At noon, I took the note home.

The lunch break was leisurely and quiet, and I opened it with trepidation:

"Even though I'm a high school student, I still look at this kind of thing like a child, and I see it as friendship. If you treat it with a more mature psychology, it is really too annoying and trivial. I hope you can also treat it with a childlike heart, just like Song Hongyi. ”

Just like the dawn in the dark night, just like the sun out of the haze, "childlike heart" is just an inconspicuous five words, but at this moment it bloomed the most dazzling light, touching my long-dormant heart.

In the past ten years, I have experienced this "annoying" and "trivial" life.

Loving someone, missing, fantasizing, suspicious, ashamed, afraid, trying in every possible way to get closer, but again and again in the inexplicable bondage defeated, as a result, on the road of pursuit farther and farther.

When everything has irretrievably ended, I suddenly look back, like a dream, and wake up from the dream, only to find that the road I have traveled is a mess, full of "annoying" and "trivial".

It destroys all the good and leaves behind infinite resentment.

In this process, a heart as pure as a child has been lost on the road at some point.

I remember having such a childlike heart.

At that time, Shen Yun and I picked dog tail grass together, played with building blocks, fought hens raised in the backyard, watched colorful TV programs together, and sat under the towering pine trees together and looked up at the sky. But Shen Yun is not the girl I like.

At that time, I flirted with the girls in the dance troupe, instructed each other in dancing, laughed at each other's makeup, and called each other my wife and husband affectionately. These girls are so beautiful, they are all girls I like.

At that time, I dared to step in between Xie Liang and Yan Jinfeng, and when I was at the same table with Yan Jinfeng, I could make her happy as I wanted, accompany her to complete her homework, and draw a cat for her. She's the girl I'm most excited about.

And when I first started liking Lin Ximeng, it seemed that I didn't dare to approach her easily. On the day I graduated from junior high school, the first words I accosted her after school didn't know how much courage I had.

That childlike heart is long gone. But when did I lose that childlike heart?

That day, I was called a parent by the teacher, buttoned up the hat of early love, and cried all day, when the tears dried, my heart became no longer pure. In my mind, there should be no contact between people of the opposite sex.

That day, I was heartbroken by Yan Jinfeng, and forcibly kissed Shen Yun when I lost my mind, and when the anger subsided, my heart began to hide. In my mind, there is a heaviness between the opposite sex.

Perhaps, before meeting Lin Ximeng, that childlike heart was gone.

And now, these five words reappeared, like a bolt of lightning, splitting the stones that had accumulated in my heart for many years, and destroying the seal that bound my heart.

I finally saw the beating and youthful "childlike heart" again, a heart that had no barriers, no suspicions, no sorrows, no worries, and freedom - the heart I once had.

This heart can make us all as innocent as children and see each other as ordinary friends.

Can I realize I like her? I realized, but my childlike heart led me to see her as one of my friends, without gender or identity differences.

Will she be aware of my affection for her? Even if she didn't, she would be moved by my authenticity and would be willing to talk to me intimately and without any worries; When she realizes it, she will interact with me like a child playing.

In the relationship, the two should be children who will never grow up, let the innocent emotions exude an elegant fragrance, let each other wander among the thousands of flowers, and soar between the blue sea and blue sky.

There is no love here, only friendship, and in friendship there are no barriers, only mutual connection.

The purpose of loving someone is only to be with that person forever, if you can't do it from the perspective of love, but can get it from the perspective of friendship, then why not abandon the so-called love first and build friendship?

Thinking of this, I finally understood why I broke with Yan Jinfeng in the first place. Originally, the time when friendship existed was beautiful, but once she began to face her from the perspective of "love", all kinds of "annoying" and "trivial" followed, and people were overwhelmed.

In the end, Yan Jinfeng couldn't bear it anymore, and resolutely chose to escape from this life, and then she chose to throw herself into the arms of others. Cycle after week, she threw herself into the arms of one boy after another.

But isn't that the one who started it? Isn't she what she is now coquettish? I made her like this, and then I abandoned her because I hated her, and in the end the truly unrighteous person turned out to be myself!

It turns out that I have lost my "childlike heart", and I have been trapped in the prison set by myself all along! Now, in the face of Lin Ximeng, although he has gained much more happiness than when he got along with Yan Jinfeng, he still can't get rid of the entanglement of "annoying" and "trivial", the deeper he loves, the more restrained he is, and the more he wants to get closer, he will only be more estranged.

Haha, at this same critical juncture, unexpectedly, I was saved by Lin Ximeng. I'm glad I chose Lin Ximeng, this time I really read it right, Lin Ximeng's soul is really the most beautiful.

I am willing to accept Lin Ximeng's suggestion to stop "loving" her, I will see her as an ordinary friend, just a very important friend. In the future, when we meet, we will greet each other with a smile like a normal friend, and when we talk, we will communicate calmly, no longer deliberately, no longer pretentious, everything will become natural, tranquil, and casual.

I am willing to maintain a long-term friendship with Lin Ximeng like this, so why should I care what will happen in the future. Even if I can't be a close lover in the future, that's still my best friend, and I won't complain about anything. Even if I lose contact in the future, I will not regret it, it is enough to have a confidant in life, Lin Ximeng is such a confidant, the most important person in my growth, I will always remember her good.

