Soon after I reported to school, I met a classmate who lived in the village next door to my grandmother's house, which was called Jibian, which belonged to Xiyuan Village.

On Sunday afternoon, I made an appointment to wait in Laohuibu, and met the girls alone, and there was a teenager left over from junior high school who was shy, and he was too embarrassed to speak.

This classmate was much shorter than me, and I rode so fast that she finally caught up and shouted at me to stop, because I had taken a fork in the road, and had gone quite far, and this allusion became one of the things that we had to make fun of when we got together.

This road has become a winding stone road in the mountains at the border between Huibu and Luo City, some places can be ridden, some places must be walked hand in hand, apparently the main passage before the liberation, by that time there were few people walking, a few years ago I visited the old place, but I could not find even a trace of it.

Along the way, I also passed two fellow scholars, a man and a woman, the male classmate belonged to the village of Huibu at the border, and there were a few kumquat trees with branches hanging in front of the door, and the female classmate was in the Yin village belonging to Luo City, and a stone road passed through her door.

Since then, the four of us have been invited home and back to school together many times, but more often we go alone, and there are always some special circumstances, such as something at home or the money for the meal ticket is spent, and it is impossible to be together every time.

When traveling alone, that section of the stone road, always feel particularly deep and silent, alone or walking or riding, almost never encountered pedestrians, one side of the mountain forest waves, one side of the river reeds waves, there is the wind whistling deafening, there is also the sound of water murmuring resonance, the most peculiar thing is that every time you can see one or two eagles hovering in the sky, each time will follow its free soaring posture to watch for a long time.

A month before the college entrance examination, all the courses have already been completed, and the rest of the time is basically self-study, and the students are very conscious and hard-working, although most of them know that there is no hope of going on to higher education, although the teachers rarely come to class, and rarely see the noise and laughter.

I also tried hard to read, and my eyesight dropped sharply because of this, considering that I might not be able to check the army, and I had to put down my books, there was definitely no hope for the entrance examination, and if I couldn't become a soldier, I really didn't know how to go in the future.

Many times, I stare at the bird outside the window for self-study until it can't see, thinking about using this method to restore my eyesight, but the effect is still there, and by the time I apply for a physical examination, my binocular vision can reach the passing line.

There are some people like me who think like this, in addition to protecting their eyesight, they will also actively exercise, and it is at this time that they can start to do a few single parallel bars.

Once, when I was sparring with a big man who had transferred to another school, I was punched hard, and my eyes were full of anger, and the classroom was chased in circles, which caused a burst of laughter from the classmates, and a female classmate with a good temper was busy persuading us to leave.

During this period, I, along with the other three classmates in the same class, participated in the recruitment examination organized by the county, and the examination went relatively smoothly, and I was told that I was admitted, and since then I have more expectations, which has become the most gratifying thing during that time.

The college entrance examination is approaching, and a few days before the exam, I packed my belongings, put them in the wooden box that I have been with since junior high school, and rode my bicycle alone, preparing to take these things home first, and the rest of the bedding and the like, which I can bring back at one time after the college entrance examination.

Others are seizing the moment to make the final sprint, and I have foreseen my own results. When walking through the playground, the teachers and students are in the classroom or office, the blue court of the University of Nuo, the empty football field, empty, so deserted, so bleak.

I glanced up at the classroom and found that the deputy class leader was standing alone by the railing, waving and smiling at me, the day before yesterday I mentioned to my classmates that I was going to leave today, and no one else cared, but she had a heart, a trace of warmth at the lowest point, which has been imprinted in my heart since then and can never be forgotten.

Carrying a big wooden box, riding alone on the stone road at the junction of the two townships, the mountains and forests are more secluded, the reed flowers are flying all over the sky, and the lonely goshawk meets again unexpectedly, and has been hovering overhead, not knowing where it is going to fly.

The college entrance examination was finally over, and I didn't even have the courage to look at the results, so I packed my bags and went home alone, and became a young man in a mountain village again.

My father persuaded me to repeat my studies, but I insisted on enlisting in the army, and it was not that I had no hard work in high school, and the foundation of junior high school was not solid, and no matter how hard I tried, it was difficult to get good grades, but my eyesight dropped sharply because of this.

insisted on enlisting in the army, or because I failed the college entrance examination, and from then on I would really face the society and step into the society, and I was obviously not ready for this. chose to go to the army, in fact, out of fear of reality, with a little fear and wanted to escape.

Reality is reality, you can't escape if you want to, there are often eight or nine unsatisfactory things, I was admitted to recruitment, and the other three classmates went to the unit to report, but I couldn't wait for news, and later I learned that being admitted is not equal to hiring, but also having a preparation.

My father didn't experience it, and I didn't know what to do after I learned about it, so I asked my classmates, and the result of the question was that I had to go to the county to get the establishment, and the unit would receive it after I got it.

In order to implement the recruitment, he ran back and forth to the county many times, sometimes alone, sometimes following his parents, aimlessly, like a headless fly.

During this period, I lived in the house of "Jiang Han" for a few days, and he participated in the recruitment like me, and was successfully admitted, guiding me to many ways to "go through the back door".

