By David

It's a name that you earthlings should always remember.

Although the whole incident was an accident.

You know, it's hard work to be an interstellar cop, catching criminals, evacuating traffic, helping kids...... You can't go to the hot springs, and you can't go to the KTV...... David is no exception. But like all the other interstellar police, he also hopes to take a chance to desert or something, such as leaving the black hole of interstellar space to lie down on the grass of a planet and look at the blue sky and white clouds above! Wow, what a wonderful idea! Ever since David had been passing through Earth frequently on official duty, he had been staring at the blue-green planet more than once.

The opportunity finally came, David once passed by the earth when he was about to carry out the task of telling a story for the traffic light star aunt, David thought to himself: What an inconsequential task, I should still play on the earth!

I can't help but say that David jumped off the spaceship like a little child, what a beautiful meadow! Roll a few times, kick a few balls, run a few times, take off your uniform, throw away your batons, and swim in this beautiful sea! Dancing with the sharp-toothed dragon and playing with the mermaid, he backstroke, breaststroke, backwardstroke, butterfly stroke...... Let the warm sun shine on your face and let the clear blue sky reflect on you...... It's so cool on earth!

But the unexpected happened in the end, and a few monkey warriors with sticks secretly saw this scene, and they stole David's uniform and electric batons!

Just as the group of naughty monkeys were complacent, a fierce tooth suddenly attacked them, and one of the monkeys instinctively raised the electric baton in his hand, and the fierce tooth dragon was electrocuted in an instant! The group of monkeys were jumping around the fragrant carcass of the Spirited Tooth, and they didn't know how happy they were!

On David's side, it was just the opposite, he was about to go ashore but found that his clothes and electric baton were gone, and he was so anxious that he kept saying, "Zeus! Zeus! (In interstellar language, it means 'hell')"

The monkeys also saw it, and they also learned to call "Zeus".

When David saw this group of monkeys, he was immediately angry, but how could he be embarrassed to get out of the water without clothes? In the end, David thought to himself: no one here wears clothes anyway, and no one laughs at them. So he rushed out with all his might, but the group of monkeys disappeared into the dense jungle in the blink of an eye! David shouted, "Greece! (In interstellar language, it means 'broken')"

In the end, David had to ride a motorcycle away from Earth, hiding in Tibet along the way and being taken thousands of nude photos by interstellar reporters, and finally he appeared on the cover of interstellar magazine. Not surprisingly, David was fired harshly due to image problems, and he rushed into the KTV and sang for a few days and nights.

Originally, this matter was over, but one day 2 million years later, a complaint brought the old David to court for the reason: he was suspected of tampering with the historical process of other planets! David was suddenly furious, it was really out of nowhere! However, several pieces of evidence provided by the police station made David stunned in his chair.

Evidence 1: Someone ** the whole process of David on earth.

Evidence 2: A large number of photographs show that countless extinct megafauna on Earth have been electrocuted to death, and the current used is the MK3 solar current used by the interstellar police.

Evidence 3: Greece is one of the earliest birthplaces of earthlings, and the local residents are crazy and obsessed with Zeus, the god of thunder and lightning, and the naked sports of the ancient Olympic Games.

Evidence 4: There are now more than 6 billion people on the earth, and they have become the masters of the earth.

David was incredulous, and after much negotiation, the court finally agreed to allow David to personally visit the earth to verify whether the crime was true.

So David dressed up as a 15-year-old boy and snuck into a middle school on Earth. He wanted to ask the local students about history and evolution. But because he was old and his brain was not good, he was scolded by his classmates countless times as "peasant", "countryman", "countryside" (the English word "countryside, countryside" means "old-fashioned, unseen here"), etc., so that he wanted to take out a laser energy gun and shoot them more than once! Finally, one time, he couldn't take it anymore and he was about to pull out his gun! And that's when our protagonist Alex happened to meet him. Alex felt pitiful for him, so he put his arms around him and whispered, "Actually, I don't think you're rural at all!"

It was Alex's short words that saved the students in this class from being wiped out, and also prevented David from continuing to make big mistakes! After David was imprisoned in the intergalactic prison, he has been thanking Alex.

Hey, Alex is Alex, he accidentally saved the lives of the whole class, and he really deserves a good compliment, so let's continue to focus the camera on Alex.

After Kevin said his "can't", there was silence at the scene.

Andrew suddenly said, "Nothing. ”

Alex said, "Andrew, how can you say 'nothing' at this time! He turned to Kevin and said, "Why can't you send us back?" ”

Kevin said, "Because I don't have the keys. ”

Alex dusted his tongue in annoyance and said, "Can you go into more detail?" ”

Kevin said, "Okay, I'd like to send you back too, but the only way to do it right now is to reverse the Molecular Teleporter. But I don't have a key now, so I can't operate the machine, which is why I can't turn it off. ”

Alex and Andrew looked at each other and said, "Do you know where the key is?" ”

"Of course I do." Kevin pressed a button as he spoke, and a large window opened in a wall behind Alex, and Kevin pointed to the distance and said, "The key is there!" See that colorful neon-like waterfall? There is a pot of plants next to it, and the key is pressed under that potted plant! ”

Alex looked at the waterfall in the far distance and said, "Oh, can you help us get the key?" ”

"No, because every time I try to enter that area, the sign at the door always says 'No Entry,' so I have to ask for your help," Kevin said. ”

Alex said, "What? That door won't let you in? Then we ......"

Kevin said, "I guess I can, I've sent a couple of guys who look like you into the area, but none of them have come back yet." ”

Alex and Andrew looked at each other, and Alex asked, "Why?" ”

Kevin said, "Because my master has kept a lot of strange monsters from the earth, like Tyrannosaurus rex, arrow-toothed tigers, and horned eagles, and they all like to eat you without exception." ”

Alex and Andrew slumped in their chairs.

