For me now, the road ahead is still full of difficulties.

And I'm still very worried about Luo Qinfen's state, and I don't know how she is lately, and I haven't been able to hear from her, which makes me feel anxious.

I never thought that time could pass so quickly, and it was the season of a year when the flowers on the peak mountain were in full bloom, and as soon as March passed, April came in a hurry with the tail of March, and the weather gradually warmed up, I thought that I would never see the April day of the palace again, but I did not expect that one day I would come back again.

Sometimes, the smell of flowers wafted into the house, and I opened the window, and there were guards standing outside the window, and I couldn't see the flowers in the distance clearly, so I looked at them for a while, stared at them, and finally, I decided to give up.

I think there are a few times in my life, before I go to bed at night, I will repeatedly ask myself why I have come to this point.

It's clear that this is not the life trajectory I want, but it's just so wrong.

The most important point is that this kind of mistake can never be remedied.

In the past few months, I have learned one thing, and that is to enjoy solitude, to feel the never-ending long night, to grasp a straw of hope in the midst of difficulties, and to give myself the courage to keep persevere.

No matter how sad you feel, how painful you feel, how much you feel.

Give yourself a reason to wake up the next day.

I had to be alone almost all day long, that endless loneliness, no matter how I could get rid of it, I finished reading all the books, and no one brought me new books, so I could only read them a few more times, and occasionally write and write articles, although it was really not good, but it could also be used to pass the time when I was bored.

The guqin in my room has accumulated dust, I have tried a few times, maybe I played too much Jingyu qin, I am really not used to playing this, the strings are also very hard, the sound is not accurate, I tried to tune the tone, are not very good, there are always a few out of tune, and finally I gave up.

Xia Zicheng didn't come for a while, and then I found out when I secretly leaned on the door and eavesdropped on the conversation of the guards at the door.

Now Luo Qinfen is already a concubine and the only concubine in the harem.

Originally, after my death, Xia Zicheng didn't have any intention of re-establishing the post, and everyone was worried for a while.

Even the date of the showgirl election has been moved forward.

The guards are all saying that what kind of ecstasy soup this woman of the Luo family gave to the emperor is not the Luo family's marriage.

I thought, I didn't do anything.

They also said that now Luo Qinfen is a concubine in the palace, what will I do with it?

A dead queen.

It is estimated that he will have to be locked up here forever.

They can see it, and I naturally know that I have four or five months to give birth, and although I have always been very concerned about Luo Qinfen, there is really nothing I can do.

I have felt this powerlessness more than once.

It's just that I can only do it in a hurry, I can't do anything, watching Luo Qin fall into this palace city step by step, I don't even have a chance to reach out and pull her.

But how would I know.

This incident is a great thing for Luo Qinfen.

She lives a different life from me, in the harem, enjoying all the glory and wealth.

Also, in this world, I should be the only one who can be stupid like me.

It's not appropriate to let a good queen go, you have to fake your death and escape, it's good to be a dead person for the rest of your life, and you were caught back, which is even more stupid.

I said to myself, "Luo Qinlin, Luo Qinlin, when will you be smarter." ”

Such an obvious trap, I actually really stepped into it, and now that I think about it, how could Luofu be so quiet before it was time to sleep, and along the way, I didn't see a single maid, and the room was even more quiet and terrifying.

If I could have noticed it immediately, I wouldn't have exposed myself, but it's useless to figure it out now, because it's too late.

I was still holding the book in a daze, and there was a "creaking" sound at the door.

A girl dressed as a palace maid walked in, and as soon as she entered, the guard at the door closed the door.

I put down the book and looked at her.

The person is very faced, and it seems that he may be a new palace maid, so I don't know him.

She knelt down before me and gave me the etiquette of meeting the Empress.

Actually, it doesn't have to be like this, I'm not a queen now, so I said, "I don't have to do this big gift in the future, get up." ”

"Yes." She bowed her head and said, "The slave Xiaohuan has seen the queen's mother. ”

"I'm not a queen anymore, let's call Miss Luo, it sounds more comfortable."

She replied, "Yes." ”

Seeing that she was quite obedient, no other palace maid had come to me for such a long time, and I was very curious about her arrival, so I asked, "What are you here for?"

She lifted her hand, and that's when I saw that she was holding a small and delicate box that looked like a food box, and I looked at her suspiciously.

She bowed her head and said respectfully: "This is the food that Concubine Qin sent to you, it is all made by Niangniang herself, I hope the emperor ...... Miss Luo can like it. ”

"Qinfen?" I stood up, held my stomach, and hurried forward to check, I took the food box and placed it on the table.

When I opened it, it was indeed some sweets in Lancheng, I picked it up and tasted one, it was a familiar taste, it was at this moment, I suddenly felt a little sad, I have been here for so long and had all kinds of emotions, but I have never been so sad as now.

It feels like the years have passed for a long, long time, and the last time I remember Qin Fan is still stuck at the moment when she ran out of the door.

My nose was sore, and I turned to her and said, "Help me thank Concubine Qin." ”

"The slave will." She replied, "Is there anything else Miss Luo would like to say to Concubine Qin?" Slaves and maids can convey on their behalf. ”

What else do you want to say to Ločen?

I thought about it for a moment and asked, "How is she doing?" Are you happy in the palace? ”

Xiaohuan replied: "Niangniang is living very well in the palace, and the emperor also spoils her, she is very happy." ”

"Really?" I answered, and then was silent for a long time before I said, "That's good, I don't have anything more to say, I hope she'll always be happy." ”

Xiaohuan saluted me, and finally responded to me: "Yes, the slave and maid know, and the slave and maid will retire first." ”

"Go ahead." I waved at her, and she turned away.

I watched her leave, and the guards closed the open door again.

At that moment, I suddenly realized that I was wrong, very wrong.

Luo Qinfen is right, from before to now, I don't know what she really wants, so I will only blindly use my cognition to make judgments, maybe this palace that I am most unwilling to enter is what she dreams of?

So all along, it's the problem that has arisen in me, I'm the eldest daughter, and I'm used to trying to trap her in my cognition.

Luo Qinfen, in the future, I will not try my best to get you out of the palace.

Stay here for as long as you want.

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