63, Zhang Lili's exchange (3)

Zhang Lili smiled at me and said, "I've been hungry for a long time, let's go eat." ”

I said to Zhang Lili, "Seriously, I am very willing to chat with you, chat with you, every time I grow a lot of knowledge, know a lot of things I don't know, let's talk while eating." ”

The two of us came to the cafeteria, because now the winter vacation has begun, the cafeteria seems to be very deserted, most of the undergraduate students have gone home, the number of students has been reduced by half, the remaining master's and doctoral students, there are many people who fire in the dormitory, there are very few people who come to the canteen to eat, the usual bustling crowd, now it has become sparse, so that the two of us are more relaxed when choosing food, and the good things we want to eat every day need to queue for a long time, Now that there was no one in front of the food stalls, we ordered a few stir-fried dishes and sat down in a corner of the cafeteria, chatting aimlessly while tasting the food.

I asked Zhang Lili, "Are many international students returning to China now?" ”

Zhang Lili said to me, "We are now studying abroad, all countries in the world, but there are more ASEAN countries, these countries themselves are the Oriental cultural circle, and we Han people also attach great importance to the Spring Festival, and they also have this habit to go home for the Spring Festival, so most of them go home for the New Year, those students from Western background countries, there is no concept of the Spring Festival, because this year's winter vacation is longer than every year, and the Spring Festival in 2015 will be in mid-February. A month's vacation can allow them to do a lot of things, especially during the Spring Festival, tourism is very popular everywhere, take this opportunity to travel all over the country, understand some customs, is a rare opportunity for these international students, so most of them go to travel in groups, like me There are also some people who want to travel abroad. ”

I said to Zhang Lili, "Our national culture is too thick, up and down 5,000 years, so that our culture has become our body's genes, some memories may have been obtained from heredity, during the Spring Festival to go home for the reunion year, the leaves fall back to the roots, this is the tradition of our nation, but also a part of our culture, all the Oriental cultural circle influenced by Confucianism, the Spring Festival is a custom, that is, to have a reunion year." As the country gradually became stronger and gradually entered the center of the historical stage, the world began to pay attention to the Chinese New Year, and this matter is especially prominent in your school. ”

Zhang Lili said with a smile, "You are so right, and we are very close to the Institute of Nationalities, and our language university is a world language college, people from all nationalities all over the world come here to study, learn from each other, and learn from each other. This kind of multicultural thinking has also become a cultural characteristic of our school, and the students are very harmonious with each other, as if they are performing their own cultures on a big stage of world peace. Foreigners are interested in Chinese culture, and they go to the surrounding universities to listen to lectures, and your Yenching University is the place where students are most concentrated in listening to lectures, and those classical Chinese culture and ancient Chinese art are the objects of their research, the objects of pursuit, and the direction of study. As Chinese undergraduates, we are also very interested in foreign cultures on this stage, and it is also our mission to learn more and learn more about the background of world cultures during our time in school. ”

Today Zhang Lili is very happy, the open box has not been closed, there is a topic to his mouth, he will quote the classics, Tang Seng, so there is a set of theories, a set of practice, and a set of their own subjective views, chatting with these two people, you can learn a lot of knowledge, you can understand the customs of the world can also smell the changes in the world's political pattern, this is like a small society in the world, those geopolitical power games are staged here in turn, so the changes in foreign trends of thought, Some of the theoretical research trends in foreign countries are relatively cutting-edge. If as a young person, you want to know more about the world, come to the language university, you can sit in the restaurant and meet people from all over the world, you can know what is happening in the world, you will hunt down the neighborhood and talk about the future, you can use this stage as a microcosm of globalization, you can see those international students from developed countries spending a lot of money, you can also see those people in developing countries are striving for excellence, striving for progress, and studying hard for the prosperity of the country, which is a display of spiritual outlook. This is the pursuit of the national spirit, which is also the greatest mission of young people, our strong socialist motherland, can have such an open and comprehensive world journalism university, put this multicultural stage, let the world's promising young people perform on it, to promote world peace, to promote the friendship of the people of the world, planted the seeds of friendship, the seeds of hope, although the students who came one by one, but these with Chinese culture, with Chinese elements, and back to their own country seeds, Friendship with China and peace in the world are undoubtedly a great contribution.

