Arrogance is the most comfortable and cheap garment for failure. Jongri is so accustomed to arrogance that he often doesn't realize that he is wearing something heavy and unsightly. It is undeniable that Zhong Li really can't see that people from the same background as him are better off than him, except for standing at the height of the Jade Emperor with a mouth and sneering at the gains and losses of these characters, what weapons does he have?

At eleven o'clock in the evening, he broke up with Lao Tao, and Zhong Li wandered around the farmer's market alone. When I first came to the farmer's market more than 20 years ago, I thought it was as big, but now this big place can't accommodate him, or can't accommodate him. At twelve o'clock in the middle of the night, Zhong Li was completely sleepy, so he traveled to Pengcheng at night with his hands in his pockets as usual.

The scolding of a drunkard is particularly loud, the sleep of a permanent person in a house is a little desolate, the miasma of the black smoke in the bar makes the street vendors a little funny, and the efficient operation of the hot economy makes the air of this winter moon particularly cold...... For some reason, Zhong Li somewhat likes the night in this city. It's a pity that I'm not an artist, and I can't use or capture his fleeting observations and thoughts.

"Ten dollars a box! Ten dollars a box! Two meat and two vegetables, do you want to buy some? The obese middle-aged man, with short eyes, sells his lunch box to Chung-ri.

The warm smiling face of the taxi driver when eating, the coo and rolling of the wine bottle on the roadside when it is blown by the wind, the rustling and swaying of the palm trees overhead, the loud crying of distant relatives and friends on the phone of the reverse filial piety of the food delivery, the scolding of young couples, and the crazy howl of wild dogs in the distance; The red taillights of the main road, the purple tubes of the buildings in the distance, the bloated stench of the garbage mountain, the hypocritical noise of the nightclubs in the distance, the silent pleading in the eyes of stray cats, the excessive glare of the endless street lamps, the exhaustion of the roadside vendors, the sleepless people in the buildings; In addition, the alertness and cuteness of the rats crossing the street, the speed and strength of the 120 ambulance, the rumbling and luck of several heavy crime cars, the emptiness and brand-new of the dusk bus, the depression and freedom of the wind blowing the leaves, the rust and hoarseness of the iron door of the shop, the hurry and helplessness of getting off work at night, the silence and heat of the night snack shop, the relentlessness and undulation of the wind blowing plastic bags, the collapse and blockage of underground pipes, the clothes and water droplets falling from high in the air, the slow operation and jamming of the air conditioner, the brightness and ethereal of a round and a half moon, the lightness and elegance of the white clouds through the moon......

Zhong Li seems to be an old friend of the city, he looks at the city as if he were an old friend with his rough snoring, dark neck lines, and dirty trouser legs, and he wants to see them from the perspective of the city, the night, and the earth.

The scene of midnight and early morning brought Zhong Li a kind of empty psychology, not empty emptiness, but high above, empty emptiness. The more he looks at external objects, the easier it is to forget himself, and this kind of looking down gives him a sense of calmness and detachment. He imagined himself like a god, or he was imitating the way a god looked down on all beings, and the unity of his movements would promote the synchronization of thoughts, he thought.

He just doesn't like to put a person named Zhong Li into his body anymore, he doesn't want to re-examine everything related to Zhong Li, he no longer cares about what Zhong Li cares about, and he doesn't want to care about what Zhong Li cares about. This person just wants to let himself live a blank life with no memory, no filtering of time, and no reason—escaping from the city and order, experiencing nature and emptiness, escaping from nothingness and failure, experiencing vastness and grandeur—he ignores Zhong Li and Zhong Li's world from an angle that is higher than reality and nature, and tries to live an anti-realistic or anti-realistic life.

So, he chooses to travel at night, and the man who travels at night can be anyone. He doesn't have to be overly involved in reality or need reality, what he really needs is the moon – the moon that is far away, the moon that has nothing to do with the earth. There are too many people chasing and judging this era, and there is no need for one more.

After finding a place where he could watch the moon, Chung Li sat down to rest. This sitting, as usual, a few hours passed.

"Ahh Ahh Ahh ”

Three startled sneezes, and at four o'clock in the morning, Chungri, whose body was stiff and numb, got up from the wooden bench in the park. The temperature dropped a lot, the man shivered with cold, and he had to move himself so as not to get sick.

