I want to get rid of Xiao Han, this idea keeps gnawing at my heart like a worm. One night I had a dream that I had stabbed her by hand. Her bright blood splattered out in a spurt, and the light in her eyes grew dimmer. A faint and hideous smile hung on the corner of his mouth. Die with a grievance or everlasting regret.

I stood up and stood on top of her, like a bloodthirsty beast, she was not dead enough, I leaned down, my nails grew like weeds, I sank my long nails deep into her flesh, I was willing to let her flesh fly for it.

She is not sorry, and it is not a pity to die a thousand times.

I was drenched in cold sweat, shouting and waking up from my dream, as if I was on a plateau with thin air, gulping and vomiting desperately, until Zhang Ruolei got up and hugged me tightly in his arms.

"What's wrong?"

"I dreamed of ......"

I gasped for air.

"I dreamed of ......"

I couldn't help but tremble, and the picture in my dream was bloody and shocking.

"I dreamed that I killed Xiao Han."

He stiffened, and his grip on me tightened.

I bit his lip on his shoulder.

"Zhang Ruolei."

"I'm here."

He said.

"Zhang Ruolei."

I called him again.

He rubbed my body as hard as he could, as if he wanted to rub me into his own.

"I'm here, I'm here."

He kept repeating mechanically.

"Xiao Han."

I had tears in my eyes, and I bet that in a second they would burst out of my eyes.

"Xiao Han has become a nightmare in my life."

I grabbed the corner of his coat with all my might.

"You say."

I hugged him tight.

"Say, how can I get rid of her completely?"

"Plums."

"Husband. I'm going to kill her, I'm going to kill her. ”

I got up from his arms and stared at the man in front of me with teary eyes. He was in pain. I know he's in pain. He can't protect his beloved, and that danger comes from him.

Zhang Ruolei turned on the bedside lamp, the dim and hazy light divided the night into delicate layers, everywhere was within reach of warm colors, I closed my eyes, the warm quilt covered my body, the whole world became stable and safe, I closed my eyes, Zhang Ruolei held my hand beside me.

"I don't sleep, I'll sleep when you're asleep."

I opened my eyes and wanted to tell him no, but I knew he wouldn't listen. So I closed my eyes again gently, but I couldn't sleep at all, and the image was repeated again and again, and my face was hideous, and my nails were wildly long, black, slender and sharp, like some kind of animal canine teeth.

I rolled over. Xiao Han's voice couldn't help but break in.

"No grievances in the past? The moment Huaihai climbed up my body, you and I were destined to be incompatible. ”

I opened my eyes and tried to even out my breathing. I unleashed my nature in my dreams, I couldn't do anything with her in real life, she kept pressing me and I knew it. I can't compete with her, let alone destroy her. I rolled over and fell asleep, and the seeds of hatred grew like my fingernails in my dreams, unbridled and willful

。

I don't hate her.

I said to myself.

I don't want her dead.

I frowned, because of the backlight, my wrinkled facial features were not easily discovered by Zhang Ruolei. They are shrouded in great shadows, and are there demons living there?

No, no, no.

My happy life is about to begin, no. I kept admonishing myself. I won't fall for her, I won't be a cruel, cold, and unconscious woman like her.

Absolutely not. I turned over again, and let myself be open and honest with Zhang Ruolei, and he could see the expression on my face stretching more and more in the dim and warm light.

Born from the heart.

I silently counted in my heart: one, two, three, four......

please！

Let me fall asleep!

I don't want to think about anything. Wake up tomorrow and everything will be back again. No big deal. I believe in God, I believe in cause and effect. If she hasn't retribution, it proves that she isn't necessarily as bad as I imagined. Sooner or later, she will be cleaned up.

I frowned.

Will the heavens clean her up? What if God could eradicate every bad guy? No, no, no, God is never fair. The law of the jungle, natural selection, there is no way out for everyone, you are either ruthless, cruel, or you can only swallow your anger. Only the weak will place their hopes on God and retribution. We like to use this sentence to convince ourselves when we are too weak to make ourselves feel better, but only God knows, it simply does not have time to administer justice.

All of us are his puppets, all his dolls, all his props, he makes us love and hate, we make us fight, we are like slaves in the ancient Roman arena, we kill each other like animals. Only then would he feel pleasure and make himself sigh 'O stupid humans!' ’

I buried my head deep in the crook of Zhang Ruolei's arm, I don't like this world.

The last time there was a puja in a temple in the city, I was in the middle of it. An old Dharma master was preaching the Fa, and he said, "Ten thousand laws are idealistic, one thought of good arises, and one thought of evil arises." It is these endless, endless, and endless thoughts of good, good, and evil that make us endure endless pain and suffering.