We were eating, and suddenly a group of people wearing Southeast Asian clothes came to the cafeteria and sat up directly, these people's expressions were very serious, and the clothes they wore were also dark colors, I asked Zhang Lili about his situation with my eyes, Zhang Lili obviously understood, and said to me gently, "This is the social reality I just said, these people are Thai and Japanese, recently there was an incident in our language university, that is, a Japanese student from Thailand, who attempted suicide one night, These people are relatives from both countries. ”

This is a second-year student at the Language and Culture University, his father was a Japanese businessman who established his own factory in Thailand, so he also established a home of his own in Thailand, married a local Thai girl, and gave birth to this student named Masao Kato.

The family family is a very famous family in eastern Japan, established a factory in Thailand, this factory has been operating for about 20 years, Kato Masao's father is called Kato Shin, as a representative of the family to manage the factory in Thailand, the efficiency of the factory is very good, the products are also sold all over the world, this factory is to make standard parts, the family trading company itself is a multinational group company, in the mid-80s Japan is developing at a high speed, the business of the Kato family is also rising rapidly, Various standardized factories have been established all over the world, and most of the children of the Kato family have been sent out to manage local factories.

Katenshin was in his early 30s at that time, and went to Thailand to work hard, and a local toast's daughter Ming Media is married, and there is a formal mansion in the south of Thailand, although the Kato family is a very large family, the constraints on the men of their family are not so strict, most of these men have established families in Japan, after marrying wives and having children, they go to all over the world to set up factories, these factories need the protection of local eyesight after opening, They used this relationship to break up with local celebrities, and the way of marriage is also the best way to combine with local forces, and it is this path that Katenshin took to marry Kato Masao's mother.

After getting married, the Thai girl knew that Kato Masao had a family in Japan, and Katenshin's wife was also a young lady of a famous family in Japan, and there was a complete and happy family in Japan, the marriage of the Thai girl, although the family family did not object, and it was also married for the benefit of the family, but in the series of the Kato family, her status was not recognized, and the phenomenon of patriarchy in Japanese society was extremely serious, although the mother with family difficulties had no status in the Japanese family. However, Kato Masao is the only son of Katenshin, and every year he returns to the headquarters of the Japanese family to meet his elders, and this situation of monogamy has been tormenting Kato Masao.

Katenshin's wife in Japan, because she gave birth to two daughters, basically has no status in the family, and when it is difficult to be brought in from Thailand every year, this Japanese woman is extremely friendly to Kato Bunan, and she takes care of her diet and daily life, knowing that this is her own man, and he has a family abroad, and he is facing the pressure of family inheritance, and in this patriarchal family society, he can only swallow his anger.

Kato Masao grew up in this environment, a father, two mothers, the father is domineering in both families, and the quirky character is either beating or scolding both mothers, as he grows older, Kato Masao is becoming more and more resistant to Katenshin, and after entering puberty, Kato Masao's rebellious psychology is getting stronger and stronger, and the relationship with his father is becoming more and more deadlocked.

Kato Masao is a very smart boy, and his academic performance is also very good, according to the family's plan, to let Kato Masao be admitted to Waseda University in Japan, the more his father asks for this, the more Kato is resistant, his resistance is unique, that is, he puts himself in a closed space, does not talk to anyone, and does not associate with anyone, which makes him a father at a loss, and his usual domineering and domineering is gone.

Kato Masao felt that his trick had an effect, so he often used it, once Kato Masao and his father had a cold war, and the father who couldn't stand it couldn't stand it, to his only son, Kato Masao added power and feet, and saw the father like a lion roaring, Kato Masao was really frightened, and begged his father for mercy repeatedly, and the mournful voice stimulated the father who burned in his angry hands, and shrank Kato Zhengnan in a corner and trembled.

Since then, Masao Kato, every time he hears his father's name or sees his father's figure, he always trembles and begs for mercy, so he sees a psychiatrist less, but it has no effect, and the father has to avoid his son. In order to alleviate the normal psychological problems of the family, Masao Kato did not enter the Waseda University they hoped for, but he was admitted to a Chinese language university accompanied by his Thai mother.

