Returning to the village is gratifying, but also sad. The familiar paths, the trees that have passed through the years, and the courtyards without human figures, all seem to be vicissitudes, and an old smell invades the heart. Only the summer wind, with a trembling voice, drilled in and out of the mountain village, and the grass and trees waited in the withered yellow. Walking with the farmers in the summer is not necessarily refreshing, but with expectant eyes, looking at the distant mountains. I have been walking this road since I was a child, and time has made me step on crow's feet. I know the only people I know, just like the grass and trees, stubble after stubble. However, I still think about it, carefully take a clue to the village, there is my family's old house, there are parents in the old house, and I am also a piece of grass in the village. Here, people live like plants and trees, and plants and trees live like people. Every plant and leaf has the imprint of our ancestors growing on it; Everyone's voice and smile are hidden in the charm of their ancestors. I think, I can't help but think, in the breeze, they are not as magnificent as the waves, but they are painted with the inherent colors of the village; Wheat in the summer, yellow-orange-orange is intense, the sun is like the enthusiasm in the fire, with the "sweat drops under the soil" to test the endurance of the lingering millet grain, the sparrow can't wait to peep on the tree, as soon as the sun is exposed, stepping on the heavy millet ear, the dummy on the side is discouraged; When the artichoke shows up proudly, it is white and sexy and shows its naked body. My parents were already waiting for me at the door, and I could see from their eyes that they were very melancholy and even more helpless. After all, I will be an unemployed young man. A young man who doesn't know how long he has to stay. The days at home are so long, even I don't know if I can persevere, and I feel that I should find something to do, relax myself, and say relax, but in fact, it is just to free myself.

Of course, after returning to the village, I often thought of her, and the best way for us to communicate with each other at that time was through letters. However, the correspondence with her changed from one letter a week to one a month. From the words that I couldn't finish writing before, I have nothing to write. Others say that the distance is slowly fading. I didn't believe it before, but now I know. Feelings are inherently fragile, and distance makes them even more fragile, which is a problem that must always be faced. Slowly, we got in touch less and less, until we didn't have any more contact. After graduation, I have been at home for more than half a year, and my job has not been confirmed, although my parents have not said anything, I am also nervous. It's hard to sleep at night, it's hard to sit still, and meditate: the former friends didn't go to college, and they worked hard in the society one step earlier, but they also made a lot of achievements, and their lives were good; And I, the road ahead is tortuous, and at a glance, there is no end in sight. Three years ago, my friends congratulated me; Three years later, I was jealous and hated them. I have to say, it's not a small irony. In the past three years, what I have gained and what I have lost, whether what I have gained and what I have lost is directly proportional, I dare not compare, I am afraid and complaining. The ideal is very plump, the reality is very skinny, and the beautiful fantasy after graduation has become the moon in the water and the flower in the mirror in the face of reality. Rather than reaching out to your parents at home, it is better to go out with both hands to support yourself, I think a college student to work in the factory is not a shame to throw home, if a person wants to walk with his head held high, he must first learn to bend down, the factory has a relatively perfect well-being, get by and get by, save money on weekdays, and save some money every year, three or five years later in some of the investments that have been calculated in their hearts, this idea is not very exaggerated. There is no way, the parents can't solve the unhappy knot, thinking that the so-called top students of the university can't go to the factory and bury themselves. Rather, trade their connections for me a present that they look like. This path may be able to be left and right to move forward step by step. But, this is not my future! In my future, I shouldn't be **, while I am young, I should pack my bags and break through! Tired will not tire people who rely on their hands to death, and opportunities are also for those who are prepared. For a while, it is difficult to gain the upper hand in the judgment with the parents. Another month passed, and one night my father said to me, "Tomorrow you can take me to the bank on your bicycle to withdraw money." "I remember my mother told me that now there is only 20,000 yuan left in the family, which is the bride price for my brother to marry his wife. Now they're going to take that money out and get me a job. When I came back from the bank, my father stood on the bed and counted the money, looking at the wrinkles on his hands, and looking at the hundred-dollar bills, I just felt very sad. That night, my cousin and I brought money to a deputy head of our township. We went to his house in the evening and sat for a while, and my cousin said:

"Cousin, that's what I told you last time, my cousin, he graduated from college and majored in business administration. It just happens to be professional, too. ”

"You can help!"

"Oh, yes, I told you last time, but now there are several people who are graduating this year who are eyeing this position, and everyone is relying on the relationship and going through the back door, which is a bit difficult now. Besides, now there is no distribution, to put it bluntly, they are all looking for jobs through the back door. It's a good job, it's easy. Now I can only wait a few days, and I'll take a look at it for you. ”

"It's a little bit of a trivial matter, you take it first, you help take care of it, then we'll go back first."

For the rest of the time, I had to wait, and my parents were also waiting, waiting for the good news to come, and it was almost half a month. My cousin came to my house and said that the son of a relative of the deputy county magistrate had found the personnel bureau and arranged for him to be assigned directly.

"If you don't do anything, you have to return the money." I say. To be honest, at that time, I was reluctant to take 20,000 yuan to find a relationship.

"Okay, I'll go to my cousin's house in the evening."

The next morning, the money was returned, and the moment we received the money, we obviously felt that it was less, and we clicked on it and only had 15,000 yuan.