Because the moon went down, reality came flooding in.

Unconsciously, he walked in the direction of Fuchun District. A heart hesitated in the darkness, but fortunately the hesitation was suppressed by the huge void. At half past five, Zhong Li knocked on his door. That's right, the key to Fuchun District, he has never had Sakura

The high-speed train that Bao Xiaoxing ordered departed at 9 o'clock in the morning, and the alarm clock was at 6 o'clock, when he was already a little conscious at half past five, and when he heard someone knocking on the door, one of Hyosung's hearts instantly rose to his throat. She wasn't sure if she was knocking on her own door or the other door, and she didn't get up until she heard clearly.

"Who? This point knocks on the door. Bao Xiaotang, who slept in Xuemei's house, also got up sleepy-eyed.

"I don't know...... Bao Xiaoxing looked frightened and got dressed and went to open the door.

Walk to the door, pick up a hammer that is always on guard, and then rush out the door and ask loudly, "Who?" ”

"It's me." Zhong Li said deeply.

Hyosung was relieved and looked back at her sister, with pity in her eyes. When Xiaotang heard that it was Meimei and her father, she was afraid and turned into anger in a blink of an eye, her eyes were white, she had nothing to say, and went back to her room.

Bao Xiaoxing opened the door, raised his head and asked with great surprise and concern, "Why are you here?" Did you drink? ”

Zhong Li didn't know how to reply, so he looked left and right first, and then replied: "It's drinking, and the strength of the wine has long passed." If you want to go back, I'll send you. ”

"Oh......" Hyosung was stunned for a moment, then opened the door and motioned for Jongri to come in.

"What time are your tickets?" Zhong Li asked.

"At nine o'clock, we will arrive at the station and leave at seven o'clock."

"It's cooled down, wear thicker."

"Yes."

Zhong Li sat lonely on the sofa, looking at his home like the Louvre. Bao Xiaoxing began to wash and clean up, Xiaotang couldn't sleep early, and sulked on the bed - angry back to Zhong Li beat his sister to a bloody face, Sister Qi doesn't have a long memory and is always easily convinced by a few soft words, Sister Qi still can't make up her mind when she mentions divorce, Qi Zhongli is not a thing for his wife and son......

At half past six, Hyosung was almost packed, and Xiaotang began to prepare for work. The justified woman came and went at home and passed by the living room sofa seven or eight times, without saying a word of "brother-in-law", and deliberately made all kinds of noises in the room or bathroom, and the anger conveyed by Xiaotang sprayed all over the house. Hyosung couldn't persuade if he wanted to, so Jongri could only endure it by himself.

"Tang'er, sister is leaving!" When it was almost seven o'clock, Bao Xiaoxing pulled the box and greeted his sister in the room.

"Got it!" Xiaotang put on makeup in the room, and her beautiful makeup couldn't hide the anger on her face at all. Originally, she was the one who sent her sister, but now she has been replaced by the person she dislikes the most.

"Lock the door when you go!" Hyosung confessed.

"Know—Dao." Xiaotang was impatient.

Bao Xiaoxing put the bag on his back and carried the bag, Zhong Li took the suitcase, and the couple went out together. Xiaotang listened to the sound and left, poked his head out to make sure, and when he was really gone, the woman sat on the sofa, shaking her head and sighing, helpless.

The husband and wife have nothing to say all the way, and the pain of the past seems to be in the past life, not the present life. Hyosung was in a hurry, and she was moved by Chung Li's send-off, but she was not so moved; Jong Lee was lucky to have the opportunity to ride and walk with Hyosung for a while, but he was not so lucky. There are so many things that break the silence between the two of them – the old man's meals, Mei Mei's college life, her math grades, the neighborhood around the grocer shop, the gossip in the farmer's market, and Hyosung's two new jobs...... Zhong Li and Hyosung, outsiders look like women in charge, but in fact, Bao Xiaoxing, who has an extremely traditional concept, has never been the one who holds power. Zhong Li is very comfortable in this marriage, he knows that he can save everything, but he has no will and strength to save it.

