11

What kind of being is my aunt to me?

When I was a child, the prime minister gave me the clothes worn by his concubines, and he never thought of buying me a new one. It was my aunt who secretly gave me one or two pieces every time she received a reward from the emperor.

When Su Jinxiu pushed me into the water, everyone in the Prime Minister's Mansion said that I fell off by myself. Only my aunt believed in me and believed that Su Jinxiu pushed me down.

Later, other people's little girls went out to play with their parents. My aunt knows that the prime minister is busy every day, and my aunt doesn't want to see me. He often organizes some banquets, or takes a group of ladies to enjoy the flowers outside the city. Just to give me some opportunities to go out and play.

She even gave me a kite on one occasion. It was my first toy. I was reluctant to fly it, for fear that the kite would fly away and I would not be able to come back. As a result, when he took it back to the house, he was torn by Su Jinxiu.

I whipped her with a little leather whip and watched her cry and cry for her mother. My grandmother cursed me loudly.

The prime minister had no choice but to come out of the study and said, what if she broke your kite? You're not out of money? It's a big deal to buy another one, as for hitting her?

But he never knew that in that case, it would no longer be this kite.

Later, I breathed wind and rain in Kyoto and became an invincible little overlord. All people spit on me, and when they see me, they avoid me like a snake and a scorpion. Only my aunt had a pitiful look every time she saw me.

But I don't want to be pitied.

I've pretended to be so strong, I don't need to be pitied.

Can...... I also want to be distressed. Aunt.

Auntie, you're gone, what should Tang Tang do?

Lu Ke, he's a villain, aunt, Tang Tang has been in prison for so many days, and he hasn't even seen me.

Auntie, I've really thought about it, otherwise I'd like him.

I really, thought about it.

12

I still didn't wait for Lu Ke.

It was Su Jinxiu who came.

She was there to tell me that she had become the general's wife.

"Oh."

I cowered in the corner, my tone inaudible to anger.

Su Jinxiu was not happy.

Although she is a concubine, she has always been the pride of the sky. Born to be superior in any aspect.

At that time, relying on my cleverness, I snatched the position of the general's wife that she was about to get her hands on. Now, I'm down. She's going to take it back.

So I became a prisoner. And she will soon become the general's wife.

Su Jinxiu has always been the envy of girls in Kyoto, how could I, a person who was born destined to be in the mud, trample her under my feet?

I lost this game at the beginning.

She said that she would marry as the prime minister's concubine.

"Oh."

My tone was unfazed.

When she saw that I didn't respond, she was leaving.

I still didn't give up: "I want to call Lu Ke." ”

She didn't speak, but I knew she heard.

The man next door asked me, "What is the relationship between Lu Ke, the general of the dynasty, and you?" ”

I was silent.

"We used to be husband and wife."

"And now?"

……

I do not know.

I think I still like him. After all, he was the first person to be nice to me besides my aunt.

By the time I knew it was all an illusion, I already liked him.

13

Lu Ke is here.

I don't know whether to be happy or sad.

Su Jinxiu must have gone to find him. Therefore, for the sake of Su Jinxiu's face, he thought about coming over.

I watched him walk into his cell, dressed in a crescent-white gown. It's exactly the same as the first time I met him.

However, in the end, something has changed.

I went from being a demon to a prisoner in the prison.

When he came, I cowered in the corner.

I heard him shout, "Jintang." ”

I couldn't control my tears.

When he doesn't come, I expect him to come. But now that he's here, I'm afraid he's coming.

Afraid, he saw such a me. Like this, my clothes are dirty and my hair is messy.

"Jintang. It's me. He called again and stopped at the door of my cell.

We have been married for two years, and although there is no husband and wife relationship, he has never said a word to me.

Every word, every word, was as gentle as it is now.

Lu Ke, Lu Ke.

I wish you scolded me. Wake me up, maybe I won't like you anymore.

I took a few deep breaths and stopped sobbing. I knew he was waiting for me to come over.

But I can't.

I said, "General, dirty." ”

He didn't speak.

But he didn't move. The dungeon was too dim for me to make out his expression.

I guess he must be dirty. After all, such a noble person.

"General, let me go."

I hid in the shadows of my cell, he couldn't see me, I couldn't see him.

"Let me go. I promise you that in this life, I will never come to Kyoto again. ”

He still didn't speak.

I finally lost my breath and started crying.

Actually, I really wanted to die when I left. But I can't rest assured that Lu Ke will not go. I hate myself so much, I hate myself for thinking that whatever others give me, it is my light.

"Lu Ke, have you never liked me?"

He didn't hear it either.

Because when I said it, he had just come out of his cell.

14

But I don't really have to die.

He seemed to have really gone to the emperor to intercede.

Then, one night, two men pulled me out of the prison and stuffed me into a wagon.

When I passed by the Prime Minister's Mansion, I asked them to stop.

I didn't get out of the car, I just listened.

The lights inside were bright, and Su Jinxiu was preparing to marry Lu Ke. The mother-in-law's voice was also pleased.

It was someone else's harmony, and from now on, it has nothing to do with me.

I was finally alone.

"Let's go."

So the carriage slowly departed. I lowered the curtain as well.

The car didn't stop all the way until it reached Jiangnan.

I used the money Lu Ke gave me to open a teahouse in Jiangnan. From the beginning of the lack of attention, to the end of the room full of guests.

I also had spare money and hired a troupe that sang and commented. If you have nothing to do, you will listen to it with the guests.

Jiangnan people say that the owner of the newly opened teahouse is a mute. No one had ever seen her say a word.

Even the matchmakers who wanted to come and match me, knowing that I couldn't speak, either gave up or went to the blind or crippled.

I rejected them all.

I can't trust anyone anymore. I don't want to delay anyone.

They all said I was dumb, but no one knew, I was just scared of people. I simply cut myself off from them.

The first two years were fine. In the third year, I suddenly began to fall ill.

First came the headache. Later, I often can't control my bite and go crazy.

I went to the doctor at the hospital and said I was depressed.

"Heart disease also requires heart medicine."

I shook my head: "There will be no heart medicine." ”

15

I closed the teahouse.

On the morning of closing, I went to the market to buy a few cans of wine. They all picked the kind of spirits that they drank for the first time in the General's Palace.

In the dead of night, I hugged the jar and began to drink. But after only half a jar of drinking, his stomach was already burning.

If...... If Lu Ke hadn't let me go at that time.

If I just die like that.

Will it feel better?

Can...... How can there be so many ifs.

I know I'm in tears, but I don't want to care. I even wondered if I would die after drinking all these jars of wine.

What is the point of living in the world for a person like me?

I sat in the corner of the wall and poured the jar into my mouth, and in a trance, it seemed as if I had returned to the time when I drank his wine for the first time in the General's Mansion.

He walked over and snatched my wine.

I finally had the opportunity to ask him, "Lu Ke, why did you save me?" ”。

He didn't speak, but I cried even harder.