Every time Bai Xue said something, it was like giving an order to Han Yi, saying that if you don't contact, you won't contact, and if you don't bother, you won't bother, and the two of them hide each other in their hearts like this, and they don't say a word or see each other.

It was already past 0:00 in the morning, Han Yi was on the plane to Shanghai, Bai Xue woke up from a sleep, and was waiting for Liu Xiyao to come back.

"I feel like I don't want to like him anymore." This is what Liu Xiyao said to Bai Xue when she talked about her relationship experience.

Before Bai Xue could ask why, she said the reason herself, "I'm tired of being with him, and I want to please him every day, and I hate myself like this."

Liu Xiyao and that boyfriend, now ex-boyfriend to be exact, they met by chance outside school, the boy is five or six years older than him, ordinary office workers, they have chatted a few times on WeChat, eaten together a few times, met alone a few times, in Liu Xiyao's words, and then they were together naturally.

They are also in love like ordinary couples, and each of her circle of friends shows their affection, playing games together, traveling together, eating and drinking together, which is really sweet. It seems that in the eyes of many people, they are the kind that will get married.

Liu Xiyao said the reason why she didn't want to like it, and Bai Xue might not be able to understand it.

"In order to have a common topic with him, I play games with him, and I play late every day, although my skills have improved, but I really don't like to play games, and the more I go to the back, the more I feel that it is a waste of time; Basically, several times a week, I will go with him to eat and drink with various friends, and play until late, and every time it is nothing more than eating, playing mahjong, K songs, not interested but not good because of his face, this kind of activity is also very tired of me, and I haven't read seriously for a long time, and even sometimes I have to skip class or ask for leave; Every day, I have to worry about whether he will mess with flowers, and I have to act as an old mother to solve his various troubles with him, and I don't like it very much. ”

This is the specific reason given by Liu Xiyao, and in the end, from the previous incomprehension to the later, Bai Xue actually began to sympathize with her a little. Because falling in love with someone, and making himself hate falling in love with him, it seems a little uneconomical.

At that time, she hadn't had a conflict with Han Yi, but sometimes she blamed Han Yi in her heart for not having time to accompany her, that's all. She is also asking herself, is it because of this love that she has become less like herself.

If in a love, because of blindly obeying each other, accommodating each other's lives, and living as each other's accessories, it is indeed very sad to think about it.

"Love is a very beautiful word, and I love you, it was also a very beautiful sentence, I love you with a beautiful self, and finally because I love you, I also fall in love with a better self, I think this is the most beautiful place to love. I love you, not only because of what you do for me, but also because of what I can do for you. ”

As Roy Creeft said, I love you, not just because of the way you look, but because of the way I am when I'm with you.

Bai Xue knows a friend of her sister, who is a girl from the same town as them, named Daya, who is a model of becoming perfect for love.

Daya and her boyfriend met at a birthday party, when Daya was in her third year of high school and the boy was in her third year at a decent university in Beijing. There are always friends around me who persuade Daya not to fall in love unrealistically and waste study time, after all, studying in the third year of high school is really intense.

At that time, Daya was very stubborn and insisted on being with boys, and tried to be with boys at all costs.

At that time, Daya's grades were only enough for one or three books, and for the sake of that boy, she really began to concentrate on studying, getting up at five o'clock in the morning to memorize books, often staying up all night at night, and always following the teacher's ass to ask questions, and the whole one lived like a good student. Because the foundation is relatively poor, and Daya's goals for herself at that time are really a bit high, the gap between the exam results and her expectations, and the hard work and harvest are not so obvious, all of which have made Daya sad, but fortunately, the boy has been by her side during that time, encouraging her, sharing learning methods with him, and finding her shortcomings.

With the encouragement of the boy she likes, Daya insists on continuing to work hard and is also making progress little by little. She wrote down the boy's school on paper and pasted it on the desk to motivate herself every day, and every time she wanted to give up, she thought about the boy's words, and she had the courage to persevere.

In the end, Sanben Daya was admitted to the school where her boyfriend was located. Sister Bai Xue and those friends often make fun of her, saying that the power of love is so great.