Doesn't he love Hyosung? No, he loved her, as deeply as he first met. Doesn't he care for his children? No, he was glad the children hadn't left him; Isn't he grateful to his old father? Of course, thankfully, he has always relied on his father like a child. But in the past few years, compared with family, wife, children, social interactions, career development, etc., the midnight wine, white sleep, and the blank space in his heart are his most urgent needs. Perhaps, these three things are hurting him; Perhaps, these three things are saving him. He also doesn't know that he goes with his heart, anti-world, anti-experience, and anti-conventional. It may be that he was too twisted and depressed in the past, which caused such a big backlash today.

His heart was originally the blue and white clouds on the Loess Plateau, and in the wet southern city, he was covered with thick clouds and heavy rain at every turn. Zhong wants to get rid of the city and civilization, understanding and normalcy, and he wants to go to a place without an engine to dry his wet and moldy mind. For example, go to a primitive island, build a thatched hut, and listen to the rain and wind in the shed every day. In the morning, I went to the mountains with the locals to pick fruits and dig in the fields to eat; In the evening, pull a hammock between two tall coconut trees and lie on the bed until the sun sets and swallows up the sea......

The middle-aged man has long been interested in speculating how embarrassed his face is in people's hearts, his wife and children don't care anymore, does he still care about a good reputation? But before, twenty years ago, he had regarded fame as the only meaning of his life.

After arriving at the station, the husband and wife still had nothing to say, and after taking the ticket to the waiting area of the high-speed train in Hyosung, the two sat on the iron chair and waited dryly. Half an hour later, the train began to check tickets, and Hyosung moved through the crowd with his things, and Jong-ri helped push the boxes on the side. The surrounding waiting area is densely packed with hundreds of people, eating melon seeds, joking, smoking, eating instant noodles, carrying large woven bags, coaxing children, playing with mobile phones, and snoring...... The unique scene of the station gave Chung Lee a sense of déjà vu – a memory of taking the train to and from his hometown in the first few years of his arrival in Shenzhen, and Hyosung also felt this way. Between them, the memories are too deep, but the pain is like a river, blocking the past and the present.

The ticket was cut, and Hyosung only turned around and said expressionlessly, "I'm leaving," and then disappeared along the flow of people.

Ma Guiying slept well again last night, she got up late in the morning, she felt cold after getting up, and when she saw that the temperature of her mobile phone had dropped by eleven degrees, she took out her thick coat from the wardrobe and threw it on her daughter's bed before leaving.

The morning had passed, and the biological clock rang first Yang Yang opened his eyes, looking at the bright and pink room, and always felt that something was wrong, and the child picked his nose and was in the house for a few minutes. When she was completely awake, the man slipped out of bed barefoot to find his grandfather, pulling his beard, pulling his hair, poking his nostrils—this kind of troublemaking did not wake him up, and the child used the same lion's roar as her mother.

"Grandpa? Grandfather? What time is Grandpa? Grandpa, do I still go to school......"

Only then did the old horse open his eyes, and when he looked at his watch, he said, "Oops, I missed sleep!" ”

The old man sat up with difficulty, and found himself stiff, his head and feet swaying. Based on experience, he touched his head and felt that his head was a little burning. The old man couldn't take care of himself, so he called the teacher to be late first, and then dressed Yangyang and washed his face. It was less than 40 minutes from home to kindergarten, but this morning the old horse walked for a full hour and a half, and came back all the way to hold on to the wall and grasp the railing.

I didn't have the heart to eat breakfast, and the septuagenarian was so tired that he hurried home to sleep. The more he slept, the colder it became, he took the air conditioner quilt of the boy, the two air conditioners were added to his tunic jacket, it was still cold, and finally the old horse moved to the sofa to sleep. Removing the mattress from the sofa, the old horse borrowed the cotton covers on both sides of the sofa to keep warm. In the winter months of the southern country, the temperature plummets, where can the northerners expect this kind of gas! It was as if the cold wind from the northwest blew into the old man's bed, as if the snow of the wax moon drifted into the head of the old horse, and the old man slept colder and colder, shivering and shivering. It was more than ten o'clock, and the hungry old man ordered takeout according to the method taught by the boy. I ate a hot meal at twelve o'clock, went back to the sofa and covered myself to sleep, and this sleep was dark.

