One

The crow is a domestic pet crow, and when the first love is lost, he cries with the owner, who is drinking at that time.

The host poured him three glasses of wine, saying that these three glasses were nostalgic wine, and that after drinking it you would be able to forget about your troubles.

The crow drank the first glass of wine, and said that once he and his girlfriend, flying over tall buildings, flying over low trees, everywhere were two together, inseparable, husband and wife, never thought that one day, would fall into such a situation.

The host does not speak.

The crow drank the second glass of wine, and said that she had seen her after the breakup, and her new boyfriend was taller, larger than the ordinary crow, and his wings were as hard as the stones on the top of the mountain, and he was very handsome, and he really couldn't compare.

The crow drank the third glass of wine, collapsed on the table, confused, and repeated in his mouth, isn't it just a girlfriend, where can I not find it.

The crow fell asleep.

After waking up again, I looked around blankly, rushed out of the window with fighting spirit, and returned home with my new girlfriend in less than half a day.

The owner was still drinking.

The crow smiled on his face, pointed his wings, proudly, and asked his master: Is it beautiful?

The master nodded, but without expression, only poured a glass of wine for the crow and pushed it over.

After the crow finished drinking, his smile slowly disappeared, and his tears smashed on the table, and he cried for half a night.

It's too similar, every smile is a shadow of the past.

The new girlfriend was stunned, and the owner told her, let's go, you are too similar to his ex-girlfriend, and he still has a burden in his heart that he can't put down.

The crow sobered up and ran away from home and disappeared.

When the owner met the crow again, the crow was still a single crow, with a scruffy beard and blank eyes, and it became more and more similar to the master.

The crow said, I found that fate is a circle, and we run in it, forever, but we can't run out.

The master asked him, where have you been.

The crow said, "I have flown over a distant mountain, and over a river, and over a few fields, and I have seen this world, and I have seen all kinds of things in this world."

The host nodded, that was good.

The crow said again, but I could not get rid of her shadow, and wherever I went, I knew any female crow, it was her appearance. I've had many girlfriends, but every day when I wake up, I think she's there for me.

Sometimes I wonder if people are like this, after seeing a woman, all the women in the world become her.

The master was speechless, and only poured three glasses of wine on the table and pushed them to the crow.

The raven understood, and he drank the first glass of wine, and said, "I have flown so fast, over a long distance, over the highest peaks, but I cannot fly over the memories that she has left in my heart."

The host still does not speak.

The crow drank the second glass of wine, smashed the glass and scolded, why, fucking why, what the hell!

The owner, says the reason......

The crow had already drunk his third glass of wine, slumped on the table, and slowly fell asleep.

The owner put away the wine glass and sighed: "Silly boy, the crows in the world are as black as they are, and they don't look like ghosts." ”

Wenyuan.com

Two

One board, two rats.

Black Mouse: Broken, broken, broken.

White Mouse: To si, to si, to si, to si.

Black Mouse: Escaped the mousetrap, escaped Tom Cat, and never escaped the sticky mouseboard.

White rats: Avoid the biological students, avoid the scalpel, and not avoid the sticky rat board.

Black Mouse: Brother organ raised, eat public food?

White Mouse: That's good.

Black Rat: Phew, scum who has succumbed to humanity.

Black Mouse: Don't struggle, this is a sticky mouse board, polyisobutylene glue, adding resin to increase the adhesion, and also increasing the smell of peanuts, a veteran like me can't escape.

Mouse: You know a lot.

The black rat wanted to turn around and show off, but his fur hurt from the sticky rat board, so he gave up this plan.

Black Mouse: My mother gave birth to eight children, ten brothers each, and I was the last of the last child. The eldest brother died of a cat, the second brother died of a dog, the third brother died of a rat trap, the fourth brother died of a rat trap, the fifth brother s s i was strong in poisonous rats, the sixth brother was arrested by the rat man to make up for it, the seventh brother si was glued to the rat glue, the eighth brother si was killed by the mouse attractant, and the ninth brother was driven away by the mouse repellent.

