people.

We got nothing but some insignificant money.

For the first time, I understood what it meant to be a "minor".

I changed schools and became the new mascot with my outstanding appearance.

There are still boys who send me something, and I use the "refusal" I have learned to reject them.

At the same time, study hard.

Because my mom told me that as long as I did well in my studies, they wouldn't come to me for trouble.

Mom has been coming back late lately, and I found out that she was still in contact with the man.

Yes, "that man", Mom won't let me call him Daddy.

Every night, the most common thing I hear is my mother's muttering as she settles accounts.

It seems that because of that man, the conditions in our family are getting worse day by day.

My big white bear doll is gone, and my mom says that the grown-up girl doesn't need such a childish toy.

However, she didn't buy me mature toys either.

Mom seems to have made a fortune.

It was the weekend, and she decided to take me on a road trip!

I don't know what the point of this is, I prefer it to the outside.

In fact, I made the right choice.

My mother didn't seem to have driven a car for many years, and the new car seemed to have a problem with the brakes, or someone had tampered with it, which was later told to me by the judge.

As for who, I still don't know.

At that time, all I could see was my mother's frightened expression when she ducked from the cat that suddenly jumped onto the road... As well as oncoming trucks.

The last time I saw my mom was in the hospital.

The man told me that she was gone.

The man adopted me.

Oh, I forgot to mention, the doctor said I was lucky that the airbag caught me completely, but my legs, which were stuck in the flattened patch, were undoubtedly not so lucky.

The man said that he had limited abilities and only fitted me with a prosthetic leg that kept the aesthetics, but he couldn't move normally and had to sit in a wheelchair most of the time.

For the first time, I felt that the world was very unfair.

The man was married to another woman, and I should call her... Stepmother? Stepmother?

She started to treat me well, after all, judging from daily life alone, my stepmother's family was relatively wealthy.

I have an older brother and a younger sister, all of whom are children of my stepmother.

My brother is very good to me, it's just that his eyes are terrible sometimes.

Younger sister... She was a naughty fellow, and always liked to call me lame and blind, and my brother would always reprimand her.

When she looked at me, I saw a different emotion in her eyes, and the girls who used to beat me also had this kind of look, and then I realized that it was jealousy.

I don't understand why she should be jealous of me, of a cripple, of a "blind".

There is a wonderful family, a comfortable environment, countless toys, and a large group of friends......

I didn't go to school because of my health, my stepmother hired a tutor for me, and my studies continued.

I don't know why, Xu has a nanny to take care of me, and my stepmother didn't give me a new power limb.

Maybe it's expensive, so I just thought about it casually, and it's a good life, but without my mother.

Besides......