I observed that my ambiguous words made the atmosphere in the whole room freeze in an instant. For Cao Ge and his father, they must have hoped to get my affirmative answer. For example, I said that I would go back in a few days, or that I would pack up and leave with you now, etc. But I couldn't.

At that time, I was no longer waiting for anyone in Toronto, nor was I angry with anyone. Perhaps the basement in Toronto will make me feel closer to the darkness of the real society than the comfort and comfort of being at home, that is, full of a sense of urgency and crampedness.

That night, Arauy took me to find a medium hotel for my father and his party. The environment is much better than the one I lived in before. They stayed in Toronto for a total of five days, and every day, almost every day, Cao Ge would ask me: "Mu Xi, you can go back with me." "And I kept shaking my head.

During those five days, I almost never had any positive communication with my father.

Before leaving, Cao Ge held my hand at the airport, and she cried: "You say, why are you the same as your mother, why are you so tough?" You say, if your mother is here, don't you be able to leave either? I curled the corners of my mouth and smiled, "Not necessarily." Cao Ge cried even more fiercely. She pushed me: "You kid, when I was a child, I thought Cancan was not worry-free, but now it's good, it's all the other way around." Okay, you're that old too. I also know that it is useless to persuade you, so you can take care of yourself. I nodded.

After passing through security, I watched the three of them board the plane. I saw my father turn his head twice, and his eyes were always sloppy and one-sided when he looked behind him. It's like pretending to be looking at someone else. Actually, I knew that he was actually watching me in the midst of the hurried crowd. At that moment, I don't know why, I suddenly had a feeling of parting. It's like, after the three people in front of him wave their hands, it will be more difficult to meet again.

So, the moment Cao Ge and the others turned around and disappeared into the boarding gate, I turned my head and cried. Arauy put his arm around my shoulder: "Mu Xi, is that your aunt?" I wiped my tears and nodded.

"You're really what your aunt said you are, you're really tough. You just go back, you say, even I don't know, what are you standing up in Toronto? You have to know that every year passes very fast, and in the blink of an eye, they are all old. "When Arauy and I mentioned the word old, I suddenly felt sad again.

On the way back, my emotions calmed down a bit. I told Arauy, let alone her, that I didn't know what I was holding on to in Toronto.

Towards the door, I offered to go for a cup of coffee. Arauy agreed. So, we found an open-air café by the river. I stirred with a small spoon as I said to Arauy, "I want to tell you a secret. ”

Arauy's eyes widened: "Secret? ”

"Well, the secret of my origins, the secrets of myself." Before that, I had only told Arauy that my mother had passed away. And all the details of this before and after, I never mentioned to Arauy.

Arauy sat across from me and listened to me quietly, she didn't speak, she didn't have any questions, she watched me get up, sit down, get up again. She listened to me calmly, as if she were telling someone else's story. After saying that, Arauy looked at me: "I may understand, I seem to know from your account why you didn't return to China. I'm older than you, but I'm not a few years older. I didn't expect that your life would be so complicated, and it would soon be written and made into a TV series. I don't have as much insight into life as you, but I've had that of you. It's the kind of thing that wants to escape from a certain environment, and then you don't even know what you want to do or what you're doing. Mu Xi, do you know? I think that the more you are like this, the more you should live a chic life. God will not let a person be unhappy all the time, so you have to believe that your future is promising. But then again, I still want you to call the police. ”

I shook my head: "I know, Zhao Song is hateful and hateful. I also hate him, hate his unkindness, and hate his good acting skills. But, Arauy, you know what? For me, I am more grateful to Zhao Song for this vivid lesson in my life than the loss of money. It was he who told me that money can be earned when it is gone, but when people's fighting spirit is gone, it is really wasted. "I was right, but I wasn't lying, I really felt that way at the time, and I was fighting for the future. However, I forgot that man is a species that does not have a long life.

Arauy nodded, "What's next for you?" ”

I sighed and turned my head to look at the river: "I don't know. Take it one step at a time, really. It's just that although the cake shop is good, it makes me feel terrible at ease. Many people say that after all this I have been through, comfort should be something I can't ask for. But in fact, the company where I interned in China may be due to the nature of the work, and I always felt like I was beaten at that time. I felt like I needed to live that way and get myself back into the passion. ”

Arauy nodded: "Mu Xi, since you have a goal, then do it according to your goal." I smiled.

Immediately after that, I started looking for a job. However, due to salary and housing and other related issues, this job was not so smooth. It wasn't until half a month later that I found a company that was more suitable for me.

The HR director in charge of the interview was very impressed, and it was only natural that I was transferred from the cake shop to the new unit. However, it also means that I am separating from Arauy.

Before leaving, Arauy was like Cao Ge and like my mother. While helping me pack my things, I chattered endlessly. And I, like an ignorant schoolboy, sat on the edge of the bed and watched her help me with everything.

This Arauy seems to me to feel powerless even with words like "great gratitude".

It's just that the existence of a benefactor is a springboard for a person in a difficult time and the grace of God. No matter how much this person has helped you, most of the suffering still needs to be faced by yourself alone.

The new working environment is still good. It is located in the heart of downtown Toronto, with a centralized office area. Mainly engaged in foreign export trade.

In the early stages of work, the headache of the documents almost made me vomit blood, but I gritted my teeth and persevered.

Later, when I thought back to that time, I really worked hard. That state is several times higher than in China, and the enthusiasm for work also makes me stand out in performance. In just four months, I went from a small employee to the middle level of the company. That's what I've worked hard day and night.

After becoming a middle leader, I had a few employees under my command. And most of them are young people. When I'm not busy, I especially like to chat with them, listen to their perceptions of life, listen to their complaints about their work, and their dissatisfaction with life. I'm not sick, it's just that they made me understand that no one's life is easy. Behind the surface of everyone's scenery there is unknown pain and sorrow.

They keep me in constant tension about life and life.

Yes, I must admit that my nerves were tense all the time during those days.

Gain and loss.

I would go shopping and eat with Arauy when I was on vacation. In the months since he left, Arauy had a brief relationship, which ended in failure.

Before the Chinese New Year, Cao Ge called me and said that he wanted me to go back. I quit on the grounds that I was busy with work. And actually, I have holidays. But for some reason he rejected her. I lied to Canada, foreign but Chinese New Year.

Cao Ge was visibly frustrated on the other side of the phone.

During the Spring Festival that year, I did spend overtime. I found that I seemed to feel alive only if I kept myself busy.

During the Chinese New Year, I received a text message from Cao Cancan. She said that my father was not in good health, and I replied simply: "Ah, then let him pay more attention." After that, there was no movement.

A year later, I was assigned to a new region and became a region manager. This change in position has allowed me to meet more people. By chance, I met A. He is a Canadian, and he specializes in economic and trade docking with our company. He is a young and promising successful person. On the second meeting, he began to pursue me.

Maybe it's because no one around me has cared about it for a long time, or maybe it's because Zhao Song's matter has made me more vigilant, so I've always been not far away from A.

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