Chapter VIII

Back to the cottage where I recently stayed. Close the 'door' and I threw myself into the arms of the fourth master. Buried in his 'chest'. I don't want to say a word. I just want to hold him so firmly. I just want to watch him so quietly.

Feel his temperature. His heartbeat. And this really holds his sense of security and steadiness.

The fourth master felt my emotions. Gently put your arms around me. Patted me on the back: "Good. I'm here."

I let out a muffled "um". Still reluctant to speak.

The hand of the fourth master. Wrap your arms around my waist. A little push. Just pick me up. Go to the bed and sit down. I nestled in his arms like a helpless child. Sit on his 'lap'. Wrap your arms around his neck. The tip of his nose was against his neck.

The fourth master didn't speak. Just hugging me quietly. Stay with me. Let me just rely on him and rely on him.

That's what I want most. Besides. At this moment. I don't have any more luxuries. The room was so quiet. It's all our heartbeats for each other.

My heart gradually calmed down. The exhaustion of a long time came rushing in. Let me fall asleep in this warm and safe arms.

Open your eyes again. I'm lying on the 'bed'. is still nestled in the arms of the fourth master.

The fourth master gently 'kissed' and 'kissed' the corners of my eyes: "Wake up."

I let out an aggrieved "um" in my voice.

The fourth master asked me, "Why are you still crying when you fall asleep?"

I cried. I raised my hand to 'touch' and 'touch' the corner of my eye. Not really. This piece of cold wetness. It's not what tears are.

I coquettishly nestled into the arms of the fourth master: "I've been so tired lately...... It's really tiring, it's tired...... Fourth Brother ......"

"What's wrong. Coming back from where you went to Mount Wutai. You're busy taking care of the royal grandmother. I haven't seen you in months. You're so skinny. The imperial grandmother is sick. You don't look haggard."

"When in Wutai Mountain. I had a dream......"

"What a dream."

I quietly told the fourth master about that dream. The fourth master listened quietly.

Wait until I'm done. The fourth master gently patted me on the back and coaxed: "Don't be afraid, don't be afraid...... Someday. I'll marry you back. Let you be my only wife...... We're going to have many, many children. Nothing like that will happen. I won't let you leave me. Definitely won't let go of yours. Biluo Yellow Spring. I'll be pestering you. Definitely won't give you a chance to leave me."

"If it's a 'girl'. It's called 'jade' Zhen."

"Okay."

"My son's name is Hongjue."

"Okay."

"Isn't it okay for you to say whatever I say?"

The fourth master gently 'kissed' and 'kissed' my forehead. Smiled and said to me, "What you want. I'll give it all to you. As long as you don't want to leave me. I'll give you whatever you want."

"Then I'm going to be a Fujin."

"Okay."

"I want you to take a year off 'jade' Yao."

"Okay."

"I'm going to be a queen in the future."

"Okay."

"I want you to spoil me alone."

"Okay."

"I want all the good food, the fun, the good looks. I want you to go around with me. I'm going to Gangnam. I'm going to Tibet. I'm going to the Tianshan Mountains to see the snow lotus."

The fourth master smiled and looked at me, completely messing around with willful 'sex'. He said to me dotingly, "Okay. It's all good."

I 'pumped' and 'pumped' my nose: "You spoil me too much. It's going to spoil me."

"Spoiled. You'll have to stay with me. No one else can snatch it away. You don't want to be with people who don't spoil you as much as I do." The fourth master's 'kiss' fell lightly between my eyebrows: "This red lotus. It's beautiful. It makes you even more 'confused'."

"This red lotus. It was pierced with cinnabar. Finely dense. It's all scripture." I remembered again. A master of idiocy who exhausted his heart and soul for the sake of this red lotus......

The fourth master doesn't know the secret. Said gently: "This red lotus is very good. Scripture pierced. More lining for you. You are a Buddha-like person with a good heart. The scriptures are worthy of your goodness. You're stunningly beautiful, too. It's not that 'glamorous'. But there is your unusual surprise and agility. This red lotus is made of the best cinnabar. It's like a 'color' that spreads out of the skin, as if it is dancing with a burning flame. The most delicate for you. And the warmth you give people."

"Are you complimenting me?"

"yes."

I nestled quietly in his arms. Didn't speak again.

The fourth master knows that I am being coquettish. And he did not speak. Coax me. Gently patted me on the back.

I'm really tired......

Too tired too tired......

Since March after receiving a letter from the Master of Idiotism. I never felt any more relaxed.

So many emotions in my heart. But to keep a calm face every day. I can't cry, I can't talk...... No one to rely on.

The Queen Mother for so many years. That's how it feels......

I couldn't help but say, "Fourth brother. I am so tired...... I can't cry. Can't say...... It's the dead of night. I'm so sad that I can't sleep...... But I can't talk to anyone...... Or do you want to be 'spirited'...... Fourth Brother...... I'm so tired......"

So ah. Fourth Master. Can you love me all the time. Always with me. I will not leave you. You don't leave me either. We. Don't be so lonely anymore. All right.

