As the saying goes, "There is nothing in the world, but mediocrity disturbs itself." ”

Don't be idle, it's not that we should hide in a snail shell and shut the world out, or that we should sweep the snow in front of our door alone, and it's better to keep quiet among friends and family. Some people in their lives always treat what has not happened as what has already happened, and impose on themselves things that have nothing to do with them, thus adding ineffective troubles to themselves and others.

One day, a young man came to the psychiatrist, and he said to the psychiatrist: "The most unfortunate thing in the world happened to me: my girlfriend got married, and the groom was not me. I attended her wedding, and the bride was so beautiful that day that she was distressed, her eyes were shining, as if there were tears. I haven't seen her since, and I haven't heard anything about her. I think she must be unhappy because she didn't end up marrying the person she loves the most. She may already be regretting her rash choice by now. ”

When the young man said this, the doctor asked, "Sounds like you love her very much?" ”

"Yes, doctor."

"You said she wasn't happy now, did you listen to her?"

"It's not. But I believe so. ”

"Young man, all your troubles stem from assuming that she is unhappy. Since it's just a hypothesis, you can also assume that she's happy. ”

It's true that because of the thing you are worried about, or because of someone, the situation may not be as bad as you think, so your worries and worries are superfluous, or sometimes the things you are worried about are long gone. If you worry about it now, there is no point in it, you might as well just let it go and not think about it. Only in this way can you enjoy true happiness in life.

In everyday life, unsatisfactory things often happen. For example, if you eat at home, the dish is likely to be salty or light, not to your liking. A person who can think openly, eat less salty dishes, and put some salt when it is lighter, and it will also eat deliciously. For those who are angry, they will feel that the food is unpalatable, and they are not happy. Obviously, they are exaggerating the trivial things. Therefore, idleness is mostly self-inflicted.

Lao Li and Lao Tong are neighbors across the wall, Lao Li has seen Lao Tong endure a lot of hardships and blows for most of his life, but he has never seen Lao Tong angry and troubled, so he is very strange in his heart, and he always wants to find an opportunity to ask for an understanding.

One day, Lao Li passed by Lao Tong's sect, he stopped and asked Lao Tong, who was basking in the sun: "Lao Tong, I really don't understand, everyone says that you are the most bitter and miserable on this street." For example, your eldest son is not in good health, he is hospitalized all day long, he is in debt, his second son is laid off again, and he relies on odd jobs to earn money to support his family, and his daughter spent tens of thousands of yuan on college in the province. But I see that you are happy all day long, why don't you feel annoyed at all? ”

Lao Tong glanced at Lao Li and said, "Lao Li, what you have heard is the truth, but I have never been concerned about those things, although I believe in the existence of those things that have happened." Lao Tong smiled gently at Lao Li and continued: "But none of this will make me complain. I'm always grateful for these troubles. Because of my troubles, I have a clearer understanding of the situation around me, so I try to find a solution to the same problem. At the same time, I deal with my troubles with a friendly attitude, because that's the only way to deal with them. Only then will we be able to recognize the true face of our troubles, face them squarely, and negotiate conditions with them. ”

Speaking of this, Lao Tong smiled more gently and kindly. "All the time," he said. I've worked hard for my own hopes, for my sons, and for my children and grandchildren, and to work to make every day of my life so fulfilling, so what else can I worry about? ”

Don't be idle, there are three harms to being idle:

(1) Harming one's own body. If this negative emotion occurs frequently or repeatedly, it will inevitably affect the normal physiological function of the human body, resulting in psychological imbalance and decreased immune function, and a variety of diseases may follow.

(2) Harm your own career. Bad emotions not only affect the efficiency of work or study, but also hinder the relationship with superiors and colleagues and affect unity, which is not conducive to career success.

(3) Harming others. When angry, he often has a rude attitude or makes disrespectful remarks, which destroys the mood of others and blows their hearts. When people are idle, they are prone to venting, looking for "punching bags" and other offensive behaviors, such as making evil noises, falling and beating, glaring angrily, scolding, and beating people. These aggressive behaviors may be directed at the creator of frustration, but when they realize that the other person cannot attack directly and the evil anger in their hearts is about to vent, they often find a "punching bag".

Indeed, as long as we face up to our troubles and do not worry about ourselves, we can gradually attain inner peace.

The old idle person should ask himself: Am I being too careful? Or too boring? With big goals in mind, big things in mind, and something to do every day, you don't have to count trivial things and get angry. Therefore, I advise you to strengthen your self-cultivation, treat others generously, and do not blame others or yourself, so that you can be smooth, eat and sleep well.