My name is Bai Qian, and since I can remember, there have always been three men in my life, my father, my brother, and one named Zhao Kaixuan.

I remember when I was a child, my brother was still so tall. At that time, my brother always carried a stool and sat in the middle of the courtyard, and then Zhao Kaixuan and I sat beside my brother left and right, listening to my brother tell us stories.

At that time, my brother could still pick us all up and put us on his lap. At that time, I was really happy. At that time, outside the courtyard gate of my house was an iron gate made of steel bars, and there were many huge gaps in the middle of the iron gates, and Zhao Kaixuan always got into through the cracks.

When Zhao Kaixuan came, he would always bring me some delicious things, including delicious cream cakes, water ghost cakes, and chocolate cakes. Sometimes they bring me some fruits, and every time we have a good time.

But suddenly one day, when Zhao Kaixuan entered my house again, there were other children outside the door, pointing at my face and scolding me: "Shameless, unproductive, eat other people's things every day." ”

Although I didn't understand these words at that time, from my brother's angry expression, I still felt that this must not be a good thing. When I saw the other children pointing at me, I suddenly felt like crying.

Since then, I have been reluctant to sit with Zhao Kaixuan. Later, when Zhao Kaixuan came back, I didn't want to play with Zhao Kaixuan. But Zhao Kaixuan's father is very good, I always remember that every time Zhao Kaixuan's father came to our house, his parents always cooked a lot of delicious food.

Although I don't like Zhao Kaixuan very much, my parents always let me play with Zhao Kaixuan, and I hate it. Later, I finally went to school, and finally I didn't have to play with Zhao Kaixuan every day.

But when I got to school, I realized that I hated it more than at home. Zhao Kaixuan's money seems to never be spent, he always buys a lot of things for other children, and before the end of class, Zhao Kaixuan gathers in the commissary with others.

But Zhao Kaixuan always came to me with a lot of snacks, no matter how I gave Zhao Kaixuan a roll of eyes, Zhao Kaixuan still smiled and relied on my side.

When I went home for dinner in the evening, I heard my mother say to my father: "This Xiaokai is really naughty, his parents want to earn him to a private school, he has to do it, and he has to go to school in the same class as Bai Qian." ”

Dad also smiled: "The two children have grown up, and if they can really succeed in the future, it will be a good thing." ”

Mom said with a smile: "The two children are only in elementary school, you think so far, what conditions our family has, what conditions do people have, we can't climb high." ”

I quietly memorized the word Gao Pan, and it was much later that I understood what the word Gao Pan meant. In this way, I hate Zhao Kaixuan even more, I don't understand, why even my parents feel that they can't climb Zhao Kaixuan.

I don't want to deal with Zhao Kaixuan anymore, in school, Bai Qian was playing with her friends, Zhao Kaixuan suddenly came to me with a pair of snacks: "Qianqian, Qianqian, all for you, all for you!" ”

The friends who were still playing well with me all looked at Zhao Kaixuan, and everyone looked at me with envy, but I didn't like it at all.

I closed my mouth tightly and refused to eat anything, and Zhao Kaixuan was a little disappointed. Zhao Kaixuan at that time was really good-looking, with long eyelashes and big eyes, both teachers and classmates liked him very much. Only I didn't like him, so I became an alternative in the eyes of my classmates.

I understand one thing more and more, Zhao Kaixuan's family is very rich, and my own family is very poor. Zhao Kaixuan's pocket money can't be spent, and my pocket money depends on my parents' faces and moods.

When my parents are in a good mood, they will give me a dollar, but this dollar is pitiful compared to Zhao Kaixuan's pocket money, I remember when I was in elementary school, Zhao Kaixuan could take out hundreds of yuan of pocket money.

I live very close to Zhao Kaixuan's family, the year we went to elementary school, Zhao Kaixuan's family was going to build a new house, and at that time the old houses of several families next door to our family were demolished, and everyone said at that time that Zhao Kaixuan's family was going to build a big villa.