And the power of love has not stopped, when Daya was a freshman, her boyfriend was already a senior and began to run for work. And that boy is very knowledgeable, very smart and capable, Daya wants to make himself more worthy of him, so he reads a wide range of books in various aspects, music, art, management, life, Daya has dabbled. In the end, in order to be able to talk more extensively, Daya has studied all aspects of car knowledge, games and even various wines, even if there are things she has never heard of, she also fully enriches herself, in order to have more topics with her boyfriend, and to be able to give her boyfriend some mature views when he talks to her about work.

In the eyes of these friends, Daya has always been a girl who knows a lot of things. Later, her boyfriend decided to develop in Beijing, and Daya's mother made it clear early on that she would go home to work nearby after graduation, unless she really had the ability to mix well in Beijing.

Daya didn't want to be separated from her boyfriend, she participated in various organizations at school to improve her ability to gain more experience, and became the president of the student union in her junior year, and her ability was also recognized by the teachers in all aspects.

In his spare time, Daya also took the initiative to intern in various companies to increase his knowledge. The boy also encouraged Daya to exercise more, and gave her a lot of advice to help her find an internship in a company. In short, at that time, Daya was in love and trying to talk to himself well.

After graduating, Daya was successfully admitted to a good advertising agency, her mother also allowed her to develop in Beijing, and her relationship with her boyfriend is getting better and better.

Daya and her boyfriend are in love, they have been making progress together and getting better together, no wonder they are getting better and better.

For Yu Daya, this love can be regarded as changing her life, allowing her to break through herself, do what she thought she couldn't do, and live the life she wants. Daya once said to me: I love him, but I love myself more and more because I like him.

"I love you because you can bring out the most authentic part of me." It was Han Yi who made her feel this way. Similarly, Han Yi has always felt that Bai Xue has made herself, and she has made herself better.

Falling in love is a very important experience in life, and in love, the best partner is probably the one that can evoke the most authentic part of you, and the best love is that you will become better because you like him.

A phrase that used to be popular on the Internet:

"What does it feel like to love someone?"

"It seems that there is a weakness all of a sudden, and at the same time there is armor."

"Because I love you, I am willing to be better, I am willing to insist on doing certain things, I will love you at the same time, but also fall in love with the self who becomes better because of love." This should be the best feeling between lovers.

Like Daya, love people well and let his presence make her the best version of herself.

Bai Xue hopes that one day, Han Yi can say to her very affectionately: "My dear, thank you, because loving you makes me a better version of myself, I love you, and I also love myself who is getting better and better in our love."

This is enough to prove how important she is to Han Yi. A high-quality relationship is probably this: I love you, but I love the self who is with you even more.

Liu Xiyao and her ex-boyfriend separated, not because they were not good enough for each other, just like they were together naturally, and they also broke up naturally.

People in the world always say that there is no reason to love someone, but the strange thing is that some people can find many reasons to break up.

There are many such cases around Bai Xue.

She is a very accommodating girl with her boyfriend, and her boyfriend is also recognized as a good person. They have known each other since high school, and they have been in a very stable relationship for seven or eight years. At the New Year's reunion, everyone thought that they would usher in the good news of their engagement this year, but they didn't expect that they still couldn't hold the seven-year itch.

Not to mention that the people around her think this result is incredible, even the more she thinks about it, the more unreasonable she feels. In the past seven years, even if they have a cold war, they have never been more than one night, and they have even said that they will get engaged after graduation, but why did they break up with her when they stabilized.

"There must be something wrong with this! Am I doing something wrong? She asked her boyfriend in tears.

When many people are broken up, they think that they must not break up like this, so the more they ask, the worse the result they get.

Her boyfriend told her that in fact, he had wanted to say it a long time ago, and he felt that they were not suitable for each other, but he was afraid that she would be unstable when she first came out, so he couldn't bear to say it, and he also wanted to think about it for a while and give each other a chance.

However, in the last year, it has become more obvious that she speaks harshly, is not sunny enough, and thinks about anything very naïve, he doesn't know if it's love, and feels like his sister.

The more she tried to explain, the more disagreements she bringed. Until the end, her boyfriend felt that the communication was meaningless, and the friend who was still not dead went to ask his family and brother to try to find out the truth about the breakup.

mean, naïve, vindictive, insecure······ She didn't expect to end up with such an adjective.

Everyone around him told her, "It's because you're not good enough that he's shaken." ”

Sometimes, things that you haven't experienced can also get some experience and insights from what happened to others, and Bai Xue can only feel her love from other people's experiences.