Maybe in my upbringing, there will be two breakups, one sour, leaving infinite hatred, and the other sweet, leaving infinite admiration.

Relieved, I smiled and read what Lin Ximeng had said again before putting the note in my treasure drawer. It doesn't matter if you don't look at it, but if you look at it again, you will find a clue: "...... Just like Song Hongyi. ”

What does it mean to be "just like Song Hongyi"? Could it be that in her mind, I am not as good as Song Hongyi? Song Hongyi can bring her happiness, but I can only bring her "annoying" and "trivial"? Okay, you Song Hongyi, Song Hongyi, you actually have Lin Ximeng's heart more than me!

Actually, I know who Song Hongyi likes now, it is a girl who lives in the same community as me, and I also know that Song Hongyi is a person, as long as it is the girl he likes, his persistence and firmness are not weaker than mine. What's more, Song Hongyi is a person who attaches great importance to brotherhood, if he treats me as a big brother, he will treat Lin Ximeng as a sister-in-law.

Therefore, I was not worried at all that Song Hongyi would snatch Lin Ximeng from me, but I began to worry that the person Lin Ximeng liked was not me, but Song Hongyi.

In the evening self-study, Tian Xiao and Yang Mo were still so silent.

Yang Mo tried to break this silence and had a conversation with Tian Xiao through a note, not directly handing the note to Tian Xiao, but annoying Qiao Qiao to be a messenger. Similarly, the note sent back by Tian Xiao was also conveyed by Qiao Qiao.

After a few conversations, Yang Mo looked at the note and was stunned, and then he buried his head in his arms and lay motionless on the desk. It was a class, and he didn't write his homework, let alone make a sound.

This is a much more serious phenomenon than what I've seen before. Out of morality, I asked him with concern what was going on.

Yang Mo still buried his head in his arm and didn't say a word.

I pressed him repeatedly, and he finally got one eye out of his arm and looked at me, and it was full of tears.

I roughly understood what was happening between them. My tablemate, Yang Mo, he should be out of love.

Seeing him grief like that, my heart was also touched, combined with the shock brought to me by Lin Ximeng's note on this day, I suddenly wanted to write something.

I wasn't in the habit of keeping a diary, but on this day, I suddenly wanted to write something.

I and Lin Ximeng, Yang Mo and Tian Xiao are going through, perhaps the most important emotional journey in the world, the emotional journey of our two groups has changed dramatically almost at the same moment, but the result has developed in two diametrically opposite directions.

As a witness to this great change, an indescribable feeling rose in my heart, and at this moment it gushed out, and this writing is six pages full. I hope that the "childlike heart" that Lin Ximeng told me can make Yang Mo cheer up again, just like me.

I handed what I had written to Yang Mo to read.

Yang Mo still didn't say a word, he wiped his red eyes and quietly read the whole article. He then scribbled a few lines on the next page and handed me the notebook.

"A note about my content:

1. I never imagined that kind of development.

2. I wasn't an innocent child before, because I wasn't a child.

3. I'm not a 'mature and deep man' now, because I'm still giggling.

4. Tian Xiao and I have never had it before, so let's talk about breaking up.

5. Please stop talking about me and Tian Xiao.

6. This article involves personal private matters, and it is not allowed to be published and circulated, otherwise you will invade your personal privacy. Of course, if you want to publish it, please delete a few paragraphs related to me. ”

Yang Mo: What does this mean? Could it be that I'm thinking too much?

It's also oh, what do I think of Lin Ximeng, does Yang Mo also think of Tian Xiao? What is the angle from which you look at the problem, and do others look at the problem from the same angle? If you lose your "childlike heart", don't others have it?

I wanted to help my table mates, but it was self-defeating, I really thought too much.

In the second half of the self-study class, Yang Mo looked much better, he asked me to leave the notebook, wrote a few more paragraphs at the back of that page, and then handed it back to me.

"Actually, there was a time when I really liked her, wanted to do more for her, wanted to do better. Later, I also began to help her study and wanted to make her better. Later, I gave her some advice, but I don't know why she was always angry at my advice. Or maybe they don't want to pay attention to me and deliberately make me sad. But I do get really sad.

Now, especially these few days, it feels like she's changed a lot. Classrooms used to be filled with her voice wouldn't always be filled with her voice, but now ...... Maybe it's not bad to be lively, but I always feel that she is too far away from me.

I think we should really just be friends, and having it should be just a childlike heart. I want friendship, not love. I don't dare to predict the future, but if we can't really be lovers, I hope we can still be best friends.

Let everything that has passed pass. If I had a choice, I would like to 'start over' and truly become a close friend. Then I wish her a better life! ”

Looking at these words, I was deeply moved, and it seemed that I was indeed right. There must be many people in this world who are working the road of love like themselves. Being able to help them get out of their predicament is also a merit.

Those who are in pain, you may as well stop your hurried and dignified steps, take a step back, and restore the childlike heart you once had. Perhaps, you will find another world, and you will feel another life.