Xiaoxia, my mother used to feel that she would have a lot of time to spend with you in the future, so I don't have to worry about everything I will talk to you about endlessly. However, the world is unpredictable, and what was once taken for granted has now become a luxury.

Mom has always felt that she can remember more things when she was a child than the people around her, especially the psychological feelings of being a child. Since I had you, my mother has felt that these mental journeys are very precious. Now my mother hopes that when she has not completely become an adult and has not completely forgotten the confusion and likes and dislikes when she was a child, she will share her mother's shyness and hesitation, recklessness and timidity with you as much as possible, hoping to grow up with you again.

It's no joke to say that I'm growing up with you. Mom sometimes feels that she is just getting bigger and older, but she is not mature, or rather, the way Mom does things is still the way of a child. Adults Stone is used to doing things, but my mother is still slowly adapting to it.

It sounds like mom wants to be more mature, mom, please don't think like that just yet. Xiaoxia, in fact, what my mother wants to tell you is that the way of adults is not necessarily correct and better, and the way of children is not necessarily wrong and bad. In many cases, it is just a different perspective, and there is no distinction between good and bad, right and wrong.

Mom forced herself yesterday to do something that she had never done before, in what Mom thought was an adult. Now that I taste it, I can't tell what it tastes like for a while. So here I want to share it with you, I hope you can experience the mystery with your mother.

Last night, Mom wrote to your grandmother hoping to get your birth certificate. This document is necessary information for your mother to buy a new house, and it is used to confirm that you are the direct heir of your mother's house. When I negotiated with your dad that day, my mom didn't get it for various reasons, so I went to ask your grandma.

When writing the letter, my mother wanted to keep her tone and tone at a certain distance, and just talk about things with each other. But when the content was finished, my mother paused, lost in memories and thoughts. I remember that your grandmother used to say that your mother should use honorifics when talking to her, and she should not use you at the beginning, but use you. The tone should also be toned, and it is the attitude towards the elders. The content of my mother's writing this time has no title, and the tone is quite bland and dry, without respect and emotion.

Xiao Xia, I'm really a little afraid of your ridicule, this is the first time in my mother's life, and it's really the first time I've thought about whether my way of doing things can help me achieve my goals. Writing it now, I almost blush for my childish thinking. People in their thirties have never customized their behavior and language to achieve a certain goal, and they are really arrogant adults. Don't get me wrong here, my mother's shame is not because she did it wrong, but because she is ashamed, or surprised, that she has not learned the survival skills she should have for so many years in this adult world and in such strict game rules. I remember that my father used to joke with my mother, saying that I didn't know how my mother grew up so big. Yesterday's reflection turned out to be the first time my mother felt the same way.

Dad used to often reveal it, and even made it clear to Mom, that in the adult world, everything you do and say has a purpose. If you should do this in order to achieve your goal, if you should say this, then you have to choose this way. Achieving the goal is greater than everything, and whether there is a slight violation of the intention in the process will be wiped out in an instant when the goal is achieved.

Mom scoffed at this before. Now that I think about it, maybe Dad did have a point. Mom's previous resistance may have been just because of the example that Dad took, which was too unpleasing to Mom.

Dad told Mom that he was torn between lonely or confused middle-aged women or young girls because Dad saw that after they were simply accompanied or teased by Dad, they would indeed treat your dad with feminine simplicity at critical moments. For him, this brings tangible benefits. Dad often gives an example of a middle-aged female colleague, cares about her, thinks of her in big and small things, and almost does not cost anything, but when it comes to borrowing money, or when there is nothing to take and take red envelopes, it can come from her, and there is an endless stream. As for the father of these women themselves, in his own words, he has no feelings, just to take advantage of them. And my mother kept being jealous for these used objects at that time, which was really childish.

Although what he said was true, my mother didn't buy my father's egoistic account at all. To your father, it's like talking to a chicken and a duck, and playing the piano to a cow. When my mother thinks about it now, I don't know why, but I always think this kind of dialogue scene is very funny. Reasoning with your mother like this, but not being used, is also a pity that your father worked hard to educate back then.

But Xiao Xia, in these descriptions of her mother, it is very subjective. Mom hopes that you don't easily decide right and wrong, or positive and negative roles. You have been far away from your mother, and after listening to the stories of these people close to you, please don't easily stand in the line and fight to the end. People often have very complex relationships with each other, and it's best not to make a decision about right or wrong.

Returning to the letter I wrote to my grandmother, it made my mother think for the first time about what kind of behavior should be in line with her own goals, and how to achieve them. In the end, with an uncomfortable and awkward feeling, my mother changed the letter to a warm, honorific version and sent it out. Unlike what I thought, after the letter was sent, my mother actually had a sense of accomplishment brought by growth. And soon, my mother received a reply from my grandmother. Although I didn't get a certificate in the end, the atmosphere was peaceful.

If you look at it from the perspective of a bystander, my mother finds that her confusion when she was seven or eight years old has not been answered until she is in her thirties. When my mother was a child, she always wondered why we couldn't behave like this when we didn't like to greet others with a smile and be with us. And the purpose of creating a harmonious atmosphere, how much happiness can bring us, can always be directly and nakedly placed in front of us. When my mother was a child, she asked her grandmother why she couldn't go and say hello to her aunt she hated, and when faced with this question, her grandmother ignored the past as if she hadn't heard it at all. Later, when I asked about it, my mother still received an inaudible performance and a little boredom. Today's mother, I feel that my heart has never left the scene of questioning, and my mother has never changed since then, and her heart has been sealed since then, and she will no longer grow up. Until now, my mother still wants someone who can patiently explain to my mother, why do you want to do what you don't want to do, will it really bring more benefits? And I, do I really need so many benefits? So what is the calculation of my sacrificial heart?

Xiao Xia, you and your mother are destined to grow up in completely different worlds. The kindness and sophistication of Dad and Grandma may make you completely unaware of the confusion of Mom's childhood and the confusion of adulthood. Mom just wants that if you do something against your will, then please find a reasonable explanation for yourself, just like your dad did, even if some of the truth even sounds a little utilitarian or selfish, but at least you have to convince yourself. As long as you think you're willing to do it, or willing to sacrifice some superficial effort for the sake of your goals, then as long as you are aligned in your actions, your mom will support you.