At that time, I didn't know what a big villa was, so I hoped that Zhao Kaixuan's villa could be built as soon as possible. I looked at the outside of Zhao Kaixuan's house, built a high wall, and then two huge gates, I don't know how many times larger than the gate of our house.

Because the outside of Zhao Kaixuan's house has a high wall, I can no longer see what it looks like inside. Even if I climbed onto the roof of our house, I could only see the tip of Zhao Kaixuan's house.

Zhao Kaixuan's villa, on the day of the capping, almost all the people in the town went to Zhao Kaixuan's house, but I didn't go. On that day, my parents went to Zhao Kaixuan's house for dinner, and they were supposed to take me with them, but I insisted on eating at home with my brother.

My brother asked me, "Why don't you go to Zhao Kaixuan's house for dinner, there are so many delicious foods today!" ”

I stubbornly turned my head: "I don't like to go to their house!" ”

"Bai Qian, Bai Qian............" Zhao Kaixuan didn't know when he came to our house, holding a big bowl in his hand, which contained a lot of delicious things, it seemed that Zhao Kaixuan specially sent it.

"Brother Bai Lang, this is what I sent to you, why don't you go to my house for dinner, my house has been built, but it is beautiful." Zhao Kaixuan put the bowl on the table, and I deliberately turned my face away because I didn't like to see Zhao Kaixuan.

Zhao Kaixuan's voice carried some grievances: "Bai Qian, why don't you go to my house for dinner?" ”

I slammed my chopsticks hard: "Whoever wants to go to your house for dinner, who rarely goes to your house for dinner." I'm not going! ”

My brother looked at me like this, sighed next to me, and then said to Zhao Kaixuan: "Xiao Kai, thank you, my brother's leg is inconvenient, so I didn't go to your house, your house is so beautiful, Bai Qian She is not angry with you, you go back, let you go to school together tomorrow." ”

After Zhao Kaixuan left, my brother asked me: "Why do you suddenly dislike Zhao Kaixuan, weren't you very good when you were a child?" ”

I remembered what others said to me: "They all said that I was unproductive, and I followed Zhao Kaixuan because Zhao Kaixuan's family was rich, and they also said that our family was poor, so they would please Zhao Kaixuan's family." "Naturally, I didn't tell my brother, because others called my brother a cripple and a cripple.

I don't know why, although my brother has grown taller, his legs have become crooked and he can't stand straight. My brother can't walk like a normal adult when he walks, and he walks tremblingly. I learned from my parents that my brother's name was polio.

I don't know what polio is, but he made my brother never be like everyone else.

………………

When we went to school, we would pass by a street where we were shopping for clothes. I remember when I was in the third grade of elementary school, I passed by there when I was in school, and there was a beautiful white dress in the window, and I liked it so much, because there are so beautiful clothes in this world.

I looked in front of the window for a long time, Zhao Kaixuan kept following me, Zhao Kaixuan asked me, "Bai Qian, what are you looking at?" ”

I didn't speak, I just continued to look at which clothes, I never seemed to have worn new clothes, my clothes were all brought by my mother from the Zhao family, and many of them were leftover clothes from Zhao Kaixuan's two sisters.

I walked in and asked the proprietress, "Auntie, how much does this dress cost?" ”

The boss saw that I was a child, and he didn't even want to talk to me more, so he simply said: "120, if you buy it sincerely, 100 yuan will do." ”

Zhao Kaixuan asked me, "Bai Qian, do you want it?" I'll buy it for you? ”

I didn't answer Zhao Kaixuan's question, and went to school with my head down. When I got out of school, I didn't go through any more window, I came home, looked at my mother who was cooking at home, and thought for a long time, I couldn't help but walk towards my mother: "Mom, I want to buy a new dress?" ”

Mom looked up at me slightly, and then there was a hint of displeasure on her face: "What new clothes to buy, don't you have any clothes to wear?" Didn't I just get you a lot of clothes the other day? ”

I remember my hands clutching the corners of my clothes: "Those are all old, I want to buy a new one!" ”