"'Jade'. Don't get tired. Don't be afraid...... I will always be with you. I've always loved you...... No matter how much suffering there is. You can tell me. How many hundreds of turns and thousands of times in my heart. You can let me know. I'll share it with you. It's like you share my anguish......"

He held my face. Look me in the eye. Tell me seriously. Then bow your head. Sealed with a 'kiss'......

A 'kiss' is long. A 'kiss' is deep. I wept in his 'kiss'. I found a kind of redemption in his 'kiss'...... Just like that day. I'm almost crazy. See the 'kiss' marks he left behind. I was able to calm down again......

The fourth master let go of my 'lips'.' Kiss 'to the tears in the corners of my eyes: "'Jade'. Don't be afraid of anything. Don't cry ......."

"Fourth brother. Do you know. The day I knew that 'Yu' Yao was pregnant. I almost went crazy with jealousy. I'm standing in the tub. Hu 'messy' tantrums. But all of a sudden, I calmed down......"

"Hmm." The fourth master encouraged me to continue.

I kept my head down. Don't dare to look him in the eyes: "I see myself reflected in the water. Right shoulder below. There are 'kiss' marks you left behind...... Then I remembered what you said. You say you only love me. Only love me...... Then I suddenly fell silent......"

The fourth master lifted my face in distress. Gently and delicately landed on my forehead, the tip of my nose, my lips, and finally. His 'lips' were against mine. Whisper: "I'll keep telling you. I only love you. Only love you. Only love you. Before I met you. I didn't think about falling in love with anyone. After meeting you. I'll never fall in love with anyone again.' Jade'er. My 'jade'...... You are in this world. The only thing I love ......"

That's fine. That's fine......

Calmed down for a while. The fourth master put his arm around me and asked, "The situation of the imperial grandmother. Isn't it good?"

I shook my head: "Three meals a day of soup 'medicine' poured down. But it didn't get any better. No amount of elixir will only make the decay of the body a little slower. She eats less and less. Sometimes they even refuse to eat. I'll be here for you. She's in a good mood. Anyway, I ate more. But you should see it too. She didn't eat as much as half as she used to......"

The fourth master sighed: "How can this be ......?"

"Probably. There's nothing that can make her nostalgic enough to be willing to work hard in this world......"

"Imperial Grandmother. It's after the emperor left. The best person in this house for me...... If there is no her care. I probably won't be the Prince Yong I am today. Huang Ama doesn't like me. Even disgusted with me. If it weren't for the emperor's love for me. How could he be willing to reward me...... What's more. She also sent Thirteen to me. And send you to me...... I've lived my life. In addition to the emperor's mother. It's the most ...... my grandmother gave me."

The fourth master reminisced about the past. The look on his face was a little nostalgic. A little nostalgic. There is still a bit of sadness......

We all let out a long sigh. Hugging each other tightly. I'm sure he had the same thought in his heart at this time. We were all saying to each other in our hearts, "Don't let me lose you again...... The world is so big. But it's so cold...... You are my favorite. It's also the warmest ...... I've ever had."

The weather turns cooler at the end of September. It's colder than when I came back fifty-one years ago...... A chilly wind blew in through the crack in the window. The fourth master sighed: "This winter...... It's going to be cold......"

The winter of that year. It's really cold. From every trace of air. It's cold all the way to the bottom of people's hearts. It's like a blowing wind. It's like you're going to freeze everything. And me and the fourth master. But they can only look at each other from afar. Can't snuggle up to each other. Keep each other warm......

Fortunately. When you love him and are loved by him. Just a glance from afar. It's enough to make a cold heart. Feel a touch of warmth......

We just stayed there for a while. Didn't say anything more. As if everything is superfluous. We're all tired. Lean quietly on each other. Such a break. That's what we need at this point.

I leaned on the arms of the fourth master. I remembered a sentence I once saw: wait until one day. You meet someone. You don't say anything to each other. Just quietly stay with each other. But I don't feel embarrassed. Instead, the inner peace is content. At that time. You know. You've met the right person.

That's how it feels between me and the fourth master. Not embarrassing. It's peaceful......

After lunch. The fourth master had to leave the palace. He has been building a mansion for many years. It's not good to stay in the harem for too long. Even if it is to do your filial piety in front of your grandmother. You can't break the rules.

After lunch. I brought the 'medicine' bowl to serve the queen mother to drink the 'medicine'. Feed the Queen Mother with her own hands and drink the soup 'medicine'.

Just this once. Later. It also became the last ......

A few days later. The Queen Mother's condition suddenly worsened. Kangxi Ye dragged the sick body. Despite his swollen feet, he can barely walk. Take care of the food and drink in front of the Queen Mother every day. Hand feed the 'medicine'.

He even cried in front of the Queen Mother: "I lost my mother when I was young. It was the emperor's mother who raised me as her own son. I still remember being sick. It's the emperor's mother who never sleeps. Undressed, accompany him in front of the 'bed' to take care of his son until he recovers. Huang Eniang. Son begs you. It's going to get better......"

This kind of true feeling is 'revealed', but I can't help but cry......