On one occasion, General Rosazza led his troops on an expedition and reached the top of a mountain, below which was a vast valley with undulating hills on the opposite bank, and the enemy army was lurking in it. Caesar wanted to attack before the sun set, so he ordered his army to be deployed. The soldier in charge of the carrier pigeon said to him: "Report to the general, the 500 soldiers of the reserve are sixteen kilometers from here, and the trumpeter is sixteen kilometers to the south, and there is only one carrier pigeon left. ”

Caesar replied: "The key to victory in war is not in the number of men, but in morale." Let the carrier pigeon contact the trumpeter, as long as the trumpeter blows the trumpet, the morale will be boosted, and the soldier will move forward bravely. Go and call the trumpeters. ”

In general, the person who can inspire himself to take bold action will automatically obey, and just as the trumpet can inspire morale, your courage can inspire others to obey you. Heroism is a necessary condition for manipulating others.

Richard was a banker of considerable stature, and what his colleagues admired most about him was that he could satisfy everyone who came into contact with him (men respected him, women trusted him), and that there was no better place in the world to be a banker.

Was Richard inherently attractive enough to make everyone happy to approach him? Richard categorically denied this claim. He said: "I used to be timid and unresponsive, but after I discovered a secret decision; The whole person changed. ”

"This is the secret I call 'back thoughts'. It is to make yourself nervous in front of strangers completely suppressed in a matter of seconds. It's a method that I've done for myself, and it's really worked for me. ”

"About two or three years ago, the head of a $50 million company came to me about a loan to expand his business, and I was very nervous and didn't know how to deal with such a big boss. On the one hand, I wanted to please him and make a good impression on him, but on the other hand, I had to worry about the interests of the bank and his requirements, which was a mess. The problem was finally solved, and when I sent the big boss out the door, I found myself sweating profusely, as if I had fought a battle. I know it's because I'm too nervous and I'm afraid of this kind of broad character. So I made up my mind that I had to find a way to overcome this emotion, and I came up with this 'back thought'. ”

"The method is simple. The more people know each other, the less afraid they will be. As long as you look at a person from a realistic point of view, not with an imaginary eye, it is not difficult to find the person's shortcomings, and you will not have a sense of fear of him, which is the secret. If you feel some kind of pressure on you, you might as well think of him as someone or someone you have met who is worried about their children's schooling, or who is being pointed at and scolded by a fierce wife (or husband), or just a person in pajamas, sitting on the sofa, and watching TV with his legs crossed. In short, if you see the other person as an ordinary person with seven emotions and six desires, then your fear will naturally disappear, because since you are such an ordinary person, what is there to be afraid of? In this way, you will soon be able to be in harmony with him, face him calmly and fearlessly. ”

"According to my algorithm, it only takes three seconds to associate a terrifying person together, and it only takes three seconds to see him as an ordinary person, so it only takes six seconds before and after to shatter the majesty of the other party, and there is no longer a threat of fear."

This method is indeed a simple and effective method, and anyone can face others with confidence and self-confidence, as long as he uses this method and trains his mental qualities diligently. The philosopher Spinoza said, "The people who once scared me were ...... mere of my own mental health, but they were not very good." So, when you feel fears, you should keep confronting yourself with those fears, testing yourself, training yourself until you find out the cause of the fear. Now that the cause has been identified, the final step is to find a solution and break through the psychological barriers that generate fear.

A man who is timid by nature, who never dares to express his opinion in front of people, has been taught a way to train himself, which is to speak at least three times in any public meeting, as a habit of breaking through silence. However, in these three speeches, it is not necessary for him to stand up and face the crowd and say anything amazing, but to say whatever he wants, and to say it to his own ears. After a while, he had forgotten that he was being trained, and in a natural and natural manner he automatically said out loud what he had said to his ears. After that, he was able to communicate with others, exchange opinions and questions, and was no longer a member of the silent group.

Anyone who has ever studied driving or playing sports knows that the kindness of the instructor is often the key to success. Friendly teachers can create a sense of trust in students, so it is easier for them to improve their academic performance. The same principle can be applied to relationships. Be kind to anyone and do not make judgments that are prejudiced to others; Or expand the field of life and expose yourself to more people, these methods can help you eliminate the fear of people and generate confidence and vitality.

There was a businessman in Pennsylvania, USA, who often asked himself, "What am I going to do?" Because he is a candy merchant, his answer to himself is, "Let our candy be sold all over the world." ”

This goal ignited his will to confidence and vitality, in other words, gave him the courage and strength to overcome obstacles and move forward. "To make the confectionery produced by the company be sold all over the world", this is what he asked of the whole society, and other things - especially failures and setbacks - are not within his consideration, and this confidence and vitality eventually made him a world-famous billionaire.