The family tried their best to keep Kan Tao for dinner, but Kan Tao refused. After this guy walked away from the door in a panic, Cao Cancan was stunned for a long time on the sofa holding his notebook. It is not difficult to guess that Aunt Qin passed away, Cao Cancan had no backbone, Kan Tao, as the target of her ignorant youth, came to Cao Cancan's side like a cloak messenger in the days when Cao Cancan was in the quagmire, Cao Cancan soon stretched out the tentacles of his heart to him, and went all the way up, chasing the sun.

Cao Ge came down from upstairs, looked out the door, and then looked at Cao Cancan who was sitting on the sofa: "Yo! What happened to the princess? Cao Cancan sniffed: "It's nothing." ”

"Nothing? What do you hold in your arms? Let me see! Cao Ge snatched the notebook and opened it to see Kan Tao's neat handwriting: "This little boy writes well!" Specially delivered? Attentively, attentively. Cao Ge sighed with emotion while watching, and squinted at Cao Cancan. Cao Cancan stood up and snatched the notebook: "I'm upstairs." With that, he ran away.

Cao Ge looked at this girl's actions and smiled inadvertently: "What's the situation?" Cao Ge looked up and asked me.

I shrugged, "I don't know." ”

"It doesn't hurt. This kind of youthful liking is the purest. Unfortunately, I didn't. When Cao Ge finished saying this, he lowered his head slightly and looked at the coffee table in front of him, his eyes full of regret.

In fact, I always feel that regret is graded. Regrets such as this kind of regret caused by the lack of mercy of the years are lifelong, and regrets exist, but the degree accounts for fifty percent of the depression. If, however, the years give you the opportunity to wash away what is changeable due to some characteristic of yourself, or power, then that regret will surely occupy all the sorrow of the time when you look back at the bloody storm of life at some point in the future.

I think, you know what I'm talking about. Yes, that's right, it's my mother.

After relieving himself on the sofa, Cao Ge looked up at me. She stared at me for a full ten seconds, and I couldn't feel comfortable. Just when I wanted to turn around and run away, Cao Ge suddenly spoke: "I asked you to see your mother, did you go?" ”

I stood still and didn't dare to move: "No. ”

"Why?"

I was blindsided by the question of why. yes, why? For those two slaps? For gas? To punish her, the annoyance and sadness she caused me because of her mistakes and miscalculations? In order to resent her, I was subjected to human affection at a young age? Probably both. But I don't know which reason I should talk to Cao Ge about in order to use it as a reason to prevaricate the past.

Seeing that I didn't answer for a long time, Cao Ge asked again: "Why?" ”

"There's no why."

"Your mother is sick." When Cao Ge said this, he took his eyes off my face. I paused: "Cold? ”

Cao Ge didn't answer, and he didn't have an expression. She put down her crossed legs and moved forward: "Xue Hao and I plan to change houses for her." If you're afraid of being gossiped about by your classmates around school, let her come around here. You're going to see her more. The ups and downs of Cao Ge's words were almost inaudible, and I didn't find any other emotions in these words.

is as simple as me, Cao Ge's words are bland and tasteless, and it makes me feel that there is no answer, that is just a cold from the change of seasons, or, plus some restlessness and anxiety caused by the death of Aunt Qin. Because I'm small, my rectum is straight.

Later, I learned that there is a kind of hypocrisy in this world, just like me, who will throw all the unforgivable mistakes I have made to the world's misfortune and young ignorance. Then I realized that ignorance is ignorance, and adding a young person in front of ignorance is a sign of evading responsibility.

When I wrote this book, I was ghostwritten by a good friend of mine. As she typed on the keyboard, she asked me repeatedly, "Your mind was so complicated when you were 10 years old?" Thinking too much! How old is 10 years old, and it is contrary to common sense for you to force the thinking of adults on the psychology of children. ”

I explained, "You don't understand. Whether a person is mature or not has nothing to do with age, and people in their sixties and seventies are immature, which is also very much existent. Part of the maturity of human psychology depends on nature, just like many people are born to think about life, some people are still heartless after experiencing the various states of life and life and death, this is not the difference between living tired and frivolous, it is people's views and understanding of society and life perception. At that time, we didn't have the same fancy world as today's children, especially me, poverty and life experience made me ineffective, and in those years, I seemed to change my mentality every day. But I'll tell you, now that I think about it, I hate myself the most for always subconsciously telling myself, it's okay, I'm still young, I'm still young, how will I be when I grow up. You know? Growing up, it's too late for too many things. ”

The friend didn't speak, she just raised her pen and wrote a few words: "No regrets, no youth; No regrets, no life. ”

She is right, but when emotional people perceive life, they will still amplify the pain in their hearts, especially those related to all emotions, such as the loss of family affection.

Cao Ge got up to go upstairs, and when she was holding on to the handrail of the stairs, she suddenly turned back to me and said, "Your mother loves you very much." With that, he went upstairs slowly.

My mom loves me a lot. I savored this in my heart. Love me? Love me, why did you treat my childhood like this? Why did you love me, and you threw me into a thorny place and ignored me?

After a few years, I suddenly understood that in this world, people are different, and the definition and expression of love are also different. Aunt Qin, Zhang Jing, mother, Cao Ge, they are quiet in a corner of the Cao family, or reading books, or drinking tea, or wearing sweaters, or painting red lips, presumably, they were also the products of the quiet years, not fighting, not angry, with good thoughts, looking forward to the shallow moon with the eyebrows of the future. However, the rainy day is a very annoying thing, which makes these women carry light love and saltiness from the moment they step out of the gate of the Cao family. It washes the thick ink and color in the bottom of people's hearts, it drenches the book, it mixes the tea, it pours the wool, it spends the blush on the face, it makes these women in their respective lives before they open their mouths to say love, learn to shed tears before they say love, look left and right, and have no time to say love to love, so they leave a void in vain.

The courtyard of the Cao family is easy to get in, but difficult to get out.

On the way to Cao's house, there seem to be two little ghosts who want money, there is money to keep money, there is no money to keep dreams, and there are no dreams to keep their lives. Yes, and then this vote of people went in and out of the Cao family a few times, exhausted to look at the door of Hessen, the red dust came and went without willows and flowers, it's just, fate wants to bury love in the bottom of the heart, or to the children, or to the lover, or to life, or to everything that has been missed, bury it, the door that can't get out is better than an empty and loveless heart.

After all, there are always two pairs of shoes in a person's life, one pair walking by the river and the other pair walking through the thorns. This standard life configuration, but there are always people who are wrong because of panic. They wore shoes by the water and walked all over the thorns, and as a result, the hardships and dangers made the faces of their youth hideous, and the blood shed through their dreams poured back into their hearts, and they lost their great love and were speechless, if you ask her what's wrong? She will smile back to you: "I'm walking my thousands of rivers and mountains!" ”

Well, everyone has overcome all the way to the other side of life, just like my mother, who said to me with a smile when she was dying: "Mu Xi, in this life, it is enough to have you." ”

When I was thinking about Cao Ge's words, I stood by the coffee table for a long time, so long that Cui Yu rang the doorbell and scared me.

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Sogou