Another trembling, the old horse took a long time to calm down, and when he opened his eyes and saw again, it was pitch black and his breathing was short. I don't know where it is, it's very bumpy. The old horse sat up slowly, pushed open the heavy wooden lid, removed the loess from the lid, and came out of something that resembled a cabinet or box. After coming out, I was really taken aback, it turned out that I was sleeping in the black coffin of the pomegranate flower, wasn't this the fir coffin I beat myself? The old man was so frightened that he hurried away.

Patted off the loess on his body, looked back at the coffin, and there was another self lying in the coffin! There was a look of merit on his face, and the old horse couldn't help but look at it. Someone should have recorded that joy – a medal for maximum freedom. Stomping your feet on the spot and scratching your head, no! He obviously slept on the sofa of his woman Yingying's house, how did he wake up from the coffin in the ground? The old horse had goosebumps all over his body, and he didn't dare to look back or think about the process.

I don't know where he is, there is desolation inside and outside the field of vision, and by the moonlight he sees himself wearing a loose oversized cotton and linen dressing gown...... He walked for a long time before he realized that he was the only one on earth. Walking and walking, he returned to Majiatun and walked down the alley to his old yard from childhood. The courtyard gate was locked, and there was no one in the tun, which was a bit abnormal. There was nowhere to go at the moment, so I had to go to the second and third brothers' houses to take a look, but the old horse turned around for a long time and couldn't find the door of the second and third brothers. The air was a little cold, and he wanted to go back to the brick platform at the entrance of the old courtyard to continue sleeping, but the old man was too sleepy.

On the way back to the old courtyard, a woman came on the road, slightly chubby and of medium stature. From a distance, he looked like her, but he wasn't sure it was her, and his face was vaguely Yingying's mother's facial features, but Yingying's mother was thin and tall. The old horse suddenly became nervous, and he realized who that person was—it was her, and she was coming! Finally she's here! The old horse has been waiting for this moment for most of his life! He was happy and resentful. He was so excited that he didn't dare to move forward, and stopped. At that moment, it was very certain, it was her! He felt both of them realize who they were. The young horse was too panicked to move, and scrambled for a solution when she approached, though he could not see her face, eyes, nose, or mouth...... It was getting closer and closer, and there were only two meters left, and the old horse was stunned, waiting for her to speak first...... Unexpectedly, she didn't know herself at all! She passed by herself! The old horse turned his head to look at her, and saw that she was slowly walking away......

"Hey......" came out of his nose in one breath. She doesn't know him! Didn't she recognize who he was! The old horse felt sad, and a few tears appeared on the clothes on his chest.

I don't know how far I went, but the old horse arrived in a village, and this alleyway seemed familiar. The old horse vaguely remembered that he had begged here when he was a teenager. He had stolen a cloth bag that he was begging for, no, it was the man who stole the cloth bag he was begging for, and he couldn't remember who stole whom...... Afraid of running into the man again, he slipped around the village.

Suddenly, Lao Ma heard someone calling him, and it turned out that it was the third brother Jiwa (the name of the third brother of Lao Ma, Ma Jianji) who ran and called him, and the third brother and his second brother were about to die. Lao Ma and Jiwa ran five miles in one go, and when he came back, he hurriedly took his second brother to the hospital on a motorcycle, but it was still too late...... Jiwa knelt on the side of the road and cried, and the old horse held his second brother and slapped it incessantly. "I told you not to go out, don't go out, big brother, why did you go out......" The third brother's complaint has been in his ears, pestering Lao Ma for more than ten years.

wiped away his tears, and in the blink of an eye, everything was gone. Tears are on my face, my heart is still crying, but it is like a dream.

When the old horse looked at his watch, it was almost four o'clock in the afternoon, and he had to pick up the doll from school. Which doll to pick up? The old mind is confused, and he can't remember it for a while. He scratched his head and pondered in place, and suddenly saw the flying child in the village. That year, the Feizi who built the building was killed by the collapse of the floor slab in front of his eyes, how could it ...... Why did Feizi live again? Feizi stepped forward to talk to the old village chief, and the old horse was a little panicked. After this chat, I realized that he had been cured, and now he was mixing well outside, but Feizi couldn't find where his door was, and the old horse showed him the way, and Feizi left.