White rats: There are so many rat traps for human beings, and the house rats are not extinct, which is really capable.

Black Mouse: It's all about us... (Looking down at the watch), twenty-one days have passed, and my daughter-in-law should give me ten babies.

White Mouse: Speaking of which, you came out to find a stutter for your wife and children?

Black Mouse: No, it's all forced by people. A mouse can eat 9Kg of grain in a year, and ten babies can eat the weight of an adult man in a year.

Mouse: Good appetite.

Black rat: A female rat can live for three years, give birth to 80 a year, and one acre of land can produce 1,000 catties of wheat.

Mouse: That's true.

Black Mouse: It's a small matter to kill you, but I'm afraid that the person with a perverted penchant will trap you in the wall of the wooden mechanism, and open four doors, each door has a wooden man, and as soon as you open the door and touch the mechanism, the wooden man will hammer you and starve you alive.

White Mouse: People during the Daxing period of Emperor Jin and Yuan, in the era of no mobile phones, people were idle.

Black Mouse: I know this, it seems to be a rat who has read books.

White Mouse: Scientific research institutions, just ears and eyes.

Black Mouse: Since you eat public food and have two days off every week, why do you run?

Mouse: Do you know why the guinea pig can eat public food?

Black Mouse: Is it because you are more fertile, you can have 10 litters a year, 15 per litter?

Mouse: Definitely.

Black Rat: Is it because you have a docile personality and eat less?

Mouse: Not really.

Black Rat: Why is that?

Mouse: Because we are 90% genetically similar to humans, some of the coding regions can even be 99% similar. Because we can live and nourish, we are docile and timid, so we make the best biological objects. If there is an anti-cancer drug that needs to be tested, it will induce us to become cancerous first; If there is a viral disease, take us for a pathology test. What's even more terrifying is that they raised us as feed, and when we were older, we were fed to the cherished snake python.

Black Mouse: I can't imagine that this is not a cheap bowl of tea and rice.

Mouse: Do you know why humans hate you?

Black Mouse: I'd like to hear what you have to say.

White rats: digging people's houses, it is said to be unkind; Stealing food from others is called unrighteousness; gnawing on wires and destroying public utensils is called disloyalty; What's even more terrible and hateful is that the plague, hemorrhagic fever, typhoid fever and other diseases are all contagious by you, a black disease, ruined the whole of Europe, how do you say that mankind does not hate you.

Black Mouse: Weird, weird.

Mouse: What else do you deny?

Black Rat: In your opinion, you White Rat has a personal relationship with people?

White Mouse: That's good.

Black Mouse: When someone came and abandoned me in the ditch, will they take you and release you?

Silence.

Black rat: Ten zhang of wood, which can be inhabited by dozens or hundreds of birds and birds, and countless snakes, rats, mole ants hide, but humans use it as a beam, but it only inhabits a family of three; The old ox ploughs the land, toils day and night, dies of old age, and sells the corpse as beef, how can there be loess to hide? Not to mention how many animals ran away from a railroad, and a power plant hid in the sky, scattering countless birds. The righteousness you mentioned, but what human beings treat us?

Black rats: In the final analysis, if it can be used, it will be a beneficial insect, and if it is harmful, it will be a bandit. Kind, those who are not of my race will have different hearts, why do you bother to shake your lips before us and other free people?

Black Mouse: Why don't you speak? SI up?

Mouse: No.

Black Mouse: It's almost dawn, and you haven't told me how you got here.

White Mouse: How old are you?

Black Mouse: Seven days of crawling, 12 days of opening of the eyes, now it's three months.

Mouse: I'm three months too.

White mouse: I have 14 brothers and sisters in one litter, because the female rats are limited, I have to leave only six in addition to eight. We eat nutrition bars made with egg white bone meal, drink high-pressure acidified water, and are pampered, and now we have no trace of resistance. Just wait until today, exactly three months, to do the experimental group and the control group.

Black rats: What is the experimental group and what is the control group?