"That said, we're going to have a long way to go before we go home......

Andrew said, "And the road was full of ferocious beasts......"

Alex asked, "How long is that stretch?" ”

"It's about 300 kilometers from the entrance to the waterfall," Kevin said. ”

"300 km!" Alex exclaimed.

Andrew said: "Nearly 8 marathons away! ”

Alex let out a long breath.

Kevin said in a tentative tone, "Actually, you don't have to go back......

"Huh?" It's a nasal voice for two people.

"I mean, I'm not going to force you if you don't want to go, because forcing wild animals to do dangerous work is also a violation of the Wildlife Protection Act," Kevin said. ”

Alex said, "But if we don't get the key......

Andrew said, "Then we're stuck here!" ……”

Alex said, "yes, if we don't get the key, we'll be stuck on the moon and can't get out!" Maybe he'll die on the moon! ……”

Looking at the panicked look of the two, Kevin narrowed his eyes and said, "You guys...... Would have stayed here......"

"Live here?" Alex and Andrew spoke in unison.

"Haven't you seen it yet?" Kevin said, "It's a city ......."

"City ......," Alex muttered, "we're going to live in a city inside the moon?" ……”

Kevin suddenly became a little annoyed for some reason, and he said, "But to be honest, I really don't want you to live here!" I wish you lived well on Earth......"

Before Kevin could finish speaking, there was a sudden roar of the engine. I saw that two humanoid robots with shiny bodies actually landed here with fire on their backs, and their body movements were very smooth. They turned off the engine behind them, then bowed to Alex very politely and said, "The system has detected that two new residents have arrived, we are your exclusive robot servants, now please press your fingerprint to make sure the target has been obtained." With that, the two robots stretched out their hands to Alex and Andrew, respectively, with a square sensor on their palms.

Kevin said in a helpless tone, "Look, how smart these robots are! Before I could say anything, they flew by themselves...... Now all you have to do is press your fingerprints and they will take you to your abode......"

Domicile? Alex and Andrew wondered if they had heard it wrong, and Alex hurriedly said, "Wait, wait...... If...... We really stayed here...... Wouldn't that be ...... for us? What causes...... Loss? ……”

Alex felt that the word "loss" was far from fully expressing his fear of living on the moon.

"Losses?" Kevin muttered, "Oh, that's just a little bit, you just have to let me modify your data a little." ”

"Data?" Alex and Andrew said at the same time.

Kevin said, "yes, but don't worry, I'm just going to change one small statistic, please put the helmet on now." ”

As soon as he finished speaking, two robots put two helmet-like things on Alex and Andrew's heads, and Alex felt at least 10,000 electrodes touch his scalp.

Alex said, "Excuse me, what is this thing for?" ”

"Don't worry, the computer is analyzing your brain data, and it will take some time," Kevin said. With that, Kevin crossed his legs, and then shaved his leg hair with something.

Andrew also felt an itch in his leg, and he lifted it up and scratched it with his hand.

Alex said angrily, "Now is not the time to do that!" ”

Andrew said, "Oh. ”

Alex said, "What the hell is Kevin trying to do to us?" ”

Andrew said, "I don't know, just ask him." ”

Kevin suddenly stared at the screen and shouted, "Ha, your name is Alex George John!" ”

Alex said, "yes, that's my full name. ”

Kevin said, "Why do you have so many 'Kelly' words in your data? ”

Alex said, "That's my girlfriend's name. ”

Kevin said, "Look, whose picture is this here and there?" Kevin twisted the screen around.

Alex said, "That's Kelly. ”

Kevin said, "Oh wow, this house is beautiful!" ”

Alex said, "Oh, that's my old house. ”

"You like frozen cream cakes, fruit salad, lentils and beef ......," Kevin said.

Alex said, "Oh. ”

"You also enjoy swimming and ball games," Kevin said. ”

Alex said, "Oh."

Kevin said, "Your favorite animal is the female stick monkey warrior. ”

Alex said, "Oh. ”

"Extremism 27, low self-esteem 35, emptiness 20, selfishness 32, impetuousness 27, suspicion 15, cheerfulness 75, loneliness 30, shyness 41, jealousy 22, revenge 14, rebellion 65, narrow-mindedness 11, nostalgia 52......"

Alex said, "Oh. ”

Kevin said, "Don't worry, I won't look at your privacy folder, it's unethical." ”

Alex habitually said, "Oh. His eyes widened.

Kevin said: "One thing I wonder, there was a time when your pessimism was 100, what was going on? ”

Alex said, "Oh. ”

Kevin was speechless.

Kevin turned to Andrew and said, "Andrew Dean King." ”

Andrew said, "It's me! ”

Kevin said, "Who is Lucy? ”

Andrew said: "My first wife. ”

Kevin said, "What about Sarah? ”

Andrew said: "My second wife. ”

Kevin said, "What about Jody? ”

Andrew said: "She is my current wife. ”

Kevin said, "What about Julie? ”

Andrew said: "She was my neighbor. ”

Kevin said, "Why are the names of the four of them so intertwined and twisted around? ”

"Because that's what they are in real life," Andrew said. ”

Alex looked at Andrew in surprise.

Kevin said, "Hehe, again, I won't look at your privacy folder, I just need to open your IQ folder." ”

Alex and Andrew said, "IQ? ”

Kevin said, "Yes, your IQ is too dangerous, and in order for you to live well here without any damage, I have to tune your IQ to a harmless one." ”

Alex and Andrew said at the same time: "Harmless? ”

Kevin Lord: "Yes, zero violent IQ. ”

Alex asked, "How much is that?" ”

Kevin said, "75. ”