This is a very materialistic era, and everything is following the trading principles of the market economy. He leaves you either because he is not good enough or you are not good enough. If you want to get back to your old life, you have to change yourself, you have to become better and more compatible.

For this reason, he even did not hesitate to torture himself, like an ancient woman wearing embroidered shoes, to echo the so-called excellence.

During that time, in order to change the shortcomings he said, the girl set these keywords as mobile phone wallpapers and reminded herself every day. His boyfriend did think she had gotten better, but she trembled every word she said and did everything. After working hard, in the end, it was still her boyfriend's last goodbye.

How many people like to leave with the title of "not suitable" seems to be a universal word when breaking up.

When they try to find the cause, some people who are overly self-examining will point all the problems at themselves.

"He doesn't love me, it must be because I'm not good enough. If I'm good enough, good enough, then he'll stay. ”

But if it is really so unsuitable, it will not take seven years to understand a person's bottom line, which has witnessed each other's growth almost since adolescence. And people who break up on this ground after a few months together, don't fully understand each other, why not talk about it?

Actually, there is not so much truth, it's just that the heart has changed, so everything has changed.

However, in fact, that girl is not as exaggerated as others describe, in fact, she is very humorous and lively in front of her friends, although she is hard-mouthed and sometimes complains about others, and her brain is open to say some angry words, but she is often a person who will be bought by the enemy for a piece of sugar, not to mention any revenge.

thought that her boyfriend joked and praised her at the beginning, and she was considerate like a mother, but in the end, she said that she was like a sister.

When the heart is on her, she says everything is good, and when the heart runs away from her, everything is wrong.

Separation is not just related to her own charm, but her position in the other party's heart has changed, so any shortcomings have been magnified.

It is humble and pathetic to use the excuse of the other person's change of heart as a pressure to torture yourself, and to think that if you don't even cherish yourself.

If three or four years ago, Bai Xue felt that she was the happiest girl in the world, and the pure love between each other was not mixed with anything else. At that time, she knew that only when she became better would Han Yi love her more and more, so she had to live as well as before!

Love also follows the law of the jungle, and after a few years, people will only remember the one who had a good life.

In order to pursue true love, the suave poet Xu Zhimo divorced Zhang Youyi before giving birth to his child. And Zhang Youyi, who was alone in Germany, did not complain to anyone, even if the child she raised alone died in the end, she still insisted on studying alone in Germany. Although Xu Zhimo was not allowed to return to his side in the end, he was still praised by Xu Zhimo many times.

Imagine if Zhang Youyi did not have self-esteem and self-love after being abandoned, future generations would probably only know Xu Zhimo's love story. The forbearance behind this will not appear in anyone's memory at all.

Love is inherently unfair, and the one who hurts the most is often the weaker party in the love relationship. You give more than he does, you care more, and the deeper you sink. Those memories of the past, those visions for the future, those beliefs that used to keep working hard to love someone, when all are destroyed, the person who was broken up always thinks that he has nothing left, so the person who was hurt is drunk, insomnia, and even degenerate.

Now Bai Xue felt that she could only think deeply about the relationship between her and Han Yi and reflect on their respective problems.

At least now I can't help but lose myself because I am separated from him.

The confusion she feels now, the sadness she feels, and even the inability to let go of everything are not because she is not good enough, but because she doesn't know where she is good, and the other is that Han Yi herself has not dealt with the problem well.

Maybe everyone is persuading, like Li Jia, Keiko and Nuan Nuan, they are all persuading them not to care so much, it is enough to be together.

Everything needs to be listened to and judged by herself, and her judgment is, wait, wait, wait······

Character is a person's established attributes, as the saying goes, the country is easy to change, but the nature is difficult to change, this is Bai Xue, it was like this in the past, and it is the same now.

Some people have the will to start from the beginning, and some people have the longing to pursue love in their bones. The former met, and may really love only one person in his life, the former and the latter met, and after falling in love, they should learn something from each other that they don't have, and when the latter meet, they should just have a glass of spirits and be happy.

And Bai Xue is both the former and the latter, she loves Han Yi and wants to be in love at the beginning.

Although love needs to run in with each other to become each other's best appearance, unilateral changes are not called run-in, but will only hurt themselves, and Han Yi also needs to make corresponding contributions.

In any case, before Han Yi came to her, she wanted to make herself better.

The gentle and lively person is her, the insecure person is her, and the person who stupidly believes in the future is also her.