When I got back to the university, I thought I would forget the so-called haze, but the haze seemed to become clearer and clearer the more I remembered. After about half a month, Zhang Xiaoyan told me something, that thing, I had been contradicted for a long time, he said: "Yongning, go back to your hometown!" Zhang Moran, she has advanced lymphoma, and she is about to die. She has only one wish now, she wants to see you one last time. ”

Originally, I had already planned not to see each other again in this life. However, they are obviously best friends, so why should I not meet them? Zhang Moran or not, at least they are classmates who have been together for two years, so even if I was reluctant, I still asked for leave, returned to the city where I was home, and came to the hospital where Zhang Moran was hospitalized to visit her.

I didn't buy anything, any fruit baskets, any tulips, I didn't buy anything, the only thing I brought with me was a crumpled blank piece of paper. I know the story of that blank paper, only Zhang Moran and I know. She probably thought I had thrown the blank sheet away, but I didn't. I've been secretly tucked into my English book, and it's been three or four years now!

When I arrived at the door of the ward where Zhang Moran was hospitalized, I didn't go in directly. Instead, he stood at the door of the ward and looked at Zhang Moran lying on the hospital bed inside. She was much haggard, and her eyes were weak. I don't have the energy I had in high school anymore. Look at her hair, although it is all there, it is already sparse and gray. I heard Zhang Xiaoyan say that Zhang Moran wanted to leave the best appearance for me, so he did not receive radiotherapy but only chemotherapy, so his hair did not fall out.

The moment I saw her, I really couldn't convince myself, I obviously cared about it! Why should I pretend I don't care at all! I cried, I cried so hard at that moment, I left tears in my eyes, I pushed open the door of Moran's ward, and then I cried and said to her, "Why? Zhang Moran, tell me why? You snatched my tears in the first place, you made me so sad that I left, why did you call me back! Do you want my tears so much? Do you really want to see me cry out loud in front of you? ”

When she saw me come in, she began to cry herself, and listening to her trembling voice, my heart felt as if it had been cut by a knife. It's supposed to be good friends who can be together for a lifetime, but why is it because of such a thing, I don't know what to do. There is a huge world, why can't we tolerate each other!

She said: "I, I didn't expect you to really come to see me, Yongning, I, I'm sorry for you, in fact, I was already diagnosed with lymphoma, and it was in the middle stage, I actually wanted to tell you that I liked Li Xinyang's affairs, but the doctor said that I could die at any time, so I didn't tell you, I just thought, I don't have to tell you, you will understand, understand me, I don't know, things will develop like this!" ”

"You had lymphoma, you told me! In your eyes, am I so untrustworthy? I'm your friend! I took out the crumpled white paper, which was now yellow, and said to Mo Ran: "Zhang Mo Ran, do you remember this white paper?" You see, it was you who said that we were going to be good friends for life like that blank piece of paper! But you won't tell me about you! How unworthy of your belief I am! ”

Mo Ran wiped the tears from her face, and then said to me, "Yongning, do you know how much I envy you? No matter how I study, I just don't study as well as you, no matter how hard I try, I just can't become like you, do whatever I want! No matter how I use my illness in exchange for Li Xinyang's sympathy, but Li Xinyang is always the only one in his heart, and even that car accident happened because it seems that your letter wants to come back and tell you how he feels about you! ”

"Do you know how much I hate you? You don't know at all, you don't know what it's like to be silently by your side for two years without your excellent person. Anything, the benefits have to fall on your head, no matter how hard I try, in the end, as long as you are a little light, everything will be solved, how serious I write the homework, and even scratch a little I will tear it up and rewrite it, but it's not your casually written homework in front of the whole school, you know, this is not just envy, this is hate, this is jealousy, this is this is that I hate you! "The first time Mo Ran said these words in front of me, I thought, I didn't think it would be like this.

I've never thought about it that way, I've never thought about showing anything in front of Moran. I'm just being myself! I really never thought that my behavior would be so disgusting to my side and my best friend, and if she had told me earlier, I would have changed it sooner. If I could have gotten better, wouldn't this series of embarrassing and unreminiscent things have happened between us?

I walked up to Mo Ran, held her hand, and then said to her, "Mo Ran, don't say it, I know what I did was really bad." I know, I shouldn't do this or that to make you think, alas, forget it, now you, should think about how to restore your health, you can rest assured, I will definitely find you the best doctor in the world, even if it is to spend all the money I have saved after going to college in the past few years, I will definitely give it to you, let you get back to health! ”

Mo Ran cried and clenched my hand, and then said to me: "Yongning, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm not, I didn't mean to, I really don't know what to do!" I, I control myself, I, I don't know why things are the way they are! I really didn't think so, I was, I didn't think things would develop at the time, it would develop like this! ”

Mo Ran said while crying. I really felt that at that moment, we both seemed to understand what it means to be a real friend. That kind of thing, even if it is a friend who has quarreled for three or four years, the contradiction is said, and our friendship can be continued, but in the end, the friendship of our life has come to an end.

Sometimes, I really lose the things I care about! She still didn't survive for a few more days, and died on the third day after I saw her. At that time, I cried very badly. Obviously, it can last a lifetime of friendship! Why, that's it! I don't want to, I don't want this! Why, everything I care about, I'm going to lose!

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