Mom's hand, which was washing vegetables, suddenly lifted up and slapped me in the face: "Okay, I don't know how to compare with others, I know if it's right to compare with others, how can our family have the money to buy you those new clothes, I didn't see you compare with others, just look at you than this." ”

That slap hurt so much, since I didn't know how to cry, my brother came over from the side: "Why are you beating her, Xiaoqian has been wearing other people's leftover clothes, that girl doesn't like to dress up, you buy her a new one, what can I do?" ”

At that time, my brother was already taller than my mother, but he was very weak. Although my mother was strict with me, she was very kind to my brother: "Clothes, just wear them, the little girl knows that it is stinky and beautiful all day long, why do you want so many new clothes?" ”

My brother pulled me back to the room: "Qianqian, in a while, it will be your birthday, and when you celebrate your birthday, my brother must ask my mother to buy you that new dress, okay?" ”

I didn't look back and went home, at the back of our village, there were a lot of wild wolfberries, and at that time someone in the village would collect them. 2 cents a pound of wolfberries, I can pick 10 pounds before dark. Sell the picked wolfberries to get two yuan.

From that day on, I would go to the back mountain every day after school to pick goji berries, and my hands were full of red goji berry juice, but I could earn two yuan a day, and on Saturdays and Sundays, I could earn more, and I felt that I could buy a piece of clothing in a month.

I put all the money I earned under my pillow and looked at the extra change every day, counting it several times a day, figuring out how long it would take me to buy a new dress.

I wish I could wear a new dress on my birthday, 50 dollars, 60 dollars, 70 dollars, 80 dollars, 90 dollars, 92.94.96.98 dollars, and finally I was only two dollars away, and I saved up enough for 100 dollars.

That day, I stayed in the back mountain for a long time, and I was afraid that I would not pick enough wolfberries that day, and when I got the last two yuan and wanted to go home, I almost flew into the house.

Another day is my birthday, I am going to buy a dress today, I happily lifted my pillow, only to find that under my pillow, the original 98 yuan, is gone.

I rushed to the yard and shouted at my mother, "Where is the money under my pillow?" ”

Mom still didn't look up, but simply said: "I brought it, you little child, why do you want so much money?" It just so happens that the family has no money to eat, so let's use it to buy vegetables! ”

I remember tears streaming down my eyes: "Those are the money I used to sell goji berries to buy new clothes?" You give me back the money, you give me back the money. ”

My mother didn't pay attention to me who was angry: "What clothes to buy, you know how to buy clothes all day long, I won't buy them for you, I see what you can do?" ”

I looked at my mother's pocket, where my mother had always put her money, and I rushed forward impatiently, wanting to grab it: "You give me the money, this is my money, I want to buy clothes!" ”

This move of mine completely angered my mother, and my mother slapped me to the ground: "I see that you rebelled, your money, your father and I raised you since childhood, I don't know how much it spent, so I won't buy it for you, I think you can do it?" ”

I fell to the ground, I felt deeply wronged, and at this time my brother walked out: "You obviously know that she goes to pick wolfberries every day after school, just to buy clothes, you take her money away, can she not be aggrieved?" ”

My mother's attitude towards my brother is always so gentle: "I can't go home after school every day, and my academic performance is not good, so I know how to buy clothes!" ”

My brother helped me up on the ground: "You give her the money, if you don't give it to her, I won't take medicine today." ”

Mom smiled and took out a hundred dollars from her pocket: "Give it to you, and you will get used to her!" My brother took a hundred yuan, and then touched my head: "Let's go, my brother will take you to buy clothes." ”

I vividly remember that day, my trembling brother, holding my hand, we seemed to have walked for a long time before we reached a store, but I saw that the window was empty.

"Auntie, where is the white dress?" My heart is lost.

The proprietress smiled: "I just sold it this afternoon, let's look at something else, I have a lot of new beautiful clothes here!" ”

At that moment, I felt like crying, and my brother touched my head: "Qianqian, is that yellow dress good, it looks good!" ”

I nodded numbly, and let my brother help me pick out a dress, in fact, the yellow dress that my brother helped me choose is also very good, but it is not what I like, but it is still my first new dress.