After returning home, Yingying and her grandfather blamed herself for being fourteen or fifteen years old and having no ability, and bombarded herself to go out to ask for food. Lao Ma returned home without a mouthful of food and water, and was kicked out by his family (his father). He was so hungry that he had nowhere to go, and the grassroots wild vegetables in Yingge Valley had already been hollowed out by the villagers, where did he go to ask for food?

There is nothing in the burlap bag, he is dozens of miles away from home, he didn't eat the previous bite, he didn't eat a bite yesterday, and he didn't eat another bite today, the old horse sat in the wasteland of Zhao's homeland and buckled the soil lumps, and a person was so uncomfortable that he quietly wiped his tears. The two parents and one mother-in-law (Lao Ma's grandmother) and the three young siblings below can only come out to be beggars by themselves, but these years the villages and villages are burying people, where does he go to beg for food with a half-old doll...... The old horse dug a pit for himself in the ground, and when he saw the sun, he continued to ask for food, and he couldn't see it, so he simply slept in the pit and kicked his feet clean......

At four o'clock in the afternoon, Yangyang Kindergarten was out of school, and the girl grabbed the iron door and couldn't wait for her grandfather to appear. At half past four, Mr. Zhao called Grandpa Yangyang, but who knew that Lao Ma's mobile phone rang twice, and the third time it ran out of power.

"What's wrong with your grandfather? I just registered his number yesterday, and now I am out of contact! "Teacher Zhao is in a hurry.

"Grandpa...... Grandpa is dizzy! After being asked several times by the teacher, Yangyang suddenly recalled a clue.

"What? When was this? Teacher Zhao asked alertly.

"When I was in school."

"What's wrong with Grandpa?"

"My grandfather...... My grandfather ...... 'Grandpa has to hold on to the wall and walk, Grandpa is dizzy'......" The girl carrying the schoolbag performed like a decent terrain body, and this performance amused Mr. Zhao.

Teacher Zhao hurriedly called Yangyang's mother, Gui Ying couldn't leave, and contacted Zhiyuan like a serial cannon. After receiving the call, Zhiyuan swept a bicycle and went to kindergarten. At half past five, I took my daughter home and gave some snacks, and when I went to see the old man, the old man was unconscious, and when Zhiyuan touched the pillow, the pillow under the old man's head was so wet that it could ooze water. As soon as he touched his body, his feet were cold and his hair was hot, He Zhiyuan took a thick quilt from the storage compartment under his bed and covered it with the old man, and quickly made an appointment with a doctor in the community hospital between the body temperatures.

Lao Ma's condition met the conditions for the community doctor to visit him for free at 24 o'clock, and after listening to the family's description of the seriousness of the situation, the community doctor arrived half an hour later.

"You...... Thirty-nine degrees five! It's burning badly! The air has cooled down, you should pay attention to keeping the elderly warm! The doctor looked disgusted, and then took the medicine from the medicine box and took the needle. After a skin injection, three tablets of different colors were taken, and then the two helped the old man up to feed the medicine together.

"I'm afraid you'll have to go to the hospital with me, I don't have much medicine here, so I have to prescribe a few things. The old man is old, and the fever cannot be delayed. The doctor put away the box and rushed to He Zhiyuan.

"Okay." At six o'clock, Zhiyuan settled his daughter and followed the doctor out to get medicine.

At half past seven, Zhiyuan hurried home, fed the old man two more pills, changed the pillow, and covered the quilt, so that he had time to ask his daughter why the bandages were on her head. Helplessly, the middle-aged man went out again, one to change the medicine in the bandage for Yangyang, and the other to find dinner for the old man. When He Zhiyuan came home at almost nine o'clock, the old man was still sleepy, shouting that he woke up to eat and didn't want to eat, and the old man who poured water fell asleep again, and the sleeping old man occasionally whimpered twice in his mouth, and occasionally called someone's name in his mouth.

After Zhiyuan settled his daughter to sleep, he immediately boiled a pot of rice porridge. At ten o'clock, when the son came back, the father and son woke up the old man together, one supporting the heavy and tall body, and the other holding a bowl to feed the porridge.