White mice: They are all induced to become cancerous, the experimental group is fine, there is a drug to try, and the control group is purely waiting for s i.

Black Mouse: Are you in the control group or the experimental group?

The rat rolled over, and in the hazy light, the sparse fur easily fell off its body.

White mice: Naturally the control group.

White Mouse: You have been starving all your life, but you are happy to be free; I was well fed and clothed, but I was imprisoned for the rest of my life. Since ancient times, freedom has a price, and it depends on how big your chips are to be able to impress the heavens. The moment I was caught injected, I bit the student's hand and took the opportunity to escape here.

It was the farthest place I had ever traveled in my life, and for the first time I had smelled the grass being crumbled and the soft feet when I stepped on the dirt. The diurnal change is a long process, not the icy halo of electric light. The wind blows the fur cold, and the dew wets the fur and makes it cold, which has never been felt before. Chaowen said, Xi and S i, this is the happiest thing.

The white rat gnawed on the fur made of black rats and glue, and the sound of thin rats continued, and the black rats measured their bodies, and saw one after another black rats on the ridge of the house, and the old fat one shouted, Dad, we are here to save you.

The white rat has just finished nibbling on his hair, go ahead, you're free.

The sky was bright, the black rat in the hole looked at the sticky mouse board, the hostess screamed, got into the arms of the man, the man looked at the white sh i body on the sticky mouse board, and was surprised, I didn't think that there were albino house mice, strange and strange, take pictures and send them to the circle of friends.

The mother rat snuggles up, what is that?

The black rat watched as the man threw the sticky rat board into the trash.

That's an idealist who is willing to pay for freedom.

Source: Alpha Egg / Zhihu

Apologies for the invasion and deletion

?? Three

1、

One day, a fearless bunny knocked on the doorbell of the Demon King's Castle.

"Demon King, I'm going to defeat you!" The little rabbit holds her little carrot like a stalk. The sword pointed directly at the gate of the Demon King's Castle, which was thirty times taller than her.

"fine~fine, which child's child is full and has nothing to do." The Demon King opened the door impatiently.

It's just that looking around, the demon king didn't find the source of the sound. While he was hesitating, he suddenly felt a pain in his instep.

"Whew!" The Demon King jumped straight with his feet in his hands.

Seeing this, the little rabbit looked at the carrot in his hand curiously: "Is the demon king so weak?" ”

The demon king grabbed the carrot in the rabbit's hand: "Don't talk about carrots, it will hurt if you are poked by lettuce, okay!" After saying that, the demon king chewed a large mouthful of carrots, "It's really unpalatable, phew." ”

"Door-to-door harassment incident resolved." The demon king Shi Shiran was about to turn around and leave, but suddenly saw that something was not quite right with the little rabbit at her feet - she kept her head down.

"What's wrong with you?"

"That's... That was the last carrot on my journey! The little rabbit raised his head, his eyes full of tears, "I'll fight with you!! "One bite at the Demon King's calf.

"Hurt !!!"

2、

"You ate my last carrot!" The bunny was tied to a bench at the end of a dining table.

"That's why you bite??" The Demon King tied a strap to his calf.

"You even say it's not tasty!"

"I also said that onions, ginger and garlic are not delicious!!"

"Hmm!" the little rabbit's eyes turned red again.

"Nonono, auntie, don't cry, I'll go prepare a carrot dinner for you, okay!"

3、

Steamed carrots, braised carrots, carrot dipping sauce...

In the castle, a carrot feast fills a ten-meter-long dining table.

"I don't eat bad people's food!" Although the saliva had dripped to the floor, the little rabbit still had a determined face, except for the eyes.

"Who told you I was a bad person?" The Demon King, who was not interested in carrots in the slightest, cut his nails.

"Are you a good person?"

Blowing his nails: "I'm not a good person, poof~"

"It's definitely you're scared. Scare the villagers down the hill and let them give it to you. ”

"I gave half of my fresh xue to the alchemist in exchange for a cart of turnips! Can you little thing have even a little conscience? "The Demon King is furious.

