Liu Xiyao laughed at Bai Xue, "You have a bad personality like you, friends have to be together to deepen their relationship, eat together, and sing K together...... Especially close friends, you should take advantage of the present to build a good relationship with everyone, so that you will not be so lonely, otherwise the relationship will fade after a long time. ”

Although she laughed at Bai Xue, it was more like laughing at herself, she didn't have any friends around her, she worked hard to make money, worked hard to live, and had less contact with her classmates, along with her roommates in the dormitory.

As Liu Xiyao said, many people will spend a lot of time with friends, eating together, watching movies together, playing games together, and doing things together. People seem to be beginning to fear the shame of exposing loneliness to others.

They seem to be spending their time where it's worthwhile, and they do seem to be "very popular", "popular", or rather, "not lonely".

So, what about those who don't spend their time on how to take care of their relationships and are still on their own?

Is it really as Liu Xiyao said, has it become "shameful"?

Maybe Bai Xue doesn't agree, just like when she was studying at Ka University. Many Chinese students, on the first day of school at foreign universities, instead of greeting professors or local students, they sit in a pile of people with black hair and yellow skin, and our own countrymen. As a result, after a few years of reading, they speak Chinese better than before.

On the contrary, there are a small number of Chinese students who often go alone, and they basically communicate with foreigners from all over the world. The students who get together always ostracize them in turn, calling them "arrogant" and "unsocial".

It seems that these rumors have no effect on the latter, and he still holds a few books in his hand, strides heroically through the campus. Even when they were eating alone, they looked very comfortable, without the slightest look of embarrassment and nervousness.

Compared with the former, who start complaining to each other about what they can't do as soon as they get to the exam, the latter always seems to be calm and calm. Naturally, the final results come out, and most of the former hovers around the "pass", while the latter often have very good results.

Bai Xue was the latter at the time, and a large part of the factor was due to her personality, which made people think that she was arrogant and unsociable.

After becoming one of those types of people, their conversation and literacy let her know that it is definitely not because of their "low emotional intelligence" or "personality problems" that they seem to be "alone".

When teaching the secret of high scores, they say, "I just make the most of the time they spend going to the library together to read books and chat," "It's a waste of time to be together, they always have to wait, I hate waiting." Others have told me, "I don't have much to talk to them." ”

When the former circle could no longer help them grow and would not have any positive effect on their progress, they resolutely gave it up, abandoned those people, and voluntarily chose to be alone.

And this kind of loneliness is really not at all

Shame.

But after she came back, she changed, and she didn't like that kind of loneliness. The once arrogant man is gone.

How many of us have willingly given up our own time for the sake of so-called "friends"?

When I wanted to do something, my friend said, "Oh, what are you doing, I have time anyway", "Let's go out with everyone, it's a group activity", "You don't want to go?" Why are you so unsociable? ”

Most of the time, we have to choose to compromise.

In fact, the "herd mentality" is very scary, and we don't want to be an "outlier" in the group, the "unsociable" person.

But ask yourself: Have you really had the determination to achieve something?

Do you really have the consciousness to give up something for the sake of it?

Once we start working on what we want to have, or what we want to become, it means that we have to give up our comfort, we have to give up our comfortable lifestyle, we have to give up some of the things we have – it could be an opportunity to deepen our friendships with friends, or it could be your friends.

And the loneliness that comes with it can be devastating.

But you see, you can never move forward without giving up something.

Bai Xue is the only one of the four sisters in their college dorm who has been preparing to be a good pediatrician since she was in college.

While she was chewing on English and high math every day, the other five girls were lying on the bed playing with their mobile phones and watching Korean dramas. Originally, every weekend, several people made an appointment to go out to dinner together, but the girlfriends were unable to participate because of various activities at school. At first, everyone always complained about it, but then they refused a lot, not only this kind of dinner, but even some other group activities, and the other five girls didn't call her at all, one day, Bai Xue called Keiko very aggrievedly, saying that they had built a group behind her back, and the roommates who seemed to have a good relationship before, sometimes even said cool things to her in front of her.

White snow was squeezed out. After so many years, there is only one best friend she has never changed, and that is Keiko.

Despite this, Keiko and Han Yi never asked Bai Xue to make any changes, and even they were very proud, because Bai Xue never wavered in her determination. At that time, Han Yi and Keiko were very busy, but they would always find time to accompany her, when she felt lonely and lost her temper, Han Yi would always take the initiative to "scold" as soon as possible.

At that time, she was accompanied only by the sound of the wind outside the window and the books in the classroom that were blown by the cold wind that poured in through the cracks in the door.

When she was preparing to study abroad, her mind was almost full of all kinds of fixed collocations, various English words and professional knowledge. At that time, some classmates in the class always laughed at her, saying that she was too masochistic, and there was no need to work so hard to have such a boyfriend who had achieved his career early.

When I returned to the dormitory, some roommates were eating snacks while opening station B to watch anime, and they burst into laughter from time to time. She never contradicted, just

Quietly continued to leave the dormitory with the book in his arms. She didn't know if they were really as happy as they appeared, she only knew that the loneliness she was experiencing meant more to her than what she called "gregariousness".

Bai Xue also remembers now that when she knew her final results and won the opportunity to study abroad on a full scholarship, many classmates kept chasing her and asking for methods. She always didn't know what to say, and finally just told them, "I think it's harder to endure loneliness than to try." ”

Loneliness is not a shame. The shame is to pretend to be gregarious, in the noisy crowd, but not able to hear the voice of his heart, and laugh tiredly.

Han Yi also gave himself such a hint: the weak are used to gathering in groups, and the strong will always walk alone. This kind of psychological suggestion may be nonsense to other people, but it is useful for him, and he has come through it step by step.

I don't know if Bai Xue learned from him at the beginning, but now that time has passed, her thoughts have changed, right? Han Yi's loneliness has become a kind of neglect and indifference to her.

The "good relationship" in Liu Xiyao's mouth is actually networking, which is indeed very important, which may be the truth she realized in life.

However, there will be many people who think that compared with moving forward with the help of others, it is more important to really improve themselves, to become a person with a strong heart and full of confidence, a person who does not have to deliberately rely on others, but can make others dependent, even if he is alone, he is like a person with thousands of troops.

How much you give, life will surely return to you in some way.

Therefore, some people take the initiative to choose loneliness before loneliness chooses him.

Don't worry about the long and hopeless loneliness, because there will always be someone who is as strong as you and will join you on your journey and walk side by side with you. Together, become better people.

Bai Xue ordered a table of delicious food for Liu Xiyao, and most of them were the meat she loved to eat. The two chatted for a long time on such a "lonely and shameful" topic, expressing their opinions, without convincing each other, and talked happily.

It's just that Bai Xue seems to be very conflicted, she doesn't feel lonely and shameful, why is she so desperate for Han Yi to put down her work to accompany her?

(End of chapter)