He also said that let's give birth to endless renunciation. What is renunciation? I just want to leave the five turbid evil worlds in front of me, and don't covet all the illusions in the world. All longevity and poverty, all beautiful skins, all love, hatred, hatred and family wealth that life does not bring about death and cannot take away. If we can give up, we come thinking that we are blessed, but who has really enjoyed it? We have come to suffer, only the stupid will be in the middle and enjoy it, and the truly wise and wise people will want to leave as soon as possible, and never come back.

"I really don't want to come back. If there is an afterlife, I don't want to have another future life. I don't want to have any afterlife. Life is hard, and I have never tasted any happiness. No, those joys are too ethereal, trivial and like soap bubbles, colorful and bizarre in the sunlight, but as long as you touch it, it will be shattered. ”

Life is a big dream. We are all obsessed with this poor, pathetic, and terrible dream.

I raised my eyes and saw Zhang Ruolei's eyes staring directly at the opposite wall, with a terrifying and fierce light.

"Wakalei."

I whispered to him.

He woke up like from a dream.

"Huh?"

He said, turning his head and tugging at the corners of his mouth to make himself smile far-fetched, then reached out and gently rubbed my hair.

"What's wrong? Still can't sleep? ”

He put his arm around me and pressed my face against his chest.

"I can't do anything else, I'm afraid of being heard. You know, now we're not as free-spirited and passionate as we used to be. ”

I knew what he was covering.

"The look in your eyes was so scary. What are you thinking? ”

In fact, we all know the answer without asking.

"Husband, promise me."

"Huh?"

His hand was still on my hair.

"Don't go toe-to-toe with her."

He looked at me puzzledly, "Why did you suddenly remember to say this?" ”

I groaned slightly.

"It's not all of a sudden. In short, she can be willing to cut her body, but we can't. We still have to live, and we can't compare with her. ”

I looked up and looked at him earnestly.

"Anyway, you promise me. Don't mess with her. I thought, we can ......."

But what can be? What can we do about it? I really don't know, I can't talk anymore for a while.

"Don't think about it so much. I don't believe she's flawed. This woman has wrapped herself too tightly, but it is impossible for a person to be without a life. You can rest assured. ”

"Fate?"

We speak in unison.

"But what is her weakness?"

I thought of her son, and almost instantly I slapped myself in the face. Why did I become as unruly and vile as she was? The child is innocent, and he seems to be as big as Huaiping, but in fact, it is in vain, we all know that Xiao Han has a small son, but no one knows the true face of the child's Lushan, let alone where he is at this moment.

"Forget it."

This is the third time I've said this. Only people who are at a loss for what to do with the problem will often put the word on the table.

"Let's go to sleep first, and we'll talk about it tomorrow."

The next day, it was business as usual. Mrs. Su came to visit again, she went directly to Zhang Ruolei's office this time, the two of them conspired in it for a long time, Zhang Ruolei contacted an international surrogacy agency, it is said that there are celebrities and rich people who have patronized, it is very safe, and the two parties do not meet throughout the whole process, all by the agency.

I think he's not even going to be able to do it in a way that violates the laws of nature, and maybe he's playing a bit of a legal game.

But he looked full of ambition and determined to win, I was very puzzled, I felt that the two of them were still discussing how to deal with Xiao Han the night before, and why he shifted his focus in an instant.

So when I went home from work at night, I asked him if he wanted to use Mrs. Su to fight Xiao Han, because Xiao Han had the idea of beating Su Yuntian, as long as

Su Yuntian's family business has a successor, so Xiao Han's wishful thinking is unlikely to be successful.

I also heard that Mrs. Su is now very protective of Su Yuntian, and this old woman even quietly and secretly contacted the other shareholders of the Su family. Zhang Ruolei guessed that the old lady wanted to keep a back hand, if there was one in ten thousand, she would definitely do everything she could to get Su Yuntian's bare ass out. Just ask an old man who has nothing, if Xiao Han is rambling, will there still be women interested in him?

Zhang Ruolei said that he had reached an agreement with the old lady in private, once the Su family's situation changed abruptly, Zhang Ruolei would definitely stand on the old lady's side, and the two people would join forces to control the board of directors, and then ......

Of course, this must be a choice. Zhang Ruolei said that to keep the Su family is to keep the Zhang family.

"What does the two have to do with each other?"

I was puzzled.

"Fool."

He tapped me on the forehead.

"Su's shares, Mrs. Su's age, and she has no children, if she turns her face with Su Yuntian again, she will do whatever it takes to win at that time, and we will have the opportunity to negotiate terms with Mrs. Su."

I still don't get it.

"What does that have to do with Xiao Han?"

(End of chapter)