During the days with Sun Keyi in the rental house, although there were also quarrels and angers, but in general we had a good time. And for me, what is going to happen next has always been something I look forward to and something I am afraid of.

Three years have passed.

It's been three years since my father left me. Looking back on the past three years, I have visited him less and less often, because I am more and more afraid to talk to him about my mother, and every time I lie to him because my mother is not in good health and cannot come to see him in person. My father would only nod silently when he heard this, and I guess he probably thought his mother was still angry with him and didn't want to visit him. And every time I held back tears, afraid to look at his apologetic eyes.

When my mother was alive, she never came to visit my father, and it was impossible for her not to be angry with him, because he was angry at a woman who had reduced herself to this, and everyone would be angry, but she would be angry, and every time I wanted to visit my father, she would carefully prepare something for me to bring with me. When I came back, she didn't ask if he was okay, but I could tell from the way she looked at my expression that she cared about her father. Mother may have always been like this, there are things that have always been held in her heart, if you don't break the things in her heart, she won't say it, and she won't take the initiative to come to you, in other words, she is too reserved in everything, and that's why I told my father that my mother couldn't come to visit him because of her poor health, and he naturally took it as an excuse that she didn't want to see him. I've been lying for more than two years.

Therefore, at the moment when I went to pick up my father with Sun Keyi, I was extremely uneasy, Sun Keyi grabbed my shaking hand tightly, and he said, "Since I have been hiding it for so long, don't talk about it yet, and we will explain it to him when we go back." ”

I actually thought the same thing in my heart, although I knew that a living person had disappeared like this, and it was ridiculous to hide this matter, but I also thought the same as Sun Keyi, at least take my father back first. My father came out with the prison guards, and it had only been two weeks since I last saw him, and his appearance had always been in my mind's eye, and he was much older and paler now than when he first entered, but in my eyes there was not much difference.

His steps were much staggerer than before, and his steps were almost trembling as he stepped out of the shadows into the sun. I saw him close his eyes suddenly, probably because the sun was too dazzling, I ran over and hugged him, and for a moment, I thought of my mother, and I couldn't stop crying.

My father also raised his hand around my back, and his broad palm stroked my back gently, and I had to tremble in his palm. I heard my father's voice, and he said, "Okay, girl, stop crying." ”

Sun Keyi was standing next to me, he knew that I was crying not only because I saw my father again, but also because of my mother, and he was afraid that I would leak my mouth, so he said, "Uncle Xu, let's go back first." ”

My father was frightened by my tears, and he echoed Sun Keyi, "Yes, go back first." ”

So I let go of my father, and his face glowed pale in the sun, and my heart ached again.

Back at the rental house, I was busy cleaning up my father's room, and Sun Keyi was with him in the living room.

When I first entered the door, my father poked his head inside, he seemed to imagine what kind of attitude my mother would have towards him, he might have even thought about how to face my mother's reproach or excitement, but the house was empty, and he lost a little in his eyes, but he still walked in, maybe my mother would come out of the kitchen in a while, but there was still no one, Sun Keyi and I were silent, and did not say anything.

When I came out of the room, Sun Keyi looked at me with a pleading look. My father's face was very bad, and he asked me, "Qijun, what's wrong with your mother?" Is she still mad at me? Or is she really sick and now in the hospital, don't try to hide it from me. ”

The moment I heard my father talk about my mother, my tears fell, and I knew that I couldn't hide it after all, but I hadn't figured out how to tell my father about it. Through the blurry tears, I saw my father's whole body trembling slightly, and he said, "You say. ”

I walked up to my father, my legs were so weak that I couldn't stand upright, I simply fell to my knees, and my voice trembled and I said, "Dad, Mom was sick while you were in prison. ”

My father said, "What hospital is she in?" Saying that, he stood up and took his coat to go out, "Which hospital is she in, I went to her, and I apologized to her in person." ”

I walked forward on my knees and grabbed his legs, and this time I burst into tears, and I said, "Mom, she's gone." ”

"Leave?"

The legs I was holding shook a little, I knelt on the ground and was dragged forward by my father, he was about to rush out of the door, I hugged him tightly, he said, "Qijun, what are you talking about, your mother is fine, how can she leave?" You let go of Dad, I'm going to find her, you let go. ”

My father, who wept bitterly for the first time in front of me, cried out "Impossible, impossible." "On the other hand, they wanted to break free from me and go to my mother.

Maybe before he was released from prison, he even thought about how to apologize to my mother, how to make her happy so that she would not be angry with him anymore, and he played it out thousands of times in his mind, how he should explain it to her with her personality. He even planned his future life, no longer caring about the gains and losses of these years, and enjoying his old age with her. But all of this was impossible in my phrase 'she left'. It turned out that he had long lost the opportunity to coax her like a child again, and it turned out that the three years he missed were actually missing his life with her. But he didn't even see her when she was gone, and he didn't even know when she needed him most. What kind of pain she should have endured, he didn't dare to imagine, he might never forgive himself in this life, he thought that the most foolish thing he had ever done in his life was to secretly help his childhood sweetheart behind her back, but he didn't expect that the biggest mistake in his life was not to accompany her to the end. He didn't expect that the punishment given to him by God would be so cruel.

Then, I heard him sigh softly, "It's over, my life is over." ”

I hugged my father harder, I was afraid that he would do something to hurt himself, and I said, "Dad, don't do this, I beg you, don't do this." I heard his voice, and he said, "Qijun, let go of Dad, I'm going to accompany your mother." ”

I cried and shook my head, and the more I cried, the more fierce I became, and I said, "No, don't." I kept repeating those two words, holding his leg desperately.