He also lived in the house of "Beluga" for a few days, his parents were township leaders, and he had a bit of a connection, and he worked at the local hydropower station as soon as he graduated. With a unique momentum and arrogance, they were not enthusiastic about their son's classmates, and seemed a little indifferent, "Beluga" was afraid that I would not be able to stand it, so he took me to sleep in the duty room of the unit, and spent a few nights accompanied by the huge roar of the engine.

At the end of the year, he participated in the conscription physical examination, and there was only one place under the enlistment of commercial grain accounts.

The reason for the small number of places for enlistment in the army is that the policy at that time stipulated that after enlisting in the army, they could be assigned jobs and would not be affected by the establishment, and it became a shortcut for many children of low-level workers to solve work problems.

followed his father to implement the policy and became a commercial grain, but in just a few years of junior high school, he felt a little glory of status, because in the eyes of the neighbors, he was already a city person, and the country had a work arrangement.

After graduating from high school, I couldn't recruit workers, and I couldn't get a share of the land when I went home, and even becoming a soldier became an obstacle.

Commodity grain eventually became a historical word, now called the non-agricultural hukou, compared with the agricultural hukou, there is no special feature, but it is inferior, because the agricultural hukou can still be divided into mountains and fields in the hometown.

Perhaps in that era, the children who followed their parents to solve the "commercial grain" household registration can be called the "second generation of grain", the "second generation of grain" born in the seventies is destined to be a declining generation, or it may be a generation that has become a swan song, not as good as "***" and "rich second generation", they are only short-lived in history, and they have since drowned the long river of time.

After failing to recruit and enlisting in the army, I suddenly found that my idol, my father, when I was a child, faced with social reality, knew almost nothing, he didn't have many acquaintances, he didn't have a wide range of relationships, he wouldn't ask for help, and he hit a wall almost everywhere.

The idol in my heart collapsed, and the rebellious psychology grew rapidly, staying at home and arguing with my parents almost every day, talking freely, saying that my parents were useless, saying that I didn't read good books, because my parents didn't care about us, and saying that I couldn't go to work in the factory and couldn't go to the army, and that my parents were incompetent.

My parents were powerless to defend themselves and tried to reason with me, but I couldn't listen to anything they had to say, and I would do the opposite of whatever they decided.

During that time, the mood fell to the bottom, and it was a real bottom valley where I didn't know where to go in the future, and I didn't know the future and feared that I couldn't find a job, and it was very likely that I would become the bottom valley of a mountain people.

The two setbacks made me more determined to enlist in the army, there is no pure land in the world, my generation cannot enter the stream, and the teaching of primary school textbooks is only "I want to be a PLA when I grow up" can be realized.

If you don't get into college, won't you get nothing in three years of high school life? Is it really useless to study without being admitted to university? After fifteen years of schooling, after reading books for such a time, do you really want to be like a friend who has read books for four or five years, from now on with his face to the loess and his back to the sky, and become a farmer again?

Since failing in the college entrance examination, questions have been swirling in my mind, not only the regret of unsuccessful efforts, but also the fear of being ridiculed by my neighbors.

For a while, I didn't listen to what my parents told me to do, and I was a maverick, maybe my parents understood, or maybe they couldn't do anything about me, unless they had to, and no longer asked me to work in the fields.

Sometimes a person climbs up to the attic, digs out his father's college textbooks, and reads them one by one, thinking about whether he can be self-taught, and deduce a strong growth similar to "Paul Kochakin", and for the first time he sees calculus, and discovers that chemistry and physics are also available in universities, and he can really understand them.

Sometimes with a thick selection of great people, I go to the wild mountains, forests and grasslands alone, reading word by word, wanting to see how great men can be extraordinary, and wanting to absorb a little inspiration from them to guide my future life.

Sometimes I closed the door, took out my father's brush and inkstone, and practiced calligraphy with ink, which was the longest time, persisting for two or three months, and the pen writing made a lot of progress.

During this period, in order to prove that he had seen a different side of the world, he once wore a floral shirt and mixed in the local "billiard room" with a strong body, chatting freely with the coastal migrant workers who returned to their hometowns, as a trend leader in a place.

It was also in this kind of contact and conversation that I learned about the excitement of my part-time job, which contributed to my short part-time job journey later, and I once fantasized about an alternative growth.

Many years later, I came into contact with the elementary school and junior high school classmates who had talked freely back then, and when I learned that I was admitted to the military school, he asked in the first sentence, whether the test was a technical secondary school or a junior college, and after affirming that it was a junior college, he said again and again, "You have ambition and ambition, and you really surpassed your father." ”

It turned out to be in the conversation, I don't know where the confidence came from, the college entrance examination failed, and I still firmly mentioned to him that I wanted to surpass my father, I don't remember this matter, but he took it seriously, his father was a college student in the sixties, and he was an unsurpassable benchmark in his hometown.

This makes me Hao Yan, if I don't do it, maybe I will meet again, and what I will wait for is not a continuous compliment, but a smile.