"The world says that the brave man will never see him again when he enters the Demon King Castle."

"That's right, come into my house and smash it. Robbed, I sent the knight chief to be imprisoned, but I can't find it. ”

"Last year your pet demon. Dragon Burn. Ruined Taoyuan Village! ”

"Perfect, a dragon I can't beat can be my pet."

"Every full moon night, you go to the village to scare the children!"

"Dream next time. Nightmare invade the village, you go to protect the villagers? ”

"You draw the land as king, and no one is allowed to go near the castle."

"Did you know the last time I spent a week cleaning the graffiti off the wall?"

The little rabbit was choked and couldn't speak, and when the demon king saw this, he had to lower his voice and say in a good voice: "Good, the carrots are cold." ”

4、

The little rabbit lived in the castle, although there was still friction with the demon king.

Half a month later, late one night, the little rabbit heard a small sound.

She crept her feet into the kitchen.

The Demon King was crouching in front of the stove, munching on something. The cold moonlight stretched his shadow long, like a strange bat.

At this time, the little rabbit accidentally made a little noise. "Who!" The Demon King turned his head alertly, his eyes glowing red, and his mouth was full of fresh snow.

"Oh my God, he's eating people. Meat! The rabbit screamed and escaped from the castle.

5、

"Hey, can you listen to me properly." The little rabbit ran wild in the field, and the demon king flew tightly beside her.

"You're a! I'm going to report to the Chief Knight. ”

"Do you have proof?"

"I saw it with my own eyes!"

"That's a tomato!"

"A big devil, in the middle of the night, eating tomatoes in the kitchen? Do you think I'm a stupid bunny? ”

"A silly rabbit, carrots every day, I haven't eaten anything else in half a month? Do you think I'm a stupid bunny? ”

Hearing the Demon King's explanation, the rabbit hesitated a little: "I... Why should I believe you? ”

"Why don't you try it?" As he spoke, the Demon King leaned his face to the rabbit's side.

The little rabbit hesitated and licked it, and sure enough, it was sweet and sour.

6、

With a soft "snap", the demon king in mid-air suddenly turned into a rabbit and fell on the grass.

The little rabbit looked at the demon king rabbit in front of him and asked curiously, "Why did you suddenly become a rabbit?" ”

The Demon King Rabbit looked at the little rabbit affectionately: "Actually, I used to be the prince of the Rabbit Country, and the Eagle Witch cast a spell to turn me into the Demon King, and I can't tell anyone about it, only the kiss of a true lover can restore me." ”

The little rabbit was stunned: "So? ”

"Thank you, my love." The Demon King Rabbit directly pounced on the little rabbit.

"Where are you touching? It's an open space! Oh~"

7、

After completing the great harmony of life, the demon king rabbit was lying on the grass contentedly, and there was a little rabbit lying next to him, blushing.

When the little rabbit woke up, he was already in the castle, and the demon king sat on the edge of the bed in frustration.

"Honey, what's wrong with you?" The little rabbit didn't notice that the demon king was no longer what a rabbit looked like.

The Demon King covered his face with both hands and sobbed: "The spell has not been lifted, oh my God! ”

The little rabbit hurriedly comforted the tall demon king: "Don't worry, dear. ”

"Can you kiss me again with love?"

"Absolutely."

With a "snap", the demon king turned into a black demon king rabbit again. He threw the bunny down on the bed in surprise: "Thank you, dear!" ”

Sunrise.

Sunset.

Seeing the little rabbit in his arms fall asleep, the demon king rabbit gently pulled out his arm - today is the day to protect the village.

Quietly closing the door, the demon king stretched: "Sure enough, the human form is comfortable, and the rabbit form is so uncomfortable." The Transfiguration of the Ancestral Religion was not learned in vain. ”

After saying that, the demon king turned into his best bat and flew to the village below the mountain.

Inside the house, the little rabbit is dreaming.

cr. difficult to give/zhihu