Kato Masao has been enrolled for more than a year, his emotions have slowly calmed down, and the original mental condition has been relieved, everyone thinks that Kato Masao has completely improved, Kato Masao's academic performance is also among the best in the class, not only all kinds of test scores are very good, but also the culture of Japan during the Meiji Restoration, special interest, and wrote several papers in a row, all published in Japanese magazines.

Kato Masao's academic achievements have become his father's capital to show off, through the relationship, his father found Waseda University, and submitted Kato Masao's academic papers and the results of his studies at Naka-Chinese Language University to Waseda University, the Kato family has always been an external director of Waseda University, and seeing Kato Masao's research results, it is indeed a very excellent result, Waseda University made an exception to admit Kato Masao.

When the news was conveyed to Masao Kato by the people of the Kato family, Masao Kato was very happy on the surface, but within a month, people found that Masao Kato couldn't sleep at night, but curled up in the apartment by himself, the darker it was, the more he shivered, his eyes were stunned, he didn't talk to anyone, he didn't communicate with anyone, and Masao Kato's depression recurred.

After Kato Masao's Thai mother found out about the situation, she soon reported the situation like her father in Thailand, and the most famous psychiatrist in Japan was invited to China to give Kato Masao psychotherapy, and the treatment time has been more than two months, and the effect of psychotherapy has gradually appeared, Kato Masao has gradually returned to normal, and the Kato family no longer urges the family to transfer to another school.

Who knew that all this improvement was an illusion, Kato Masao's diary was discovered by his mother, and the whole diary was designed, how to commit suicide? It turned out that his depression was all to deceive the psychiatrist, and his dual personality made him wear a mask, on the one hand, to deal with the psychiatrist's treatment, and on the other hand, to plan to end his young life, he wrote in his diary:

The devil in my heart still can't fight, but I don't have any strength in my body, although he is on the ceiling, looking at me with a hideous face, I don't want to avoid him anymore, in fact, I can't avoid him, because my whole body is sore, and I don't even have the strength to blink my eyes.

Why is the world so cruel? It has been tormenting me for several years, I have tried my best to restrain this fear in my heart, I have been trying to avoid this darkness, this world will always be dark for me, is it still interesting to live? Why is that greed everywhere? Every family is so harmonious, and why was I born into such a family? Huge wealth, prominent social status, these are all I need?

Doesn't one need to be conscious? Don't people need to have their own ideas? Since that devil tortured me, my heart has collapsed, I hope he can spare me, spare my life, I begged him in my heart for mercy, begged many times but he will always look at me hideously, always follow me hideously, I have hidden from Thailand to China, everything around me has been replaced by new people, new friends, new teachers, new universities, for a while he has disappeared, I thought that this society began to light.

But that devil still came from Japan, they forced me to go to Waseda, it was that devil who was doing trouble, that devil wanted to spy on me anytime and anywhere, it seems that I can't avoid this devil in this life, I want to kill this devil, but this devil is too powerful, always in a dark place, with a hideous smile, get out, devil, countless curses in my heart.

Now it seems that this society has no meaning for me, I pity my mother, I live with this devil every day, I want to save him, but I have no strength at all, not only do I not have the strength to eat, but I also have the strength to get up, I even blink my eyes and now I feel very tired, the most effective way to escape from this no devil is to kill myself, let him lose his goal, I will no longer be tortured by him, I want to go to another world.

Goodbye, devil.

Goodbye, this world.

This diary is very messily written, he has several diaries like this, he has hidden this diary very secretly, it seems that he has lost confidence in himself, the struggle of the mind has been going on in his mind for several years, this time it was finally discovered by his mother, so that it did not cause a tragedy.

This incident is so serious that the school found out that concealing the student's illness was not allowed for the school, and if a student has a problem, how can it cause a diplomatic incident? So the school asked his parents to come to the school to discuss the student's problem.

After Zhang Lili finished talking to me, I felt very uncomfortable, how could such a deformed society, such a strange family, and such a devilish person who poisoned his children stand in this society? How can you still make huge profits in the economy and society? Even those who don't let go of their own children, who carry out such persecution and torture, are they still humane?

