Monday, March 23rd

I was a little late last night, and I wanted to sleep a little longer today, but my mother had to get up early to cook noodles for me.

In the afternoon, I watched a TV series and drew my classwork, and I didn't finish it until I had dinner. Originally, I thought that today was also a very ordinary day, but while eating, I noticed that my grandmother was sick and had a fever again...... I said, no wonder Grandpa Jiang came, she never came out. I didn't come out for lunch, and I didn't eat a bite of dinner.

It just so happened that my aunt and cousin also came, and by the way, they had a light meal and chatted a few words about homely things.

When my dad was about to drive my grandmother to the hospital, I went into her room to see her. She screamed non-stop, she wanted to vomit but she couldn't vomit when she had nothing to vomit, she was so uncomfortable that she wanted to beat her chest, but she didn't have the strength. However, the first thing she said to me was, "Zhenzhen, remember to help me put the chickens in the pigsty." When I got into the car, my mother who was close to me was too: "Wait for Har to help me put the chickens!" "Yes, I used to be hospitalized: "I want to go back, my chickens are still in the house." "Did you feed the chickens today?" “……”

Let me tell you, you can be misunderstood how much she likes chickens and ducks, and how much she loves breeding animals. NO！ For the cat, if she wants it to catch mice, she kindly wants to tie it up, and if she hates it, she will kick it away; For dogs, if you want it to take care of the home, she loves it to tie it firmly, hates it to yell, hates it to give birth, she just bagged it and threw it away; For chickens, ducks and geese, if she wants them to lay eggs and grow meat, she will take care of the food and people's pot cooking day and night, and hate that they are disobedient and restless, so they kick, beat, scold and ......

However, what she really wants to do is just to save a penny more and share a little more for her son. She dotes on her husband and offspring, and even her mother often can't stand it. Yes, her doting also includes me...... It was as if she never lived for herself......

Tuesday, March 24

Grandma's health has been really bad since a few years ago. Low platelets, few white blood cells, almost no coagulation function, and self-resistance is even more precarious. As long as there is a small opening on the body, it will bleed non-stop, and it is very easy to get infected, followed by fever, vomiting, weakness, lack of food, and unable to eat a mouthful of food.

That's how she is, she doesn't see anything to do on weekdays, she can eat and drink and do farm work, but she can't be idle anyway. After decades of hard work, she has long forgotten the comfort of resting, and she is uncomfortable not doing anything for a day. However, the years are not forgiving! Old, really old, even my granddaughter is about to talk about marriage, how can she not be old?

A few days ago, Grandpa caught a big mouse and asked Grandma to beat it to death with a brick. I wasn't there, but I also heard my grandfather's angry scolding: "You are so stupid!! "I don't know what happened, but grandma actually let it bite her hand, and the blood flowed for a long time.

Then I started having a fever the night before and was admitted to the hospital last night.

Every time my grandmother was sick and admitted to the hospital, the whole family was busy, and my mother often scolded my grandmother, "You can't rest for a while...... I want to ......". These days, probably no one has slept well except me......

Wednesday, March 25

There was no one at home today, but I woke up pretty early. I don't have to worry about what I want to do, or I have a live class in the morning.

However, the geese are all I think too much. Except for the fourth aunt who came to deliver herbs, there was basically nothing to do this morning. The chickens have been fed, and I don't have to do anything else, just feed myself and wash the pots and pans.

Thursday, March 26

When I woke up, today was the day of Yali Mountain...... A briefing, a composition, a chapter of a novel, and a morning English lesson......

However, this morning's dream was a bit scary. I dreamed of the class leader again, did I miss school? Or what's the drop?

What's even more confusing is that I dreamed that I was walking and chatting with him, and then he went to the toilet and forgot that I was walking in front, and I didn't go to him to theorize and simply go back to the dormitory by myself, but he was pulled from behind on the way back. I said, "Why can't I walk...... It turned out that he was pulling on my clothes. He noticed that I was gone, and then he saw me again and grabbed me, but neither of us said anything. I found the entrance anyway and went back to my dorm.

What do I mean by that? Have thoughts about him again? Don't don't ......

Saturday, March 28

Yesterday, I drew my hand-drawn homework in advance, and today is rare and leisurely.

When I was filling hot water today, I suddenly seemed to realize a truth: people who say that others hurt others may have hurt others themselves.

I had methodically filled the kettle with piping hot water. A trace of memory drifted into my mind - I threw water on my hand and threw it at a cat, saying that the cat was afraid of water, and it jumped away. As the screen turns, I still sprinkle water on a cat, but this time it's a wisp of hot water......

These two images remind me of my grandmother's attitude towards them, am I a bad human nature, is this? Or is it really genetic? I'm afraid I can't tell...... At least I can't see it clearly from the past ten years.

The ancients said, "Forty is not confused, fifty is known to know the destiny of heaven" I don't even have half of forty, how can I not have some doubts?

Recently, hand-drawing has made me see a lot of shortcomings, but board painting has allowed me to do more freely. There are fewer things, people live more easily, and even if it rains, the mood is not bad.

At present, the only thing that worries me may be that I don't know what TV series to put when I don't know how to draw a hand-drawn hand.

Oh yes. Grandma is still in the hospital, but the situation is already better, and the health is too bad when she is older, and she can only treat the symptoms but not the root cause when she enters the hospital. If you want everyone to be more relaxed, you can only tolerate it and restrain a little, this is a truly harmonious and stable home.

Although life is short, good time should not be wasted, but it is also necessary to have fun in time and combine work and rest!!

Good night and good dreams!