His face was dark, and he smiled without saying a word.

"Tell me, what's something I don't know?"

He knocked me on the head with his hand back.

"Anyway, there are a lot of things you don't know, so why not have one more?"

I glared at him, but he ignored the threat in my eyes.

In the blink of an eye, the streets are full of lights, everywhere is full of lights, the night of deep winter brings the end of the carnival, and the city is dressed up in a bewitching and splendid way. In the last few days, there has been a heavy snowfall, there are remnants of snow on the streets, cups and plates are hidden in the shade of a certain back in the city, some of them are piled up high, forming hard snow edges, and the waiters ambush those who are a little careless in the dark night.

The wind is cold and hard, spring is approaching, and they are all in the final madness. Cutting through people's lonely and hard figures like a sharp blade, each tree looks lonely and thin, standing silently in the wind, as if telling and silently longing.

A week before the Chinese New Year, the company sent New Year's goods to employees, and the purchased rice, flour, and oil were placed in the hall on the first floor. Zhang Ruolei and I stood in the deepest part of the hall, and I told him that when I used to go to work, I looked forward to the New Year's holiday, and I had money and things to send during the holidays, and some people had cars, but I didn't. At that time, I really wanted to break a penny in half and spend it, but then again, the months were stretched, but every day was full and full of energy.

"I didn't know you then."

He hugged his shoulders.

I smiled and looked at the smiling faces in front of me, busy and full of joy and satisfaction. Turned his head to face Zhang Ruolei.

"I used to think it was a joy to be giving. But standing here today, I feel happier than giving. ”

He hugged my shoulder, it was dark early in the northern winter, and the hall on the first floor was brightly lit, in stark contrast to the night that swept outside. Half is the end of winter, half is the beginning of spring. Half silent, half bright.

"A few days ago, I saw a person post a circle of friends, saying that a person's life is half and half. Half sea, half fire, half heaven, half hell. Half good, half bad. Half is about the same, and half is unbelievable. ”

He tilted his head to look at me.

"Where, the person who said this is too kind."

His tone suddenly became ethereal and distant.

"Nine times out of ten, life is not as good as it should be. Most people can't ask for it, and they don't cherish what they have in their hands. Humans are complex, changeable and greedy creatures. We are all destined to be tormented, physically and mentally exhausted, and will not be able to die well. ”

I looked back at him in amazement.

"Why do you talk so negatively?"

He tugged at the corners of his mouth and smiled miserably.

"Selling miserably with you, like who was not a literary young man. Ah, life! See what you've turned me into? ”

He shouted abruptly, spreading his arms to draw the staff back to the sideways.

"What are you doing?"

He put his arm around me.

"It's too tired at times, it's a way to entertain yourself. We're all in a state of flux. But in fact, a lot of the time it's self-inflicted. ”

I turned to face him.

"Little pot friend, if there is anything unhappy, tell my sister to listen, so that my sister will be happy."

He stretched out his hand, and the Five Fingers Mountain ruffled over my head, stirring my hair as disorganized as my mind at the moment.

The human snake stretched and bent, and the figures were full of people under the light, and the good three or five people whispered in a low voice, and occasionally raised their heads to see how long it would take their turn.

Chinese New Year's Eve can set off firecrackers in the north, but I always think that cities don't need these, and firecrackers don't have that atmosphere. Especially like me, year by year, those hearts are lighter and thinner, in the first few years there are people in the community to set off firecrackers, I am overwhelmed, one is lonely, and the lonely figure is only incompatible with the hustle and bustle of the festival outside; Second, it is inevitable to touch the scene. After Huaiping left, the closest people in the city were only me and my mother, but when it came to the New Year, I liked to hide. Find a strange place where no one knows, look at other people's lights, red and green, you cry, laugh, sad, cry, anger, remembrance, regret, all emotions can be loud, not afraid of being seen and seen.

But if it's at home, my mom and I are forced to laugh. The deliberately created atmosphere of joy is sometimes better than open and honest sadness and resentment, when she sees me laughing, I see her laughing more ugly than crying, and my heart is like a knife cone. In that case, it's really better to clean up your mood and leave space and buffer for each other.

This year's situation is different from previous years, and the Zhang family warmly invites us to celebrate the New Year together. One will soon become a family, and the other will be lively together. My mother doesn't like to go to other people's homes for the New Year on such days, but this time Zhang Ruolei mentioned it, she gladly agreed.

I persuaded her not to accommodate me too much, she is old, and there are still a few years to live? People don't have to look up to others to breathe at this age, and they don't need to look at people's faces for grievances.

My mom didn't think so, she said that this illness had taught her a lot. The last thing that people are worth is self-satisfied sadness and self-righteous self-esteem. Life is too short, how to be happy.

