"It's not too early, I should go back too, if you find yourself panicked one day, or when you need help, you can call me, I'm leaving."

Without waiting for me to respond, Si Lingyan slowly got up and walked into the distance.

I was like a piece of rotten wood, staring blankly at her back, and I suddenly felt that Si Lingyan and I were similar, and this thought was so subtle that even I couldn't see what was wrong.

I smoked a cigarette and thought for a long time, maybe there was a loneliness in each of us, the pain of not being able to struggle when we were suffocating.

I coughed violently, and I didn't want to smoke the remaining half of the cigarette.

Suddenly, I felt a drop of water fall on the tip of my nose, and I couldn't help but look up at the sky.

The gloomy clouds gradually piled up, and I could no longer catch any light in the crevices of the branches, and the leaves rustled as the breeze swelled.

The silent raindrops fell in large chunks, and I couldn't help but stand up and rush home with hurried steps.

I took off my soaked clothes and went to the bathroom for a hot shower, and then I lay on the bed, staring feebly at the ceiling.

The raging cold wind swept countless raindrops frantically against the window, and I listened with my eyes closed, thinking about every word that Si Lingyan said to me.

Si Lingyan and I are really similar, she has a similar experience and a persistent feeling for music, including those words that were said to me in the park, which only make sense when I think about it now.

Since everyone has a shackle in their heart that traps them in a sturdy cage, why not stop and look at the trail of what they have walked through?

But no matter how far I go, those places are always my own experience, no matter the joy and sorrow, no matter the madness and the vastness.

I suddenly remembered my dad again, and in retrospect, this was the first time I felt that my dad understood me so well, and I even wanted to call him now and ask him where he had found this woman named Si Lingyan.

After the rain, the city is filled with the fragrance of earth, and with the rain it seems that it is not only dust, but also filth that people have never noticed.

I saw the glow of the sun as the clouds dissipated, the crowd of people in the streets once again, and the joy of the children in the park, except for the empty bench with the half of a cigarette butt soaked in the rain, which reminded me of my dark past.

From beginning to end, I lay on the bed and looked out the window calmly, until the sun was about to set, and I remembered that it was almost time for Yin Lanlan to get out of school.

I washed my face and went out to walk towards the school, just before I arrived at the school, I heard a hurried bell, and after waiting for a while, I saw Yin Lanlan trotting towards me with her head bared in the crowd.

I squatted down and let Yin Lanlan throw herself into my arms and be coquettish, "Dad, the teacher praised me today, because I did all the exercises on the back of the newspaper correctly." ”

I gently scratched Yin Lanlan's nose and smiled, "Lanlan is awesome." ”

On the way out of school, there will always be countless stalls and carts with a variety of snacks and drinks.

There were many students of the same age as Yin Lanlan who were holding their parents' hands and crying on the ground, clamoring to eat those things.

I glanced at Yin Lanlan, who was holding my hand and walking forward intently, without crying or making trouble, as if she had blocked the temptation of these foods.

I don't know why, but I felt a little more guilty in my heart.

To be honest, I would love to surprise Yin Lanlan and use double or even triple love to make up for the vacancy she once had.

As long as I can see Yin Lanlan laughing, my heart will feel a little better.

I touched my pocket, looked at Yin Lanlan with a smile and said, "Dad bought you fried skewers as a reward, okay?" ”

Hearing this, Yin Lanlan raised her head, stared at me with big eyes, and refused: "I don't want it!" ”

"What Lanlan wants, tell Dad, Dad will promise you anything."

Yin Lanlan's eyes were happy, and she asked excitedly; "Really?"

I nodded and said, "Of course it's true, just say it, Dad will satisfy you." ”

Yin Lanlan held back her strength and shouted up and down, "I want to go to my mother." ”

My body shuddered suddenly, and even the dark eyes in my eye sockets shrank suddenly, filled with shock.

My heart is like an overturned five-flavor bottle, giving me an indescribable taste.

Like a bloody rain, the howling wind slapped my numb body wantonly, wailing in every pore of mine.

But I never revealed these negative emotions, I stretched out my hand and gently stroked Yin Lanlan's head and said, "Okay, Dad promises you, one day Dad will take you to Mom." ”

Hearing my assurance, Yin Lanlan became even more excited, so much so that when she got home, she was softly humming nursery rhymes.

I sat on the sofa and lit a cigarette, looking at Yin Lanlan who was doing my homework in a complicated way.

At this moment, I feel like a scumbag, I am even cheating on my most important girl, where is there any mother, I have long thought that Shu Yang is dead!

Yin Lanlan, do you know that it is impossible for you to see Shu Yang in your life!

My breathing was getting heavier and heavier, and even my thoughts were becoming confused, and I didn't want to think about it at all!

The hurried ringtone stimulated my eardrums at this moment, and I grabbed my phone and took a look, and found that it was Zhou Yao calling.

I thought about it for a while, but I decided to answer her call.

After swiping the answer button, I put my phone to my ear, "Hey? What's wrong? ”

"Are you going to mess with Kong Mengfan again?" Zhou Yao said anxiously.

I was slightly stunned and surprised: "No." ”

"Then why did he threaten me with your name? What the hell are you doing! Zhou Yao scolded angrily.

"If you say no, you don't have any, I didn't do anything!"

"You're hopeless!" Zhou Yao said indignantly.

Without waiting for me to respond, she hung up the phone directly, I was a little depressed, if it weren't for Yin Lanlan near me, I would have wanted to vent now.

I lit a cigarette and smoked heavily, thinking about what Zhou Yao had just said to me.

When Kong Mengfan's name was mentioned, I couldn't get angry.

In order not to let Yin Lanlan be blinded by the shadow of her life, I have already made such a big regression! But I didn't expect that I was already embarrassed to be what I am now, and Kong Mengfan was still biting me! Does he really think I'm a soft persimmon that can be pinched at will!

I gasped for breath and took a hard puff of my cigarette, listening to the crackling sound of the tobacco burning.