"Isn't it twenty thousand, why is it only fifteen thousand, and five thousand less?"

"Oh, yes, my cousin did, but he took five thousand dollars from it to buy cigarettes, alcohol, etc. The matter was not done, the money was returned, but the cigarettes and alcohol bought could not be returned from others! ”

"My cousin said, don't worry, if there is a chance in the future, I will give priority to you." That's it, my cousin, happily left, but 5,000 yuan is a year's income for our family, and nothing has been done, and there is no money. From my cousin's hideous laughter, I wondered if he had taken the money himself.

Seeing that my friends and classmates around me have jobs, I actually feel quite depressed. Especially when acquaintances meet, they always ask, "Have you graduated, have you found a job?" I can't wait for my parents to help me find a job, I have to find a job myself.

"Dad, I want to go to work in the township enterprise next door."

My father still didn't agree, and said, "Wait a minute, I'll find someone to trust you and have a state-run unit." "And so, I waited another month, but I still didn't find a job. I've been thinking, this isn't my future! In my future, I shouldn't be **, while I am young, I should pack my bags and break through! Tired will not tire people who rely on their hands to death, and opportunities are also for those who are prepared. Slowly, the judgment of the same parents has gained the upper hand, and they have reluctantly accepted this reality. It happened that there was a nearby township enterprise recruiting workers, so I went for an interview, and everything went smoothly through the interview. Said he could go to work next Monday. I went to the workshop and the so-called my office that day to have a look. Too far from what I expected, too far away. The so-called one-room office for me, you don't need to experience it, it's a place that's cold in winter and hot in summer. The dust on the fan no longer makes people see that it is a fan, and it is only when it is rotated under the drive of the power supply that it feels windy, and then the dust can't wait to drift around. I think it's a lack of experience, oh, not a lack of experience, because I have no experience at all, and as a result, after a week of work, I remembered that I didn't even ask what my monthly salary was. And at the beginning of the interview, I also said that I would just stay in the workshop for a week, and then go to the office to work on the design. (I have to point out here that I can be a mechanical graduate for three years) and then I do stay in the workshop and even spend most of my time working on the machine. This, I, my body, where can I stand it, and I can't stand it. Back pain every day. Once, dragging my tired body, I went to the supervisor and said. My supervisor is a workshop manager, and you can't believe him to be a manager if you don't see the advantages of his proficiency in operating the machine and the quality of the product. And according to the factory personnel, he is also a very good manager. This is what it means to say that a man must not be a disfigurer. I walked up to him and said to him, "Director, what I came for an interview is different from what I am asked to do in the factory now." He smiled and said, "There is a gap between theory and practice. In our line of work, especially you designers, no matter how good the design is, if the front-line work cannot be operated, it is equivalent to a piece of waste paper. Therefore, I still let you stay in the workshop for more time, and the theory must be combined with the practice. Such a theory is valid. "I'm speechless, what can I say, what will I say, I have to stay in order to live, to survive. That's three months. Three months later, I received my first salary of 273 yuan. The actual salary should be 370 yuan, if you want to buy daily necessities or something halfway, you can go to the commissary in the factory to get it, no cash. After the accounts are kept, they are deducted from the salary. Later, I learned that the proprietress of the commissary was the daughter-in-law of the factory accountant. It is said that the proprietress of the commissary married his family at that time in order to take over the commissary (because the accountant's son is a fool, however, this fool is a little different, he just takes things into the house and never gives the house to others). On the other hand, she can let her brother work in the factory. The proprietress of the commissary laughs when she sees people, of course, her smile is not the kind that ---- will be swaying when she laughs when she sees people, and the kind of lover will be over the wall in the middle of the night. Her laughter is greed for money. I kind of admired the location of this commissary--- everyone had to pass through the door of the commissary to get to and from work, which greatly increased her business income. At the same time, it is also due to her very good business acumen.

"Boss, is the latest Yilin here?"

"Hey, Yilin hasn't come yet, why don't you buy readers, the content is pretty much the same anyway"

"Well, the reader doesn't care about Lin interesting, then forget it, I'll come back tomorrow to see"

"Okay, I'll leave you a copy tomorrow if there's a new one."

"Well, it's not a scarce commodity...... "Although I think so, I still do

He smiled and responded, "Then thank you, hostess."

The proprietress was a middle-aged woman who looked quite young, medium to thin, and since there was an attic in the commissary, I thought she would have lived here. Every day I happily sat at the cash register, watching us workers go in and out one by one, as if we were moving money printing machines, because she was always very enthusiastic about recommending her various stocks, and once I was even "tricked" by her to buy a novel book that I had hardly touched since. I really have to admire her eloquence, and I always feel that she is really condescending in this commissary.

I couldn't stand it anymore, I was still working in the workshop for the fourth month, I had put forward no reason and made many excuses, but the workshop director still said to let me stay in the workshop, at least every process of the products produced in the factory will be actually operated. Where can I stand this kind of torture, especially now that it's winter, and the glass of the window is broken, and I have reported to the General Affairs Department many times, but still no one has repaired it. The weather was unusually cold. The northwest wind blew from the window like a knife in my face, the dead branches squeaked weakly, and in my last struggle, I stomped my cold and numb feet and walked towards the workshop director's office......