As before, she stripped one hand through my hairline, and her warm calloused palm brought back the warm memories of the past, and I looked up at her deeply, and she didn't pretend to cry or laugh on her face.

"I cannot live or die for you. Cry and laugh for you. No one in this world can replace anyone's joys, sorrows, and sorrows. She let out a long sigh, and the setting sun hit her side, and for a moment, I thought she was the most beautiful woman in the world.

"So, please live for yourself. Listen to your heart. Don't think too much about what you don't have. Because no one knows whether they will have it tomorrow or not. I saw you reading the Buddhist scriptures, what did the Buddha say? Human life is in a breath and a breath, a breath without two legs to kick the west sky, everything is fake, the happiness in front of the eyes is the truest. You look at the next 30 years, but those 30 years still need you to live the present first. ”

I choked up and nodded.

"Mom, you should start a class."

She smiled.

"Let my aunt invest in me."

Zhang Ruolei was busy answering on the side.

"Vote! Must vote. ”

On the day of the New Year, we passed early, and all the things of the Zhang family were well prepared, for fear that we would be cautious and overly unenthusiastic, and not to mention indifference. I secretly told Zhang Ruolei that I really felt at home.

Zhang Ruolei said that I said the wrong thing again, saying where are you? You are the Lord.

It's too early for me to say, we haven't proven it yet.

That year, the Chinese New Year was late, and a few days after the New Year was Valentine's Day, just in time for the marriage registration center to rest. Zhang Ruolei said that we will have a wedding first, and the marriage certificate will be made up later, he must pick a good day, but he is even more superstitious than me, saying that 214 did not catch up, 1214 did not catch up, so pick 315.

I thought about it for a long time, but I didn't expect that 315 had anything to do with our love or marriage. Did I say it's a good day? 315 is Consumer Rights Protection Day, and CCTV generally likes to hold a grand anti-counterfeiting party on that day. I criticized him for hinting to me that his feelings for me were not enough.

He retorted with crooked reasoning, saying that he had faith in his feelings for me that he chose that day.

He even pointed three fingers to the sky and swore to the sun, saying that in this life and this life, he Zhang Ruolei treats me, this situation can be seen in the sky, the sun and the moon can be watched, and all the exploitation and investigation can be suppressed.

I pulled down his hand and told him sadly that I used to think that two people were like glue and fell in love better than Jin. Who knew that in the future, the most reliable thing would always be gold, not people's hearts. Love is ferocious, castration is sometimes vigorous, and there is always the ability to catch the parties off guard.

I sincerely apologized to him, explaining that I knew that it was really not appropriate to say such a depressing thing in this situation.

Zhang Ruolei disagreed, saying that there was no taboo in his place, because all my worries were superfluous. All men in the world cheat, they can't resist the temptation, they are all stealing outside, and he won't split his legs.

I squinted at him, expressing deep suspicion of his confession.

He immediately changed into a smile on his face, and said as he ran.

"Because I did too much before I got married, I was already tired of aesthetics."

I chased out, and when I got to the hall, he and I had to pretend that it was okay, and I only dared to pinch me in secret, and I pinched me so secretly. But in fact, how can it be hidden from the old people in that hall.

Zhang Fusheng was in a good mood, and said that life is good, and there should be more people, and he also said that the Zhang family is not afraid of having more children, anyway, Zhang Ruolei has already taken foreign nationality and is not afraid of family planning.

This sentence gave me some pressure, I am not young, and it is unknown whether I will be able to have children in the future, let alone have more children. But he does have plans to have a child with Zhang Ruolei.

Zhang Ruolei did not reject it, he said that he wanted to have sex with you, as soon as he thought that the blood of you and me was fused and flowing in a child, he felt that the creation was wonderful, and he felt that there was an inextricable and eternal connection with you, so that he would not be afraid that you would leave me.

I said I wouldn't leave you.

He said you swear.

I don't understand why he insisted on making me swear.

Because you believe in Buddhism!

"What does believing in Buddhism have to do with vows?"

"Because don't

Swearing may be like a fart, but you know that if you don't swear, you will keep your oath once you say it. ”

I tilted my head and stared at him with wide eyes.

"I swear like a fart."

"I take your fart seriously."

I was amused by him. He was serious and insisted that I swear.

"Why do you still believe this?"

He didn't give up.

"Are you going to send it or not?"

"Hey, Zhang Ruolei."

I took a small mirror out of my bag and handed it to him.

"Look at yourself, how much you look like a resentful woman."

He snatched my little mirror and tossed it aside, but his eyes were aggressive.

"Swear not to leave me, no matter what."

"Control freaks."

I muttered quietly, but then compromised.

"Okay, I swear by Meizi that I will never leave Zhang Ruolei in this life and this life, and I will never leave him no matter what."

(End of chapter)