I can't forget that Wednesday night, when I asked for help to no avail, I resolutely broke into the consultation room, unable to imagine what would happen later, and there was only one thought left in my heart, and this thought was like a maggot planted in the flesh, and every minute and second of squirming was to occupy more territory.

It's time to see what the consulting room looks like, I thought.

Before graduating, at least you should know what that room is like, what the person who receives you in the room will look like, and you can make up your mind to be admitted to the university in vain, and it took four years to get what you wanted, leave home, and come to this city commonly known as the southernmost city in the north and the northernmost in the south - S City.

However, when I pushed the door open, there was a retaining wall directly in front of me and a doorway opening on the left. Through the doorway, I saw a little boy of eight or nine years old, standing next to a square sand table, and suddenly began to hesitate again.

My eyes met the little boy's clear pupils, ashamed and afraid of self-blame...... Suddenly tumbling rushed to my brain, my legs seemed to be filled with lead, and I took timid steps, and quickly shifted my gaze to the back of the female teacher who said "please come in" just now.

It's a dark room, flanked by the teachers' offices, and behind the retaining wall is about a computer room.

"What's the matter?" A thirty-five or sixteen-year-old female teacher turned her head and asked. She wore long hair, gold-trimmed eye sockets, a light blue and white striped sports blouse, and dark blue jeans.

"I ····· I want to..."

What else could it be? Not all of those who come here have mental problems. Does this also have to be asked knowingly?

I couldn't speak for a while, my thoughts were tormented, and I couldn't pour out a complete sentence.

"I... Some of the problems ....... ”

Since the second year of junior high school, I don't like to talk, and now I am about to graduate in my senior year. Every time I was praised for my immature and beautiful voice, I just sneered, and what came to my mind was indeed those unbearable past events, so I lowered my voice more and more and didn't want to be discovered.

However, reality often jokes with each of us in a harmless way, and even if we don't want to laugh, we try to make it happen.

The small mosquito buzzed out a few words, probably unnoticed.

I once thought that people who had studied psychology could perceive the subtle tremors in the air between people, as if everyone who had studied psychology could be telepathically telepathized.

At this moment, I realized that it was just my thoughts, in fact, another thought in my body. Because if you don't want to say it, no one will know how your nervous system causes a physiological response.

"What's the matter......" made me even more speechless, my eyes confused, and I fell into deeper pain.

"I'll have a class here, a sand table simulation class. Wednesday is usually the student on duty here, and the teacher is on duty on Saturday and Sunday, are you in a hurry? You can make an appointment, which teacher you want to make an appointment, there is a teacher's duty schedule posted outside, you can take a look. ”

With that, the female teacher got up, took an information registration form, and asked me to fill it out. Name, gender, age, specialty, phone number, main experience·····

I nodded obediently, took the notebook, and took a closer look. This is a book with a cowhide roll, and I had one exactly the same one before, which was used to keep a diary, and it was not used up, and I don't know where it was lost. Immediately, my mind began to surge again, whether I had ever kept a diary or not. If I remember, why can't I write about what happened to me? If I didn't have a demerit, then why do I have such a thing as a diary in my memory?

My mind was piled up with such a jumble of questions, like many old bombs, and I don't know when it touched that nerve and exploded.

I picked up the pen, but what a hard thing it was for me!

A personal information sheet that is so ordinary is the same as an 800-meter run for me. The more I wrote, the heavier my hands became, the shorter my breathing became, and I broke out in a cold sweat, only to feel pain and stiffness.

What was the main experience, I was caught up in painful memories, at the age of fourteen, I stopped writing, and it seemed that I heard the girls crying in my backyard all the evening, and I never wanted to mention the pain again.

I subconsciously crossed it out with a pen, writing that I was nineteen years old, and suddenly I felt so cold, crossed my arms, unconsciously rubbed my arms, and my expression was stiff, which reminded me of something that made me very painful.

Who is to blame? Who is to blame, and how do I know? And at any time, I will only say that it is my fault that I blame myself badly.

In my fourth year of college, I finally had the courage to knock on the door of the counseling room. But this is the result, I did not expect.

In fact, I can't accept any result. However, to know how much courage it took me this time. Next time, I don't know if I'll be on the way back and forth again and again.

I thought, I'm going to fill it out and rush out. But the depressed heart, if you say one more word at this moment, your emotions will explode. His legs seemed to be filled with lead, and he couldn't get out of the door.

"You don't need to fill in any details, you can see how the previous classmates fill it in." The female teacher walked over and whispered.

I doubled it, and there was a classmate I knew very well, a boy in our class, and I remember that when I was a freshman, I once did several sets of psychological questionnaires and more than 100 questions. In the past, I was deeply aware of such problems, so I didn't find out. And he was the one who was discovered.

Once, when the three classes were in an open class together, the teacher on the podium called his name and talked about the meter, and then said that this is normal, don't laugh, there is nothing, the system has found you, and you have time to go to the consultation room. Then I looked back and he was standing at the end of the big classroom, leaning against the wall.

I started to regret it again, I should have come earlier, if I had the courage to enter the counseling room in my freshman year, I don't know how good it is now.

"What's wrong? Are you in a hurry? Otherwise, I'll find you a teacher now, can I get a male teacher? The female teacher may not be able to come this time, but the male teacher can? The attentive female teacher noticed my strangeness and asked with concern.

I nodded obediently, whimpering beyond words.

"You sit down here first, and I'll pour you a cup of hot water. I gave the male teacher a call, and he came over in a moment. He explained as he led me into another room.

I sobbed and walked in, a sense of familiarity coming over me. It's like meeting an old friend who has been longing for a long time, kind and warm.

The reason why it feels like this is probably because I once read "Bi Shumin's Essay Collection". There is an article about the layout of the consultation room, which creates a safe, equal, and warm atmosphere. Now I see it with my own eyes, simple and unpretentious, and the photo is frozen in my mind.

The beige pleated European-style curtains are ajar, and the wall air conditioner hangs above the corner. Half a meter by the window, two soft single sofas are placed at 90 degrees, and a vibrant wide-leaf hanging basket is placed on the long glass coffee table. Behind a soft chair is a silver-gray translucent bookcase, and a bucket of hanging baskets still sits on a square wooden table next to it.

I leaned back in the soft chair, closed my eyes, breathed deeply, and calmed down a lot. I rubbed my eyes with a tissue, drank some hot water, and began to look at the layout of the room.

There is a computer in the corner of the wall in front of the door, and there is a red-shelled court watch hanging on the wall, which is a bit strange, it has no stopwatch, and it is frozen at 8:50. There are dustpans, brooms, and garbage baskets next to the door. Although the sparrow is small, it has all kinds of organs. If you want to come to this consultation room, you will find it all in the room.

A steaming cup of tea, a pack of simple brand paper, a closed door, and a soft chair. Needless to say, if you can sleep here, you will feel refreshed. I leaned back in the soft chair and closed my eyes, quietly enjoying the good time of that moment.