I said to Zhang Lili, "A society can turn a family upside down like this, and a family can turn a boy into such a tangled person, what will their society be like?" What a strange thing it is to favor sons over daughters, to connive at their own families, to establish foreign histories abroad, and to bring their children back to China, what a strange thing, this child will definitely have a shadow in his heart, and there will definitely be psychological problems, don't they understand such a point? ”

Zhang Lili sighed and said, "This is the tragedy of patriarchy in that society, desperate for the reproduction of the family, even their own relatives are not spared, in their minds the inheritance is the first, family reproduction is more important than anything else, even the most basic human nature can be avoided." This phenomenon of patriarchy has always existed, in some places it is more serious, in some places it is slightly lighter, and those who have money are even more so, they think that with money they can do whatever they want, and they can make the family a wonderful thing that can turn children into their tools, this is the evil consequences of patriarchy in front of us. ”

I really sympathized with the boy, and said to Zhang Lili, "Since I know that he has severe depression, is it not effective for so many years of treatment by psychiatrists?" Wouldn't medicine solve his problem? ”

Zhang Lili said, "The probability of this mental illness has not been found so far, although many medical institutions have been studying this disease for a long time, but in addition to psychological counseling and some drug support, there is no good way, since this disease has it, it will accompany you for the rest of your life, it is said that few people are cured, but with the support of drugs, some conditions have been relieved and can return to normal." I once listened to a lecture that specifically talked about this kind of depression, these people have no strength at all when it is severe, let alone get up from bed, let alone walk, they don't even bother to swallow when they eat, their misanthropy is very serious, so they don't implement the suicide results they envisioned, because they don't have the strength in them, and when the treatment is just beginning to take effect, this time is the most dangerous, because they have the strength to implement their ideas. ”

I am immersed in my own reflection, although there are genetic factors for people to get this disease, there are also problems with social environment, family environment, and social rhythm, which are not transferred by people's will, but the overall symptoms of this disease are still caused by society, if there are no stimuli in a certain part of society, how can this disease be induced? Society is sick, so it can make such a young life so uncomfortable and tortured like this.

What modern society lacks is humanistic care, although we are economically underdeveloped, the intimate feeling between people is not proportional to modern society, in such a city, such a cement forest, all kinds of strange ideas will appear, people live in this environment for a long time, how can they ensure that their hearts do not have problems? What's more, in this society, all money is supreme, and all moral standards will make way for money, so can young people not think about it?

How to make people feel a kind of warmth, let people feel that the true feelings of the world will not be emotional, nor will there be psychological problems, isn't this not what every one of us living in modern society should reflect on and think about seriously? The human world is different from other worlds, that is, feelings are moral, once there is a conflict between feelings and morality, there will be some discomfort in your heart, long-term discomfort or long-term distortion, which will cause psychological problems, these psychological problems are actually a powerful spiritual force, a kind of emptiness, a kind of fear, a kind of confusion.

In the face of social development, in the face of world turmoil, and in the face of social wonders, shouldn't we have a good time to reflect? The vast majority of people are able to resist short-term sickness, and if this social pathology is maintained for a long time, isn't it destroying those fragile hearts, and it is more difficult for the family to face a tragic world, and how many people in the world are also facing this tragic event?

When we see Masao Kato's diary, in front of the world, in this sick family forced him to wear a mask, there will always be a devil in the depths of the soul, this devil is at war with your wisdom, and your standards of life are in the game, and the heart of being bullied or bullied is always distorted, this kind of psychological disease is really frightening, shouldn't our society reflect collectively? Should there be more warmth in the world?

Zhang Lili looked at me, silent, this matter really made all people feel a little depressed, Zhang Lili smiled and said, "People with mental illness must have internal and external reasons, after all, people who are sick are a minority, a vulnerable group, need social care, need people's care, in fact, there is nothing in the heart, just like we have a headache and brain fever, just see a doctor to take medicine to cure it, and there is no need to be too entangled in this matter, but in our daily life, No matter what setbacks, difficulties, or circumstances, you must strengthen your heart, never punish yourself with the mistakes of others, and ensure your own energy, mental health, and psychological health. ”